Authors comments before you begin reading:

I would recommend you listen to some nice songs for this, and quite possibly

'Holding on and letting go' by Ross copperman :]


The male that stared back at him inside of the mirror was questionable, who was he? The eyes looked sad, strained from the burden of this life. The hunters life. This was the price they all had to pay, that soon their smiles would fade; if you were grown into this life by relatives, it was your legacy. Dean gripped hard onto either sides of the sink, staring at himself hard in his piercing green eyes. They stared back and started to water, the glossy film covering the entirety of the his iris'. This is who he had become? Staring down at his arm where it was now an imprint on his skin, Dean exhaled slowly and stood tall, gripping his sleeve and pulling it back. There it was, the mark of Cain. Dean nearly burned a hole where it sat, but in one quick motion he covered it up quickly, feeling as if the longer he looked at it, the stronger the sensation grew to kill.

Turning and gripping the bathroom door firm, Dean took a glance back at the mirror; getting a flash of a smirk from the reflective him. Moving out of the bathroom he stared around the cheap motel; the beds were tidy. Sam must have cleaned it up from the mess they had made a little while ago.

Shutting the door behind him, Dean sat on the end of the bed, letting a slight exhale of exasperation hit him. His thumbs pressed together and his own fingers entwined around the others; soon he was lost in thought staring in no particular spot. He could feel it, the heaviness grow in his eyes for the need to cry, this was starting to become too much. But he needed to do it, to kill Abaddon, so the mark of kings was something he needed to keep for the time being. Just for once though, did he want someone to take the pain away, make him forget about it. Opening his eyes he sucked his lips in thinking, before he sighed; was this even going to work?

"..Cas?" Dean said closing his eyes, and his fingers all snug in between one another as he- prayed. "I'm not even sure if Angel Heaven is on, but if you're hearing this.. please come. I need you." Dean opened his eyes very well knowing without his grace, or his wings, he was nearly human. The door jingled, and Dean reached for the inside of his pocket pulling out the silver gun, aiming it at the door now standing in a firm stance. He didn't recall Sam fiddling with a locked door like that; that he clearly had a key too. Sammy would call if he was making his way back to the motel, since that was the checks they did on one another. The door was pried open as he stood there, the parking lot light hitting him just right to make him look like he was glowing.

"-Cas." Dean spoke, a flash of hope wavering across his heart, and frankly the flash of a smile hit his face. Cas stared at him with a blank look, but almost relieved to see him here; "Dean- I heard you."

"Wait- you heard me?" Dean said moving the gun down and back into his pocket quickly; before Cas could see the shake. "You knew I prayed?"

"Prayed?" Cas asked his face turning slightly to the side, and Dean moved his head back confused; "So- if you didn't hear me pray, how'd you know to come here?"

Cas still stood at the doorway, before he walked in and closed the door slowly, not even touching the lock. Stepping forward to where Dean stood Cas' arms hung at his side;

"I knew you needed me, I- didn't want to disappoint you again, ignoring you that is." Cas said staring at the floor for a brief moment before he looked back up again at Dean. The weight had nearly been lifted from his shoulders, the pain of the mark almost evaporating in this moment of Cas being here. Dean moved forward and dug into it, he hugged Cas hard. His chin resting on his shoulder, even if Cas didn't wrap his arms around him, this was good enough. Not even moving his arms, only slightly to hug the waist of Deans before he awkwardly put them down. Dean had felt this and moved back, his hand still residing on his shoulder for meer comfort. The look Castiel had given him was something of a stern face; "Dean- why'd you do it?" he asked him, clearly picking back up where they had lastly left off, the mark of Cains.

"Really Cas?" Dean had asked turning away, now sitting on the bed his hands resting on the cheeks of his face. Cas glanced over at him, the look of a broken man sat before his eyes, he was hurt and needed help being fixed again. Cas had seen something from those shows, the ones on the T.V, the woman always cried turning it, and for her to feel better, the male normally kissed her and it leaded to them in bed. If he were to do that to him now, where would it lead for two guys? Moving forward Cas sat on the opposing bed, reaching his hand forward and gently touching Dean's knee in a way for comfort. The feeling of his hand on his knee made Dean look up at him, his face was sad, sheer pity.
Castiel opened his mouth slowly, gulping down trying to think of what to say; "Dean I'm sorry, I'm just worried about you. Someone needs to watch over you. I told your brother too, but I need to watch you for myself as well." Cas responded his thumb lightly rubbing his knee, he had seen the male on the show do that. Maybe he was just taking too many steps to this, but Dean's eyes were watery now like the woman; he was going to cry soon.

"For the last time Cas, I'm fine." Dean said nearly throwing a hard barrier up at the other, he didn't want him to ask anymore about this topic. Dean wanted him to ignore it.

Dean stared into the gray eyes, Cas almost was evaluating the situation, this didn't happen in that T.V show. He needed to come up with something quick, deciding on what to do, Cas' eyes nearly glowed to Dean. It seemed that this situation was his show now, Castiel needed to make his own Pizza man and woman show. But it was going to be with an Angel and a man.

Cas' fingers grew tight around Dean's knee, and he leaned forward staring into his face hard, what would the Angel say? No- what would a human say?
"You aren't." was all his words were, even if this moment was awkward it was pained Cas to see Dean like this. No longer smiling, nothing to live for except his brother. He wanted to change that, he wanted Dean to live for life and to have a happy one.
Maybe things would be different now that he was here trying to help him, just once would he want to see that smile again.

"I can see it Dean." Cas said a gentle whisper now rushing around them, the breath became small all of a sudden. Dean inhaled a touch and looked down, a single tear falling from his right eye splashing onto Cas' hand, he wasn't weak, was he? Maybe he grew broken over the times, but it didn't have to be like this for him.

"Why- Cas?" was all he asked through his cracking voice; he was asking why for everything.

Cas looked directly into the green eyes that seemed lost, confused. Almost like a little boy looking for his mother in a super store. But now he was a grown man still looking for his mother in a world so big.

"No one knows Dean, not even angels." Moving so his knee brushed against Dean's, sending cold chills down his spine. His muscles stiffened as he could see Cas moving closer, his hand now sliding to grip his sweaty hand. He didn't want to question it, but this was clearly another one of his motives. Cas grew closer, his face now staring directly into Dean's, their lips not even an inch apart. The last words Castiel could say were, "I can help you Dean." and the unfamiliar territory of Dean's was soon discovered by the angel. Dean could feel it, the plump lips of Cas was now moving on his. Was this helping him? Actually, the smooth lips was taking him away from the mark. Dean moved his hands gripping Castiel's back, if he could feel anything, he knew his wings were still intact. Cas seemed to be pushing harder into his lips, trying to get him to lay down, Dean let his back reside on the cheap bed. Now Cas removed his lips slowly from the others, they were half on, half off the bed now. Cas slid off his trench coat and let it fall to the floor, his face was blank and he looked so serious now. Dean could feel himself stiffen by this look, this was the look that he always got before he got laid.

"You're helping me already." Dean replied, gulping down the saliva that reside inside of his mouth. Cas slid himself off of Dean, his suit still intact; slipping off the black jacket he let fall to the floor, Dean stared in awe at him was this a strip tease? "Remove it." Cas said jerking his head at Dean's shirt.

"What?" Dean questioned his eyebrows narrowing, "Removed the jackets.." Cas trailed off standing full as Dean slowly moved his hand to the over coat. Cas reached his hand forward gripping his wrist, making Dean look at him confused. The angels lips parted as he half sat on Dean's lap, sliding off of the overcoat, still staring deeply into his eyes.
Next came the shirt of Dean's, Cas let his hand slowly slide up his body gripping onto the fabric that stood between his chiselled chest. After it was pulled off, Cas held it in between his fingers, chucking it across the room where it landed near the doorway. Moved his hands up to Cas' tie, where he pulled it off and let it fall to the floor, his fingers almost anxiously getting to his prestin white buttoned shirt.

Each time his hand unbuttoned the shirt Cas gripped his arm harder, until Dean slid off the shirt and let that fall to the floor as well. Cas stared down at Dean from being propped up by his knee, and Dean slid on the bed more, where Cas moved with him to lay onto the bed. The eyes of theirs locked long and hard on one another, Dean hovered about where Castiel lay on the cheap bed. His back soon to be dug deep into the bed, but he didn't care. The person above him was all he could think about, the worry that possessed him at this moment.
Dean moved close to Cas' neck, where he let his lips press against the side of it, the veins in his neck pulsating with each gentle kiss.
The slimy tongue pressed against the smooth skin, where the scratchy bulb of it moved lathering his skin now in his own scent. Dean's hands were on either side of Castiel, his hands slowly touching his waist where he felt his skin and bants buckle. Out of sheer shock, Cas somehow quickly moved his hands onto Dean's exposed back. He wasn't sure was his reflexes were all over the place like this, but he had never experienced something like this before.

Dean sucked harder now onto his neck, almost sucking in the skin of Cas'. His breath grew warm, even on the cheap bed he felt like he was back in heaven again. Where everything around him was sometimes warm, hopeful, and secure. The safety of the gentle nips sent trickles of sweat down Cas' body, Dean started to move lower however, the kissing trailing down the sweaty chest of his. Until he felt something rub against his right leg. Castiel's eyes closed shut, as Dean was sliding lower down him he was rubbing the secret that sat between them. His member.

His hands were no longer on Dean's back, but they were at his sides in a gentle motion, Dean wasn't one to play rough in bed it seemed, he liked to make the moment special, sensual. Castiel had never thought about having a mate, or becoming one with another. And if he were to pick anyone, Dean was that person.

Dean's hands undid the belt where he whipped it off, and it made a smacking sound as it hit the ground. Slowly did he unzip the pants of Castiel's, sliding them off his body, the silk slid across his sweaty body, it was creating the most beautiful music.

Cas' hands spread out quick as he felt the cold air brush across his shaft, making his nails dig hard into the bed;

"D-Dean what are you doing?" Cas asked in a soft, yet fearful tone; he didn't know what was going to happen with this, and he was only expecting for the two to keep kissing. Was this sex? Was this what mating was like?

"Don't worry Cas.. I'm going to take care of you." Dean responded in the most careful tone, staring at the stiff shaft before him, it was hard and.. quite long. The heart in his chest pummeled like it was between cloth. His hands gripped the bottom area of it, and he could feel Cas' body stiffen under him. This was something new for the both of them. The lips parted, and soon his mouth was placed around Cas, it had various tastes, sweet, slimy, and something else he couldn't quite put his finger on. Castiel leaned his head into the pillow hard, opening his mouth wide, trying to fight some words to yelp, but all he managed was a large moan.

The moan sent chills down Dean's spine, it was so sweet, so innocent, and almost.. desirable. Not even Castiel knew what came from his mouth, it surprised him that he could make a noise like that.

Dean sucked on it, moving his mouth slowly up, and down on his member. He was starting to feel it, with every little suck, the scratchy tongue on his member, the whole mouth suctioning hime. Warmth engulfed his entire body, and almost a buzzing feeling slide to his lower abdominal area. Cas jerked his head forward as the rubbing became rough, his mouth was ajar as he was trying to speak. But little groans only slipped;

"D-D-Dean" he stuttered staring into the eyes of Dean's, who looked up at him, a grip still on shaft; "Cas are you okay?" He questioned in utter concern, the face of Cas was red, sweaty; every drop dripping from his face, they hadn't even gotten to full course yet.

"I feel warm." Was all Cas could say staring harder into the green eyes, Dean was very confused, he had stopped him for that? "Uh-" he could only breath, realizing just how warm he- himself felt.

Realizing that he gripped his jeans and slowly pulled them off, the heated legs of his feeling free as the cloth no longer stuck to his skin like it was apart of him. Cas' breath grew slow and almost thick like cream, staring at Dean more intently as he watched him remove the jeans and let them slide off the bed.

Castiel leaned forward and gripped the band of Dean's boxers. Cas was taking the lead now.

"Here let me help you.-" he offered, and Dean gently chuckled; "No I got it Cas- it's fine." he pondered back, trying to remove the boxers himself; but Cas leaned more onto Dean looking intent on removing them himself.

"No." was all he said, Dean's hands were shoved away by Castiels, it seemed like he wanted to play the dominant one in this case.

"Okay.." Dean said, feeling Cas' hands fumble sliding down the boxers. The two sat on the bed and Cas was hovering above him at the foot of the bed. He was having a hard time trying to slide them off, and the sweaty skin of Dean's didn't help it that he almost had to peel away the underwear.

Dean moved his hand to help slide them off, making Castiel move from the bed to slide them off of from his legs. They fell to the floor and Cas kicked them in front of the motel door where they would stay the rest of the night. Dean stared at the figure, Castiel stood before him, his posture perfect and his shaft standing tall and stiff.
The sweat sliding like a drain dripping water from the tip.

Dean placed his hand onto Cas who was pulled against his chest, his legs moving on either side of Dean. They only stared into one another's face, Castiel hands was placed onto Dean's cheek in a warm motion. The naked bodies of theirs rubbing against one another. Cas leaned his head on top of Dean's where he sighed, feeling his back spine, tracing every piece and figure of Dean's into his head.

"Dean.. you make me feel more human than ever." Cas mumbled closing his eyes, in which Dean was finally pulled back to reality. "Yeah- human or not Cas, I'll.." he trailed off, but Cas moved back and stared into his face;

"You'll?" he pondered tilting his head just a touch.

"I'll always love you, angel, human, and even if you think you've lost my trust. I will always." He said in a breath that was vanquished, tears almost spilling from his eyes. He loved him so much, losing him would be a greater pain than losing everything.

"Dean…" Cas said frowning almost, letting his face and nose press against Deans, feeling the wet tears. "The first day we met, I knew it. Angels are given signs Dean, and you were my true one. My mate."

Their lips pressed against one another, and they moved together, like one person onto the bed. Cas' legs were lifted up by Dean's hands slowly, where they were now on top of Dean's shoulders. They were ready. The moment was warm, the air was smoggy by their breaths and pants. His chest nearly heaving.

The stiff shafts, but this time it was Dean entering Cas, he was the one to pleasure him. Make him known. And let him know that he loved him, and will always protect him. His hands gripped Castiels cheeks between his fingers; making him grip the bed sheets once more tightly.

The fingers of Dean's moved slowly letting him feel more of Castiel before he stuck it in, in which he stared into the angels face. He seemed ready for it; still unsure, but he knew Dean would never hurt him.

Then he did it, slowly entering him hearing the puffs of air escape his lip like sweet music, the pressure that was forming with his long shaft made Castiel stiff for the first bit. Dean relax inside of him, making Cas also melt like a marshmallow with Dean inside of him.

His fingers twirled in the bed sheets, gripping them tighter; letting a lower growl escape his lips almost saying; 'I'm ready Dean'.

Dean pushed, letting his hips now do the work moved against the cheeks, the walls of him closing in tightly around his shaft, but in security. Castiel's legs that were now limp on his shoulders felt right. This is what he was meant to do.

He was intent now on his thrusting, the movements, the sweat that was like tears this required full concentration.

Castiel leaning his head hard into the pillow, almost back in a quick movement. He felt something coming.. something that was going to explode from him like fireworks. Dean moved back and forth, feeling the smacking of his skin against the others, it was like clapping your hands. But it was his abdominal area smacking against Cas' other end.

And he felt it, the thing that was bulging inside of the tip of his head, the secrets he spilt every day to himself when he thought of Cas. They weren't just going over his hand this time, they were going inside the thing they were meant for.

Dean panted under his breath, the saliva nearly spitting from his tense lips, and he let it flow. It spurred from him like fireworks, spilling inside of Cas; who let a large groan puff from him. The feeling of his warmth, it was enough to make himself cum as well. He didn't know how it felt, or what it was like; but the way it felt inside of him was enough to make him melt in pleasure.

Dean hinged forward over him still inside, his shaft moving around him. But a slight jingle of the keys made Dean looked to the door, but Cas must have not heard it he was too wrapped up from the feeling and panting under his breath with Dean still inside of him. Dean held his breath, and placed a hand over Castiel's mouth to shush him, but Cas only thought more was going to happen. The door opened and closed quickly, Dean couldn't see who came in. They must have been standing still at the door; the figure sighed and clothing could be heard being removed, a shirt was thrown to the floor. And pants were zipped down falling the floor. As well as some other garment.

Was this someone in the wrong room? Was all Dean could think.

The figure moved, but the boxers that laid near the door caught his foot, which made him stumble; "S-shit!" he yelped flying forward trying to catch his balance. But he smacked into Dean, sending him falling off the foot of the bed, exiting Cas who growled. The person who had tripped now laid on top of Castiel, his body bare from just removing any clothing at the door.

His breath sent chills down Cas' body, it was moist and hot; but his hands were on either side of him, tracing his body trying to figure out what it was. His hand then found it, it gripped his shaft hard; "Wha?" the figure questioned, but Castiel couldn't hold it back. The sticky white substance exited his shaft and sprayed, all over the person he thought was Dean.

Dean who was on the floor frantically stood grabbing the gun and flicked on the lights. The male who was now engulfed with Castiels cum took a slight lick, but looked over at the light switch.

"Dean?!" Sam panted, staring at his naked brother who lowered the gun, this wasn't awkward.

"Sammy?" Dean said shocked, the sticky white substance that sat on his brother's face slid down, 'Dammit.. that's supposed to be on me.' Sam let his hand touch the slimy liquid as he stared at it; "This.. what is-" he exhaled a long breath, slowly turning his head to see him. Castiel laying under him, almost looking shocked, scarred for life possibly.

"Hello- Sam." Cas tried to speak through a heavy breath, the heavy body of the tall man whipped his head back at Dean. What was going to happen now?! Sam thought Dean wasn't back at the motel, and he was going to take a shower, but he had no idea Castiel was here, with Dean!

"Whoops?" Dean responded shrugging his shoulders, making Sam's face grow stern. His nostrils flaring at this, they were supposed to be working, not having sex!

"Uh.. Sam? Can you get off me.. please?" Cas struggled under him, but Sam didn't move, he stared back at his hands, then back at Cas, than to his hands, and back at Cas.

"Wait.. this is your…?" Sammy spoke slowly, fear and embarrassment striking him. His face heating up to look like a tomato, as the only thing that could fall from his lips was one word;

"DEEEAAANNNN!"