Meet the Kowalski Family, a bully fanfic

"Meet the Kowalski Family"

By: Seinasu

"I can't believe I let you talk me into this," Petey grumbled as he forced his way up the driveway with Jimmy beside him. "There's nothing interesting about my home."

"You get to live off campus," Jimmy replied as he walked with his hands behind his head. "At least you have your own TV, computer, and your own space. You have it made."

Petey shook his head. "I don't think you understand my situation... My dad's just a boring librarian and my mom... well... I don't wanna talk about her."

He abruptly stopped and gestured to the house that stood before him and Jimmy. "There it is," he said simply.

A modest looking two story home sat before Jimmy. It resembled the many houses that were scattered throughout the town of Bullworth. But this particular home wasn't as grand but it also wasn't without its charm. It had a white picket fence that surrounded the property, lawn jockeys adorning the freshly-cut green lawn and a couple of small wind chimes hung on the front porch.

"This comes from a librarian's salary?" Jimmy asked as he threw a sideways glance at Petey.

"My mom helps out too," Petey admitted softly. "I just hope she's not home."

"Huh? Why?" Jimmy turned and faced his friend. "What's wrong with your mom? She hit you or something?"

Petey shook his head in objection. "No! She doesn't! She'd never hit me! It's just..."

Before he could finish his sentence, the front door flew open and a gorgeous looking woman with tanned skin and long, thick black hair appeared. Jimmy's eyes grew as round as saucers as he noticed her full red lips, smoldering brown eyes, and curvy body. Despite the plain t-shirt and Daisy Duke shorts she wore, she was anything but plain looking.

"BABY!" the woman cried as she bounced away from the door, off the porch and made her way to Petey. She threw her arms around the boy and pushed his head between her bountiful breasts. "You're home early! You didn't tell me or Papa! You're so terrible!"

Petey's arms flailed about as he tried to push his face out of her breasts. Jimmy could only stand back and think how he'd give anything to trade places with him at that very moment. At last, Petey pulled himself free but his face was completely red.

"I can't believe you did that to me in front of Jimmy!" Petey yelled, on the verge of breaking down and crying.

"Jimmy?" The woman blinked and gazed curiously at the said boy. A second later she gave him a sultry smile. "You must be Baby's friend! You have no idea how happy Papa and I were to hear that he made a friend at the academy!"

"Er..." Jimmy glanced over at Petey and asked, "Baby? Papa?"

Petey groaned aloud but managed to gain his composure long enough to make the introductions. "Jimmy, this is my mom, Priscilla. Mom, this is Jimmy Hopkins."

"So nice to meet you," Priscilla purred as she held out her hand.

Jimmy took her hand and shook it graciously. Jesus Christ, Petey's mom is HOT. Why hadn't he mentioned her before? I wonder if his dad's some good looking, buffed up model who's also some brainy librarian?

"What are you doing home?" Petey asked after his mother took her hand back. "I thought you were staying in San Fierro."

"I decided to take my vacation a month early and come back home," Mrs. Kowalski replied cheerfully as she went back to Jimmy. "I just have to say again that I'm so happy my baby brought home a friend! Papa and I needed our space at home so we thought sending Baby to the academy would do him some good and maybe help him with his social skills. I knew he'd one day bring home a friend!"

"Uh-huh," Jimmy said as he nodded his head. "So... You don't live at home?"

"Not all the time. My career demands that I travel to different parts of the country and show my stuff off!"

"... Come again?"

"Let's go inside," Petey said hastily as he grabbed Jimmy by the arm and managed to pull him away from his mother and inside the house. Through the living room and up the stairs, down a hallway, they arrived inside Petey's room.

"How come you never talked about your mom before?" Jimmy asked as Petey closed the door and locked it. "She's HOT!"

"Because she's very embarrassing," Petey pointed out. "Did you forget how she greeted me?"

"Lucky man."

"W-What?! Hell no! If your own mother did that in front of your friends, wouldn't you be humiliated?"

Jimmy shrugged. "She's never around enough to do it and when she is, she's feeling guilty about something..." He decided to change the subject. "So this is your room, huh?"

Petey's room was nothing spectacular. If anything it was rather plain: white walls, a bulletin board with some messages scribbled on it, a TV, desk with a computer, bed, dresser, and a rug.

"No posters or nothing?" Jimmy asked as he stared at the white walls.

"I had a Future Racer poster but Dad made me throw it out. He said video games rot your brain away."

"And you actually listened to him?"

"No, not really, but I'd rather not have the poster than have him complain about it every day."

Jimmy scratched the side of his head. "Didn't you say your dad was a librarian?"

Petey sat down on the side of his bed and said, "Yeah."

"So..." Jimmy turned around and asked Petey straight up, "how in the hell did he land a hot piece of ass like your mom?"

"J-Jimmy!" Petey cried in mortification. "Don't say that stuff about my mom!"

"Don't lie, Petey! You know she's hot."

"She's my mother. NO WAY. And I don't know how they got together! It's embarrassing enough seeing the two of them together. At least when I talk about my home life I can mention having a father because even though he's extremely dull, he's got a normal occupation. My mother... I can't tell anybody about my mother or what she does!"

"What does she do?" Jimmy raised a curious eyebrow. "She a stripper?"

"Exotic dancer," Petey corrected under his breath. In a louder voice he added, "She doesn't take her clothes off. She dances for sleazy guys who'll give her the time. She goes around the country to different clubs and fills in for girls who're sick."

"Damn. To think she's married to a librarian. Say, where is your dad?"

"Probably at the library. He does the standard nine to five shift so you won't get to meet him."

"Is he good looking like your mom?"

Petey turned pale and looked about ready to vomit. Wordlessly he climbed off his bed, took Jimmy by the wrist, and led him out of the room after unlocking his door. He walked halfway down the hallway and stopped to a picture that was hung on the wall. He pointed to the portrait of his mother and father side by side holding hands. Jimmy noticed what little clothing Mrs. Kowalski wore but Mr. Kowalski looked like nothing more than the average Joe: average height, average looks, salt and pepper hair, visible beer belly, black bifocal glasses...

"THIS guy landed your mom?" Jimmy inquired with disbelief. "I'm starting to think maybe I have a chance with landing someone hot."

"You're much better looking than my dad," Petey remarked without looking at him. He suddenly caught himself and felt his face grow hot. "Um... I mean, you know..."

"Yeah, I know you dork," Jimmy chided as he ruffled Petey's hair. "I'm a stud."

Downstairs the front door slammed shut, followed by the shrilled cries of Mrs. Kowalski.

"What was that?" Jimmy asked as he gave Petey a strange look. "Sounded like a cat got ran over by a car."

"Ugh," Petey groaned. "Dad's home early. Dammit."

"C'mon, then," Jimmy said as he started walking down the rest of the hallway. "I wanna meet the so-called boring librarian."

"Ugh," Petey said again as he hurried after his friend. Down the flight of stairs, they arrived just in time to see Mrs. Kowalski practically hanging all over the average looking Joe that was Mr. Kowalski.

"Good afternoon, Peter," Mr. Kowalski formally greeted his son as his arm rested around his wife's slender waist. He was dressed like a typical librarian—cardigan sweater, khaki pants, and sensible shoes. He looked like someone who could've been Mr. Roger's next door neighbor. "Ah, I see you have a friend over?"

Petey sighed and looked extremely uncomfortable, but never the less made way with the introductions as he did with his mother earlier. "Dad, this is Jimmy. Jimmy, this is my dad, Joseph."

"Pleasure to meet you, sir," Jimmy greeted as he and Mr. Kowalski shook hands. Jimmy couldn't help but notice how weak the older man's grip was.

"Likewise," the librarian replied as he released his hold on his wife. Bending down some, he spoke to Jimmy as if he was a shy little boy who lost his mother. "Do you like books, Jimmy?"

"Not much of a reader," Jimmy admitted.

"Well, since you're the first friend Peter has ever brought home, I would like you to have a free library card."

Reaching into his back pocket, Mr. Kowalski brought out a not-so-special looking library card. Jimmy took it with a confused look on his face and placed it in his back pocket.

"I thought all library cards were free," Jimmy wondered aloud.

"This one will allow you to keep the books you borrow for an extra week," Mr. Kowalski explained, adding extra emphasis for the extended week and looking so very proud. "Books are so wonderful! They take you into worlds you could only dream of visiting!"

"Dad, no," Petey pleaded quietly. "Not now..."

"Papa is so smart and brilliant when he talks," Mrs. Kowalski gushed as she pressed herself against her husband. "Mmm... OH! I missed you so much! We have much to catch up on!"

As if she just noticed her son and Jimmy standing there for the first time, she leaned forward and said to them, "Mama and Papa need to have some private time."

"Oh, gross!" Petey gagged. "You guys just got home! It's not even dinner time!"

"Go on," Mrs. Kowalski insisted as she opened the front door for them. "Go back to school and then come back around six for dinner!"

"You cooking dinner?" Jimmy asked as he was ushered rather hastily out of the house. "Then hell yeah I'm coming back!"

Petey could only whimper as he was practically throw out onto the porch and landed on his butt. The door slammed shut behind them and all was silent, except for the insane giggling going on inside.

"So... was this what you meant in the yearbook when you said your folks wanted you out of the house?" Jimmy asked as he helped Petey to his feet.

"I don't want to talk about it," Petey said miserably. "Let's head back to school."

"How's your mom's cooking?"

"It's actually pretty decent. She almost always cooks when she comes back from work. Otherwise it's just me and Dad... TV dinners all the way."

As they made their way down the drive way, Jimmy said, "I have a confession to make."

Petey's ears perked up at this point. "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah... I'm kinda jealous of you."

Petey stopped walking and stared at Jimmy. "Me? Jealous?" He sounded like he wanted to laugh at the very notion. "Of what?"

Jimmy turned around and replied, "You have both parents and you live in a nice house."

"My parents are insane."

"At least you have both of them in your life, even if one of them is always off traveling. They seem to care about you very much."

"I guess..." Petey's voice trailed off. He was already aware of Jimmy's broken home: his mother was constantly re-marrying and his real father—he didn't know where the guy was. He asked him one time and Jimmy got so heated over it that he destroyed half of the furniture in the common room. That's when he took it upon himself to never to bring up that subject again.

"We are coming back for dinner, right?" Jimmy asked.

"Huh? Oh... Yeah, sure, Jimmy. We'll come back."

Petey smiled sadly as he followed his friend away from his house and over to the nearest bus stop. He felt bad for Jimmy, even if he was rough around the edges. At least this was a way for the two of them to become closer. But then he worried about Jimmy resenting him for having a more stable home life... stable meaning having a boring librarian for a father and an exotic dancer for a mother.

"Yo, Petey," Jimmy called out as he stopped by the bus sign. "We can start hanging out here, can't we? Your home's pretty cool."

Petey's jaw dropped as his eyes grew wide with interest. Hang out? He and Jimmy? At his house? He'd never had a friend to bring home before! His insides swelled with joy as the thought of him and Jimmy spending more quality time together. He hated how the other kids from the other cliques constantly took Jimmy away from him. Jimmy was his first real friend and pretty much his best friend. It was jealousy at its best but he would never admit it to anybody. However, at this moment, he felt quite happy with what time he did spend with Jimmy.

"Petey! Bus!"

Jimmy's voice snapped Petey out of his daydream. Without hesitation he scrambled over to Jimmy's side as the bus pulled up and opened its doors.

THE END

Author's Note: Yeah, this is a major exaggeration on my part about Petey's parents. I have no idea what they're about so I thought this all up in one day while I was at work. Please let me know what you think!