The problem, of course, is never leaving. The problem is coming back.
When Rachel stole Percy's pegasus, after Kronos had been destroyed, and ignored Nico di Angelo's warning, she was leaving. And some part of her, some place deep down inside, knows that this was by far the stupidest thing she'd ever done. Some part of her knows that she isn't coming back.
But, brave and stubborn as she is, Rachel keeps flying. She pushes the voices, the warnings, to the back of her mind, because this is what she's supposed to do. This is why she can see through the Mist, why her dreams come true. She wants to see more. She wants to be the Oracle of Delphi.
She flies past the magical barriers, thinking smugly that this must be a sign that what she's doing is right, and she hopes that this will be over and done with before Percy Jackson catches up to her. He'll try to talk her out of it, and she can't let that happen. She's going to be the Oracle, and there's nothing he can do about it. This is her destiny, just like his was to save the world. She gets to be important, too, even if she isn't a demigod. Even if she isn't a hero.
Once she lands, once she makes clear her purpose, Chiron tries to explain. The risks, what might go wrong. He says something about someone else who tried, some lady named May, but she isn't really listening. I know I can do this. I know it'll be fine. Just trust me.
He mentions how Hades cursed the Oracle, and she tells him about her dream. Okay, she might be stretching the truth a little with some of the details, but they're only white lies. Anything so that she can do this. Anything so that she can fulfill her destiny.
She steps towards the Big House. She does what Chiron tells her to do, follows his instructions to the letter. No room for error here. And then-
-someone else is here-
No, no, she's alone, alone, alone in her mind, but-
-someone else is here, something else is here-
And she's scared, she wants out, but that can't happen now-
-visions and flashes and flickers, oh you foolish mortal-
Vaguely, she hears people behind her, Percy Jackson and Annabeth Chase and Nico di Angelo, but she can't, she can't turn around and she can't speak and she can't breathe and there's this thing in here, with her, in her mind, and she sees these things, these horrible things-
-too much, too much, she can't hold it, she can't handle it-
-you should not have come-
-you should not have tried-
She wants to leave, but these flickers, these visions, they're paralyzing, they-
-GET OUT!-
She screams and screams and screams, and the world's crumbling around her, and she can't think, she can't feel, she can only scream and these voices won't leave and the visions won't leave and it's all shattered it's all broken-
"Rachel!"
"Oh, gods, Rachel!"
"What's happening to her?"
But she can't comprehend the words anymore.
She's in the infirmary. The only thing Percy Jackson can do is hope and pray to every god he's ever heard of that she'll be okay, that Rachel Elizabeth Dare won't turn out like May Castellan. That Hades lifted the curse and this happens to everyone who tries to be the Oracle and she'll be okay. It's been an hour and they've left her alone and it'll all be okay once she calms down.
But one look at Chiron's expression tells him that something went wrong, again. Something isn't right.
And that she's gone.
He sprints to the infirmary anyways, and he sees her straight away, bright red hair and brighter green eyes that look completely fucking insane. They're no spark Rachel in them.
At least she's stopped screaming, but there's no recognition in her eyes, like he's a stranger to her.
"Rachel?" he says uncertainly. Oh, gods, Rachel…
Her eyes narrow a little, and then she smiles. It's a scary smile, a crazed smile, and he has a flashback of moldy sandwiches and burned cookies and glowing eyes. Don't let Rachel be like that, he's praying. Don't let that happen to Rachel. Let her get better.
She has to get better.
"You remind me of someone," she says, and her voice is distant and, at the same time, too clear and too precise. "Do I know you?"
And that's when he knows that Rachel Elizabeth Dare is gone, and that she isn't coming back.
"No," he replies, fighting to keep his voice steady. "No, you don't. I'm… I'm sorry." I'm sorry for everything.
This is my fault.
It's stupid, really, because it isn't his fault. Technically, it's his father's fault. Hades was the one who cursed the Oracle; Nico is simply his son. So, really, none of the blame should be on his shoulders, because if Zeus hadn't killed his mother decades ago-
But he's still the son of Hades. And as soon as he just started to be accepted, as soon as he just started to fit in… no one who ever met Rachel will be able to look at him ever again without thinking of what happened to her. He's still an outcast.
And as long as the Hades children are outcasts, the curse will never be lifted…
So he melts back into the shadows and tells himself that he can never come back to Camp Half-Blood. He can never come back here. It's not like it was ever his home, anyways. It's not like he was ever really accepted here, even before the whole damned camp found out that he was the son of Hades.
"I'm sorry, Rachel," he finds himself whispering. "I'm so sorry."
It isn't his fault, but he's sorry anyways.
When it's time to live and let die
And you can't get another try
Something inside this heart has died
You're in ruins
A/N: Just a little something that popped into my head while I was rereading The Last Olympian. I mean, what would've happened if Hades hadn't lifted the curse yet? Rachel would have gone completely fucking insane, just like May Castellan.
If I get enough reviews, I'll turn this into a multi-chapter story. If not, well… it's a perfectly fine one-shot, right?
Review please!
I do not own Percy Jackson and the Olympians or 21 Guns by Green Day.
