^Sniff^ ^Sniff^ I need a kleenex!!!

Precious

A Eva Songfic

By Sakura

Precious little angel

Take a look at what you've done

Shinji stood at the lake where he first met Kaoru. It was the sixteenth anniversary of second impact and the former angel's birthday. "Otanjoubi omedetou, Kaoru-kun, (Happy Birthday)" he said placing a bouquet of lilies into the lake. He watched as the current slowly took the flowers away. "Why did it have to be you?"

Well I thought my time was over

But it's only just begun

A tear fell from the boy's eye, unbidden as he began recalling that fateful day.

He had been standing at the lake's shore for hours, desperately trying to decide what to do about the events of the past few days. He had been considering just leaving everything behind. What stopped him though with it was the soft humming coming from his left.

Sitting on a partially submerged statue was a boy about his age with silver hair and the same red eyes as Rei. Shinji could have sworn that all the citizens of Toyko-3 had left and was about to say so when the boy began speaking to him. They exchanged a few words and shortly afterward, the boy, Kaoru, smiled. The dark haired boy felt something inside him began to melt.

Precious little angel

You're my own sweet turtledove

Won't you stay with us forever

In a bundle of love?

Kaoru was still in the testing area, getting acquainted with the Nerv staff and operations. Shinji started on his way to his customary shower then suddenly changed his mind. He wanted to wait for the mysterious Fifth Child. His mind claimed that Kaoru wasn't familiar with the layout of Nerv HQ, but the little voice deep inside his heart said otherwise.

Shinji was desperate for someone to talk to, someone his own age. He was tired of being alone. A faint blush came to his cheeks when he thought of the silver haired boy and the smile.

I was lost until you came

Precious little angel

Won't you spread your light on me

I was locked up in the darkness

Now you've come to set me free

I was covered up with sadness

I was drowned in my own tears

The dark haired boy leaned against the wall as he hooked his walkman up and let the music take him away. But it didn't work. He was able to stop thinking of Kaoru, but couldn't stop thinking about; the loss of his friends and the fact Rei was actually a clone used as part of the Evas' dummy plug system.

He hadn't seen Asuka in days since the last angel attack and he'd been avoiding the other two women in his life. The perpetual air of melancholy that seemed to surround the Eva pilot had returned. He slowly slumped down to the floor, instinctively drawing his knees to his chest.

I've been cynical and twisted

I've been bitter all these years

I was lost until you came

Shinji silently cursed his father, Nerv and Seele; all those who disregarded his own feelings and needs, throwing him away when they no longer had any need for him.

Kaoru had been the first and only person to show him any affection. He was more than willing to listen to what Shinji had to say and not once asked anything from him. Then fate had to be a b*@#& and take the only person to reach his fragile heart away from him.

And wouldn't I run a thousand miles

To be with you

"I miss you so much, Kaoru," he said not bothering to wipe away the freely falling tears now. "Why did you make me do it? I still don't understand what you told me, but you still could have lived as one of us. With me."

There wasn't a single day when the former Eva pilot hadn't thought of the silver haired angel. There were almost as many times when he wanted to join his friend and lover. "I'll go on, Kaoru, I won't let your sacrifice be in vain. But it hurts so much."

Precious little angel

Tell me how can it be true

That such a gift from heaven

Has been sent for me and you

Their last night together so many months ago was Shinji's most prized memory. It was then that he had been given love for the first time in his life. It was given freely and nothing was neither asked for nor expected in return. For the first time in his short life, the dark haired boy had felt whole and truly alive.

He broke into uncontrollable sobs, unable to bear the memory of pulling the trigger that ended the life of the being who had become his soul mate with a squeeze.

Precious little angel

Don't you worry, don't you cry

When this bad, old world has crumbled

I'll be standing at your side

"Nakanai yo (don't cry), Shinji-kun," a soft gentle voice said from behind him. A ghostly hand was gently placed on his shoulder.

Turning around, the dark haired boy was face-to-face with the translucent form of his deceased friend. "K-Kaoru-kun?!"

"I miss you too, itoshii." The ghost placed a hand on the other boy's cheek, futilely wiping at the tears. "You had to do it. I am sorry that it had to be me as well."

"Kaoru I don't think I can go back to being the way I was with my teacher." Shinji began wiping at his tear stained face.

"You have to go on, Shinji-kun. Live the life I couldn't for me if not for yourself," Kaoru said smiling sadly.

The dark haired boy nodded. "I-I'll try."

"I'll be right here waiting for you," he said placing one ghostly hand over Shinji's heart. "Aishiteru, Shinji." Then as silently and quickly, the former angel vanished.

"Kaoru! Don't go! Come back!" the dark haired boy pleaded.

"I'll be right here, waiting always so don't cry," came Kaoru's voice.

"Kaoru-kun." Shinji felt a strange warmth spread through his body stemming from his heart. Closing his eyes, he could still feel his love's presence. A tiny small, sad smile crept onto his face. "I'll try. For you, I'll try."

He could swear that somewhere, Kaoru was smiling back at him.

I was lost until you came

Several decades later, a ghostly form of a dark haired boy was standing at the now dried up lake in Tokyo-3. "I'm back," he said looking up at the statue of a woman with wings. "Sorry I'm late."

"Okaeri, Shinji-kun." Another ghostly form approached him. It was another boy the same age with silver hair and red eyes.

"Kaoru!" Shinji ran toward him and almost knocked the boy over, throwing his arms around him.

Kaoru smiled, returning the hug. "Let's go home, ne?"

Nodding, Shinji rested his head on the other's shoulder before vanishing with his lover.

~owari~