AN: This was originally supposed to be a USUK fic but it turned into a Gerita about halfway through this opening—which is totally fine since they are both two of my three Hetalia OTPs. It is also my first attempt at yaoi so hopefully I didn't mess it up too much. Nation and human names used.

Pairings: Established Gerita; Established USUK/UKUS; Hints of PruCan; Hints of Swiss/Aus; Hints of Japan/Greece.

Warning: Some swearing and drinking, light yaoi (mostly just kissing and a few mentions of anatomy), light mentions of BDSM. Nothing too insane or intense.

Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia, obviously since England and Germany don't take their shirts off enough.

I also don't own the 'book' that France is reading and thank god for that—I DO NOT condone ANYTHING in that book and find it to be quite dangerous and a horrible depiction of BDSM. This story actually started out because of a conversation with a friend about how much I hated it. I am using it only as a catalyst for allowing the countries to explore the idea of BDSM, but I am confident that Germany wouldn't give any advice that would condone the practices from that story…you all know what book it is. Pretty sure that Germany and France would be like "No…not cool. Do it like this." I digress.

I love reviews and constructive criticism, try not to flame though, my singular feeling might get hurt.

The conference room door squeaked loudly as Francis pushed it open and stuck his head inside. First, and most important, was to make sure there were no errant countries hiding in the corner, or Canada sitting out in the open. Satisfied that no one was around, France slid into the room and let out a huge sigh.

'Dieu merci!' He was alone.

Relief coursed through his veins as he closed the oak door as quietly as possible. Happily making his way over to his usual seat around the large table and putting his feet up on the chair that England usually occupied, France reached into the pocket of his jacket and removed a dark covered book, opening it to the spot he had marked.

Francis wasn't exactly enjoying the novel, it was more along the lines of a 'business' read but he also found that it was very difficult for him to put down. He was never good at turning down sex, be it in person or in literary form and if he was being totally honest, he had always been a bit curious about the whole scene. BDSM was more Germany's thing than his—France was all about the romance.

Still, despite it all, he kept sneaking around reading, even going so far as to having his assistant order the next book in the trilogy. He was so engrossed in the current paragraph—handcuffs, growl!—that he failed to notice that the conference door had squeaked open again and that he had been joined by quite a few of the other countries. He didn't even notice America's breath on his ear as he bent over France's shoulder saying "What are you reading, dude? Porn? Looks like porn."

To say he jumped out of his skin would be an understatement.

"Amerique! You startled me!" France accused, in an attempt to deflect the question. Unfortunately, America's determined streak wouldn't let go and he questioned the elder nation once more. "What kind of porn? Looks dark dude. I saw something about a whip, didn't I?"

"Non," France responded quickly.

He noticed England raising his enormous eyebrows at him and tried to shove the book back in his jacket pocket. America was too quick and snatched the novel out of France's hands. The brash nation shook his blonde hair causing Nantucket to quiver as he flipped through the book and stopped on a random page. France had one lingering thought of how it was almost adorable, the way that America still mouthed the words along when he read as he did when he was young, before the Land of the Free dropped the book and stared wide at the Country of Love.

"Dude!" America gasped pushing Texas back up on his nose. "I was right, you're totally reading porn! And it's like, super dirty porn too!"

"Really Francis?" England rolled his eyes. "You couldn't wait until you were back in your hotel room or something? Are you really that deprived?"

France knew he had to recover quickly or he would never live this entire situation down. "Non, Angleterre," he attempted a smile, "I am never deprived when you are around."

"You shut your whore mouth frog!" England screeched while taking a step toward Francis. He stopped when America's hand touched his shoulder. "Don't let him rile you up Iggy, you know that's what he wants."

England took his seat and continued to glare at France while America put his chin in his hands and leaned forward asking Francis in a seemingly innocent tone, "So what's up with all the spanking and leather and whips and chains? I thought you were more about the five course meal and champagne and silk sheets."

The other nations either blushed deeply or started shifting uncomfortably in their chairs. "Spanking and leather?" England choked out. Germany made a strangled noise and muttered "Whips" under his breath while shooting a quick glance at Italy. Russia closed his eyes and let out a breath saying "Oooooh" while smiling his characteristic smile.

France knew he couldn't keep up his attempts to deflect America's line of questioning and simply sighed "Oui. I am usually all about the luxury and romance but it is always good to learn and open yourself up to new experiences mon petit Amerique."

Germany cleared his throat and began to loosen his tie "Perhaps it is time to start the meeting, ja?"

"No way man!" America chimed in, "I want to hear all about it. Sounds interesting." He turned and winked at England. The older country blushed even deeper and he managed to squeak out "Interesting?" as he stared in surprise at his younger lover.

Seizing the opportunity, France slid up next to America and placed his arm around the young blonde's shoulder, "Oui Amerique! It can be quite fun, isn't that right Allemagne?" he turned to Germany who was now unbuttoning his collar in an attempt to calm down.

"This is not an appropriate discussion for a World Summit," Germany managed with some difficulty. "Hear, hear," England chimed in.

"Well then I guess it is a good thing that the meeting has not yet come to order," France shot back at him. "Far be it for me to interfere in young Amerique's education. I wonder, Arthur if you are neglecting your duties as a lover?"

England shot to his feet and opened his mouth to scream when a small voice echoed up from the floor of the conference room.

"Ve, Doitsu?" Italy's melodic voice sounded out. The other nations looked down to see the small Italian sitting cross legged on the floor holding France's book open to the page America had been reading when he dropped the scandalous novel.

"Doitsu?" The Italian spoke again. "What is a ball gag?"

Germany slammed both hands on the table with such force, at least two water glasses were knocked over. "THIS MEETING WILL COME TO ORDER!"

AN: Again, don't condone the book. Here are some random vocab words for you.

Dieu Merci: Thank god

Amerique: America Angleterre: England Allemagne/Doitsu: Germany

Nantucket: America's unruly curl (you should know this) Texas: America's glasses (you should also know this)