Amelia's out the door before she fully realises what she's doing. She faintly remembers telling Owen that she needs some air and grabbing her phone, and him calling after her. But she's already out on the street and walking away purposefully.
Her feet carry her to her destination on autopilot. She's walked this route so many times she could do it in her sleep and it gives her an opportunity to let her mind run wild.
What on earth was she thinking? Owen had been trying to be so sweet and gentle and supportive, and here she is roaming the streets by herself. She's gotten herself into a mess again and she's dragging him down with her.
As she reaches her destination she looks up. The hospital looms over her, bright and glorious. It's still busy, even at this time at night, and the notion gives her a strange sense of comfort. She can't go in though, she has no business being there and so instead she sits down on one of the benches nearby.
The phone in her hand buzzes and she realises she has three missed calls from Owen. Amelia knows he must be worried right about now and she considers texting him, but she can't just yet, there's a phone call she has to make first.
She dials the right number and waits for it to ring. After three rings the person on the other line picks up. "Dr Charlotte King" A voice with a slight southern drawl says and Amelia sighs in relieve, grateful that Charlotte answered the phone.
"I did it again Charlotte" Amelia says, without thinking, and before she can say more Charlotte interrupts her. "Amelia, what's wrong" She asks, voice laced with concern, "Are you okay?".
Amelia immediately realises her mistake and the conclusion Charlotte must have jumped to and she hurries to answer, "Yeah I'm fine, well not completely actually. I stormed out of my own apartment again. Like one time wasn't brilliant enough". She sighs. Genius neurosurgeon and yet she can't keep running out of her own home. Admittedly it's not just her home this time, but that doesn't make it that much better.
A huff sounds on the other end of the line before Charlotte says, "What was it this time?". Only Charlotte can pull of that tone without it being degrading and suddenly Amelia realises just how much she's missed her best friend.
"Owen proposed" Amelia whispers, as if saying it out loud will make it even more real than it already is, "And I freaked".
"Congratulations" Charlotte says. She knows Amelia well enough to know that the fact that she's on the phone right now means that she's scared more than anything. "But you didn't run to the other side of the country" She notes dryly.
Amelia sighs. "No because I want to say yes" She says, "I just… I'm terrified Charlotte. I don't exactly have a good track record with proposals. And Owen, he wants to start a family, and so do I. I want to give him that, I just don't know if I can".
That's the root of the problem. The proposal means starting a family, having kids, and she's scared as hell that something will go wrong.
"You gotta tell him that Amelia. The man obviously loves you, just give him a chance to help you with this" Charlotte says. And Amelia knows she's right, but that doesn't make it any easier.
Just then a figure comes walking down the street and towards the bench Amelia's sitting on. She sighs as she recognises him and looks down in her lap. "I have to go Charlotte, Owen is here".
"Talk to him" Charlotte says, "And call me later". With that the two hang up, and Amelia waits until Owen reaches her side.
He sits down next to her on the bench, but with a foot of distance between them, and Amelia feels guilt creeping up on her. His proposal had been so sweet and she'd just run out. She felt like a horrible person.
"How did you know where I was" Amelia asks, just to break the awkward silence between them. He smiles feebly. "I know you" is all he says, and it's enough.
They sit in silence for a few minutes before Owen can't take it anymore. "I'm sorry" He starts, but she doesn't give him a chance to finish. "Owen you have nothing to apologize for. I'm the one who's sorry" She says, "I shouldn't have run off. You've been so patient, and you should be mad at me".
He sighs, "if you don't want to marry me that's fine amelia, i can't fault you for that" He says, and she feels her heart break into a million pieces. "I want to, I want to marry you, I do" She tries to assure him, but he still looks desperate as he turns to face her. "then help me understand, please, i wanna help you" he begs.
Amelia knows this is her chance, this is where she has to tell him and she steadies herself with a deep breath before she starts speaking.
"Remember how I told you I was engaged before I came to Seattle? I ran from him, as fast as I could, but his proposal wasn't half as terrifying as yours" She starts, "James, he was a good guy, he helped me through a lot of heartache and he helped stand back on my own two feet. But we were never going to work out. We were too different. He never understood me, no matter how hard he tried, because he'd never really suffered".
"Being with him was easy because he loved me and I never had to worry about getting married, starting a family or having kids. During that time he just loved me unconditionally and that was enough. There was no future to worry about, and when he started to think there was I broke things off, because we weren't meant to be".
She pauses momentarily but continues before he has a chance to form a reply. "But with you, with you I want all those things. I want to be a wife and I want to start a family, and to spend the rest of our lives together. And that scares me more than anything. I want to give you everything, but I'm terrified that I won't be able to. And I can't lose you Owen, I love you too much for that".
Amelia finally looks up and meets his eye. He looks relieved. "I just want you Amelia, you're all I need" He says and she raises her eyebrows, "You want kids Owen". He shakes his head vigorously. "Not if it means losing you" He says, "I've made that mistake before Amelia, I won't make it again".
She knows he talking about Cristina. They broke up because he'd wanted kids and she didn't. But that wasn't an issue between the two of them. "I want babies too" Amelia whispers.
The smile that lights up his face is blinding and she feels tears prickle in her eyes. "What if my body only makes broken babies? I don't think I could live through that again" She admits quietly.
Owen cups her face with one of his hands. "Then we'll cross that bridge when we come to it" He says. He knows about her anencephalic baby and he knows how rare those cases are. "Chances are we'll get a perfectly healthy baby. And there are other ways to start a family Amelia. We'll make it work, I know we will".
She smiles now too, finally, and he's happy that he's gotten through to her, that she let him in. Amelia wipes away the stray tears that have fallen down her cheeks and laughs. "Ask me again" She says.
For a second he's not sure what she means but then he catches on and smiles. He gets down on one knee and takes out the ring that he brought from home, the ring that Meredith gave him, the one that belonged to Amelia's mother.
"Amelia shepherd, I love you, and I promise I'll always love you, even when I hate you. I wanna spend the rest of my life loving you, if you'll let me. Will you marry me" He says.
She slings her arms around his neck and kisses him. Then she pulls away again, "Yes, the answer is yes, yes I wanna marry you".
AN: I guess this sort of qualifies for day 6 of Owelia week, if you take it literally xD Anyway, I only have one more Owelia fic idea and then I'm out so if anyone has any promts feel free to share them, I need some inspiration. Hope you liked it! Xx