Broken

"Val, wake up! You're having a nightmare!"

As I returned to the land of awakening, I could feel a hand on my face, and another on my shoulder, shaking me. I slowly opened my eyes, finding Kitty Pryde looking down on me.

"Wha? Where?" I was not quite conscious yet, so I couldn't get a full sentence out.

"You had one of your nightmares again. Fell right off the bed, claws out and everything."

I sat up suddenly, nearly head-butting her. "Did I hurt you?"

She shook her head. "Nope. I managed to calm you down before you attacked me."

I felt a few tears begin to roll down my cheeks. "I'm so sorry."

"Nah, don't be. If I was really concerned, you know I'd ask for a room change."

I hugged my knees. "Thanks Sorella. What time is it?"

"6am."

I sighed. "Alright, I'm gonna go for a run."

She nodded, getting back into her bed and waving me away.

I stood at the front door of the school, placing my headphones on my head. I turned the music right up, selecting my metal running list. Then I checked my laces and took off.

Jogging has always helped me keep what the professor called my "feral mind" under control. When I get angry, nervous, afraid or stressed, it takes over. It's strange, what happens. I only know what others have told me, because I'm basically gone. I blackout, and wake up later, in strange places. From what others have told me, I become covered in fire, a fire that seems to come from hell itself. I'm faster, smarter, stronger and more agile. I am generally all those things, but apparently when I lose control all those levels become almost supernaturally high.

As I jogged, I felt my body relax, and my mind began to clear. I ran across the campus to the edge of the forest. It was a beautiful forest, full of lush green trees and lots of places to climb. I love it because it's a place where I can be more of the cat that I am inside.

Even when my feral mind isn't in control, I'm still considered one of the feral mutants. All of my powers, except my healing ability, come from my cat physiology.

My mind clearing allowed me to think about what I knew of my mutation. The professor explained to me that there are types of mutations that follow a genetic line, only appearing every so often. He traced mine back to the earliest known records of mutants. As silly as it sounds, these records came from ancient Egypt and told of a child conceived during a ritual to Bastet and Set. When the child reached puberty, she showed signs of powers that made her catlike.

I found myself in front of the largest tree in the forest, having run without paying attention for a while. I closed my eyes, and let my claws slide out. I felt the feral try and push through, but I forced it back down deep inside me.

With one swift leap, I made it to half up the tree. Closing my eyes, I ran my hand along the bark, letting the sensations of the feel of it cause goosebumps on my arms.

I was about to continue climbing, when I smelled something strange. It was a person, definitely, but not one from the school. A moment after the smell hit my nose, a sound reached my ears. Footsteps were making their way through the forest, getting closer and closer to me.

I bounded up the rest of the tree, hiding inside all the leaves. I waited, knowing it could be a while before whoever it was entered my vision.

After a few minutes, a young man with blonde hair walked into view. Sniffing the air, I could tell he was one of the students. His scent was mixed with the scent of other students that I recognised.

Confident that he was not a threat, I slowly climbed back down the tree. When he spotted me, he jogged over.

"You must be Valerie." He commented, stopping in front of me. "I was told if I went jogging in the forest about now I'd probably find you."

"Apparently I'm very predictable. I guess I'll have to remedy that." I grinned. "Yes, I'm Valerie. Well, Valeria, technically. Most people just call me Val."

"I'm Alex. Alex Summers. I'm Scott's younger brother, and I would prefer it if you would keep being predictable, because then I'll have someone to jog with each morning."

"I guess I'll have to be predictable a while longer then."

He smiled and held out his hand to me. "It's good to meet you."

"I don't want you to be offended, but I don't shake hands. I have enhanced senses, and touching people seems to give me some serious sensory overload. I try to avoid it as much as possible."

He tucked his hand back in his pockets.

"It'll take more than that to offend me. I didn't realise just how badly some mutants have it."

I tilted my head to the side. "It's not too bad. I generally wear gloves so that I can still hold hands with someone or hug a friend. But when I'm running and climbing here in the forest I don't wear them. I like the way the trees feel."

"It is a beautiful forest." He reached out and touched the big tree. "So what do you feel when you touch the trees?"

I placed my hand beside his, taking care not to touch his skin.

"I feel every small bump, every tiny crack. I can feel little bugs moving beneath the bark. It almost feels like the tree is breathing." I pulled my hand away before it could overwhelm me.

"Um… I'll see you later." With that, I sped back to the school. I threw myself into the bathroom I shared with Kitty, collapsing on the floor.

I closed my eyes, desperately trying to get myself under control.

"No…" I whispered, feeling the feral get closer and closer to the surface. I growled, trying to force it back again.

Suddenly, it stopped. I opened my eyes.

I was still on the floor of the bathroom, and, when I checked my watch, I'd only been there for 5 minutes, so I hadn't blacked out.

Child, I have placed up a psychic block in your mind. It will only last a few days. I want you to know that you are getting better. It was only because of your nightmare that you lost control today. Ororo will check on you before bed tonight. Please still go to classes today, but take it easy.

I stood up, and grabbed my gloves off the sink, sliding them on as I walked out.

Opening the door, I came face to face with both Kitty and Alex.

"Val, you idiot. Why didn't you come to me when you lost control?" She said, poking me in the chest.

"You know I wouldn't risk anyone's safety."

Alex looked from Kitty, to me and then back.

"I know I'm new and all, but could someone please explain what's going on here? You just took off, with no explanation."

"I'm so sorry, Alex. I'm a feral. There's a part of me that takes control when I'm angry, scared, stressed or nervous. I can't always push it down, and it puts everyone around me in danger. I nearly let it out before. That's why I ran."

He was silent for a moment. "I can see why you didn't explain before you left. I also understand what it's like being out of control. It's definitely easier when you have friends around you."

He shyly took my hand. I flinched and pulled away.