By
The Kendo Bunny
How long has it been? I met Spike, fell in love
with him, lost him… fifty years ago today. That's funny. It feels like
it was just last week. Things change in fifty years, just like you'd expect
them to. Ed is a grandmother… It was hard enough to think of her as a bride,
but a grandmother! And Ein and Jet… I guess they're keeping Spike company.
Me? I figured you'd ask that. Did I pay off my debts? Did I ever get married?
What am I doing?
I paid off my debts so long ago… though years
after I met Spike. Jet helped a lot… he treated me like his little sister
for the first few years. I didn't have the heart to take advantage of him,
but we got everything paid off in the end. And after Jet… well, he gave
me a nice parting gift. He said the Bebop was the only thing I hadn't tried
to steal, so he'd give it to me, and any money he had saved to Ed. It's
been almost twenty years since then.
For your second question, well, no. I'm just not the marrying type. Like I said, Ed got married, but me? Never. Jet had a few girlfriends over the years, but he never settled down either. We just buzzed around looking for bounties. No time for romance. And even if there was… well, we didn't think of each other that way. I was in Ed's wedding though. I never thought I'd ever meet anyone as crazy as she was, but her husband certainly proved me wrong. I guess I should have known she wouldn't have settled for anything less. And their kids! They had two, a boy and a girl, though you can hardly tell by looking at them. It looks like two boys, or maybe two girls, depending on how you look at them.
As for what I'm doing, I'm going to bed. I'm
definitely not as young as I used to be. Include the fifty years I was
frozen, and I'm 123 years old. I need my sleep. So, goodnight.
"Faye, wake up," a quiet voice said.
"Huh? What?" I looked up. "Spike?"
He smiled slightly. "You drifted off again.
You sure this stuff isn't too strong for you?"
He tapped the half-empty glass in front of
me.
"Or are you just drinking too many?"
I frowned and looked around. It was a bar,
like thousands of others I had been in. The same array of alcohol, the
same dim lighting, the same gamblers… The music was different, though.
It sounded kind of familiar…
"Mr. Saxophone?"
"Gren's been playing here for years, even before
I started coming. You can't say you're surprised."
"No, not surprised… just took me a second to
remember who it was."
"I'm kind of surprised you remember it at all.
We all thought you'd come earlier."
"We?"
"The regulars… Gren, Jet, even Julia wondered
about you."
"So Julia's here…" I said quietly.
"Where else would she be?" he asked. "This
is where people like us belong."
"Where is this then?"
"The only place for people like us. This is
where all wandering souls meet."
"Souls, huh?" I shook my drink around in my
glass. In doing so, I noticed my hand. My eyes widened as I raised my hands,
marveling at the smooth, soft skin. I looked down at the rest of my body.
Exactly as it had been 50 years ago.
"What's going on?"
"I forgot… you grew old. This place shows you
how you perceive yourself," Spike pointed at Gren. "Take him for example.
He used to be 34-C, but here he's a complete man," he gestured at his eyes.
"Take me. You remember what my body looked like… one of my eyes was fake.
They're both real now. You still see yourself as a 23-year-old gambler
with a bad attitude. So that's what you are."
I stared at him. "You mean I'm… dead?"
He shrugged. "Only if you think you are. We
live in our own way."
"Does that mean… do you still love Julia?"
He was quiet for a long time.
"It was love… but it wasn't love that spanned
eternity. Or maybe it is and is just taking a vacation. What I felt for
her in my other life… some things you can't take with you. I died loving
her, wanting her, needing her. A devotion to the dead. But when I joined
her… it was like a star, flashing into a beautiful supernova, then slowly
growing dimmer. It's hard to hold on to life's feelings here, Faye. You
make yourself believe that all you needed in life you would continue to
need in the next life. But it isn't true. It doesn't hold."
I looked at him, at the face that had never
really died in me. "So… where is she now?"
"She comes and goes… like she always did. Sometimes
when she comes back the life is so strong around her that it feels like
we're the only two people who were ever truly alive. But sometimes she
reminds me that I never lived my life. I didn't even have thirty years
before it was taken from me. I think I remind her of that much more often.
It's not like Vicious. He changed in the afterlife… he's living out eternity
the way he should have lived out his human life. Some people are like that…
they're dead in life and alive in death."
I nodded. "Spike… do you believe love can exist
after death?"
He was silent for much longer this time.
"I don't know," he said at length. "It might…"
his eyes closed in thought as the last haunting notes of Gren's song echoed
through the room.
My own eyes closed as I leaned against Spike's
shoulder.
"Play it again, Mr. Saxophone," I said softly.
"Play it for me one last time."