He knew that he was pregnant.
An omega senses these things after all.
However, now that he was six months along, he was concerned at the size of his mid-section. It was far too small. He remembered his mother when she was six months pregnant with Ariana, and how big she got…. This was nowhere close.
The glamours prevented anyone else from knowing (aside from Dippet and the healers of course), but he was always aware of the baby, constantly moving inside of him.
It made for some awkward moments during his classes. Long pauses as his hand darted to his stomach, his hand feeling the gentle little kicks and twists of the life within him.
He knew what the healers thought…. That there was something wrong. A baby shouldn't be so small.
It must be a curse.
He just wanted it all to be over.
He wanted to judging looks to stop.
He wanted to forget that what happened between him and Grindelward.
That was a lie… he knew he would cherish the last happy memory of his Alpha for the rest of his life.
They'd only mated once.
Albus replayed that morning in his head for the millionth time, the first heat he'd actually gone through with an Alpha. They'd been having another argument, with Gellert practically demanding that Albus should join him and his cause, despite the man's role in the demise of Ariana. In the midst of the argument, after sensing that the omega was in the middle of a heat, the Alpha had pulled the omega to his feet, bent him over the chair and pushed himself inside the omega, before thrusting his hips a few times.
It all happened so fast.
Overwhelmed by the sensation of Gellert's cock pushing inside and suddenly being knotted, Albus had passed out. When he next woke up, there was a bite mark on the space between his neck and shoulder, and he was all alone.
He'd heard nothing from Gellert since then, his only updates being the news clippings that popped up almost every day regarding the dark wizard's activities.
He sank into his chair with a deep sigh, hand gently stroking over the bump. Even if the bump was relatively small, it was still difficult to get comfortable. In the blink of an eye, he'd gone from being bent over a chair to pregnant in one fell swoop.
He'd decided early on that he was going to keep it…. Him… her. At around the same time, he'd decided to keep the pregnancy a secret from Gellert. Not that the Alpha would have been any help during the pregnancy. He wasn't really the paternal type.
Not that Albus minded. He was going to be enough for this child.
….
He went into labour right at the beginning of week thirty one.
Part of him was thankful. He hadn't exactly ballooned, but walking was starting to become an issue. His clothes didn't really fit him anymore, and he was tired of being kicked and stretched from the inside.
He wanted to hold his baby…. Their baby.
For almost an entire day (thankfully on the weekend, with no classes to worry about), Albus paced his personal quarters, grunting and moaning with the contractions that gripped him. There was a pressure building inside that terrified him.
He always thought that when he did this, he would have his Alpha nearby, or his family.
Instead, he was alone.
The pain became unbearable after eleven more hours, and Albus started to wail, crying out with every contraction despite himself.
The contractions themselves were very close together now and the baby was moving around a lot more now, possibly with the glee of finally being free of his prison.
"I-I really should have gone to the Hospital Wing!" He gasped in pain, too far from any forms of communication and too in pain to conjure up a patronus that could go and get someone to help. Just as he considered trying to crawl to the sofa, there was a forceful burst from within, followed by a gush of warm water between his legs.
Despite the uncomfortableness of the water (easily dealt with by vanishing his trousers and underwear), Albus felt a sense of relief at the lack of pressure… only to cry out again at the next contraction, which was so much stronger than all the others had been.
The baby was moving down fast, it's size working to its advantage. Dropping his wand, Albus almost crumpled to the ground, forehead pressed against the ground.
He'd waited too long… the baby was coming now.
Hs legs spreading of their own accord, his hand slid in between them, wincing at the swollen flesh he found there.
He should have gone to the Healer's Wing as soon as the first contraction began, dignity be damned. The urge to push was now overwhelming.
He screamed again.
The silencing charms all around his quarters were working against him now.
Despite wanting to remain calm and composed, he knew tears were streaming down his cheeks as he was assaulted by contraction after contraction.
His omega instincts were screaming out for his Alpha.
"I-I can't do this…" he whispered to himself, another wail escaping his throat, "I-I can't do this!"
After around an hour of constant pain, Albus knew the baby was crowning as he reached back and winced at what he felt.
How did something so small, feel like a quaffle coming out?!
With another scream, the baby's head popped out fully as Albus stopped and doubled over, half squatting, half standing, prompting him to open his shaking legs as wide as he could. Pushing hard as another gush of water splattered onto the floor, Albus groaned again as he felt himself widen to unknown levels.
With another push, the baby landed on the floor.
"Albus, I was just- Oh my."
Albus turned to the doorway, still shaking as Professor Dippet's eyes widened in shock.
"…. I was wondering why you weren't at lunch."
The baby was screaming, and honestly, Albus felt like doing the same.
….
"I can't keep him can I."
It wasn't a question… it was a statement of fact.
As Dippet turned to look at him, Albus couldn't bear to meet his eyes, too focused on the baby in his arms. It was obvious that the child was going to have his red hair… it was obvious that the child was his.
"Gellert will know…" Albus continued, "… as soon as someone hears about this, Gellert will know that he's his as well. He'll take him from me."
"… So what do you want to do?"
Albus thought to himself for a few moments, before shaking his head and turning away from his friend.
"I need to find another family for him… and quickly."
…..
He met the wife half of a couple that Dippet had picked out almost three weeks later.
School sweethearts that had been married for around seven years. The girl was an ex-Hogwarts student, one that Dippet had been very fond of. Because she was looking after their first-born still, she was in the perfect position to look after a new-born.
But she didn't want Albus to just leave the baby and walk away.
"I can't!" Albus had pleaded with her, trying to remain calm, "If you take him, I can't see him again."
He knew he couldn't go through the agony of letting his son go again and again and again. It was for the best, that he just walked away.
"He needs to know who his 'mother' is." The young female omega argued gently, "It's important for him to know that."
"I can't ever see him, not unless it's in a school setting." Albus repeated, "If G- the father ever finds out that I've given him a son, he'll stop at nothing to take him and use him against me." He took a deep breath, "Please… please just take him."
Mrs Scamander scanned his face for a few seconds, before sighing. "I'll leave the door open for you…" she whispered, "… you don't have to come and see him, but I don't think you'll be able to resist."
"… Thank you." Albus didn't want to admit that she was probably right.
With Dippet as a witness, they signed the adoption paperwork, with Albus then leaving to have one last day with his son.
On his chair in his personal quarters, Albus absorbed every little detail about the baby. The red hair, the gorgeous blue eyes that were starting to have flecks of green in them. He was so small, so perfect…. Albus wasn't sure he could go through with it.
He didn't think he could give him away.
"Hello little one…." He whispered, wanting to explain the situation to his son, even if the baby would likely never remember any of this, "… I know you want to stay with me, and if your Father were anyone else, I would. But the Scamanders' can give you a life without fear, without looking over your shoulder in case… in case he comes back."
He took a deep, shuddering breath, "I love you so much…. And that's why I need to do this. The world is a cruel, dark and scary place, but happiness can be found, if one remembers to turn on the light. And the Scamanders' are that light for you. You are going to be so happy."
The baby cooed, as if he understood and approved of the decision.
For the rest of the twenty-four hours, he sat there, memorising his son until Mrs Scamander came back.
"I'll sign over my parental rights and- " Albus sighed wearily as he handed the baby over to her, only to frown when she held up a hand to stop him.
"There's no need for that…" She soothed him, "… the door is always open, remember. Do you have a name for him?"
"No, I- "
"- You think of one… please."
Albus was silent for a moment, before sighing wearily, "Newton…It's the last name of a muggle scientist I've become fairly fond of in my studies."
Mrs Scamander nodded her head politely, clearly not understanding what he was referencing, but accepting his decision anyway.
"Newton it is."
Handing his son over for the last time was the hardest thing he'd ever done. He knew he could view the memories at any time in his Pensieve, but it wouldn't be the same.
Nothing could compare to actually holding his son.
"I love you so, so much." He whispered to Newt, before taking a deep breath and handed the baby over to Mrs Scamander.
The Scamanders were going to be great parents… he had nothing to worry about.
"Thank you." Mr Scamander gave him a sympathetic smile, clearly seeing the conflict that Albus was going through.
"No, thank you…" Albus sighed, "… Newton is going to be… happy. That's all that I want."
Mrs Scamander wrapped her arms around him, waiting until he relaxed.
"Don't tell him about me, please…." Albus whispered, "… don't tell him who I am, don't tell him my name. But make sure he knows that I love him, that I will always love him."
"I really don't think you'll be able to stay away…" Mrs Scamander sighed, "… but of course I'll tell him that you loved him." She pulled away, keeping her hands on his arms, "The door is always open… if you want to see him, drop by any time."
Albus nodded, steeling himself for what was probably going to be the hardest moment of his life. "Goodbye." He sighed, already feeling his heart aching.
This feeling was probably why omegas almost never gave up their children.
"Goodbye Professor…. We'll send you some pictures, okay?"
Albus nodded silently, watching as they left.
His next step was to head to his Pensieve, taking out the last memory of his son and placing it in the Pensieve.
He would never forget Newton.