A/N: I normally don't write or even read tragedies but I couldn't get this one out of my head until it was down on paper. Please review! I'd love to know what you think!
It had pained Loki to look upon Ivy. From a scant seven feet away, it already felt like a world apart. He gazed at her dark hair and even darker eyes. Those eyes had been full of tears that had not yet been shed. He knew she would not cry in his presence. For the millionth time since his arrival on Midgard he contemplated how he had allowed himself to fall in love with a mortal woman. The Norns who wove the rope of fate were cruel beings indeed. They did not even have the decency to give her heart hate or even indifference towards him. It was because she loved him in return that she was so clearly in pain. Were he in a position to do so, he would have given anything to take that pain away.
She had been allowed to kiss him one last time before they put the muzzle on. Now the muzzle concealed his sneer as his gaze slid to the man beside his Ivy: the Soldier. How he hated that man. He supposed he hated all the Avengers but what he felt towards this scum was a burning fire of hate as he had never felt before. He narrowed his eyes when he saw that Ivy's hands clutched his arm as if her life depended on it. Loki's green eyes met hers once more. He didn't look away when one end of the container with the Tesseract was handed to him. He didn't look away as Thor turned the handle to activate it. He didn't look away until Midgard melted away and was replaced with Asgard.
Loki wore a mask of stoic indifference when brought before the Allfather. He did not listen as the man who was not his father chastised him. He vaguely heard something about his immediate and indefinite imprisonment. At any rate, none of it mattered. His existence was a waste of air and a waste of space. He thought of Ivy back on Midgard. He thought of how apt her name was: Ivy had wrapped herself around his heart and her roots had bored deep into his soul, holding strong. He was led out of the Throne Room and brought into his own bedroom. He supposed he was expected to be grateful to be spared from the dungeons but he would have preferred them. The bare walls would have reflected his empty heart. Guards were posted and the doors were locked. The Allfather had even had the precaution taken of having the realm's best spellcasters (Loki excepted) to place wards on the doors and windows to prevent any attempts at escape. This mattered not either; he would not even try to escape. What was the point?
That first night of being locked up in his gilded cage was when the faintest glimmer of hope sparked in him.
"Loki?" The god turned his head this way and that, trying to find the source of the voice. He would have known that voice anywhere. He moved about his room, vainly searching for his Ivy that had called his name and found nothing but his now meaningless possessions. Was this a creative attempt devised by the Allfather meant to torture him? It was succeeding.
"Loki, I don't know if you can hear me wherever you are but I needed to talk to you anyway," Ivy's disembodied voice spoke again. Loki was thoroughly bewildered.
"I feel so stupid doing this; I haven't prayed in years but I figured that now was as good a time as any."
Loki wandered over to the open window and sat on the wide stone railing of his balcony. She was praying to him. Her voice was coming from inside his head. He shut his eyes tight and imagined she was standing beside him.
"I had planned to stay in a hotel tonight seeing as my apartment was obliterated in the attack. Don't feel bad!" she added hastily, "I never liked that place anyway. But then Steve offered to let me stay at his place. He's got a really big apartment and he's not here much anyway. Thank God too because all I've done since – since you l-left..." she stopped for a moment as Loki felt an agonizing pang in his heart, "All I've done is cry and I'm a damn mess." The pain in Loki's heart eased a fraction to be replaced with hate as he realized that she was indeed staying with the Soldier. He was conflicted: should he be grateful that Ivy was being taken care of or incensed that this undeserving mortal was allowed to be near her whilst he could not?
"I don't really have much to say since you've only been gone for a few hours." Was that all? Only a few hours? Every minute away from her felt like a lifetime. "And like I said, I don't even know if you can hear me but I have to believe you're out there and that you can hear me. I love you and I'll talk to you again tomorrow."
Loki sat still as stone for a while, just picturing her smile and the way her kisses felt, wanting nothing else from the Universe but to be with her one last time.
This one-way communication went on for weeks. Loki looked forward to hearing from her every evening. She never missed a single day. She would tell him of her day (usually spent voluntarily locked up in Steve's guest bedroom and crying herself dry). She told him how she missed him and how much she loved him. She told him what she had eaten (if anything). Loki could hear the pain in her voice as she spoke to him. He did not know he could feel such pain nor so helpless. He dismissed anyone who came to see him – Thor, his mother – in favour of counting down the hours until she would pray to him again.
And then one evening changed everything.
"Hello Loki!" she sounded almost cheerful and his heart soared at the sound of the smile in her voice. He sat on his bed with his eyes closed and his head leaned back as was his custom. This had become the highlight of his existence.
"I actually came out of my room today," she told him proudly, "I also ate an entire sandwich which is the first full meal I've had in a long time. Steve seemed happy about that. He stayed home with me today. I feel bad because he's been trying so hard to talk to me and to make me smile. He's such a sweetheart."
Loki frowned, his eyes still shut.
"He said I looked too thin which is probably true. We watched TV together. Some show called Kitchen Nightmares. It was pretty good except for the fact that Chef Ramsay – he's the one who stars in the show – somehow is able to perform these family interventions and save a restaurant in a one hour show." Loki could almost hear her roll her eyes.
"Anyway, Steve enjoys it. Can you believe he's still single? He hasn't dated anyone but a girl named Peggy back in World War II!" And then she proceeded to tell him Steve Rogers' entire life story. Why was she wasting her time telling him this? Did she think he was interested in this pathetic man's history? Still, he was glad she was sounding happier so he decided to listen to her voice rather than what she was saying. She finally wished him a good night as she normally did and told him she loved him as usual. Loki fell asleep the only way he could these days – dreaming of her.
The next day went by without a sound from her. And then the next day and the day after that. Frantic with anxiety over what had happened to her, one week passed without a single hello.
Convinced something horribly wrong had happened to her, he was about to plead through his door to talk to Heimdall who would be able to tell him the news of her certain death when he heard Ivy's voice yet again. He froze with his fist raised to pound the door.
"Loki!" Her voice was strong and it sounded like she was positively beaming. He was ecstatic to hear her voice – she wasn't dead! – but he had expected to hear her sounding weak with illness. Nothing else would have kept her from praying to him.
"I'm so sorry I haven't prayed to you recently. The night after the last time I talked to you I stayed up all night and most of the next day talking to Steve. He is such an amazing man! He was telling me all about the Howling Commandos. Can you believe he asked me on a date?"
Loki's heart stopped and he dropped to his knees in front of his door. What a preposterous notion! Surely she had refused him! She would never sink so low.
"Obviously I said yes. I mean, I hadn't been out of the house in such a long time and Steve is just so wonderful so I thought 'What's the harm in two lonely people spending time together'? So I did and I am so glad..." She stopped for a moment and Loki held his breath hoping that wasn't all for the night. "Sorry, I'm back. Steve says 'hello'. He thinks me praying to you is a good thing and that it's helping me cope." Loki gritted his teeth, wishing to any powers that be that the Captain be struck down by lightning. Maybe Thor would grant him a favour. He had never been so angry in his entire existence. How could she betray him? He nearly missed her say "Goodnight, I love you," as he wallowed in his absolute misery. Why did everyone betray him? Surely he had done nothing so wrong as to deserve this? Loki walked to his balcony and thought of breaking the wards and jumping.
Several times a day he thought about ending his life but was held back every time he thought of hearing Ivy's voice again. She told him of all her dates with Steve ("He kissed me!" she had squealed as if it was her first kiss. He had run to his ensuite bathroom only to dry heave as had eaten nothing since several days ago).
For as agonizing as it was for Loki to hear all about her moving on, it killed him even more to not hear from her. Because that meant she was with him. Who knew what they were doing? He imagined that unworthy man kissing her, holding her, whispering that he loved her... making love to her? Betrayal burned and bubbled like acid up his throat. By now every furnishing in his bedroom had been smashed and desecrated in his fits of rage. By now he just felt numb. He welcomed the nothingness just as he had welcomed it when he left Asgard to end up on Midgard. He had traded one Hel for another.
A year had passed and Ivy no longer spoke to Loki in her prayers. One day, a day that Loki would never forget, Ivy spoke to him one last time.
"Loki, I'm just praying to you to say goodbye. I've held on to you for as long as I could but I know you're never coming back. I've accepted that and Steve helped show me that I still have life in me to live. I'm marrying him today and I just wanted you to know that I'm happy and that I hope you are too. Thank you."
She was getting married to another. Loki hadn't moved from his spot for days. He didn't even look up when the Allfather personally came to see him and told him his sentence was over. Did he know about Ivy? He must have, with Heimdall telling him everything. In any case it didn't matter. Nothing mattered anymore.