Title: Sometimes In the Dark Place
Canon: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Charmed, and Supernatural…
Disclaimer: None of the cannons above belong to me. The song is 'I Will Follow You Into The Dark' by Death Cab for Cutie…
Characters: Buffy, Sam, Chris with Angel, Jess, Bianca, Wyatt and Dean…
Timeline: Pretty much anywhere.
Pairings: Buffy/Angel, Buffy-Dawn, Sam/Jess, Sam-Dean, Chris/Bianca, Chris-Wyatt…
Genre: Angst/Supernatural
Rating: M for Mature just in case of language…
Warnings: Spoilers for various things, lots of angst, and mentions of death.
Summary: In three worlds of the supernatural three heroes or heroines look back at what they have given and are willing to give. Songfic. B/A, S/J, C/B… J
Sometimes, the world rotates on its axis. Sometimes, a hero dies. Sometimes something bad happens. And sometimes you know it is a crime.
Sometimes, the world forgets to spin. Sometimes, the wrong people get hurt. Sometimes, you scream at the sky. And sometimes, an angel cries.
Sometimes, the world explodes inferno. Sometimes, good people die. Sometimes, the good goes bad. And sometimes, you will make them pay.
Sometimes, the world keeps on moving. Sometimes, you can hear the footsteps of Death. Sometimes, something comes from nowhere. And sometimes, you fly away.
"Sometimes Sometime"
-Goddessa39
Being a Slayer isn't all it's cracked up to be. There is pain and there is pleasure in the hunt. But if you're going to be good at anything you need to know how to balance the supernatural and the normality of the world. And don't forget knowing how to get blood and dust out of that one shirt your mother gave you right before she died. But mostly what you find peace in are the quiet nights hunting in grave yards either hand-in-hand or knowing in the most primal part of your brain that he has your back.
"Love of mine some day you will die
But I'll be close behind
I'll follow you into the dark
And when you push the sword through his gut you hear the squish of a fruit you've accidentally squeezed too hard like a stress ball. Your insides want to do the same thing and you've never done something this evil before-only you have because he used to hunt with you and you could take a kind of quiet solace because those didn't have a soul and would kill you just as soon as look at you. You killed yourself with the squishing of fruit and you wish you were bleeding to show for it. You wonder if you have a soul anymore.
She died in front of you and in your arms and its both all you ever wanted and everything you dreaded because you always knew it would happen that way. When you slept she'd always whisper that she would hope you'd be there so she wouldn't go alone.
No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white
Just our hands clasped so tight
Waiting for the hint of a spark
If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs
You meet up with her with almost no denial and you're happy to go honestly. You take her metaphysical hand and can almost make out the indentations of the basic wrinkles and can smell the dusky moonlight that is your fighter, your Valkyrie woman your brother killed in front of you. The gates of heaven are more like curtains of a stage and you float off into the abyss with her and the guilt only ebbs away with her touch.
When you were little you dreamed a lot but it never really mattered how these mattered. After two weeks straight you pull out extra salt and slip out of your bed and add a third circle of rock salt around your whole dorm and through every doorway and window just in case. But still you wake with a scream on your lips because the fire fans your hell as your are again pulled away. These scare you because even though you cannot remember the night when you were six months old you dream it as if it is happening. Only, instead of your mother it is Jess-Jess your girlfriend, your fiancé, and one day your wife; Jess the only woman you've ever loved and the only one who understand anything about you anymore. If you give in to the dreams It will have her and then you'll be nothing. And you roll over and watch her sleep because it's just a dream.
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark
You go for a hunt and itch the whole way. You say nothing to your brother about her because something inside of you thinks it will corrupt what she is to you and what she represents. You think it will turn her in to this world you're trying to leave behind. It will endanger her. You go home and find cookies and lie in bed and breathe a sigh of relief. You smell blood but it isn't until later that you recognize it. Denial has made you weak but opening your eyes to see her catch light kills you and you go with Dean to hunt. But really, you are burning in the apartment and soulless.
She isn't real and you know this. You walk in a trance slowly upstairs and all of the pictures flicker. There are skulls in the places of your friends and your mother and yourself. You cannot find her anywhere in the timeline of pictures framing the walls of the Summers girls. You do not see her anywhere. You walk up the stairs and finally come out of the trance convincing yourself not to murder her to save the world.
In Catholic school as vicious as Roman rule
I got my knuckles bruised by a lady in black
And I held my tongue as she told me
"Son fear is the heart of love"
So I never went back
You spill blood to prove She is part of you and somewhere inside something rings true. This is right and you remember a thousand problems with her as a child and try your best to forget those that have been spent without her-those clueless memories where you never had a sibling Little Sister named Dawn Marie that stole your clothes, read your diary, and exposed your secrets. First you give a speech-one a warrior would and quickly express love for Her and Him and Them. You give a word of wisdom and then you toss yourself off of the tower with no regret but that you are leaving her alone. You killed once for the world and will not do it again. You always knew though, that you would die for it, on it, and without respect you've long convinced yourself you didn't deserve.
You die in your parents' bed and its one of the most ironic things of this whole time travel shit because you can remember cuddling in bed with your brother and mother when you were young and someone had a nightmare. Your father is crying over you and you would laugh if you could because you have never seen him in the room. He's absent.
If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark
Wyatt was never absent-was always your big brother who cared for you. He is your Daddy in a way Leo never was but he is your brother because you are the only one that ever understood him. Now that you're dying to save him, your brother Wyatt, you think and hope it's changing but you dread it as well because then you are killing a part of him despite the fact that it is the most despicable part. You know every good thing that ever happened might not happen now. You turn your head again and force yourself not to look forward because YOU are dying and the next being that your are will have its own life.
Dean had always cared for you-Always without question. There were demands from Dad who had long become "Sir" and there were expectations that he behave. But never was there no one beside him. Dean stood tall and strong and flaunted his cocky self-sure smile that had all the ladies needy since he turned thirteen. You never took it for granted because in the life of the Winchesters, death was sure to come early. But you also never figured yourself as such a loser because you are walking away. But, hey, you need to get a life and hadn't meant at all to leave them like you had until your father, "Sir" gives the ultimate ultimatum that cuts Dean from you.
You and me have seen everything to see If heaven and hell decide
From Bangkok to Calgary
And the soles of your shoes are all worn down
The time for sleep is now
It's nothing to cry about
Cause we'll hold each other soon
The blackest of rooms
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs
You always knew you would die early, always knew that Dean would risk his own life one thousand times over before he even thought of wounding you. And you always knew that you would never let him if you could help it. Countless ghosts and things you've killed together as Winchesters have marked you. But Jess's death killed you too and suddenly you're not the same Sammy Dean could protect though he tries to. You don't sleep, ever. You should be exhausted. But you let your body rest and the visions start and in one way it's your own fault but you wont risk who else comes to you in dreams-the made up thoughts that ring true anyways. You go with Dean because he expects it but you lead the hunt to kill It because even though Momma was the end of Dean's normality he only had a taste. It took Jess from you and killed you both. You don't worry though because in killing it Dean's life is on the line, and you risk yourself before you let him even begin to slip away. But maybe, he'll stand up for himself without you to hold him to John.
Heaven and Hell are just pieces of grey in a dying mind, are just ways to define whatever comes after Death. Heaven and Hell are places in life too and those left behind are already changed. But sometimes, the sacrifice is worth it.
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark
Then I'll follow you into the dark"
-Death Cab For Cutie - I will follow you into the dark
End.