Same old way:
"Talking"
'Thinking'
"Wooah! What the hell is happening?" a man's voice yelled. He felt himself falling, all in darkness. He landed with a thud. It felt like he had fallen from a great height, but he felt no pain as he brushed himself off.
"Where am I?"
His eyes turned upwards to locate the origin of his descent, only to be stung by newly-visible sunlight. After his eyes adjusted he opened them to find himself inside a township. The man heard people all around him, their cries somehow familiar. Sales people asking passer bys to buy their fresh fruits and vegetables, cooked food and inns calling to traveller's to rest their heads for a night.
Why did these voices sound like he had heard them before, he thought?
None of the people bothered the man as he looked around the township's buildings. He was positive that he was still in Japan, but this town surrounded by forests wasn't any place he had been before. Then he saw high cliffs above the village. Strange shapes were carved into the rock formation he waited for the sun rays to subside then he was speechless. He touched the ground and it felt real. He pinched his cheek and it hurt. The man stared in bewilderment sure enough he was looking at konoha's Hokage monument. First, Second, Third and Fourth. They were all there, he squinted rubbed his eyes, looked again and called out loudly, "What!?"
Another person in this situation might have fainted from shock, but the man just laughed oddly and talked to himself.
"There must be some explanation! I'm not going to be driven to madness, although my editor and assistants think I've gone there already."
'Calm down and think; what's the last thing I remember? I was at my desk note taking, sketching, working on the Namefor that damn editor and then… I don't know'
The man walked along a street 'who would I bump into? Would they know me?' he thought anxiously
As he walked along an alleyway he noticed missing posters
'Lost: pet cat called Tora. Genin sent, but found no trace. Reward offered'
There were posters of more than a dozen animals and several villagers.
"Hello there!" The man jumped as a voice boomed from behind him. "Yes", continued the voice, "a lot of mysterious goings-on lately. I'm a policeman, so I should be looking for these villagers. But who knows where disappearing people go to, eh? Maybe they are just inconsiderate. Do you know anything about these things? Officer Jiraiya's my name"
The man's eyes widened and he had trouble getting his breath back. This couldn't be possible. "Jiraiya of the sennin?"
Jiraiya laughed heartily. "Yep! I don't use that name now, though. And who would you be, stranger?"
The man paused for a moment obviously he wasn't recognised he could use any name he wanted
"Himura Kenshin" the man decided to give an anime name instead there may not any harm in using his real name but just to be on the safe side…
"So Jiraiya san, I don't really know this village very well seeing as you're a member of the police force and all, maybe you can tell me of some good places to eat and sightsee?"
"Well, I suppose that I can do"
As they walked, the so called kenshin felt something was off about Jiraiya
"Hey I heard this village has nice hot springs. They're meant to really relax your muscles"
"Oh that's an idea, I've got some spare time how about we go there together"
They went inside the hot springs the man looked through a hole once inside looking into the woman's baths expecting Jiraiya to do the same
"What do you think you are doing? That is despicable, how dare you do that in my presence!"
So called kenshin was taken aback by Jiraiya's outburst. He would have thought he would join in
"Oh it's a good sight, you don't know what you're missing good for your research"
"My research?"
"Yes, aren't you a writer who writes about well… You know"
"Huh, I think you may have me…"
The man interrupted Jiraiya mid sentence "Think of this line in the book 'He threw her on the bed with brutal force and huskily whispered sexual threats into her ear, which made them both tingle'" he said in a menacing tone
"How dare you! I am a happily married gentleman!"
"Married! To whom?"
"Tusande, we have three kids"
"You're married to Tusande the one with the big jugs? Oh man doing it must be a blast, watch your eyes though. Boing, boing" the man said making large breast gestures with his hands
"Damn you!"
The man felt the punch, somewhat after realising he was flying out of the hot springs. He went a fair distance coming into a felid, landing on his head knocking him unconscious.
He woke up a few hours later the sun had set he checked himself over
"Huh no bruising, did that really happen? Hmmm" he shrugged "must've nothing happened"
He got up and began to make his way through a forest clearing, which would lead him back towards the village. It had gotten dark quickly he was just navigating his way through when he heard
"Naruto, why did you take the scroll?"
"Mizuki Sensei told me about the scroll and this place I pass now, right?"
'I'm in the first chapter? Impossible!' thought the man. He rushed to the scene making no noise and hid in the shrubs, watching it all unfold thinking he knew what was to take place line by line, scene by scene.
"That's why everyone hates you." Mizuki roared "you're the Nine Tails Demon fox that attacked the village"
The man looked towards Naruto to see the shocked look on his face but instead he was greeted with a look of boredom?
"Awww" Naruto whined, "I already knew that, and here I am getting all pumped up thinking you were going to tell me something interesting"
The so called kenshin was shocked 'what is this?'
"Don't mind it eh? You damn demon!"
"No I don't mind it at all actually. Kyuubi and I are best friends" Naruto said in a chilly tone
"Best friends? Die you grotesque excuse for a human child!"
Mizuki pulled out a shuriken and hurled it at Naruto at a ferocious speed. Having only a second to act Naruto grabbed the injured Ikura and used him as a shield killing him
"Demon, rotten demon!" Mizuki called
"He was going to die from the injury anyway. May as well speed up the process"
The man covered his mouth with a hand his eyes were wide with shock, only one thought was going through his head 'what the fuck, what the fuck'
"You Bastard Demon"
"Yes that's right. I only played the part of class clown and a boy bullied by the villagers for housing Kyuubi. But, in reality I know all there is to know about being a killer" Naruto ended his sentence with the same cold tone, he then had a homicidal grin spread across his face
"Hmmm, what should I do first Mizuki Sensei? Should I rip out your lungs, Perhaps your heart? He, he, he, your brains will look nice splattered against all of these trees"
Mizuki trembled at the realisation of the situation that he was in. Naruto was excited, aching for a kill. He towered over the prostrated Mizuki but then he put his hands up to his head in frustration
"No, no, no I can't kill him" Naruto screeched
Mizuki sat still, was Kyuubi controlling this child? And was the child trying to regain control?
"With this kunai" Naruto continued "It's not sharp enough, I do want his insides on the outside after all!"
A strange sound was heard it was in between a growl and a hungry stomach rumble. Naruto looked down at his stomach
"Yes Kyu, I know you're hungry but we have to skin him first"
Mizuki's last terrified thought was 'He can talk to it?'
The man, so-called kenshin, clasped his hands over his mouth to keep from making a sound, as he saw Kyuubi charka coming out of Naruto. Mizuki died instantly as his heart got ripped out. The man closed his eyes tightly but he could still hear the frightening sounds of an animalistic feeding frenzy.
Note: End of chapter one. Like it, hate it? Give me your comments! I'm going to reveal the true identity of our mystery guest in next chap! I've left some clues so if you've figured out whom it is, please don't ruin the fun for me. ^ ^