Divine Miss M

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People doubt me. They look at me and see a immature young girl. So I'll admit it, I look young. I've almost gotten over the injustice of it. I started looking at it like this, "at least I don't look old."

There's a certain advantage to looking young though. People will let you get away with far more trouble if you aren't considered "mature".

Being bored, as I currently was, I decided to use my beautiful young face to my advantage.

I was going to have some fun.

"MISAO!"

That was the first indication of trouble. Really I should've seen it coming.

Not that I would be discovered, mind you, but that Jiya would blame me with so little evidence. I followed the irate shout that had been my name and found him in the sitting room. Jiya liked that room because it overlooked the back garden and he found it peaceful. Maybe it was cruel of me to be straining his heart at his tender age.

Really, all I wanted was to have some fun. So I went down and there he was, standing over the tea table. I wasn't expecting Aoshi-sama to be there, that kind of made it worse.

"Morning, Jiya," I chirped.

Maybe a good mood would ward off some of the anger?

"What did you think you were doing? Where were you yesterday?"

"Hmmmm," I contemplated. I really did stop and think about it although I knew where I was yesterday. I had risen early, gone to one part of Tokyo and bought paper and ribbons… "I was home yesterday."

His face flushed in kind of a furious pink from forehead to chin. "Oh? Were you now? I recall Okon telling Omasu your room was empty when they went searching for your assistance in the kitchen."

I blinked. "Was it really? I could've sworn I was up there. I wonder where I went? What's it called when you sleep walk in the daytime?"

"It's called LYING!"

I laughed. "Sorry Jiya. I went for a walk yesterday." I shrugged and he seemed not a bit placated. Uh oh? Was I truly in a lot of trouble?

"Were you down by the desert shop in your walk yesterday?"

I tapped my chin as I thought about it. I had gone and bought pen and ribbons and then I had come home and wrote a little bit.

"You know, I don't think I was. Why? What happened at the shop?"

"They found a bunch of paper slices littered around the store."

I quirked an eyebrow. "What's a paper slice?"

His eyebrows dipped downward indicating his growing annoyance. "Little slips of paper tied to products in the store such as this one." He held up a little sheet and waved it around. "I am delicious, buy me! Advice brought to you by the Divine Miss M."

There was sort of an amazing ridiculousness to it. I mean, hearing it out loud. I laughed.

It didn't help my situation any, Jiya only loomed angrier. I spared Aoshi-sama a glance only to see he was unaffected. Well, I didn't expect anything out of him anyway.

I shrugged again. "So? There are a lot of people in Kyoto with a name that starts with M. Why am I the only person being blamed?"

"My dear, there is more."

I waited expectantly, my lips curled into a smile even though I didn't want them to. "Is there?"

"A police officer near the merchant's court was found with a little tag cleverly attached to the back of his uniform with a stickpin."

I howled with laughter. "No kidding, really? He must have loved that."

Okina cleared his throat. "Thieves beware of the Kyoto Police! Advice brought to you by the Divine Miss M."

There were police posted about because there was currently a nasty streak of burglaries plaguing that merchant area. Mostly large European imports. I had suggested we steak out the area and investigate. I was politely told to go help in the kitchen.

Okina settled himself down at the end of the table. He had more white slips. Resourceful man he was… had someone told him or had he collected these himself? I wasn't sure. I'd like to find out.

"At the docks there was a help wanted sign. Attached to that sign was another little note. 'Wussies need not apply, -The Divine Miss M.'"

I crossed my arms. "Sounds like good advice to me."

He sat forward menacingly, his palms flat on the table. "How did you get into a Gion teahouse and leave this?"

I shook my head. "I don't know. What's it say?"

"You know what it says! 'You don't really come here for the tea. –The Divine Miss M.'"

"Well I thought people went to teahouses to sit with the geisha and what has that to do with all these little notes anyway? I told you already there's lots of people in Tokyo with the letter M in their name and I wasn't anywhere near Gion yesterday."

Okina turned to Aoshi with a severe frown etched on his mouth. "Do you see how she audaciously lies to me? Where is her respect for her elders?"

Aoshi very gallantly shrugged. "I do not think she meant any true harm. Do not be too severe with punishment."

Weird.

Weirder.

And then bad.

"Punish? You can't punish me, I didn't do it! It's not fair! Aoshi-sama, how can you take his side like that? You don't really think I'd do something this absurd, do you?"

He turned his gaze up toward me and I couldn't make a thing out of it. Not happy or sad or angry or disappointed, just nothing. I had the fleeting notion that I was completely out of my league when it came to lying.

"It does have your rather unique flare to it." Casually he stood.

"I don't have a unique flare!" I protested and then rethought that. "Wait- is that an insult or a compliment?"

His clothes brushed me on his way out the door. It was the kind of casual contact that my whole day worth it sometimes. Oh, heavenly... Catching sight of Jiya glaring, I frowned.

"Poorly done, Misao," Okina continued. "The next time you wish to have your fun with Kyoto, try NOT to be seen by every Oniwabnahuu spy point in town."

I blinked.

So that's how he did it. My lips curved up into a grin. I didn't know what the spy points in Kyoto were. No wonder Jiya wouldn't release that information to me…

"I think I just sensed a challenge."

Okina's mouth curved to mirror my grin. "Oh? Well until you improve, you have kitchen duty."

My smile died.

I grumbled and schemed all the way to the kitchen.

AN: Theme: prank. Whoo. Misao can be so much fun.