BACKGROUND: This is an "Alternative Universe" story. The basis is that
instead of the traditional Father Antonio and Gabi story, where she was
torn between two men, and he the priesthood . this story is opposite. Gabi
is committed to the church, a nun, and Antonio is dating another.
PROLOGUE: Monday, 5:45 p.m. Time stood still for a moment, as if some great force was allowing the two souls to "reacquaint" each other by first sight. And though they were strangers until this very moment, just by the way they took each other in with their eyes it seemed as if they were once lost lovers brought back together by destiny, by faith. The two beings could barely say a single word, yet their eyes spoke stories. Tales of a priceless friendship, lessons of love and forgiveness, and of a forbidden passion.
"Gabi, I'd like you to meet my brother-in-law, Ricardo's brother. This is Antonio Torres. Antonio, this is my baby sister, Gabriella Martinez."
He extended his hand to her, finally finding his voice as he spoke, "It's a pleasure to meet you, Gabriella."
She blushed, taking his welcoming hand. She would never get used to anyone calling her "Gabriella", not even when it was spoken by this man, who she surprisingly felt naturally close to. "Like wise, Antonio."
As their hands met, a blinding flash appeared before their eyes. They couldn't explain it, nor could they explain the emotions stirring within themselves when they first touched. Their eyes found each other again, wondering...
PART ONE: THE TOUCH
Tuesday, 7:15 a.m. It had been only yesterday when Gabi had first met Antonio Torres. This mysterious brother of Ricardo. But in that one day, those mere 24 hours, she felt like she knew him better than anyone else in her life. There was just something in the way those dark eyes of his watched her, something in that hint of a smile, that told her she wasn't the only one seeing deeper, feeling more that a mere greeting of two friends.
Gabi had arrived in this gorgeous beachside town just yesterday to spend this one week visiting her half sister, Paula. And suddenly, upon arrival, her respite had been turned upside down by one man. Antonio. That chiseled face. Those dark eyes. Those dimples. The hair that literally begged to be ruffled by her hands. Those eyes, so deep and dark and full of mysteries that Gabi was itching to uncover. Why did she suddenly feel so overwhelmed by this one man, such a pull of destiny?
She sat on a bench at the ocean's edge, watching the waves crash into shore. It was a gorgeous morning. Not having slept well last night, she was up at the break of dawn. Her sleep had been full of memories, and of dreams. She kept wanting to call those dreams memories of another time, because they all seemed so real. But Gabi knew it just had to be her imagination. Memories of friendship, unconditional beyond explanation. Memories of long talks, of laughter. Memories of one passionate night that was just out of grasp. Those memories haunted her, had Gabi up at the break of dawn, begging her to uncover the memories' source.
Those memories, and that look, the hidden stories, in Antonio's eyes. That haunted look. Gabi personally knew that slightly haunted look she had witnessed deep in his eyes, yesterday. Because years ago, she had seen those same haunted expressions within her own eyes, every time she had looked in a mirror. But Gabi had been lucky. She had a saving grace to vanquish the haunting memories. And she wasn't so sure Antonio had that same saving grace. Because that hollow gaze still rested deep within his eyes.
Sister Gabriella Martinez's healing grace had been the convent. After enduring endless abuse, pain and suffering at her father's careless hands, she was left in the nurturing care of the nuns at the convent. And their love had saved her. But what had been Antonio's saving grace? His haunting had been his beloved sister's death. But his saving grace? Gabi pondered on this thought. Paula said it had been Nikki, the girlfriend. But if Nikki was truly what brought Antonio out of the depths of despair after Maria's demise, then Nikki hadn't done a very good job.
Oh, Gabi wasn't trying to be judging or cruel. But somehow, Gabi saw beyond the dimpled smile, the casual arm draped around the tall, blonde Nikki that she had met yesterday. And Gabi saw something inside of Antonio that she doubted anyone else could see, or understand. She wasn't sure she even understood it herself. It was almost like there was a need, a hole, and a void that she alone was meant to fill. But exactly what the need was, Gabi was both hesitate and afraid to find out.
She had made a pact with herself last night, before crawling into bed in the guest room at Paula and Ricardo's. She convinced herself that during this week stay in Sunset Beach, Gabi was going to find out what had drawn her so instantly to Antonio. What had suddenly turned her trip from a visit with Paula, into a mission to understand her and this man? Destiny. And it was going to be uncovered.
The breezes off the ocean were picking up. Gabi's hair kept tangling around her face, and as she turned her head to allow the wind to blow through the dark strands, she caught sight of a figure jogging up the ocean. Antonio.
Her breath instantly caught inside. Why did her body react as if on auto pilot every time she saw this man? She swallowed hard, as she watched him run. He was obviously in another world, jogging amidst the froth of the surf. He was clad in a tight white tank, and loose fitting gym shorts. That shirt highlighted muscles of steel in his arms, across his chest. As he approached, she could see the pattern of his breathing in the rise and fall of his chest.
Suddenly Gabi's mind reeled back to another life. She could feel her hands on that chest, pushing aside a shirt . a black button up shirt. His skin was hot, the air stifling and smothering. She could literally feel the beat of his heart, fast and furious, under her hand.
As Antonio slowed his run, he saw the image of the young woman he had met the day before. Paula's half sister. Sister Gabriella Martinez, was sitting on the beachside bench ahead. A part of him wanted to continue to run, pretend he had not seen her. But he knew he couldn't. Yesterday had hit him hard. There was something in her eyes, in her touch that literally sucked him in. It was an amazing physical and emotional connection that he knew shouldn't be there. He knew it, yet that knowledge didn't stop that undeniable connection. She was a nun. A Sister! Promised to God. And he was attached to Nikki. The girl that had saved him, partially, from his dark demise after Maria had died.
He stopped his run and half jogged, half casually strode to stand beside the bench where Gabi sat, and Antonio tried to catch his breath. But suddenly it wasn't physical exertion that had him struggling to breathe, but those flashes of blinding memories from their meeting the day before that had him struggling. Flashes of memories just out of mind's reach.
"Gabriella," he nodded, still breathless.
Gabi looked up, shaken out of her dream. He stood before her, the sun highlighting his silhouette against the sky. Sweat glistened across his shoulders. Gabi could taste the sweat on her tongue.
How? What was happening to her? Gabi licked her lips in an effort to gain control.
"Antonio," but it came out a hoarse whisper. More of a passionate cry for help than a friendly greeting.
The tension between the two in this moment was beyond description. Antonio could literally feel Gabi breathing, struggling. And he was having a hard time grasping concepts. He should've been asking her how she was. Small talk. Discussing Paula and Ricardo. Their upcoming dinner party. Anything. Instead, all he could do was stare at her, fixated on those eyes . that face. That delicate body.
She was dressed as no nun he had ever seen before, clad in casual denim shorts and a pink tank top that matched the flush on her cheeks. Her black hair was loose, brushing past her shoulders and floating on the morning breeze. It kept tangling around her dark eyes, brushing past her lips.
Those lips. His heart leapt, his mind conjuring up images, tastes. He had tasted those lips somewhere, in a dark, smothering place. He had tasted those lips hungrily, as if there was no tomorrow. It was a taste so real, he couldn't look away.
There was just something about her . an allure, her down to earth demeanor, her eyes, that had him thinking he knew her from somewhere. No, sometime far away. Someplace so special he wanted to go back there. He kept seeing images of her, in another life time, flashing before his eyes. Images of passion that were beginning to disturb him. Those images had him wanting to reach out and touch her, skim those lips, to see if that taste in his mind was real.
But he couldn't. God, what was he thinking? Why was his mind going there? This was a nun. A nun! And he was dating Nikki. He tried desperately to seek images of Nikki in his mind, to bring about the taste of her lips when they kissed. But all he could taste, all he could feel was this heavenly woman sitting on the bench. Gabi. It was as if it had always been Gabi. As if it would always be.
"Gabi ." he muttered again, a whisper.
She had to get a grasp on reality, she told herself. Carry on a conversation. Stop whatever was happening between the duo, before it went too far. "How . how are you today?" It came out a forced squeak, and she cringed inwardly.
Antonio continued to stare helplessly at those lips. He wanted to say he was dying to kiss her, to taste her, to see if the memories were real. He wanted to say he had been haunted all night of passionate, forbidden dreams. Dreams of her walking into his bedroom. Dreams of her touching his chest. Dreams of her kissing him insistently. Instead, "Fine."
Gabi rose off of the bench. She had to move, to look away from this man. Talk. Walk. Something. "Would you care to join me for a walk?"
He watched her erratic breathing. She was definitely feeling the connection too. "Yes."
But Gabi thought that yes sounded like a yes of passion, of giving in to love instead of a simple agreement to take a walk. So she refused, at first, to meet his eyes as they strode casually along the water's edge.
So she decided to ask the first thing that popped up in her mind. "Since when did you decide to go jogging in place of surfing?"
Antonio hesitated, studying her face. "How did you know I surf?"
Fate.
Gabi broke stride momentarily, as her mind reeled. How, indeed. But she replied, "Paula must've told me." But somehow, both knew Paula had said no such thing. And as they walked on, the waves lapping at the shore, the gulls calling overhead, the sun rising higher on the horizon, they talked. And shared. About life, surfing, Maria, Ricardo. About Sunset Beach, the ocean, and their histories. About Gabi joining the convent, her father and his abuse. About Antonio's reasons for loving Nikki.
Somehow, in that one morning of conversations, as they talked, it seemed as if they were rehashing old times, sharing memories as opposed to acquainting the other with their life histories. Antonio recalled Gabi's pain, when she shared her father's abuse. Yes, there was pain there today as she discussed it. But . his heart told him he had lived this before. And that was what scared him so much, the memory of her. Of Gabriella Martinez.
The conversation slowly turned from the two of them to Ricardo and Paula's small dinner party that evening. Actually, the dinner was just for them, to welcome Gabi to Sunset Beach. Ricardo was at work today, at the Police Station. Paula had taken the week on vacation to spend time with her half sister. And tonight Paula had insisted on giving Gabi a proper welcome. Paula, Ricardo, Gabi, Antonio, and his date.
Gabi wasn't the jealous type, but she hated the thought of Antonio bringing Nikki to the dinner party tonight. Somehow Gabi felt it could be special, could be destiny, without Nikki. Gabi sensed that Nikki would interfere. But Gabi was just being jealous. She was not the jealous type, nor had Gabi ever imagined being jealous of what Nikki had. But, despite not wanting to be, she was. Nikki had this man. Antonio. She had his touch, his kiss, and his life. And a piece of Gabi's heart said it should've been hers. Even though she knew it wasn't right or true, she couldn't convince her heart of that, after meeting Antonio.
Their long walk along the beach had eventually taken Gabi back to Paula and Ricardo's home along the beach. So Gabi went to make her casual goodbye. And to ask her quiet inquiry, hoping Nikki wouldn't be coming tonight. "What time will you and Nikki be arriving tonight?"
"Probably about 7:30. Nikki's shift at the hospital ends at 7:00, and she was planning on coming by to pick me up. Since I live much closer to Ricardo's, it would be simpler than me going all the way out to the hospital to meet her, then driving all the way over."
Gabi merely nodded her agreement. But her heart was begging for Nikki not to come. Her mind kept telling her heart to get back to reality. "Then I will look forward to seeing you tonight." She turned to go, but was hesitant.
As was Antonio to let her go. "Gabi ."
"Yes?" It was breathless, waiting.
"Thank you. Thank you for the walk."
She nodded, staring intently into his face. Gabi was dying to reach out and touch him before he left. To see if the memories in her mind were as real as they felt. Reality had her hesitating. But soon her body took over. He was simply standing there too, watching the battle on her face. He knew she was trying to decide something. Trying to see if her heart or mind would win out. And as her hand, tiny and delicate, reached out to touch him, he couldn't help but smile ever so slightly, a dimple showing. Her body and soul won out. She was feeling the connection just as much as he. The destiny that breathed its own life between them.
And she gently brushed her hand on his shoulder. His skin was hot from the morning sun, burning under her touch. Their eyes met, and without explanation or understanding time stood still and shifted. Flashes of memories that weren't really there danced between this forever forbidden duo. The memories played out too fast to grasp and hold. Except the concept of unconditional love, of a friendship beyond comprehension. And time paused just long enough for Sister Gabriella Martinez and Antonio Torres to glimpse a memory of a lifetime ago . of the two of them on another beach somewhere, Antonio jogging up out of the water, rubbing his damp hair with a towel, Gabi staring as she stood in the sand, slowing from her own jog. Staring, wanting, needing. And another memory of her touching his shoulder. A boat, abandoned. Trapped and locked. His shoulder. This shirt. She remembered the feel of his skin. The heat. His body reverberated with the power of her touch, so delicate and caressing. And the connection they felt in the memory and in the moment now had them both gazing in wonder at one another.
PART TWO: THE KISS
Tuesday, 6:50 p.m. She could still feel the burning heat of Antonio's skin beneath her touch. Her mind still reeled with blinding images of the destiny between this man and herself. Destiny that she was no where near to understanding or comprehending. As much as Sister Gabi tried to pry her mind from this man, this power he held over her, it was to no avail. Why did she suddenly feel so overwhelmed by this one man, such a pull of destiny? Gabi had to get a grip, get back to reality. But she knew this would be impossible until she uncovered the destiny that weighed between this mysterious Antonio Torres and herself.
Gabi stood cutting the tomatoes for the salad, inside Paula's kitchen. Ricardo had just gotten home from the police station and was in the shower getting ready for the dinner party. Gabi had to keep her mind off Antonio, onto her cooking duties. But she also knew Antonio would be arriving soon. His presence, his tempting body, those dimples, those drowning eyes would soon swallow everything inside the loft. And if Gabi was going to get under control, it was now or never.
And she made the decision, without realizing it, that it would be never. There was so much inside Antonio, in what drew her to him, that Gabi was determined to figure out. She had been debating on whether or not to bring up the subject of Antonio to Paula or not. After her encounter this morning with Antonio on the beach, Gabi had spent a lot of time thinking. Even if she couldn't explain it, there was something drawing her to this man. This tall, dark, sculptured soul that cried out to her. Passion. Desire! Or friendship, beyond description? Fate? Destiny? Whatever reason it was, Gabi was now more determined than ever to delve into it.
Gabi couldn't help but smile at the obvious love that Ricardo and Paula shared. It was in their gazes, their secret smiles. Her mouth twitched briefly. She was happy for her half sister, but the tiniest piece of her heart was jealous today. The dark recesses of her heart questioned what it would be like to share that secret smile, to know that kind of love that only two could share. What would that be like with Antonio? She knew, despite what Paula had told her, that Antonio and Nikki didn't share that same depth of caring. But could he share it with her? There was no point in answering that question. No reason to go there. Gabi was committed to the church, Antonio to Nikki. That was what she should've been concentrating on. But her mind kept playing back those images. The feel of Antonio hidden in her mind, and somehow his taste and those lips were coming to mind. The taste .
"Nikki makes Antonio happy?" Gabi queried, trying to get her mind off the taste. She dropped the neatly sliced pieces of the last tomato in the salad, and stirred methodically.
Paula's eyebrow rose in question, at the suddenness of Gabi's statement but she answered. "Yes. He seems really happy with her."
But not happy enough. Not loved with the kind of love that crushes your heart, with the fire that burns inside, Gabi thought. The love that makes your heart ache with the need to be with that person, the love that cries out with passion and touches and something as simple as friendship. Because if Antonio shared that kind of love with Nikki, that depth of caring, it would be evident in everything he did, in every word he spoke of her. But it wasn't there.
Gabi opened her mouth to ask Paula more, but the phone rang. Paula quickly answered it, and as Gabi casually stirred the salad, only caught this end of the conversation. "Hello?" Pause. "Oh no. We'll all miss you." Pause. "I'm sorry." Pause. "I'll send Gabi right over, my hands are full with my special sauce for the spaghetti." Pause. "Don't worry, I'll save you a plate." Pause. "Don't work too hard. Bye."
As she hung up, Gabi asked, "What was that all about?"
"It was Nikki," Paula sighed. "An emergency came up at the hospital, and since one of the nurses called in sick tonight, Nikki's going to have to stay until 11:00 to help out."
Gabi's heart leapt a tiny bit. Even though she knew she shouldn't feel happy about Nikki not being able to make the dinner party, Gabi was glad. She knew it was terribly wrong of her, but that didn't stop Gabi's heart from beating and desiring time with Antonio. He would be much more apt to feeling the connection and destiny that Gabi felt, without Nikki hovering over. Gabi couldn't help the piece of her heart that was jealous of Nikki, and what she had. Even if it was wrong, Gabi wanted to discover where all these memories she was having about Antonio, this instant connection, was leading. There was something beyond what her eyes could see. There was something only their hearts could understand.
Gabi shook herself from her thoughts, as Paula continued. "Nikki tried calling Antonio, but couldn't get an answer. So since she wouldn't be by the phone most of the evening, she was wondering if we could go tell Antonio. And since he just lives up the way, I thought you could run up and tell him, bring him on down to the party since he won't have to wait on Nikki."
Gabi nodded. Suddenly she was nervous. It was one thing to secretly be jealous of Nikki and Antonio, one thing to secretly remember and desire those hidden thoughts of Antonio. But it was another to walk into his home, to enter such a personal area of his life and be exposed to him. And suddenly Gabi was frightened of all that she might uncover, of herself and her feelings for this man.
But she left to get Antonio, nonetheless. And took the walk along the beach to get there, to calm her thoughts and erase the voices of destiny from her mind.
It didn't work.
Antonio sat on his couch, trying to erase the memories of this nun, Sister Gabriella Martinez from his mind. But it wasn't working. He had dreamed of her taste, her tiny hands on his body all last night. And, as much as he hated to admit it, all this afternoon as well. The brief meeting this morning, her touch on his torso, had him flashing hot, his body responding to something he couldn't understand.
But tonight he was going to be with Nikki. Tonight, Nikki would distract him from this sinful draw he felt toward the Sister. Or so he thought. So he planned.
As Gabi approached Antonio's house, in the dusk hour, she noticed very few lights on inside. She knocked nervously on the door, and ran her hand over the front of her dress. She had changed into a simple sundress this evening. Pale yellow, with spaghetti straps, and tiny flowers gracing the bodice. Suddenly she wondered what Antonio would think of her dress? Of her coming to his house? When she got up the nerve to tell him about her dreams, her memories, what would he think? But somehow, Gabi thought he was sharing those memories too. Thought? She knew he was. It was in his eyes, his touch.
She knocked again, and this time heard his voice calling from inside. "The door is open."
She gently turned the knob and eased the door open. As she took a step inside, Antonio's shadowed figure quickly shoved the door closed behind her. He enveloped her in his arms, pulling her into the dark depths of the house. Gabi gasped at the strength of his body pressed against hers, the powerful heat emanating from him, the sheer memory of his body on hers. His muscles were taught, his body hard. But just as she gasped for air, his mouth covered hers in a kiss, taking away her breath. It more than took her breath away. It sucked the life from her. It fed her life. And they fell onto the couch, Antonio pressing Gabi into the soft cushions below.
His lips were hot, demanding, hungry. He tasted like the edges of her memories. Tasted like life, love and forgiveness. And Gabi couldn't help but melt into him. She didn't want to stop. Her hands were instantly on his body, across the tautness his back, touching his neck. Her fingers caressed his hair, that hair she had yearned to run her fingers through before. And she sighed into him. She breathed her life, her love, her need into this one kiss, this one man. Her body molded itself against his crushing strength. It felt like . home.
Home. That was the one word that reverberated into Gabi's conscience thought. Fate. Destiny. Home. She never once thought about the immorality of this moment. Just destiny.
Blinding flashes of memory . of dying kisses full of never-ending love. Of Antonio pressing her into the cushions of a couch, on the floor. Smothering air. Wet kisses. Passion beyond the moment. Sharing at last. Blinding flashes.
And now, she kissed him back. Opened her heart, body, mind to this moment. Even though later, she knew she would berate herself for being weak. At this moment, all she knew was the taste, the feel, the fulfillment of memories. "Antonio ." she whispered against his lips.
And he pulled away, opening his heavy lidded eyes. Even before he focused on the woman beneath him, he knew this was Gabi. Not Nikki. Not the woman he had planned on surprising, the woman he had expected at his door. He probably knew this was the gorgeous Gabi the second his lips tasted hers, because she was his memory. She tasted like his dream. But he didn't want to let go. And admitting it was Gabi he was kissing, holding, loving, would mean it was time to let go.
But reality was quickly setting in. He was lying on top of a nun. Gabi. A nun! He had kissed her with a passion he was supposed to reserve for Nikki. But it was a passion, a fulfillment he had yet to feel with her. Only with Gabriella Maritnez. Only.
"Gabi ." he whispered, trying to push himself up. Off of her soft body. Away from the responses he was feeling toward this woman, the memories that were fast becoming a reality. "I'm sorry . I ."
But she put a finger to his lips to quiet his protests. His dark eyes were clouded with the passion she felt from the kiss. And as she brushed her finger over his lips, their eyes carried those flashes of blinding memories. It was another day, a dark evening, and he walked in the door, she kissed him. The accidental kiss. The taste of love. The realization of true feelings for one another.
Was that a lifetime ago? Or today? Antonio shook his head free of the thought, and climbed off of Gabi. As she tried to quite the thoughts in her heart, she sat up.
"I'm sorry, Gabriella." His voice was low, hoarse. "I . I thought you were Nikki. I mean, she was going to pick me up, and I thought .."
Gabi licked her lip, watching his obvious discomfort. "I know." She sighed heavy hearted.
He looked down at her, sitting so demurely on his couch. That sundress gracing her curves, her skin glowing. Her lips were flushed from his kiss. And his heart wouldn't stop pounding. His mind wouldn't stop racing from her taste. It was as he dreamed. It wasn't a dream. This taste, this connection, those memories were somehow real. And it frightened the hell out of him.
"Nikki called," Gabi was trying to explain her reason for being in his house. On his couch. Under him as he kissed her. Why she wanted him to kiss her. "She won't be making it this evening. There was . an emergency at the hospital and she is having to cover another nurse's shift."
Antonio only nodded. He needed to get away from this place, this woman, being alone. "We ought to get to Ricardo's. Don't want to keep my big brother waiting." And with that, he turned to go.
"Antonio, wait." Gabi pleaded, standing and reaching for his arm. He stared down at her touch. So blindingly full of those haunting memories.
"Shouldn't we ." she hesitated. "Talk about this?" But what she wanted to say was . See what all this means? Shouldn't we try to grasp why we feel, what we feel? Understand this destiny? Shouldn't we see where this leads? Kiss? Touch? Love?
But she knew they couldn't. She knew it was totally wrong for her, a nun, to be even considering understanding where all of those feelings were coming from.
"Gabi ." he paused. "It was an accident. I don't think-"
But she wouldn't let it end at that. Gabi had made a pact with herself to uncover what was going on inside of her, why both of them were seeing this past between them. "No!" She gripped his arm harder. "Look at me."
And when he did, she saw the fear of the unknown there in his eyes. The pleading look to leave it alone. But she just couldn't. Because they both deserved to understand. "Antonio . Please tell me you have been sensing what I am. Please tell me you feel this connection ."
"It doesn't matter what we feel," he tried to be sane. "It doesn't matter what is there. It can't be. It cannot be there. You are a nun. I am committed to Nikki."
Gabi's eyes begged him to understand. "Please. I know that. But, I . have to know."
His eyes told her the truth. She saw the connection, she saw the passion, the blinding memories dancing there. They both knew it. They had both felt it in their initial meeting, and on the beach this morning. And it blazed beyond denial in their kiss. And the both knew they couldn't ignore it forever.
But he said, "You already know the truth." And turned to walk out the door.
Gabi's heart leapt, skipped a beat. Destiny. And she followed him out the door to Ricardo's. Destiny. The thought kept ringing in her mind. And in her heart, she kept playing back the kiss. That kiss was opening a porthole into another dimension for her. And tonight, Gabi was going to find out what was on the other side.
PART THREE: THE LOVE
Tuesday, 8:17p.m. "Come on, T, dance with the Sister," Ricardo urged his little brother. Antonio wanted to pretend that he hadn't heard his brother's request. He actually wanted to pretend Gabriella Martinez wasn't even in the room. But that was impossible. He couldn't miss her presence, her appeal, and the taste of that kiss on his mind. That had been a mistake, his mind kept berating. But it had felt oh so right. His arms around her, her soft curves against him, those sweet lips on his, her hands in his hair. It had been a dream. Heaven. And now he had to, needed to, put this snowballing attraction behind him.
No. There was no way he could dance with Gabriella. No way.
"T?" Ricardo paused in his dance with Paula. "Come on ."
Gabi, who up to this point had been sitting demurely on the sofa, rose, waiving Ricardo's request off. "There is no need. I ." But before she could continue, Ricardo pulled her over to where Antonio stood, stiffly.
She rolled her eyes in defeat. "Is he always this demanding?" Gabi teased Paula.
"Only when it involves his family, work, or friends!"
Everyone got a laugh out of that, and Gabi and Antonio gave in to Ricardo's request to dance. Gabi was hesitant at first, not sure where to touch Antonio or even how she would react when she did touch him. He had been avoiding her fairly well after their kiss. Not a word was spoken between the duo on the walk up the beach to the loft. And only cordial, small talk had occurred between them during the dinner party. Enough so that Paula and Ricardo weren't in the least bit suspicious. But Gabi was. Something had happened. And it was more than a kiss. More than an accident. And Antonio knew it too.
Licking his lips nervously, Antonio gently laid a hand on Gabi's tiny waist and took her hand in his other. She was so soft, so warm. So tiny. He swallowed hard. Gabi looked expectantly at him as he pulled her closer to dance. The music was sultry and slow. A part of Gabi wished for the radio DJ to quickly pick a fast paced song so that this pull would end. But she also knew that the pull, the destiny would never leave. Slow song or not.
She sighed slightly, settling into the feel of dancing in Antonio's arms. Her body fit perfectly against his, every crevice and curve had a home on his muscled planes. For how long they held each other, breathing the same breaths, moving in complete unision, neither knew. Suddenly the casual dance between friends that Ricardo had encouraged had become a dance between lovers of a life past. An awakening of passion and an understanding of their need to love and be loved by the other.
Gabi's eyes met Antonio's and they shared more than the moment. Shared memories of a dance ages ago in a festive atmosphere . a party. A dance that held the first knowledge of love. And another dance, a dance out of neccisity that reawakened what should have been dead, but would never die between this forbidden duo.
And as those flashes played between their bodies, Gabi backed away, her eyes still locked with Antonio's. For the first time, she was truly not afraid of what was between them. She understood and knew the destiny there. It was undescribable, completely unbelievable. But she knew that before the week would end, this man was her destiny.
And Antonio knew it too. He turned to his brother. "Ricardo, if you don't mind, I'll cut out now. It has been a long day."
Ricardo was too busy mesmerized in his wife's presence to grasp the tension between Gabi and his little brother. That was a good thing. "Sure, T."
Gabi was torn between staying behind and walking Antonio out. The fulfillment of this fate demanded she follow him. Her sanity and the safe habors inside said to stay. But the pull of her heart, the tug within that wouldn't be denied had her speaking up. "I'll walk Antonio out." And she followed, fatefully, Antonio out of the loft.
"Gabi ." he paused on the porch, his eyes studying the patterns of the stars as they appeared in the night sky.
"Antonio, we ."
But neither knew exactly what to say. It was there, stretched out before them just as sure as the ocean waves that crashed in the distance, just as far reaching as the expanse of night overhead. But neither knew what to say. Or what to do.
"Gabi, we can't do this." Antonio finally spoke up. His heart was heavy, busting. This pull inside was just too strong. This past too heavy to let go. But he could not allow himself to fulfill this destiny either.
"Can't do what?"
Antonio gently grabbed Gabi's hand, touched the delicate skin, and pulled her on a walk along the ocean's edge with him, to the safe haven under the pier. "This." He motioned with his free arm, tugged her hand with his other. "This." He took a small step toward her and she gasped lightly at the warmth emanating from him. It was happening.
"Gabriella, we can't allow this to happen."
She looked away, out to the ocean waves mingling with the dark sky. It was hard to tell where one ended and the other began. And it was just as difficult for Gabi to grasp the concepts of where reality ended and this destiny began. Or were they to end the same?
Her heart sat heavy in her chest, the ache of a sob buried deep within. She knew she should, rationally, be denying this love that was pulling her to Antonio. She was a nun. She barely knew him. He was dating another woman. She was a nun! But not a single one of those thoughts could shake what was in her heart, what was to be their destiny.
"Can't allow it? Or won't? Antonio, don't you feel this . history? Can you feel it?" She clasped her fingers around his, gently tugged his hand to rest above her heart.
He swallowed hard, trying to be noble, to do the right thing. "Gabriella . you and I both know we can't pretend this . this isn't sitting between us. I can't begin to explain it or even justify it, but I feel it just as you do. But we cannot act on it."
"Even if it is destiny?" It was now or never. Time to cross that line, to reach the other side, to see what was there, beyond the next dimension. It was to be.
And with that Gabi ran her free hand up Antonio's arm, grazing the skin beneath her touch, smoothing over the cotton of his button down shirt. She traced the pattern of his lips. Those lips. She would forever dream of those lips, the love they so freely gave. And she took another step closer to him. By now, their bodies were mere inches apart. The heat of his burned her skin through the sundress. His breathing was just as erratic as hers. And the moment she raised her eyes to meet Antonio's smoldering gaze, fate stepped in. There was nothing either member of this forever forbidden duo could do. It had always meant to be, it would forever be meant between the two.
Neither knew who made the first move. But somehow they were kissing. Not a playful, testing kiss. But a kiss, as if they were sharing their last breaths. A kiss of passions buried for decades, centuries, lifetimes, universes. A kiss that would forever bound the two.
Although neither spoke a word, as they pulled apart, stared into each other's eyes, they knew. Knew of all that was to come, all that should have been before. All that should forever be. Destiny. And drifting on the breeze, the memories of a voice, "Gabi . what are we doing?" And without the conscience knowledge, both muttered, as their lips met again, "I know what I am doing.."
Somehow, they were tumbling on the sand, the pounding of the surf slow and methodical compared to the breathless beatings of their hearts. Gabi was gasping for air, struggling with the buttons on Antonio's shirt. Then she tasted his chest, his neck. Salt. Sweat. The tastes of memory and reality mingling into one. Flashes of the only thing that could be . love. And Antonio was behind her, tugging at the straps of her dress, his lips grazing, tasting, relishing her body. Her head lulled in the release she felt, the power of his kiss, those magical hands. Completion of destiny. Forever love. What could never have been before was here now.
"Antonioooo," she whispered, her eyes hovering half open. He smiled, ran a hand over her face, touched her lips, brushed her hair out of her face. And with the gentleness only Antonio could possess, he laid her down on the sand. Memories of grainy couch cushions, dank air, smothering and dark, but of the ultimate love filtered between them.
And he lowered himself to her, kissed her, took her, made this beautiful angel beneath him his own, if only for the hour. Neither Antonio Torres or this Sister Gabriella Martinez could ever explain where this love came from. Neither even cared at this moment. They only cared for the fulfillment, the fate, the love that flowed. It was the completion of their destinies.
"I don't know how much longer we have here. But there is one thing that will never die. I love you, Gabi. And I always will, no matter what." Those softly spoken words floated from another life, on the ocean breeze, crashing down with the force of destiny on the forbidden duo.
They could have felt remorse, torturing their souls. They could have felt shame for what society would say shouldn't be. But they didn't. All they felt was the love of another lifetime coming to fulfillment. The needs, what had always been meant to be.
Gabi instinctively snuggled her face into Antonio's neck. "I love you," she whispered. But he already knew. It had been there all along.
"I love you, Gabi. And I always will ." and he highlighted their newfound declarations of love with a kiss.
And in the distance, a faint voice. Ricardo's voice. "Gabi? T? You out here?"
PART FOUR: THE LIFE
Wednesday, 10:33 a.m. Gabi's bags were packed. Her mind was set, her heart afire . waiting. She stood outside Antonio's house, taking slow deep breaths. Her future, her life, destiny awaited in the next few moments. After hearing Ricardo and Paula calling for her last night, she and Antonio had quickly dressed and managed to steer clear of Ricardo and Paula. But Antonio had withdrawn inside himself, muttering something about sinning for a second time. In a second life. And he had told her to forget what had happened, and he'd went back to his home.
But Gabi could never forget what had happened. The moment Antonio had disappereaed, Paula found her under the pier. And there was no following, searching, begging Antonio to understand. Paula was observant. She knew something was going on. Especially this morning as Gabi huridly packed her bags and left. As much as Paula demanded an answer for Gabi's hasty retreat, Gabi wouldn't give her one. She had to see Antonio. Only Antonio.
And Antonio's answer would be her future decision. If he could still admit he loved her today, want the fulfillment of their lives and destinies, then she would be the happiest girl in Sunset Beach. Her soul would have its completion. But if he said it could never be, she would respect his wishes and return to the convent and her passionless, loveless life. It was all in Antonio's hands now.
She knocked nervously on the door. What would Antonio be thinking this morning? After he had slept and had time to think about their actions? Their love? Would he deny it all? Go back to his life with Nikki? Or would he admit to what his soul demanded? Gabi was sick with nerves, with the need to know.
The door opened, and Antonio's face greeted the morning. He looked like heaven, standing barefoot and bare chested in black boxers at the door. His hair was rumpled, his eyes tired. But she could still see the love, the need buried within those eyes. Gabi's heart skipped a beat with hope. "Gabriella."
"Antonio. We need to talk." It was a breathless whisper, of hope and passion. Her eyes searched Antonio's face for answers. But she found none.
Antonio stepped aside and allowed Gabi to enter his house. His eyes were all over her this morning, just as his hands and lips had been the night before. She grew more lovely every time he saw her. Today she wore a cream miniskirt and a halter top in shades of cream, pink, lavendar, and blues. But it was what was written in those eyes that called out to him, drew him into her. It was the unconditional love he saw written there.
Maybe Antonio hadn't reacted properly last night, after hearing Ricardo calling for them. But regret from a lifetime before had filled his soul. Sins of another life, that he had allowed himself to feel shame for, had haunted him. But shame was only what he made of it. Shame was there because he had allowed it a lifetime ago, when Father Antonio had sinned against his commitment. Now, he could say he had sinned again against God because of Sister Gabriella's commitment. But he could also say he had fulfilled destiny. Completed the love. Made what should have been then, complete now.
Nikki had come by after her late shift. But Antonio had feigned being tired, begged her to come back another day. He had to think, had to grasp the truth of what had happened. Yes, he and Gabi had made love. They had given in to desires of the flesh, of this earth. But he and she both knew it went so far beyond that. What they shared, what their souls cried out for was on another plane of life. It was destiny.
"Antonio. I have to ask you a question." She rang her hands nervously, her heart beating loud enough she was sure he could hear it.
"Yes?"
"Did you mean what you said last night? Do you still love me?" It came out a breathless whisper. In her hearts memory, she knew she has asked this question one too many times in another life. But she would only ask it this once. Once more.
He had made his decision last night. Admist the hours of sleepless dark, his heart demanding answers. His mind crying out for reality. And he had finally made a decision both his heart, his destiny, his mind and soul could live with.
"Do I love you? Will I always love you? No matter what?"
"Yes." It was a whisper, barely audible above the pounding of their hearts. Gabi's eyes were full of unshed tears, her heart tearing, dying to know the truth.
"You already know the answer to that," he whispered, stepping closer to Gabi.
"Say it, please," she begged, her hand resting on his chest, touching the path where her lips had traced just last night.
His fingers gently brushed her cheek, tilting her face to his. His lips were mere inches fro hers, his breath on her face. "I love you Gabi. I always will."
And with that one statement, that one moment of time, a lifetime of two destinies were fulfilled. Souls that had been torn apart when it had been Father Antonio Torres and Gabriella Martinez were now reunited. Destiny was completed. And a tear rolled from Gabi's eye.
Destiny was completed.
PROLOGUE: Monday, 5:45 p.m. Time stood still for a moment, as if some great force was allowing the two souls to "reacquaint" each other by first sight. And though they were strangers until this very moment, just by the way they took each other in with their eyes it seemed as if they were once lost lovers brought back together by destiny, by faith. The two beings could barely say a single word, yet their eyes spoke stories. Tales of a priceless friendship, lessons of love and forgiveness, and of a forbidden passion.
"Gabi, I'd like you to meet my brother-in-law, Ricardo's brother. This is Antonio Torres. Antonio, this is my baby sister, Gabriella Martinez."
He extended his hand to her, finally finding his voice as he spoke, "It's a pleasure to meet you, Gabriella."
She blushed, taking his welcoming hand. She would never get used to anyone calling her "Gabriella", not even when it was spoken by this man, who she surprisingly felt naturally close to. "Like wise, Antonio."
As their hands met, a blinding flash appeared before their eyes. They couldn't explain it, nor could they explain the emotions stirring within themselves when they first touched. Their eyes found each other again, wondering...
PART ONE: THE TOUCH
Tuesday, 7:15 a.m. It had been only yesterday when Gabi had first met Antonio Torres. This mysterious brother of Ricardo. But in that one day, those mere 24 hours, she felt like she knew him better than anyone else in her life. There was just something in the way those dark eyes of his watched her, something in that hint of a smile, that told her she wasn't the only one seeing deeper, feeling more that a mere greeting of two friends.
Gabi had arrived in this gorgeous beachside town just yesterday to spend this one week visiting her half sister, Paula. And suddenly, upon arrival, her respite had been turned upside down by one man. Antonio. That chiseled face. Those dark eyes. Those dimples. The hair that literally begged to be ruffled by her hands. Those eyes, so deep and dark and full of mysteries that Gabi was itching to uncover. Why did she suddenly feel so overwhelmed by this one man, such a pull of destiny?
She sat on a bench at the ocean's edge, watching the waves crash into shore. It was a gorgeous morning. Not having slept well last night, she was up at the break of dawn. Her sleep had been full of memories, and of dreams. She kept wanting to call those dreams memories of another time, because they all seemed so real. But Gabi knew it just had to be her imagination. Memories of friendship, unconditional beyond explanation. Memories of long talks, of laughter. Memories of one passionate night that was just out of grasp. Those memories haunted her, had Gabi up at the break of dawn, begging her to uncover the memories' source.
Those memories, and that look, the hidden stories, in Antonio's eyes. That haunted look. Gabi personally knew that slightly haunted look she had witnessed deep in his eyes, yesterday. Because years ago, she had seen those same haunted expressions within her own eyes, every time she had looked in a mirror. But Gabi had been lucky. She had a saving grace to vanquish the haunting memories. And she wasn't so sure Antonio had that same saving grace. Because that hollow gaze still rested deep within his eyes.
Sister Gabriella Martinez's healing grace had been the convent. After enduring endless abuse, pain and suffering at her father's careless hands, she was left in the nurturing care of the nuns at the convent. And their love had saved her. But what had been Antonio's saving grace? His haunting had been his beloved sister's death. But his saving grace? Gabi pondered on this thought. Paula said it had been Nikki, the girlfriend. But if Nikki was truly what brought Antonio out of the depths of despair after Maria's demise, then Nikki hadn't done a very good job.
Oh, Gabi wasn't trying to be judging or cruel. But somehow, Gabi saw beyond the dimpled smile, the casual arm draped around the tall, blonde Nikki that she had met yesterday. And Gabi saw something inside of Antonio that she doubted anyone else could see, or understand. She wasn't sure she even understood it herself. It was almost like there was a need, a hole, and a void that she alone was meant to fill. But exactly what the need was, Gabi was both hesitate and afraid to find out.
She had made a pact with herself last night, before crawling into bed in the guest room at Paula and Ricardo's. She convinced herself that during this week stay in Sunset Beach, Gabi was going to find out what had drawn her so instantly to Antonio. What had suddenly turned her trip from a visit with Paula, into a mission to understand her and this man? Destiny. And it was going to be uncovered.
The breezes off the ocean were picking up. Gabi's hair kept tangling around her face, and as she turned her head to allow the wind to blow through the dark strands, she caught sight of a figure jogging up the ocean. Antonio.
Her breath instantly caught inside. Why did her body react as if on auto pilot every time she saw this man? She swallowed hard, as she watched him run. He was obviously in another world, jogging amidst the froth of the surf. He was clad in a tight white tank, and loose fitting gym shorts. That shirt highlighted muscles of steel in his arms, across his chest. As he approached, she could see the pattern of his breathing in the rise and fall of his chest.
Suddenly Gabi's mind reeled back to another life. She could feel her hands on that chest, pushing aside a shirt . a black button up shirt. His skin was hot, the air stifling and smothering. She could literally feel the beat of his heart, fast and furious, under her hand.
As Antonio slowed his run, he saw the image of the young woman he had met the day before. Paula's half sister. Sister Gabriella Martinez, was sitting on the beachside bench ahead. A part of him wanted to continue to run, pretend he had not seen her. But he knew he couldn't. Yesterday had hit him hard. There was something in her eyes, in her touch that literally sucked him in. It was an amazing physical and emotional connection that he knew shouldn't be there. He knew it, yet that knowledge didn't stop that undeniable connection. She was a nun. A Sister! Promised to God. And he was attached to Nikki. The girl that had saved him, partially, from his dark demise after Maria had died.
He stopped his run and half jogged, half casually strode to stand beside the bench where Gabi sat, and Antonio tried to catch his breath. But suddenly it wasn't physical exertion that had him struggling to breathe, but those flashes of blinding memories from their meeting the day before that had him struggling. Flashes of memories just out of mind's reach.
"Gabriella," he nodded, still breathless.
Gabi looked up, shaken out of her dream. He stood before her, the sun highlighting his silhouette against the sky. Sweat glistened across his shoulders. Gabi could taste the sweat on her tongue.
How? What was happening to her? Gabi licked her lips in an effort to gain control.
"Antonio," but it came out a hoarse whisper. More of a passionate cry for help than a friendly greeting.
The tension between the two in this moment was beyond description. Antonio could literally feel Gabi breathing, struggling. And he was having a hard time grasping concepts. He should've been asking her how she was. Small talk. Discussing Paula and Ricardo. Their upcoming dinner party. Anything. Instead, all he could do was stare at her, fixated on those eyes . that face. That delicate body.
She was dressed as no nun he had ever seen before, clad in casual denim shorts and a pink tank top that matched the flush on her cheeks. Her black hair was loose, brushing past her shoulders and floating on the morning breeze. It kept tangling around her dark eyes, brushing past her lips.
Those lips. His heart leapt, his mind conjuring up images, tastes. He had tasted those lips somewhere, in a dark, smothering place. He had tasted those lips hungrily, as if there was no tomorrow. It was a taste so real, he couldn't look away.
There was just something about her . an allure, her down to earth demeanor, her eyes, that had him thinking he knew her from somewhere. No, sometime far away. Someplace so special he wanted to go back there. He kept seeing images of her, in another life time, flashing before his eyes. Images of passion that were beginning to disturb him. Those images had him wanting to reach out and touch her, skim those lips, to see if that taste in his mind was real.
But he couldn't. God, what was he thinking? Why was his mind going there? This was a nun. A nun! And he was dating Nikki. He tried desperately to seek images of Nikki in his mind, to bring about the taste of her lips when they kissed. But all he could taste, all he could feel was this heavenly woman sitting on the bench. Gabi. It was as if it had always been Gabi. As if it would always be.
"Gabi ." he muttered again, a whisper.
She had to get a grasp on reality, she told herself. Carry on a conversation. Stop whatever was happening between the duo, before it went too far. "How . how are you today?" It came out a forced squeak, and she cringed inwardly.
Antonio continued to stare helplessly at those lips. He wanted to say he was dying to kiss her, to taste her, to see if the memories were real. He wanted to say he had been haunted all night of passionate, forbidden dreams. Dreams of her walking into his bedroom. Dreams of her touching his chest. Dreams of her kissing him insistently. Instead, "Fine."
Gabi rose off of the bench. She had to move, to look away from this man. Talk. Walk. Something. "Would you care to join me for a walk?"
He watched her erratic breathing. She was definitely feeling the connection too. "Yes."
But Gabi thought that yes sounded like a yes of passion, of giving in to love instead of a simple agreement to take a walk. So she refused, at first, to meet his eyes as they strode casually along the water's edge.
So she decided to ask the first thing that popped up in her mind. "Since when did you decide to go jogging in place of surfing?"
Antonio hesitated, studying her face. "How did you know I surf?"
Fate.
Gabi broke stride momentarily, as her mind reeled. How, indeed. But she replied, "Paula must've told me." But somehow, both knew Paula had said no such thing. And as they walked on, the waves lapping at the shore, the gulls calling overhead, the sun rising higher on the horizon, they talked. And shared. About life, surfing, Maria, Ricardo. About Sunset Beach, the ocean, and their histories. About Gabi joining the convent, her father and his abuse. About Antonio's reasons for loving Nikki.
Somehow, in that one morning of conversations, as they talked, it seemed as if they were rehashing old times, sharing memories as opposed to acquainting the other with their life histories. Antonio recalled Gabi's pain, when she shared her father's abuse. Yes, there was pain there today as she discussed it. But . his heart told him he had lived this before. And that was what scared him so much, the memory of her. Of Gabriella Martinez.
The conversation slowly turned from the two of them to Ricardo and Paula's small dinner party that evening. Actually, the dinner was just for them, to welcome Gabi to Sunset Beach. Ricardo was at work today, at the Police Station. Paula had taken the week on vacation to spend time with her half sister. And tonight Paula had insisted on giving Gabi a proper welcome. Paula, Ricardo, Gabi, Antonio, and his date.
Gabi wasn't the jealous type, but she hated the thought of Antonio bringing Nikki to the dinner party tonight. Somehow Gabi felt it could be special, could be destiny, without Nikki. Gabi sensed that Nikki would interfere. But Gabi was just being jealous. She was not the jealous type, nor had Gabi ever imagined being jealous of what Nikki had. But, despite not wanting to be, she was. Nikki had this man. Antonio. She had his touch, his kiss, and his life. And a piece of Gabi's heart said it should've been hers. Even though she knew it wasn't right or true, she couldn't convince her heart of that, after meeting Antonio.
Their long walk along the beach had eventually taken Gabi back to Paula and Ricardo's home along the beach. So Gabi went to make her casual goodbye. And to ask her quiet inquiry, hoping Nikki wouldn't be coming tonight. "What time will you and Nikki be arriving tonight?"
"Probably about 7:30. Nikki's shift at the hospital ends at 7:00, and she was planning on coming by to pick me up. Since I live much closer to Ricardo's, it would be simpler than me going all the way out to the hospital to meet her, then driving all the way over."
Gabi merely nodded her agreement. But her heart was begging for Nikki not to come. Her mind kept telling her heart to get back to reality. "Then I will look forward to seeing you tonight." She turned to go, but was hesitant.
As was Antonio to let her go. "Gabi ."
"Yes?" It was breathless, waiting.
"Thank you. Thank you for the walk."
She nodded, staring intently into his face. Gabi was dying to reach out and touch him before he left. To see if the memories in her mind were as real as they felt. Reality had her hesitating. But soon her body took over. He was simply standing there too, watching the battle on her face. He knew she was trying to decide something. Trying to see if her heart or mind would win out. And as her hand, tiny and delicate, reached out to touch him, he couldn't help but smile ever so slightly, a dimple showing. Her body and soul won out. She was feeling the connection just as much as he. The destiny that breathed its own life between them.
And she gently brushed her hand on his shoulder. His skin was hot from the morning sun, burning under her touch. Their eyes met, and without explanation or understanding time stood still and shifted. Flashes of memories that weren't really there danced between this forever forbidden duo. The memories played out too fast to grasp and hold. Except the concept of unconditional love, of a friendship beyond comprehension. And time paused just long enough for Sister Gabriella Martinez and Antonio Torres to glimpse a memory of a lifetime ago . of the two of them on another beach somewhere, Antonio jogging up out of the water, rubbing his damp hair with a towel, Gabi staring as she stood in the sand, slowing from her own jog. Staring, wanting, needing. And another memory of her touching his shoulder. A boat, abandoned. Trapped and locked. His shoulder. This shirt. She remembered the feel of his skin. The heat. His body reverberated with the power of her touch, so delicate and caressing. And the connection they felt in the memory and in the moment now had them both gazing in wonder at one another.
PART TWO: THE KISS
Tuesday, 6:50 p.m. She could still feel the burning heat of Antonio's skin beneath her touch. Her mind still reeled with blinding images of the destiny between this man and herself. Destiny that she was no where near to understanding or comprehending. As much as Sister Gabi tried to pry her mind from this man, this power he held over her, it was to no avail. Why did she suddenly feel so overwhelmed by this one man, such a pull of destiny? Gabi had to get a grip, get back to reality. But she knew this would be impossible until she uncovered the destiny that weighed between this mysterious Antonio Torres and herself.
Gabi stood cutting the tomatoes for the salad, inside Paula's kitchen. Ricardo had just gotten home from the police station and was in the shower getting ready for the dinner party. Gabi had to keep her mind off Antonio, onto her cooking duties. But she also knew Antonio would be arriving soon. His presence, his tempting body, those dimples, those drowning eyes would soon swallow everything inside the loft. And if Gabi was going to get under control, it was now or never.
And she made the decision, without realizing it, that it would be never. There was so much inside Antonio, in what drew her to him, that Gabi was determined to figure out. She had been debating on whether or not to bring up the subject of Antonio to Paula or not. After her encounter this morning with Antonio on the beach, Gabi had spent a lot of time thinking. Even if she couldn't explain it, there was something drawing her to this man. This tall, dark, sculptured soul that cried out to her. Passion. Desire! Or friendship, beyond description? Fate? Destiny? Whatever reason it was, Gabi was now more determined than ever to delve into it.
Gabi couldn't help but smile at the obvious love that Ricardo and Paula shared. It was in their gazes, their secret smiles. Her mouth twitched briefly. She was happy for her half sister, but the tiniest piece of her heart was jealous today. The dark recesses of her heart questioned what it would be like to share that secret smile, to know that kind of love that only two could share. What would that be like with Antonio? She knew, despite what Paula had told her, that Antonio and Nikki didn't share that same depth of caring. But could he share it with her? There was no point in answering that question. No reason to go there. Gabi was committed to the church, Antonio to Nikki. That was what she should've been concentrating on. But her mind kept playing back those images. The feel of Antonio hidden in her mind, and somehow his taste and those lips were coming to mind. The taste .
"Nikki makes Antonio happy?" Gabi queried, trying to get her mind off the taste. She dropped the neatly sliced pieces of the last tomato in the salad, and stirred methodically.
Paula's eyebrow rose in question, at the suddenness of Gabi's statement but she answered. "Yes. He seems really happy with her."
But not happy enough. Not loved with the kind of love that crushes your heart, with the fire that burns inside, Gabi thought. The love that makes your heart ache with the need to be with that person, the love that cries out with passion and touches and something as simple as friendship. Because if Antonio shared that kind of love with Nikki, that depth of caring, it would be evident in everything he did, in every word he spoke of her. But it wasn't there.
Gabi opened her mouth to ask Paula more, but the phone rang. Paula quickly answered it, and as Gabi casually stirred the salad, only caught this end of the conversation. "Hello?" Pause. "Oh no. We'll all miss you." Pause. "I'm sorry." Pause. "I'll send Gabi right over, my hands are full with my special sauce for the spaghetti." Pause. "Don't worry, I'll save you a plate." Pause. "Don't work too hard. Bye."
As she hung up, Gabi asked, "What was that all about?"
"It was Nikki," Paula sighed. "An emergency came up at the hospital, and since one of the nurses called in sick tonight, Nikki's going to have to stay until 11:00 to help out."
Gabi's heart leapt a tiny bit. Even though she knew she shouldn't feel happy about Nikki not being able to make the dinner party, Gabi was glad. She knew it was terribly wrong of her, but that didn't stop Gabi's heart from beating and desiring time with Antonio. He would be much more apt to feeling the connection and destiny that Gabi felt, without Nikki hovering over. Gabi couldn't help the piece of her heart that was jealous of Nikki, and what she had. Even if it was wrong, Gabi wanted to discover where all these memories she was having about Antonio, this instant connection, was leading. There was something beyond what her eyes could see. There was something only their hearts could understand.
Gabi shook herself from her thoughts, as Paula continued. "Nikki tried calling Antonio, but couldn't get an answer. So since she wouldn't be by the phone most of the evening, she was wondering if we could go tell Antonio. And since he just lives up the way, I thought you could run up and tell him, bring him on down to the party since he won't have to wait on Nikki."
Gabi nodded. Suddenly she was nervous. It was one thing to secretly be jealous of Nikki and Antonio, one thing to secretly remember and desire those hidden thoughts of Antonio. But it was another to walk into his home, to enter such a personal area of his life and be exposed to him. And suddenly Gabi was frightened of all that she might uncover, of herself and her feelings for this man.
But she left to get Antonio, nonetheless. And took the walk along the beach to get there, to calm her thoughts and erase the voices of destiny from her mind.
It didn't work.
Antonio sat on his couch, trying to erase the memories of this nun, Sister Gabriella Martinez from his mind. But it wasn't working. He had dreamed of her taste, her tiny hands on his body all last night. And, as much as he hated to admit it, all this afternoon as well. The brief meeting this morning, her touch on his torso, had him flashing hot, his body responding to something he couldn't understand.
But tonight he was going to be with Nikki. Tonight, Nikki would distract him from this sinful draw he felt toward the Sister. Or so he thought. So he planned.
As Gabi approached Antonio's house, in the dusk hour, she noticed very few lights on inside. She knocked nervously on the door, and ran her hand over the front of her dress. She had changed into a simple sundress this evening. Pale yellow, with spaghetti straps, and tiny flowers gracing the bodice. Suddenly she wondered what Antonio would think of her dress? Of her coming to his house? When she got up the nerve to tell him about her dreams, her memories, what would he think? But somehow, Gabi thought he was sharing those memories too. Thought? She knew he was. It was in his eyes, his touch.
She knocked again, and this time heard his voice calling from inside. "The door is open."
She gently turned the knob and eased the door open. As she took a step inside, Antonio's shadowed figure quickly shoved the door closed behind her. He enveloped her in his arms, pulling her into the dark depths of the house. Gabi gasped at the strength of his body pressed against hers, the powerful heat emanating from him, the sheer memory of his body on hers. His muscles were taught, his body hard. But just as she gasped for air, his mouth covered hers in a kiss, taking away her breath. It more than took her breath away. It sucked the life from her. It fed her life. And they fell onto the couch, Antonio pressing Gabi into the soft cushions below.
His lips were hot, demanding, hungry. He tasted like the edges of her memories. Tasted like life, love and forgiveness. And Gabi couldn't help but melt into him. She didn't want to stop. Her hands were instantly on his body, across the tautness his back, touching his neck. Her fingers caressed his hair, that hair she had yearned to run her fingers through before. And she sighed into him. She breathed her life, her love, her need into this one kiss, this one man. Her body molded itself against his crushing strength. It felt like . home.
Home. That was the one word that reverberated into Gabi's conscience thought. Fate. Destiny. Home. She never once thought about the immorality of this moment. Just destiny.
Blinding flashes of memory . of dying kisses full of never-ending love. Of Antonio pressing her into the cushions of a couch, on the floor. Smothering air. Wet kisses. Passion beyond the moment. Sharing at last. Blinding flashes.
And now, she kissed him back. Opened her heart, body, mind to this moment. Even though later, she knew she would berate herself for being weak. At this moment, all she knew was the taste, the feel, the fulfillment of memories. "Antonio ." she whispered against his lips.
And he pulled away, opening his heavy lidded eyes. Even before he focused on the woman beneath him, he knew this was Gabi. Not Nikki. Not the woman he had planned on surprising, the woman he had expected at his door. He probably knew this was the gorgeous Gabi the second his lips tasted hers, because she was his memory. She tasted like his dream. But he didn't want to let go. And admitting it was Gabi he was kissing, holding, loving, would mean it was time to let go.
But reality was quickly setting in. He was lying on top of a nun. Gabi. A nun! He had kissed her with a passion he was supposed to reserve for Nikki. But it was a passion, a fulfillment he had yet to feel with her. Only with Gabriella Maritnez. Only.
"Gabi ." he whispered, trying to push himself up. Off of her soft body. Away from the responses he was feeling toward this woman, the memories that were fast becoming a reality. "I'm sorry . I ."
But she put a finger to his lips to quiet his protests. His dark eyes were clouded with the passion she felt from the kiss. And as she brushed her finger over his lips, their eyes carried those flashes of blinding memories. It was another day, a dark evening, and he walked in the door, she kissed him. The accidental kiss. The taste of love. The realization of true feelings for one another.
Was that a lifetime ago? Or today? Antonio shook his head free of the thought, and climbed off of Gabi. As she tried to quite the thoughts in her heart, she sat up.
"I'm sorry, Gabriella." His voice was low, hoarse. "I . I thought you were Nikki. I mean, she was going to pick me up, and I thought .."
Gabi licked her lip, watching his obvious discomfort. "I know." She sighed heavy hearted.
He looked down at her, sitting so demurely on his couch. That sundress gracing her curves, her skin glowing. Her lips were flushed from his kiss. And his heart wouldn't stop pounding. His mind wouldn't stop racing from her taste. It was as he dreamed. It wasn't a dream. This taste, this connection, those memories were somehow real. And it frightened the hell out of him.
"Nikki called," Gabi was trying to explain her reason for being in his house. On his couch. Under him as he kissed her. Why she wanted him to kiss her. "She won't be making it this evening. There was . an emergency at the hospital and she is having to cover another nurse's shift."
Antonio only nodded. He needed to get away from this place, this woman, being alone. "We ought to get to Ricardo's. Don't want to keep my big brother waiting." And with that, he turned to go.
"Antonio, wait." Gabi pleaded, standing and reaching for his arm. He stared down at her touch. So blindingly full of those haunting memories.
"Shouldn't we ." she hesitated. "Talk about this?" But what she wanted to say was . See what all this means? Shouldn't we try to grasp why we feel, what we feel? Understand this destiny? Shouldn't we see where this leads? Kiss? Touch? Love?
But she knew they couldn't. She knew it was totally wrong for her, a nun, to be even considering understanding where all of those feelings were coming from.
"Gabi ." he paused. "It was an accident. I don't think-"
But she wouldn't let it end at that. Gabi had made a pact with herself to uncover what was going on inside of her, why both of them were seeing this past between them. "No!" She gripped his arm harder. "Look at me."
And when he did, she saw the fear of the unknown there in his eyes. The pleading look to leave it alone. But she just couldn't. Because they both deserved to understand. "Antonio . Please tell me you have been sensing what I am. Please tell me you feel this connection ."
"It doesn't matter what we feel," he tried to be sane. "It doesn't matter what is there. It can't be. It cannot be there. You are a nun. I am committed to Nikki."
Gabi's eyes begged him to understand. "Please. I know that. But, I . have to know."
His eyes told her the truth. She saw the connection, she saw the passion, the blinding memories dancing there. They both knew it. They had both felt it in their initial meeting, and on the beach this morning. And it blazed beyond denial in their kiss. And the both knew they couldn't ignore it forever.
But he said, "You already know the truth." And turned to walk out the door.
Gabi's heart leapt, skipped a beat. Destiny. And she followed him out the door to Ricardo's. Destiny. The thought kept ringing in her mind. And in her heart, she kept playing back the kiss. That kiss was opening a porthole into another dimension for her. And tonight, Gabi was going to find out what was on the other side.
PART THREE: THE LOVE
Tuesday, 8:17p.m. "Come on, T, dance with the Sister," Ricardo urged his little brother. Antonio wanted to pretend that he hadn't heard his brother's request. He actually wanted to pretend Gabriella Martinez wasn't even in the room. But that was impossible. He couldn't miss her presence, her appeal, and the taste of that kiss on his mind. That had been a mistake, his mind kept berating. But it had felt oh so right. His arms around her, her soft curves against him, those sweet lips on his, her hands in his hair. It had been a dream. Heaven. And now he had to, needed to, put this snowballing attraction behind him.
No. There was no way he could dance with Gabriella. No way.
"T?" Ricardo paused in his dance with Paula. "Come on ."
Gabi, who up to this point had been sitting demurely on the sofa, rose, waiving Ricardo's request off. "There is no need. I ." But before she could continue, Ricardo pulled her over to where Antonio stood, stiffly.
She rolled her eyes in defeat. "Is he always this demanding?" Gabi teased Paula.
"Only when it involves his family, work, or friends!"
Everyone got a laugh out of that, and Gabi and Antonio gave in to Ricardo's request to dance. Gabi was hesitant at first, not sure where to touch Antonio or even how she would react when she did touch him. He had been avoiding her fairly well after their kiss. Not a word was spoken between the duo on the walk up the beach to the loft. And only cordial, small talk had occurred between them during the dinner party. Enough so that Paula and Ricardo weren't in the least bit suspicious. But Gabi was. Something had happened. And it was more than a kiss. More than an accident. And Antonio knew it too.
Licking his lips nervously, Antonio gently laid a hand on Gabi's tiny waist and took her hand in his other. She was so soft, so warm. So tiny. He swallowed hard. Gabi looked expectantly at him as he pulled her closer to dance. The music was sultry and slow. A part of Gabi wished for the radio DJ to quickly pick a fast paced song so that this pull would end. But she also knew that the pull, the destiny would never leave. Slow song or not.
She sighed slightly, settling into the feel of dancing in Antonio's arms. Her body fit perfectly against his, every crevice and curve had a home on his muscled planes. For how long they held each other, breathing the same breaths, moving in complete unision, neither knew. Suddenly the casual dance between friends that Ricardo had encouraged had become a dance between lovers of a life past. An awakening of passion and an understanding of their need to love and be loved by the other.
Gabi's eyes met Antonio's and they shared more than the moment. Shared memories of a dance ages ago in a festive atmosphere . a party. A dance that held the first knowledge of love. And another dance, a dance out of neccisity that reawakened what should have been dead, but would never die between this forbidden duo.
And as those flashes played between their bodies, Gabi backed away, her eyes still locked with Antonio's. For the first time, she was truly not afraid of what was between them. She understood and knew the destiny there. It was undescribable, completely unbelievable. But she knew that before the week would end, this man was her destiny.
And Antonio knew it too. He turned to his brother. "Ricardo, if you don't mind, I'll cut out now. It has been a long day."
Ricardo was too busy mesmerized in his wife's presence to grasp the tension between Gabi and his little brother. That was a good thing. "Sure, T."
Gabi was torn between staying behind and walking Antonio out. The fulfillment of this fate demanded she follow him. Her sanity and the safe habors inside said to stay. But the pull of her heart, the tug within that wouldn't be denied had her speaking up. "I'll walk Antonio out." And she followed, fatefully, Antonio out of the loft.
"Gabi ." he paused on the porch, his eyes studying the patterns of the stars as they appeared in the night sky.
"Antonio, we ."
But neither knew exactly what to say. It was there, stretched out before them just as sure as the ocean waves that crashed in the distance, just as far reaching as the expanse of night overhead. But neither knew what to say. Or what to do.
"Gabi, we can't do this." Antonio finally spoke up. His heart was heavy, busting. This pull inside was just too strong. This past too heavy to let go. But he could not allow himself to fulfill this destiny either.
"Can't do what?"
Antonio gently grabbed Gabi's hand, touched the delicate skin, and pulled her on a walk along the ocean's edge with him, to the safe haven under the pier. "This." He motioned with his free arm, tugged her hand with his other. "This." He took a small step toward her and she gasped lightly at the warmth emanating from him. It was happening.
"Gabriella, we can't allow this to happen."
She looked away, out to the ocean waves mingling with the dark sky. It was hard to tell where one ended and the other began. And it was just as difficult for Gabi to grasp the concepts of where reality ended and this destiny began. Or were they to end the same?
Her heart sat heavy in her chest, the ache of a sob buried deep within. She knew she should, rationally, be denying this love that was pulling her to Antonio. She was a nun. She barely knew him. He was dating another woman. She was a nun! But not a single one of those thoughts could shake what was in her heart, what was to be their destiny.
"Can't allow it? Or won't? Antonio, don't you feel this . history? Can you feel it?" She clasped her fingers around his, gently tugged his hand to rest above her heart.
He swallowed hard, trying to be noble, to do the right thing. "Gabriella . you and I both know we can't pretend this . this isn't sitting between us. I can't begin to explain it or even justify it, but I feel it just as you do. But we cannot act on it."
"Even if it is destiny?" It was now or never. Time to cross that line, to reach the other side, to see what was there, beyond the next dimension. It was to be.
And with that Gabi ran her free hand up Antonio's arm, grazing the skin beneath her touch, smoothing over the cotton of his button down shirt. She traced the pattern of his lips. Those lips. She would forever dream of those lips, the love they so freely gave. And she took another step closer to him. By now, their bodies were mere inches apart. The heat of his burned her skin through the sundress. His breathing was just as erratic as hers. And the moment she raised her eyes to meet Antonio's smoldering gaze, fate stepped in. There was nothing either member of this forever forbidden duo could do. It had always meant to be, it would forever be meant between the two.
Neither knew who made the first move. But somehow they were kissing. Not a playful, testing kiss. But a kiss, as if they were sharing their last breaths. A kiss of passions buried for decades, centuries, lifetimes, universes. A kiss that would forever bound the two.
Although neither spoke a word, as they pulled apart, stared into each other's eyes, they knew. Knew of all that was to come, all that should have been before. All that should forever be. Destiny. And drifting on the breeze, the memories of a voice, "Gabi . what are we doing?" And without the conscience knowledge, both muttered, as their lips met again, "I know what I am doing.."
Somehow, they were tumbling on the sand, the pounding of the surf slow and methodical compared to the breathless beatings of their hearts. Gabi was gasping for air, struggling with the buttons on Antonio's shirt. Then she tasted his chest, his neck. Salt. Sweat. The tastes of memory and reality mingling into one. Flashes of the only thing that could be . love. And Antonio was behind her, tugging at the straps of her dress, his lips grazing, tasting, relishing her body. Her head lulled in the release she felt, the power of his kiss, those magical hands. Completion of destiny. Forever love. What could never have been before was here now.
"Antonioooo," she whispered, her eyes hovering half open. He smiled, ran a hand over her face, touched her lips, brushed her hair out of her face. And with the gentleness only Antonio could possess, he laid her down on the sand. Memories of grainy couch cushions, dank air, smothering and dark, but of the ultimate love filtered between them.
And he lowered himself to her, kissed her, took her, made this beautiful angel beneath him his own, if only for the hour. Neither Antonio Torres or this Sister Gabriella Martinez could ever explain where this love came from. Neither even cared at this moment. They only cared for the fulfillment, the fate, the love that flowed. It was the completion of their destinies.
"I don't know how much longer we have here. But there is one thing that will never die. I love you, Gabi. And I always will, no matter what." Those softly spoken words floated from another life, on the ocean breeze, crashing down with the force of destiny on the forbidden duo.
They could have felt remorse, torturing their souls. They could have felt shame for what society would say shouldn't be. But they didn't. All they felt was the love of another lifetime coming to fulfillment. The needs, what had always been meant to be.
Gabi instinctively snuggled her face into Antonio's neck. "I love you," she whispered. But he already knew. It had been there all along.
"I love you, Gabi. And I always will ." and he highlighted their newfound declarations of love with a kiss.
And in the distance, a faint voice. Ricardo's voice. "Gabi? T? You out here?"
PART FOUR: THE LIFE
Wednesday, 10:33 a.m. Gabi's bags were packed. Her mind was set, her heart afire . waiting. She stood outside Antonio's house, taking slow deep breaths. Her future, her life, destiny awaited in the next few moments. After hearing Ricardo and Paula calling for her last night, she and Antonio had quickly dressed and managed to steer clear of Ricardo and Paula. But Antonio had withdrawn inside himself, muttering something about sinning for a second time. In a second life. And he had told her to forget what had happened, and he'd went back to his home.
But Gabi could never forget what had happened. The moment Antonio had disappereaed, Paula found her under the pier. And there was no following, searching, begging Antonio to understand. Paula was observant. She knew something was going on. Especially this morning as Gabi huridly packed her bags and left. As much as Paula demanded an answer for Gabi's hasty retreat, Gabi wouldn't give her one. She had to see Antonio. Only Antonio.
And Antonio's answer would be her future decision. If he could still admit he loved her today, want the fulfillment of their lives and destinies, then she would be the happiest girl in Sunset Beach. Her soul would have its completion. But if he said it could never be, she would respect his wishes and return to the convent and her passionless, loveless life. It was all in Antonio's hands now.
She knocked nervously on the door. What would Antonio be thinking this morning? After he had slept and had time to think about their actions? Their love? Would he deny it all? Go back to his life with Nikki? Or would he admit to what his soul demanded? Gabi was sick with nerves, with the need to know.
The door opened, and Antonio's face greeted the morning. He looked like heaven, standing barefoot and bare chested in black boxers at the door. His hair was rumpled, his eyes tired. But she could still see the love, the need buried within those eyes. Gabi's heart skipped a beat with hope. "Gabriella."
"Antonio. We need to talk." It was a breathless whisper, of hope and passion. Her eyes searched Antonio's face for answers. But she found none.
Antonio stepped aside and allowed Gabi to enter his house. His eyes were all over her this morning, just as his hands and lips had been the night before. She grew more lovely every time he saw her. Today she wore a cream miniskirt and a halter top in shades of cream, pink, lavendar, and blues. But it was what was written in those eyes that called out to him, drew him into her. It was the unconditional love he saw written there.
Maybe Antonio hadn't reacted properly last night, after hearing Ricardo calling for them. But regret from a lifetime before had filled his soul. Sins of another life, that he had allowed himself to feel shame for, had haunted him. But shame was only what he made of it. Shame was there because he had allowed it a lifetime ago, when Father Antonio had sinned against his commitment. Now, he could say he had sinned again against God because of Sister Gabriella's commitment. But he could also say he had fulfilled destiny. Completed the love. Made what should have been then, complete now.
Nikki had come by after her late shift. But Antonio had feigned being tired, begged her to come back another day. He had to think, had to grasp the truth of what had happened. Yes, he and Gabi had made love. They had given in to desires of the flesh, of this earth. But he and she both knew it went so far beyond that. What they shared, what their souls cried out for was on another plane of life. It was destiny.
"Antonio. I have to ask you a question." She rang her hands nervously, her heart beating loud enough she was sure he could hear it.
"Yes?"
"Did you mean what you said last night? Do you still love me?" It came out a breathless whisper. In her hearts memory, she knew she has asked this question one too many times in another life. But she would only ask it this once. Once more.
He had made his decision last night. Admist the hours of sleepless dark, his heart demanding answers. His mind crying out for reality. And he had finally made a decision both his heart, his destiny, his mind and soul could live with.
"Do I love you? Will I always love you? No matter what?"
"Yes." It was a whisper, barely audible above the pounding of their hearts. Gabi's eyes were full of unshed tears, her heart tearing, dying to know the truth.
"You already know the answer to that," he whispered, stepping closer to Gabi.
"Say it, please," she begged, her hand resting on his chest, touching the path where her lips had traced just last night.
His fingers gently brushed her cheek, tilting her face to his. His lips were mere inches fro hers, his breath on her face. "I love you Gabi. I always will."
And with that one statement, that one moment of time, a lifetime of two destinies were fulfilled. Souls that had been torn apart when it had been Father Antonio Torres and Gabriella Martinez were now reunited. Destiny was completed. And a tear rolled from Gabi's eye.
Destiny was completed.