This will be my first attempt at an EVA fic. I hope that it is somewhat entertaining, and I know that there might have been similar plots, but hey, what can I say? This is a one-shot for now, unless it is well recieved and I do sort of have ideas for a second chapter, but anyway, enough of my rambling. God, I really should have studied for that final tomorrow...

Disclaimer: Standard disclaimers apply, except for the inspiration. I was browsing a MySpace site, called Asuka for ever or something like that, and the song just hit a chord with me. Thought it was inspirational enough to write a little something about it. So kudos out to you whoever you are as the author of that site. And I don't own the song.

So Sick

Aidan Pryde

I don't know why she does this to me… Shinji thought idly as he stirred the wok he was slaving over for dinner that particular night. He had just finished sorting out what he thought his new roommate thought about him, then she went and thanked him for doing what he thought was right.

God, being male had its disadvantages.

A lack of "intuition" would be one. Shinji decided that he better abandon this train of thought before it took him over another cliff.

They often have a hard time trying to piece together the remains after the fire.

He stopped stirring the pot for a second, and a small smile worked its way on his lips.

I really must be loosing it if I start referring to my thoughts as victims.

Shinji let out a full, gut wrenching laugh, before he promptly clamped his hand over his mouth. He rather would not let any of his roomies discover him in a compromising position. Lord, they had plenty of ammunition against him to last seven years! They needn't any more.

His hands returned to the task of making dinner, while he wandered around in his mind for any other thoughts to spring up and demand tickets for the next train. While a small portion of his mind actually connected the fact that he could make dinner and, at the same time, let his mind wander, the majority found itself back on the Red Line Express. The passengers of this train were risking their lives daily on what most would call the most amazingly deadly roller-coaster ride in the universe.

Mentally picturing several different versions of himself, from businessmen Shinjis to blue-collar Shinjis, Master Shinji smiled again as he focused on the conversations occurring today on the Red Line.

"She has the most amazing way of radiating confidence! I would imagine that she has quite the business skills!" Business Shinji said. Worker Shinji, wearing denim overalls and a flannel shirt spoke up,

"Yeah, and the drive to finish any job! That kind of discipline would make the best worker!"

Master Shinji smirked again as the recent "job" the young lady in question had performed was above and beyond. Something caught his attention, however, and the smile fell from his face.

There was always this one Shinji, a guy around the Master's own age, who brought the Red Line into a frenzy every time he would board. Fortunately, or unfortunately for some, the new Shinji, cleared his throat.

Many of the train's passengers rolled their eyes and let out groans of protest, but this did little in the way of deterrence.

"She is the most CONFUSING being in the universe!"

The entire train stopped. Everything, passengers, conductor; the train itself stopped moving at the shear weight behind those words. They all looked at each other before coming to the same conclusion: He was right. Never before had this guy had ANYTHING good to say, but this time, he had a sudden burst of genus that the other patrons could not dismiss.

All the other passengers seemed to ponder this latest turn of events, and if they looked around, they would have noticed that the Red Line had actually made it to its' destination. That, in itself, was a feat the train on this particular track only managed to make once or twice before.

A few of the occupants soon did realize this, and they ran to the boy, hugging him and apologizing for the way they had treated him before. As soon as they departed, however, they stood looking at a large van with many antennas and a large satellite dish adorning the roof. In front of the van, stood a Shinji only a few had seen before. This Shinji was dressed in military fatigues and boots and held a confident aura that astounded the rest of the train yard. For there was room for only so many confident Shinjis in the town where they lived. Thankfully, no one noticed why everyone looked the same…

The young Shinji made his way from the train to the front of the crowd and cleared his throat again.

"No need for that, son," The military Shinji said, looking down at the boy.

"ATTEN HUH!" The cry rang out and as soon as the last sound came from his mouth, military Shinji was faced with the same number of passengers from the train, only they now sported uniforms identical to his own. The only difference being the rank indication on his lapels. General Shinji addressed his new "conscripts".

"Gentlemen, I know that the road here was hard, but you made it, and now you can focus on the real battle here."

One newly conscripted Shinji, with corporal's bars, raised his hand. "Sir? I was under the impression that the war was with the Angels."

The General sighed and shook his head. "What are they feeding you civvies? No man. You are in the middle of a war that has been raging for as long as time has existed."

Many of the troops gave him incredulous looks. "Look around. Smell the ashes of testosterone, men. We are LOOSING THIS WAR!"

The younger Shinji, who started the whole mess, now sported a shiny lieutenant's bar on his lapel, suddenly gasped, "OH MY GOD!"

The General smiled a bit and nodded, "Yes that's right. The war between men and women! T vs. E! Anyone want to guess at the odds we have going against us right here in our own "home"?" None of the soldiers said anything.

"That's what I thought. Our enemy is clever, cunning, and swift. Add the 'berserker' ability every month and you've got yourself one hell of a stubborn Charlie. We face 2 to 1 odds here gentlemen. But, before you go and soil yourselves, I have hope."

The faces of the troops stared at their commanding officer with nigh-contained excitement.

"We have appearance, and intelligence. That is what this puppy behind me is for. It is a forward operations control center. A CIC for our forces. We have complete control over our troops and all of our red-tape has been cut."

The young lieutenant almost jumped for joy at that last remark. No government to look over our shoulder? All decisions made here? It was like heaven in a fifty-ton mobile brick! With nuclear capability and A/C!

"Our first objective, gentlemen, is to observe our enemy!"

Shinji couldn't stand it anymore and burst out with a loud raucous laugh. He dropped the spoon he was using for dinner and fell to the floor in ecstatic pain. When the raging storm of guffaws finally settled into fit of giggles, Shinji was able to pick himself off the floor.

Yep. I think that I finally lost… He couldn't finish that thought, because before he knew it, he noticed that something was not right in his world. No one had come to see the Invincible Shinji loose it. The Devil had not left "hell" for some time now, and his guardian was busy making impressions of a bear in winter.

Yes something was wrong here, and he knew that it was going to be painfully wrong when he discovered his body moving unconsciously toward the door to "hell".

Normally, Shinji would avoid direct lines of travel to and from that restricted airspace, but for some reason today, he felt like taking risks. Or that's what his conscious mind told him. He had a sudden tremor of fear as he remembered the last conversation the General had with his troops.

Observation

That could only mean one thing. Shinji was not going to live through the night.

Surprising himself, he stopped only inches away from the shoji and tried to close his eyes. To his utter disdain, he found that he could not block away the soon to be death that he would face. No, his eyes remained stubbornly open and alert, taking in every detail of the thin wall between himself and a sleeping devil.

Come on, she's not ugly! In fact, she's the most amazing thing you've seen in your life! Along with Misato and Rei…

"Yeah but she just…"

Shut up and listen, Private. Shinji just stood ramrod straight and nodded. He didn't know what the hell was going on, but he could not fight the voice inside his head. It sounded so familiar too…

"General?"

Didn't I tell you to stow it, soldier? Anyway, you need to quit stalling and start doing your job. We can't do it for you… well actually, we could, but there wouldn't be any room for growth on your part, and I'm not about to let anyone in my command take the easy way out. Now, your mission right this second, is to covertly observe the ALS's behavior. We've been having our butts handed to us time and time again from this front, and by God, we are going to start pushing those krauts back! GOT IT!

"Sir, YES SIR!" Shinji didn't realize that he was shouting until he finished.

Don't worry son. I've got a direct audio feed. Why don't you try using your ears for a while. We'll contact you for an update before dinner. CIC, out.

"Oh… Kay…" When Shinji regained the ability to move on his own, he was about to turn and run, but a thought struck him.

"Why didn't she hear me yelling?" By that time, the blood that was rushing through his ears faded to a dull thumping and the sounds of music could be heard from the other side of the wall. It was a slightly bopping tune that carried a catchy bass rhythm. This was something that rarely, if ever could be heard from the room Shinji now stood before. He found himself entranced by the melody that he softly snapped his fingers with the beat.

Do do do do do-do… yeah

Gotta change my answering machine,

Now that I'm alone

Okay, that was more like her, but something was off. He continued to listen to the words as the flowed from an American's voice. He was grateful that he could understand the language, as his new roommate insisted on trying to "educate" the stooge. The next line threw him back for a loop.

Cuz right now it says that we
Can't come to the phone
And I know it makes no sense
Cuz you walked out the door

This was certainly interesting. Not at all like the Asuka he had grown to like. Wait, what the heck was that? Shinji thought that he was starting to loose it, but then his thoughts slowed and he knew that it was a true thought.

Private! You are deviating from the operation! Keep your attention focused on the enemy!

"Funny," Shinji thought. "I am." He didn't get to chase that thought any more as he listened to the rest of the song.

But it's the only way I hear your voice anymore
(it's ridiculous)
It's been months
And for some reason I just
(can't get over us)
And I'm stronger than this
(enough is enough)
No more walkin round
With my head down
I'm so over being blue
Cryin over you

He managed a small, "Hummf." when the issue of strength was brought up. He knew he had issues with being a coward and a wimp. Now if only he could take that good advice and run with it.


And I'm so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing you were still here
Said I'm so sick of love songs so sad and slow
So why can't I turn off the radio?

Gotta fix that calendar I have
That's marked July 15th
Because since there's no more you
There's no more anniversary
I'm so fed up with my thoughts of you
And your memory
And how every song reminds me
Of what used to be

Shinji took the words of the chorus to heart as he heard it again. It was like this guy took all of his own anxiety, fear, depression, anger, confusion, and balled it up into a nice clean message that was meant for him. The images of his father leaving him, Misato taking him in, but not ever telling him with conviction the reason for it, Rei, just being Rei. This song was definitely meant for him. He finished the rest of the song with a deep contemplation surrounding his body.


(Leave me alone)
Leave me alone
(Stupid love songs)
Dont make me think about her smile
Or having my first child
I'm letting go
Turning off the radio

"I've said that before. Well, not the child part, but the rest." He thought about why Asuka of all people would be listening to this. The string of choruses finished out the song while Shinji mulled over the reason Asuka would be listening to this in his head. The General and the boys in the CIC had a lot of info very suddenly, and they were capitalizing on that new influx.

Cuz I'm so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing she was still here
Said I'm so sick of love songs so sad and slow
So why can't I turn off the radio?
(why can't I turn off the radio?)

When the song ended, it left Shinji with an emptiness that he all too often felt. Steeling himself with a courage he knew the General would be proud of, he walked calmly back into the kitchen to finish dinner. He also took that time to gaze back in on his, "commanding officer".

The General was standing over a very sophisticated-looking holographic imaging table in the middle of the van and was pouring over the latest intelligence reports from the front. He smiled, and the others present noticed the look of shear glee he held on his face, made eerie by the holo-table's blue backlight.

"We have it boys. I think we have the ultimate weapon!"

The young lieutenant spoke up, "How can you be so sure, sir? I mean, you said it yourself, this war has been going on as long as time itself."

The General dismissed the comment with a wave of his hand. "We have been addressing this problem with the wrong viewpoint. I'll tell you what we are going to do…"

Shinji suddenly noticed that his view of the meeting was obstructed and he could no longer hear the conversations occurring in the recesses of his mind. He shook his head to try and regain the image, but the annoyingly comfortable warm darkness he felt over his eyes would not give into his demands.

Wait, warm? Emergency action plans that had been drilled into him since basic training took over and his body instantly stiffened, turned a more bright red color, and his vocal ability seemed to cease functioning completely. He felt as if he was trained by the entire French army.

A soft voice settled itself over his shoulder on its' way to his ear, and Shinji turned to butter. There was only one voice that could make him do that.

"The dinner smells pretty good," the sensual tones of a trained minx blew through Shinji's brain like napalm through VC. The CIC van could seriously be using it's anti-estrogen protection to its' fullest today. He actually had his hopes up; he did make dinner and thought that it was fairly decent, but the bomb was already dropped, and it was no dud. "Third Child."

And just like that, the air-burst bomb that was Asuka's arsenal was released, sending little conscript shinjis to meet their maker, or join the rest of the Red Line victims.

"AHHHH!" Shinji screamed and almost fell into the wok face-first. The sounds of Asuka's laughter followed his cry, and he suddenly stopped, paralyzed by the sound of her laugh.

It's never had that effect on me before… He thought that maybe this was some new attack the ALS army brought to the front, but soon, the calm voice of the General came through his mind.

Go with that feeling, son. He thought that he heard alarms blaring in the background, and a few other voices in panic, but he paid them little mind. We have the weapon, but it needs time to grow. Act on instinct from now on, and you should spare us enough time to launch it. The way I see it, we all come out of this winners.

Shinji mentally had a look of curious doubt on his face, but the General cut him off. And I do mean ALL of us. As soon as the voices were there, they were gone. Shinji was left alone, well not really alone, but in his mind. All that was left was the after effect of the ALS's air-burst bomb and the after shelling of laughter leaving a scorched earth landscape.

Alright, just what the hell is going on? Much to Shinji's chagrin, there was no answer, so instead he focused his eyes on the "real" world once again, and noticed Asuka staring at him. He felt the incredible urge to apologize, but instead turned back around to the counter, filled up a plate with the newly done wok, and handed it to the redhead. With a smile.

He looked up at her face and noticed the look of shock on the "opponent's" face.

Shinji then filled a plate for himself, and moved to the table in the kitchen. He set his plate down, moved his chair back to sit, but stopped. Asuka still had not moved from where she stood, plate in hand, and Shinji felt another extreme urge to run, or grab her plate and seat her.

WHAT! Where did that come from? Half expecting an answer, he noticed that Asuka was now looking at him, and though he feared personal injury, quite extensive personal injury, he managed to walk to her, take the plate of food from her trembling, yes trembling hands and lead her to the chair opposite his own.

As soon as she sat down, Asuka let out a, "Baka hentai," but it held little sting to Shinji. He wasn't paying too much attention to the words as much as to the sound of her voice. It did not carry the same weight as the previous scathing remarks he normally received from her, and that's when it dawned on him.

The General could catch more flies with honey than vinegar!

NO! BAKA! You like her, she likes you, what better than to make an alliance with the two warring nations against the greater evil? Are you that dense?

Needless to say, Shinji was not expecting that reaction.

"So, I need to be friends with her, because it would be of a tactical advantage in the war?"

No again. Jeeze, what part of just liking her don't you understand?

"Actually, I prefer that more than any tactical advantage excuse. I want to like somebody fro who they are, not what I can get."

We know that, that is why this seems like a stupid conversation, especially with yourself! Can I leave this matter in your hands now, Commander in Chief?

Shinji only took a few seconds to look into Asuka's face and decide what he needed to do.

"Affirmative, General." Although he knew that he acknowledged the request verbally, he did not expect Asuka to respond.

"That's right! And don't you forget who's in charge here, Third!"

Shinji chuckled slightly to himself and thought, "Oh, I won't. I won't."

SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

A few weeks had past since the "wok engagement" as the SI forces liked to call it, and progress was finally complete on the ultimate weapon they were slaving over. Shinji was home with Pen-Pen while Misato had a date with Kaji, and Asuka was sent on a blind date. Not that that mattered to Shinji, he knew that Asuka would either ditch the guy and try to find Kaji, or come home and sulk, uh contemplate life. Yes, he had spent long hours pouring over the intel gathered from the "WE", and he knew that the ASL forces were in disarray.

It was the perfect time to strike. Shinji pulled out his recently "acquired" mp3 player and put on his ear buds. The clock said that it was near 18:00 hours, and the delegates were soon to arrive for the peace talks. This in mind, he punched in the song that he memorized for days in advance and hummed along. Moving about the apartment, Shinji made sure that nothing looked out of place, and he managed to hook up his player to the large stereo.

Soon, very soon, was his mantra as he moved into the kitchen to finish preparing a light dinner for two. If Asuka had really ditched the guy and not wandered off to find Kaji, she would be hungry. But hunger could wait until after the peace talks.

Hearing the elevator "ding" down the hall, Shinji made a jump back to the kitchen and turned on the stereo. When the door opened, the redhead commander in chief of the ASL walked in to a dim-lit living room with a singing Shinji in the middle.

Do do do do do-do… yeah

Gotta change my answering machine,

Now that I'm alone
Cuz right now it says that we
Can't come to the phone
And I know it makes no sense
Cuz you walked out the door

But it's the only way I hear your voice anymore

With every word that he sang, Asuka felt her stronghold's walls begin to crumble, and finally disintegrate and a flood of ALS troops poured over the trenches to waiting SI conscripts, who were singing like sirens drawing sailors to their death, only these sirens were singing for their love to find their way.

When the song reached its' climax, Shinji noticed a very beautiful girl holding onto him with a possessive grip. He reached down and lifted her chin to look into her eyes.

"Asuka," Shinji asked with an emotionally thick voice, "I want you to know something." The angel in his arms gave a positive moan, and he took it as a sign to continue.

"I want you to know that I like you. Would you, by any chance, consider liking me too?" He waited with a hope so strong, that if rejected could lead to the genocide of the entire SI race. The vixen grasped him tightly before raising suddenly and planted a kiss on his cheek, finishing off her last armament with a slight, "Of course I like you back,"

Shinji's heart was beating so fast, that he didn't hear the air-raid siren going off across the plains of Ikari, before the last Soryu shell exploded and took a few conscripts from both sides to oblivion.

"My baka."

Well, there you have it. Let me know what you think!