SATURDAY, SUNDAY

A "Lofty Dreams" vignette - Hunsford from Will's POV

Chapter 1: Saturday

On Sunday morning, Will lunged forward on his right leg in order to stretch his left hamstring, and tried to calm his nerves. Where was Liz? She hadn't ever been late for their morning run. The sun would be up soon, which would diminish the impact of his carefully made plans.

He thought about the emotional roller coaster of the last week. It had been completely unexpected. He'd come to the LOFTY (Leaders of the Future: Today's Youth) Dreams retreat at Hunsford hoping to have fun and get to know both Anna and Liz better. They were both pretty hot, and if events led to more of a relationship with either one of them, he'd be satisfied.

Truthfully, he'd thought it was more likely to occur with Anna. Mike, Heather, Anna and he had been hanging out before the monthly LOFTY meetings, and Anna was definitely letting him know she was interested. But the week at Hunsford had barely begun before his interest in her started waning. For one thing, she was always trying to impress him, instead of being herself. For another, she and Heather liked to gossip and make fun of the other kids in the program. That was a real turn-off for him.

On the other hand, there was Liz. He'd thought she was beautiful from the first time he saw her. She had silky dark brown eyes and a smile that lit up her face with deep dimples and full lips that were just begging to be kissed. She was tall but feminine, with curves in all the right places, and had beautiful, shapely legs from running. Unlike with Anna, as the week went on, his attraction to Liz kept growing.

He was attracted to more than just her looks, however. He'd first realized it on Monday morning, when Liz had stopped running to look at the lake during the sunrise. He'd been enthralled as he watched her face while she admired a bird's gentle flight over the water. What had drawn him so much? It was the look of joy on her face. Something as simple as the sunrise and a bird had made her feel so happy.

When was the last time he had felt really happy? It had been at least two years. No matter how much he tried to joke around and act cool, an emptiness and sorrow had pervaded him since his father's death.

The sadness filled his home life also. Sometimes his younger sister Jenny was in a good mood, and they'd have great talks. She was one of the few people in his life, along with his godfather Marcus and his cousin Chuck, whom he could be open with. But at other times, dark emotions would overtake Jenny and she'd hide in her room for days on end. Trying to be strong for their mother's sake, Will had never admitted how much Jenny's depression scared him.

Then there was his mother. Although he knew his mom loved him and Jenny, she had always been a somewhat stern and business-like person. His dad had been the fun, affectionate parent. Since his dad's death, however, and especially since she'd learned about how his former foster brother George had taken advantage of Jenny, his mom had become bitter and angry about the direction her life had taken.

Because of his respect for his parents and his commitment to sports, Will avoided drinking and drugs. Thus, one of the few avenues of relief from his melancholy was sex. Girls of all races had always liked him. He knew he was good-looking and that girls were attracted to his "pretty eyes." Will had become sexually active not long after his father's death. Yet even that wasn't really satisfying. His emotions were fickle and his dating relationships short-lived. He'd had a girlfriend the previous summer with whom he thought he might get serious, but she was a year older than him. When she went off to college in the fall, their relationship fizzled out. Since then, he hadn't really dated anyone, because now he knew he wanted more.

He was hoping to find that with Liz. He loved spending time with her. She laughed easily, most often at herself. She was honest to the point of bluntness, but never in a mean-spirited way. She made him feel as though he could share anything with her.

On Friday, he had tried to stay out of a discussion about race relations in the LOFTY meeting in the morning, and later that afternoon got in a conflict with Abner, the only other African-American guy in the program, when Abner accused him of not knowing what it meant to be black. It reminded him of some of the fights he used to have with George, which were still a raw wound with him.

But Liz had helped. She'd left to follow him instead of staying with Abner in the weight room where the argument had taken place, and she'd called Abner a jerk for his behavior. He smiled, remembering it. Abner and Liz were good friends, and Will had wondered on more than one occasion whether they liked each other. But her response dispelled that particular fear.

Liz had asked him about the argument. "I'm not trying to put you on the defensive," she said. "I just wonder why race issues are so difficult for you to talk about."

Her gentle expression made him feel safe. "You know that I'm the only African-American guy in my class, Liz?"

"Wow," she said quietly.

"Yeah, there are two black girls, and me. So whenever anything about race comes up, it seems like my teachers or other kids always want me to answer for black people as a whole, or for black males specifically.

"I don't feel like I can do that. Despite what Abner says, it's not that I don't know I'm black or I'm not proud of it, because I am. I just don't feel like I can answer for anyone but myself. So I get tired of the topic. Does that make sense?"

"Yeah, it does," she said.

He had never been able to articulate these feelings before, and he wondered how she felt, because her opinion was important to him. "So what do you think?"

"About what Abner said? I think it's stupid," she answered. That didn't help, since he wasn't sure what she meant.

Liz must have noticed his perplexed look, because she explained further. "Everybody's different, Will. How can anyone say there's one set of experiences you have to have, or else you're not black? That's just silly. People should just be able to be themselves." She grinned at him. "Anyway, I don't think you look in the mirror and see a white guy, if that's what you're asking. Like you said, you couldn't grow up in Pemberley and not know."

Will smiled again as he remembered this. Liz had made him feel completely understood and accepted. That was why he'd answered her when she asked him about his father on Saturday morning. His dad was a subject he almost never discussed with anyone, mostly because he was afraid of breaking down.

Liz had listened intently as he shared some of his memories of his father. He'd felt her sympathetic presence as he gave her a piece of his heart. Now he felt confident he could trust her with his whole heart.

Until now, he hadn't wanted to reveal his feelings. It was pretty obvious Anna liked him; Liz, he wasn't so sure about. She either ignored or didn't notice his attempts to flirt with her, including backing out of her promise to watch him run hurdles on Monday, and making plans with someone else—Abner of all people!—in response to his invitation to view the sunset. They'd had fun talking and getting to know each other, but Liz seemed to have the same easy rapport with most of the kids in the program. When you coupled that with all the slammed doors on his attempts at flirtation, he had no reason to think she considered him more than a friend.

On Friday afternoon, however, he'd hugged her after her great 200 meter dash in practice. He'd seen her sweet expression and felt the sparks between them when he held her, and he started to believe that maybe, just maybe she liked him as much as he liked her.

Saturday had been a crazy day, continuing to jumble his emotions. At lunchtime, Liz had canceled their afternoon workout and he'd snapped at her because of it. When he returned to the table where he had been sitting with Anna, Mike and Heather, all three of them were laughing.

"What'd you say to her?" Mike had snickered. "She looks like she's going to cry."

Will just shook his head, refusing to answer.

"That's what she gets," Anna added. "She shouldn't have come over here in the first place."

He turned to glare at Anna, who shut up immediately. He had tried so hard to hide his feelings for Liz, not wanting to get teased for liking someone who didn't like him back. But he was certain Anna knew, and that her ongoing nastiness toward the other girl was due to jealousy.

He'd bowed out of their afternoon plans, wondering, not for the first time, why he was friends with people whose company he so often found unpleasant. Heather was the least bad of the three of them, mostly just following Anna's lead. But he was sick of Anna's sniping at Liz, and as much as he had originally liked Mike because of the interests they shared in common, he had come to realize that the guy could sometimes be downright mean.

To calm down, he'd gone running. When he reached the lake, he sat down on a rock near the edge of the water and picked at blades of tall grass, trying to figure out how a day he'd had so much hope for had gone so wrong.

The problem began, he knew, with his petulant response to Liz's cancellation of their workout. He had looked forward to spending time with her on their last full day at Hunsford—but she had made it clear she wanted to be with her friends, not him. He was understandably disappointed, but his reaction was inexcusable. What if instead he had told her about his desire to spend time with her, or even asked if he could tag along with her friends? She might have been open to either idea. At the very least, he wouldn't have hurt her feelings, or made her a target for his friends' ridicule.

After moping for a while and accomplishing nothing except generating disgust for his stupidity, he decided to return to the dorm where he napped for the rest of the afternoon and woke up in time for dinner.

"I'm glad we're leaving tomorrow!" Mike said over a plate of manicotti. "I'm so sick of this place."

"Oh come on, it hasn't been that bad," Heather argued. "We've had some fun."

Mike snorted. "Okay, maybe a little. But man, I miss my car!"

Heather laughed. "Oh, me, too. And my friends, and my boyfriend."

"Oh, Conner," Mike teased her in a falsetto voice about the boy she'd talked about all week. "You're going to be all over him when you get back!"

Heather grinned and agreed, and then asked Anna what she missed abut home.

"I don't know," she answered softly. "My family, I guess."

Will looked at Anna curiously. She was oddly quiet and subdued.

"You're joking, right?" Mike asked Anna. "I know I'm not looking forward to having my dad get on my case again."

Anna shrugged, and Mike turned the question to Will.

"I'm not ready to go," Will admitted. Parts of the week had been really good. The morning workshops had been fun, and he loved being out in nature. His family used to be avid campers, but hadn't gone since his dad died. The week at Hunsford made him realize how much he had missed it. Most of all, Will had loved hanging out with Liz. Because of her, he wasn't yet ready to leave.

"Hah!" Mike said. "You've got to be sick of the freaks and geeks, right?" He tilted his head toward the group sitting a few tables away.

Will didn't answer, but looked longingly at the table where the other six LOFTY Dreams kids sat, talking and laughing. He envied them—they seemed to be having such a good time, and more important, Liz was with them.

"I know I am!" Heather laughed, but Anna just watched Will with concern. Maybe she was finally starting to realize that she had no chance with him.

When he stood up to drop off his tray and dishes on the conveyor belt to the kitchen, Liz approached him again. He held his breath, afraid she was mad at him, but exhaled when he saw her smile gently.

"I'm sorry about this afternoon, but thanks for understanding," she said. "We had a really good time."

He nodded, a little ashamed since he definitely had not been understanding.

"Are we still on for the morning?"

"Running?" he asked stupidly.

She grinned. "What else?"

He met her eyes, soft and sparkling with humor, and nodded.

Her face lit up in a huge smile. "Good! I'm looking forward to it!"

He watched her walk away, his face warm and his heart beating quickly. She was looking forward to the morning, to running with him. He had another chance!

As he started back to the dorm, Anna ran to join him. She remained quieter than usual, and he didn't attempt to make up for her lack of conversation. Finally, she blurted out, "Willyougotopromwithme?"

"What?" he asked. He didn't quite understand her.

Anna took a deep breath and tried again. "I wanted to know if you would go to my prom with me."

His first instinct was to laugh with derision and tell her he had no interest in going anywhere with her. But thinking about Liz and how sweet she had been with him, even though he didn't deserve it, restrained him. "When is it?" he asked instead.

He sighed with relief when she told him the date. "Thanks, but I can't," he said. "My own prom is the same night, and I already have a date."

"Oh," Anna said softly. She looked down. "Okay. I guess I'll see you back at the dorm then."

She picked up her pace and passed him, and was soon some distance ahead of him. Will wasn't sorry to see her go. He hadn't lied to her. His school's prom was that night, and he and Kayla, a long-time friend who served as senior class vice-president while he was president, had agreed to go together only if neither of them had another date. In other words, they were both free to cancel with one another if a better offer came along. The truth was, he didn't consider Anna a better offer. He wanted to save that spot for Liz.

He was already planning how he would ask her. When they ran in the morning, he would stop her by the same spot where they had first watched the sunrise together. He would tell her all the reasons why he liked her. He'd tell her how beautiful he thought she was. He'd ask her to dinner, the movies, prom, anywhere where he could spend time with her. And he'd kiss those beautiful lips of hers.

On Saturday night after curfew, when all the guys were hanging out in the hallway on their floor, poor Pete was getting razzed by the rest of them while he tried to work up the courage to ask out Kathy, one of the girls in the program.

"So what about you?" Mike had asked him. "Are you hooking up with Anna when this is over?"

"Nah, not interested," Will replied.

"Why not?" Mike asked. "She's ready to give you whatever you want."

That jerk Abner had to speak up. "I know why not. It's because you like Liz, right, Will?"

Will shook his head, trying to feign nonchalance. But he couldn't stop the smile that spread across his face.

"Look at your face!" Nathan had shouted.

Abner started laughing. "Dang, I was just guessing. I hit the bull's eye!"

Will let out several loud expletives as the razzing that had been directed at Pete turned on him.

Abner held up his hands and laughed. "Just so you know, I'm not your competition. I have a girlfriend back home. Liz and I are just friends."

Will wanted to roar in frustration. Abner knew he was jealous of him. Why couldn't he hide his emotions better?

Mike had remained quiet throughout. When the rest of the guys settled down, he asked, "What do you see in Liz?"

Will was taken aback by his critical tone. "Let's see, she's pretty and she's sweet and she has a nice body. Why are you asking?"

"What, do you plan to take her out to Pemberley or something? You think a girl from Longbourn City is going to fit in out there?"

Pete and Nathan looked a little astonished by the direction of the conversation, while Abner said, "Aw, no. I don't believe you just said that."

"I'll take her wherever I want to take her," Will retorted.

"You think your mother would approve of that? Come on, Will! She has street written all over her."

"You're pushing it, Mike," Abner said in a threatening voice.

"Stay out of this up, Abner," Will said. "Mike, who I decide to go out with is none of your damn business."

"What about Anna? Is she my damn business? Because she's my friend, and you've been letting her think you liked her. Now you're telling me you want to pursue ghetto girl?"

"Oh, HELL NO!" Abner shouted.

"SHUT UP, ABNER!" Will shouted back.

At this point, Pete went to summon Paul, one of the program's counselors, from his room. When he emerged, Will and Mike were in a shouting match. "Both of you, go to your rooms and cool down!" Paul ordered.

Will had brooded in his room that night. As obnoxious as Mike's opinions were, he was afraid the other boy might be right. Liz was from Longbourn City, a low-income inner-city neighborhood. Will lived in Pemberley, one of Meryton's wealthiest suburbs. Will's mother had grown up in Longbourn City and had told him horror stories of the place she'd vowed never to return to. But she'd allowed the old neighborhood back in when they'd taken in George as a foster child. George had brought the street life and all its dysfunction into their home, and his mom had sworn, "Never again." Mike was right; she wouldn't approve.

Then there was Janelle, Liz's sister. As beautiful if not more so than Liz, she had seemed like such a nice girl when his cousin Chuck first started dating her. After about four months, though, she had started messing around behind Chuck's back and had broken his heart. Is that what he would have to look forward to with Liz?

Now as Will waited anxiously for Liz to arrive for their Sunday morning run, he knew he still wanted her, still cared for her deeply. But he was no longer so confident that this relationship was meant to be.