Prologue

"May we meet again…"

Bellamy's final words to her. Ones she felt unworthy of. He'd forgiven her, as she had him a long time ago. The unbidden memory surfaced. How she'd loathed him then. The choices he'd made, the senseless murder of those three hundred…but she understood now, she saw how easy it was to fall by the wayside. For her, it had also begun with a massacre. Three hundred and some Grounders slaughtered, their flesh broiled from their bones, their corpses indistinguishable from the next. She'd believed herself justified. To save her people, she would have done much more.

And she had.

Finn.

Clarke choked back a sob as his image flickered beside her. Weeks had passed without sight of him. Now, she welcomed back his ghost with a haunted smile. At least she wasn't alone. His silent presence was comforting, somehow. He hadn't abandoned her.

At the time, she'd truly believed that he'd left her no other choice. Raven had so desperately wanted her to stick that knife in Lexa's heart. But what would that have accomplished? The Grounders would have slaughtered her and her people. She'd done the only thing she could think of to save Finn the pain and torment reserved for him. It had been the hardest decision of her life, at least until Mt. Weather.

God, the faces. She saw them now. Another massacre. Jasper…

Clarke stumbled over a root and toppled to her knees. She had to banish these thoughts if she was to make it to the bunker tonight. Bellamy had asked where she meant to go. At the time, she hadn't known. Now she did. The answer had come to her as she gazed over Finn's ghostly visage. There was nowhere else she wanted to be.

Resolved, she pushed to her feet and began the trek through the thick brush and Grounder-infested land. There was once a time when wandering through the trees would have terrified her. Now, there was nothing but emptiness within her—a yawning chasm devoid of emotion and life. If she came across a Grounder, so be it. Let them be sucked into the darkness alongside her.

She scrambled up a small hill, and once at the top, she paused and glanced back over her shoulder. The forest was too thick to make anything out, but still, she took a moment to say a final goodbye to her friends and family.

Still, it wasn't her mother's face that took form, but Bellamy's.

"May we meet again," she whispered before quickly dashing away her tears.

Bellamy paced outside the Ark's medical wing. How he'd become this person—this champion—he'd never know. He paused and slanted a glance down the hallway. He did know.

Clarke.

She'd taken a selfish, frightened boy and made him into someone worthwhile. Her faith in him had inspired him to take chances, to be brave, to fight for a single life. He'd stolen onto the drop ship with only his sister in mind, and as a result, he'd grown into something so much more.

And he had her to thank for that.

He would not let her down.

"Anything?"

Bellamy turned at the sound of Sinclair's voice. Ever the sentry, the man came by every fifteen minutes to check on the patients. "Nothing yet."

Together, they turned toward the divider and waited patiently. Raven and Abby had been one of the first swept away by the medical staff. Bellamy's jaw tightened at the thought of the torture they'd undergone, all for their bone marrow. It had brought him no pleasure to irradiate level five of Mt. Weather, but he wouldn't allow the guilt of what they'd done to eat at their success. Their people were alive and safe, most of them, anyway.

"I bare it so they don't have to." Clarke's voice whispered through his thoughts.

Bellamy sighed and whipped a hand through his rumpled hair. Neither of them had wanted to make that choice, but Cage had left them no other choice. Bellamy's only regret was that the bastard had escaped.

The curtain fluttered and Sachin appeared. Haggard, he dabbed the back of his hand against his brow. "They'll be all right. They just need rest."

Bellamy nodded. They all needed a little rest. A few days without any disasters or emergencies would do them all good. Of course, he still had to deliver the news to Abby.

"How many returned with you?"

Bellamy shook his head. "We never got a final count. There were casualties, though."

Sachin nodded. "I gathered. Abby is asking to speak with Clarke." His eyes darted around the hallway. "Is she here?"

Bellamy swallowed, his stomach lined with dread as he imagined this conversation. Rather than respond, he swung his gun over his shoulder and pushed his way through the curtains.

Abby's face brightened for a brief moment before a slight frown puckered her lightly lined brow. "Clarke?"

At a loss for words, Bellamy stood facing her bed and shook his head. "She isn't here."

"Where is she?"

If only he knew. Though he'd never admit it aloud, he felt an uncanny pull toward her. It stunned him to realize that he wanted to leave the Ark and seek her out. Odd how someone he had once despised had become his closest friend. The ground had a way of doing that, of taking the person you were and twisting them into something else. For him, it had made him into someone who fought for others. For Clarke, it had turned her into a leader and forced her to make the hard decisions. He'd told her once that it sucked to be in charge, but it had been worse for her. The weight of the treaty had rested on her shoulders. She had been the one to seal the truce in Finn's blood.

"Clarke…" Bellamy released a shaky breath. "…left."

Abby blinked before fresh tears slipped down her filthy cheeks.

"Where did she go?" Raven murmured from her own bed.

"I don't know. She didn't know."

Abby fell back against the bed and stared up at the ceiling. "I put too much pressure on her. I was just so afraid that I'd lose her."

"It isn't your fault," Raven said. "She'll come back."

Bellamy arched a brow. Would she? He felt the twist in his stomach at the thought. He wanted her back, wanted to show her that they would forgive her for her choices, but he, more than anyone, understood that sometimes it was best to be alone.

"The drop ship," Abby murmured. "We should send a team, they can scout for her."

"No."

Both women propped up on their elbows and stared at him.

"What do you mean, no?" Abby demanded. "She's my daughter. She belongs here."

Bellamy sighed and leveled the Chancellor with a weighty stare. "What would you say to her?"

Clarke's mother swallowed, her dark eyes flitting between him and Raven. "That it wasn't her fault. That we understand—"

"No, you don't." He straightened and stepped closer to the foot of her bed, his stare unwavering. "None of you do."

"But you do?"

Better than anyone. "You weren't there, Abby. You didn't see her face when she…" His voice fell flat. "I helped her pull the lever to irradiate level five. I stood back and allowed her to kill President Wallace. It's not your forgiveness that she needs."

"Then what?" Raven asked, her voice angry.

"She needs to forgive herself," Abby whispered.

Bellamy didn't want to stand around discussing this. He had his own atonement to seek, but he had to make the Chancellor understand, his final gift to Clarke. "I was there with her. I saw the toll this war has taken on her. She's stronger than you, Abby. And braver than me. She just needs time."

And time was something they could give her. He only hoped that was the only thing she needed. He met Raven's gaze, silently pleading with her to understand. Her gaze lowered to her lap and she nodded. Everyone knew how much Finn had meant to Clarke, and Bellamy suspected that guilt would be the worst of all.

He'd envied that boy, once. To have someone like Clarke gaze up at him with such open adoration. But it was hard to envy the dead.

She just needed time. And they would give it to her.

AN: I recently watched this show and fell in love with Bellamy and Clarke. Of course, who didn't, right? So welcome to Heaven's Door. Hope you enjoy :)