Note: If you haven't read the previous story, "The Dangerous Life" (link in my profile), this probably won't make much sense. So go read that one first!
It was the first week of September, and the weather was gorgeous. On this particular day, the city was vibrant with activity, from couples strolling under stone arches to children tugging at their parents' sleeves for money to buy a chocolate to street vendors hoping to sell their hand-made crafts. As Kim drove her silver Vespa through the antiquated streets, her stomach turned in nervous anticipation of the day to come. It was weird, but situations like this always got to her a lot more than her "hero missions" back in the day, or even the sitch a few months ago that ended with a panicked getaway in Northern Alaska.
Kim finally arrived at her destination and parked the Vespa. After adjusting the straps on her shoulder bag and taking a moment to consult her map, she slowly walked inside the stone building where new students were gathering to pick up their class schedules.
"Bienvenudos a la Universitat de Barcelona," a student worker at the front booth said, smiling brightly. "E cual es su nombre?"
"Uh…" Kim stuttered. She had taken a crash course in Spanish in the last few months, but she wasn't quite sure that she could handle a full curriculum of classes taught in Spanish, much less hold a short conversation in Spanish. "Mi nombre es…Ki…Amanda. Sí, Amanda Harding."
Kim was handed a thick packet of papers with a sheet marked orario on the top. Kim was pretty sure that meant "schedule," but it wasn't like she could consult her dictionary now, in front of all these people (how embarrassing).
As Kim consulted her map trying to find the building listed under the first schedule entry, she heard a very comforting sound behind her – people speaking English. She brightened and turned around, figuring it'd be advantageous to befriend all the English-speakers she could find.
Kim's jaw dropped when she saw the speakers. "No, this is so not happening," she thought to herself. Then she immediately ducked for cover. She couldn't let herself be seen. This was bad. This was very bad.
Apparently Bonnie Rockwaller had decided to take a semester abroad (Kim hoped it was only that) in Barcelona, too.
----
Ron was adjusting to European life quite well. Unlike Kim, he had taken to Spanish like a naked mole rat to nacos – it was probably all those years of practically living at Bueno Nacho.
On Kim's first day of college, Ron was wandering around downtown Barcelona when he and Rufus got a whiff of something that smelled very similar to the pleasant aroma of Bueno Nacho. Ron had been Bueno Nacho-less for several months, so he giddily followed the smell down the street and into a large restaurant, where a large crowd of people were gathered in what seemed to be a humungous line.
Ron, with Rufus hanging onto Ron's cargo pant pocket, tried to evade the line to get closer to the smell. Both Ron and rat were bewildered to see a conglomerate of cameras mounted on tripods, cameramen, microphones, and ultra-bright stage lights focused on a kitchen area where a middle-aged man was cooking something that smelled delicious.
A loud buzzer sounded, and the man started fussing that he wasn't ready yet. The cameramen shifted their focus to a short, angry looking man who rushed onto the kitchen set, stuck a fork of the food that been prepared into his mouth, and immediately threw the platter into the flustered cook's face.
"This is shit! Absolute, utter shit! Get the fuck out of my kitchen!" To prove his point, the man angrily shoved all the pots and pans on the counter to the floor with a resonating clang. Off-camera, a producer chuckled and gave a thumbs-up to a director across the room.
Ron, intimidated by the yelling, started edging his way backwards when he was spotted by the angry man walking off the set.
"You, get up there!"
"But…"
Ron was dragged over to the kitchen set by one of the producers. Blinded by the bright lights, he was still dazed when the cameras started rolling and someone shouted that he had twenty minutes to cook.
Ron decided to be true to his essential Ron-ness. He shrugged and began cooking his signature soufflé. Twenty minutes later, Ron took the perfectly-cooked finished product out of the oven just as the obnoxious buzzer sounded. The angry man returned to the set, stuck his fork in the soufflé to taste it, and motioned to the producers. "He'll do."
"Huh, do what? Could someone tell me what's going on? Where's the BN snackage I've been smelling?"
The producer ignored his questions, herding him off to a nondescript van in the back of the building. As Ron was being escorted off, he heard another producer tell the impatient line of people that the audition was over.
"Audition?"
The producer smirked at him. "Yeah, you're replacing that crazy dude who failed the psychiatric evaluation. Good think Ramley finally approved of a replacement – we start filming today."
Rufus poked his head out of Ron's pocket, confused. Ron gave him an equally confused look.
After a brief pause, Ron asked, "So there was no Bueno Nacho food?"
The producer smiled. "Oh, that," she laughed. "Here, I'll get you some, just sign these papers for me." She handed Ron a fat stack of typewritten sheets and a pen before heading off into an interior room. The pleasant smells of nacos emerged as the producer brought out a large back of BN takeout.
Ron and Rufus were beside themselves with glee, but the producer kept dangling the bag just out of Ron's reach until after he finished signing the papers. Bag in hand, Ron blindly got into an unmarked minivan in the restaurant parking lot.
When Ron emerged from Bueno Nacho bliss twenty minutes later, he was being escorted into a dorm-style house enclosed by a tall fence. Immediately after he was let in, the fence gate was padlocked behind him, and cameras began filming him.
Ron had unwittingly become a contestant on the international version of Hell's Kitchen.
----
On the other side of the Atlantic, Shego made her way through Drakken's last known lair. There were no lights on anywhere. Shego muttered something under her breath about her employer being so helpless that he couldn't pay the electric bill without her.
"Yo, Dr. D., I'm ba-ack!"
Nothing.
"Ya know, Dr. D., I'm still waiting on my last paycheck. You better not say it got lost in the mail…."
Still nothing.
Shego was growing more annoyed by the second. She flexed her fingers, green plasma bursting from her hands.
Suddenly, she heard footsteps behind her…and in front of her…and to each side. Strobe lights blinded her momentarily. Shego went into attack mode, executing a roundhouse kick that cleared her way to escape.
But there were just too many of them. Shego was soon outnumbered and forced onto the floor, held down by at least three men in uniforms. A strobe light was flashed in her face.
Shego squinted upwards. "If Jack Hench sent you, get lost. Like I told you at least ten other times, the case with you all and Dr. D. and the 'borrowed' weather machine is getting settled in court. I ain't saying anything until my lawyer is around."
"What was that?" An intimidating female figure loomed down on Shego, her silhouette reflected and magnified on the lair walls.
"Betty Director," Shego hissed.
"I'll skip the niceties and cut to the chase. Where is Possible?"
"Kimmie? Your guess is as good as mine."
"Don't play dumb with me, Shego. I witnessed you two running off together a few months ago. It's obvious you're involved with her."
Shego coughed. "I don't know what you mean, and I haven't seen her since then. Like I already said, I don't know where she is."
The strobe was flashing in Shego's eyes with such intensity that shutting her eyes didn't help stop the throbbing in her head.
Dr. Director motioned to the agent beside her, who swiftly took out a syringe loaded with a colorless liquid and injected it into the back of Shego's neck. Shego was out cold instantly.
"Good work, agents. Let's grab her and get back to headquarters."
Dr. Director smiled to herself. Everything was going as planned.
A/N: That's all for now - thanks for reading! I would really appreciate general reviews/feedback/suggestions on where to take this…I don't have any more of this story written (though I've got a rough idea for the events in the next chapter, where the plot should fully kick in), so I will consider anything you suggest in reviews or PMs. So let me know what you think about:
- whether Bonnie should have a role in this story, or just a few passing mentions
- whether Dr. Drakken should return, and if so, in what capacity (for comic relief or to have a major role in the plot)
- whether other KP characters/villains should be introduced...obviously with Bonnie around, I'll probably bring in one or both of the Seniors, but not that much, since I find them somewhat annoying.
- whether Kim should lay low or turn villain (since "hero" is no longer an option)
- how Ron will fare on reality TV/cope with being filmed all the time – will he thrive, or crack under the pressure? (Don't worry…Ron will make his escape/be kicked out of the competition before too much action happens ;).)
- what's really going on with the Kim/Ron/Shego relationship triangle (Ha, I managed to write another chapter and still not directly address it! I'll have to soon…)
Be aware, though, that it might take quite a while for this story to be written and posted, but I will complete this (eventually…)!