Filling the gaps

For as long as have known, I have been alone. No one notices me, talks to me, or even sees me. I feel as if I am invisible to the world. Except for my friends on Facebook; WhitePuppyDog and StoicSalvation. They are the only people who notice me; who actually talk to me. And it helps... It helps a lot to know that someone cares for me... It makes my life bearable.

For once, I would like to be noticed. To have real life friends to spend time with. But first, I have to come out of the shadows. And I don't know if I am ready for that...

O~O~O~O~Please notice me!~O~O~O~O

I walked into my high school classroom with my head hung low. Why do I even bother? It's not like they'll say hi back... I slumped down into my seat with an exasperated sigh, pulling the things from my yellow bag I would need for class.

"Yah! Did you guys see Jersey Shores last night?"

"Yes! Did you see Snookie? He's so dreamy..."

"I know right? Hang on! Let me sit down. My legs are killing me!"

Umf!

"What the... Oh, Hishargy-san! I didn't even notice you. When did you get here?"

"Whatever Mina-chan come on!"

"Coming!"

That's Mina and Dianna. They are really popular in my class and, like everyone, never notice me. This isn't the first time one of them has sat on me. Do you know how it feels to get sat on? Well, let me tell you this; it isn't a pleasant experience. Would it kill them to say my name right?

I know they don't mean it though. I mean, I 'm not so impressive on the looks meter. Sigh... At least I'm not being bullied... So I guess I don't mind it so much.

"Oh, look! They're here!" yells Mina, looking out the window.

"Yah, you're right!" Dianna agrees while looking out the the window the rest of the class had gathered around.

"Hey Sesshomaru, Inuyasha! You guys are late!"

"Yah! The teachers are already here!"

"You better run!"

Sesshomaru and Inuyasha... Those two boys are the most popular kids in school. When they're around, the class seems happier. They're like the sun...

….Bright and shiny...

The boys bust through the doors like a pack of wild boars. Their long, white hair covering their faces as they tried to catch their breath. A light giggle escapes my lips as I watched them; their mannerisms are almost like a dog's! Sesshomaru raises his head first; his ocher eyes scanning the classroom before they meeting mine.

I quickly duck my head, a bright red blush lighting up my face. That was close! Our... Our eyes almost met!

"So which one won the vote?" Mina asks. What vote?

"It has to be Inuyasha! He's always bright and happy and he's got the looks of a model!"

"No! Inuyasha is all smiles! Sesshomaru has good grades and he won the city-wide kendo championships!" They had a vote?

"Mina! Who won?" Dianna calls.

"It's a tie... Someone didn't vote." Mina tells them.

"Who could it be?"

It's... It's me! Nobody asked me... What should I do? Should I just go up there and ask them? B- but... I am one the girls in this class... I want... I want to join...!

"Um... excuse me!" I call out.

"Oh well... Sesshomaru and Inuyahsa! Us girls, and the gay kid in the corner, had a vote on who was the most popular. It's a tie between the two of you!" Mina explains.

Well... I tried. I pick up my books and leave. It's not like anyone notices if I'm here or not... I creep out of the classroom as if not to disturb the chatter and make my way outside. Sigh... If I have to be invisible then I'd rather be by myself.

Usually, when I leave school early like this I go to the park and swing on the swings. It's an nice escape; to see how things are naturally. No roads, no buildings, no man-made interferences.

Back... Forth... Back... Forth

I wonder if it was this peaceful in segaku jidai...

The swing's momentum is invigorating. And soon, I am smiling. Not one of those forced smiles that are usually on my face; a true, genuine smile. I tilt my head back to catch the tailwind on my face; a wind burn flushes my face.

Slowly, my swing comes to a stop.