Kon is in love.
Kon is in love, in fact, with three separate people. He is in love with two's physical bodies, two's strength, two's kindness, two's stubbornness, with all three from a distance and with two up close.
Kon is in love. With all of these things, in these three very special people, and it's easiest for him to start from the beginning, so:
-xxx-
Kon's not stupid, no matter what impression you might get from his actions. After all, when he was first – not 'born', really, since he was made and then thrown away, so really it's more like waking up, but he can't help but think of it as that, as his birth – when he was first born, he had adapted immediately to being in a strange new body. Had even fooled Rukia and Ichigo into thinking that he was a regular fake soul, not a modsoul. He's not stupid.
And he wasn't, either, when he began to display his abilities. He just didn't know – think of him as a baby. He had just barely come into existence, birthed from his tedious wait for extermination, into Ichigo's body. He was free suddenly, could move and breathe and talk and eat and jump – just a nameless, innocent baby, how was he to know any better?
He laughed, he leapt, he saw them watching him, paying attention to him and it was as if the sun shone twelve times brighter than it really did, every emotion, every second vibrant. He was a presence, was real for once, and the little child he really was didn't know what to do with it.
And that, Kon has always thought, is where Ichigo's hormones stepped in (he has, of course, never dared to mention this, fearing for his life if he does). After all, what use would a modsoul on its own have for attraction to pretty girls? But in Ichigo's healthy teenage body, the urges were there, albeit never acted upon. Kon saw those girls in the classroom and it was as if a light switched on in his brain: ah. This is what I want.
And he can only assume that some part of him was ready for that, as the urge stayed once he left Ichigo's body. Maybe modsouls were already male and female inside their little pills, maybe they were preset and just waiting to have that instinct, that instinct so completely unnecessary for a soldier, awakened within them.
Maybe not. Kon didn't much care to ponder; he was more in favor of enjoying the attraction he felt, sweeping his eyes across the classroom steadily until they finally fell upon the largest pair of breasts he had ever seen (obviously, but Kon didn't doubt that they were also the largest Ichigo had ever seen, too).
He leapt straight over, gallantly introducing himself, kissing the hand of the owner of those lovely breasts, his whole body (his body!) tingling.
She blushed.
And just like that, a certain nameless escaped modsoul fell in love.
Okay, so loving a girl because she had large breasts and blushed at you wasn't exactly the stuff of romance novels. So what? Kon didn't care. He loved her, and Inoue would love him back one day, he was certain. Or, if not certain, hoping for, anyway.
And over the course of time, as they interacted more and more, Kon grew to love the teenage girl for so much more than her looks, or the fact that she had acknowledged him once. She was so kind, and innocent in a way he'd never really been, even when he had (briefly) been innocent. She was strong, too, once her powers began to grow – not a fighter, but a healer, and that was far more Kon's speed anyway. She was perfect in so many ways; any guy would be lucky to have her.
Kon wasn't angry that he never did, because no matter how he tried, he knew that he wasn't a real person in the sense that others were. After all, he had the body of a stuffed lion! Not exactly conducive to romance.
That didn't matter. Kon didn't mind. All he wanted was for her to be happy, and to someday snuggle him close in those Heavenly Mountains.
Kon was in love.
Still is.
-xxx-
Rukia – Kon had never meant to fall in love with her. Inoue had been enough for him. He didn't need any more love in his life, not of the unrequited romantic sort, anyway. But since when had Kon gotten the better deal (except when he was the only modsoul to survive out of countless others)?
So, the Kuchiki girl. He fell for her.
The first thing he knew of Rukia – other than to fear her because she was a Soul Reaper and thus likely to kill him – was that she was kind. She saved him from destruction; and if living as a stuffed lion wasn't ideal, it was far better than the alternative. Rukia was kind, and wonderful for that. He could never take this fact away, could never forget it, and that alone allowed him to love her, though not in a romantic way. Not yet.
It was only after living with her for months, sleeping with her in Ichigo's closet, talking to her, spending most of his time with her, that Kon grew to love her. She was stubborn, yes, and strange – her obsession with Chappi the Bunny, for instance, was rather disturbing. And, no, her body didn't really interest him, certainly not like Inoue's did. But she was female, did have those features, just less abundantly. And she was so smart and there with him, and she just snuck up in his affections until before he knew it, he loved his oneechan.
Yeah, and calling her that didn't help things, but sick as it might be, he could also view her as a sister, an older one looking out for him sometimes, and stomping on his head at other moments.
It was just especially certain moments – when they used to sleep in Ichigo's closet together, waking up in time to giggle at the senior Kurosaki's always-failing attempts to 'sneak-attack' his son in the morning. At night, when she would hug him close (begun three nights after he arrived, hesitant until he silently snuggled closer) and press her face into the back of his head. Her smile, bemused, as she shook her head at his antics, and her scowl when he flirted with her or Ichigo annoyed her (both of which were often).
Rukia had that something about her, unidentifiable but magical, and everyone fell in love with it, Kon included. Fell in love with her. He was in love.
Still is.
-xxx-
His last love, now that's something different. Ichigo is always different in some way or another, be it as basic as his hair or as astounding as his seemingly endless reiatsu.
Yes, Ichigo. Kon loves Ichigo.
And there are so many problems there he doesn't even know where to begin.
Firstly, and leastly, Ichigo is a guy. At least Rukia and Inoue are girls, but Ichigo is very much male and even if Kon technically doesn't have a gender when in lion form, he's pretty much always identified as male. A slight problem, as what little sexual preference (and he can't stress the little enough) Ichigo had ever shown was towards girls.
A larger problem, of course, lay in the fact that whenever Kon has a body that is actually capable of participating any sort of romantic activity, it's Ichigo's body he is in. Ichigo might be a bit weird, but not the sort of weird that would find making out with his own body appealing.
In a lot of ways, Kon thinks, he doesn't really love Ichigo in that physical type of way, anyway. There's a special place in his heart for the boy, really, one that he didn't quite notice at first, too caught up in his bursting excitement at life and breasts and everything. But that all pales eventually – not like it's not just as amazing, but it's no longer as striking, and suddenly Kon has the time to realize things.
Things like how, yes, Rukia saved him. But she did it for Ichigo. She was going to destroy him. Ichigo was the one who felt sorry for him (try as he might have to disguise it only as care for his own body). Ichigo was the one who saved his life.
Things like how Ichigo understood him from the beginning, understood and saved and named him, and yes it wasn't the cool name but it was a name and someone cared enough to give it to him. Ichigo put him in that stuffed lion, and at the time Kon was pissed that he'd been stuck in something so humiliating, but Ichigo put him in there rather than leave him floating about in the nothingness that was him when confined to his pill.
Things like how Ichigo was violent towards him. Yes, but in the way he was with his school pal Keigo, nonchalant and surface dramatic hurt and underneath the knowledge that he was being treated the same as a friend, a close long-lasting one too, no matter how ridiculous.
Things like how he just needed Ichigo. It went beyond all previous reasons, and far, far beyond any attraction or even emotion he felt for Inoue or Rukia, because it wasn't a want, it was a need, a necessity. Ichigo had somehow become the center of Kon's world, and Kon might want other things, but if something happened to Ichigo, he didn't know what he'd do and he didn't like thinking about it at all.
Yes, Kon actually does think deep emotional things like this, usually when he's flying backwards at speed towards the wall, yanked off Ichigo's face and flung across the room. However, he also thinks the shallow things he's known so goddamn well for, waving goodbye to the Soul Reapers bounding across the roof tiles under the moon and then slamming the window shut, closing the curtains and locking the door. He'll sit in front of the mirror and devour the body he's in sometimes, just taking in the sights. He'll even do things to it, things that it's not very polite to discuss among company.
Well, and did anyone expect any different? This is Kon, after all, the perpetually horny modsoul, and he's got to make use of the time he's actually got the goods to work with.
That said, he doesn't, of course, spend all his time in Ichigo's body doing that sort of thing, not even half of it. Perpetually horny he may be, but there's just something about walking around in Ichigo's handsome, human body, and (unlike Ichigo, who never notices a thing no matter how much the girls might drool) drinking in the looks he'll get, the attention.
But that's not quite the point here, is it? The point is that, really, Kon has managed to fall in love. Again.
Still is.
-xxx-
So there you have it. The whole sordid tale. And Kon's pretty much stuck, because come on, it's not like anything would ever happen. It's become clear, with the passage of time, that Inoue and Rukia are both in love with Ichigo anyway. Maybe Rukia doesn't realize it, but it's there, and Inoue definitely knows how she feels. Ichigo – he's quite honestly too busy to even think of these things, and had he been anyone else Kon would never have accepted that answer. But Ichigo has school, trying to be a successful Substitute Shinigami, a war raging on, friends and family that are starting to wonder what's going on, not to mention a Hollow in his own head, subtly rebelling every move he makes. If there's anyone who could claim being too busy, it's Ichigo, always the special one, the exception to every rule.
And while Kon wishes to hell he could 'relax' Ichigo, there's still the body issue and then the minor problem that Ichigo would probably kick him out of his body and put him into his lion form, just so he could slice Kon's head off with his big-ass sword.
Yeah, that one's never going to happen. Unrequited, all the way.
The girls though, oh, the girls – Kon feels perverted for even considering it, but when has that ever stopped him? They both love Ichigo. He sometimes wears Ichigo's body. The conclusion is rather easy to reach.
Kon is fairly certain that while they would both protest at first (and Rukia would probably hit him) the mere sight and feel of Ichigo would change their minds. Inoue's first, if he just kept quiet and just took her face in between his hands (Ichigo's hands, she'd exclaim in her head), pressed his lips (Ichigo's lips) to hers… She would give in. Rukia, as well. They both love the boy too damn much and they are both smart enough to realize that they'd never get it from the real one at this point in time. One of them will never ever get it, as Ichigo's not the type to be indecisive or cheat (or, like Kon, manage to fall in love with three people simultaneously).
That's part of why they love him, all three of them.
And, god, it's all so screwed and there's something about that Kon wants so much, just silent action, grabbing and kissing and their arms wrapped around his (Ichigo's, beloved Ichigo's) broad shoulders, breasts pressed to his chest.
But it's wrong. So very wrong, he knows he can't. And there goes his other two chances, there goes him and Oirihime Inoue or him and Kuchiki Rukia, and of course him and Kurosaki Ichigo was never even a possibility outside of his head.
No, it all comes down to this, to Kon being in love with three people, and that's it, that's all there is. Still in love, despite it all, just watching.
Still here. Kon, still in love.
Always.