My very first PH story! It was a fill for the Kink meme. I hope you enjoy it!
Prompt:Oz loves Gil, and mistakes Gil's devotion for love. Gilbert doesn't love him romantically, but goes along with it when Oz kisses him because he would never do anything to hurt him.
Lie to me
Oz loved Gil's smile. There was nothing that could make him happier than seeing a smile on Gil's face. Even though they weren't as bright as they used to be when he was younger, there was something charming in the way his mouth would slightly lift up, offering him a shy but sweet grin.
It was a sight that never failed to make Oz's heart flutter.
Oz loved Gil.
And he was pretty sure Gil loved him, too.
XxXxX
Over the years, many people had believed that Gil's feelings towards Oz were love. Many thought wrongly.
What he felt for Oz went way beyond friendship. The boy was not just a friend; he was his master, his sun, his life.
But that wasn't love. It was simply devotion, in its purest form.
The servant had never minded it when people mistook it for love, though; he understood that not everyone could comprehend such loyalty.
However, he wouldn't have thought that Oz would misunderstand these emotions as well. His master, who was supposed to know him better than anyone else…,
But as Oz pressed his lips against his own, he was forced to see that, indeed, he had made the same mistake as everyone else.
His body froze.
What should he do? How should he react? Did he have to-?
Before he could ponder on what would be the best reaction, Oz pulled back.
His emerald eyes were staring at him with a rare open weakness. In them he could read affection, but most of all, fear. Fear of being rejected. Fear of Gil not loving him.
"Oz, I-"
"I really like you." Oz interrupted him, and his body automatically stiffened.
"I really like Gil…"the younger continued, his voice hesitant and trembling. "But…If Gil doesn't-"
"Me too."
Oz eyes widened, the fear in them slowly replaced by wonder.
But Gil didn't dare to repeat it, didn't dare to open his mouth anymore, too afraid that his voice would reveal the conflicting emotions he felt inside. He instead tried to smile, if only a little.
His master's expression became one of pure happiness, his face breaking into a radiant grin. He had never seen him smile so brightly before, never seen him so genuinely happy. And it hurt Gil to know it was because of a lie.
But as Oz's lips met his again, he decided his choice was made.
He'd rather make his master happy because of a lie, than hurting him by saying the truth.
The young boy was broken enough as it was, and Gil would not shatter him even more.
XxXxX
Gil loved him.
He had said so and had answered his kiss.
And even thought it had been slightly hesitant, Oz had found his smile to be as beautiful as ever.
The young noble had never felt so happy in his life.
XxXxX
They had been doing this for quite some time now, but Gil didn't manage to get used to it.
They had spoken of their 'relationship' to no one, because Oz thought a secret relationship was fun, and it was no use making Alice more possessive than she already was.
And Gil was too scared that they would notice his lie. He had never been a good liar after all, and he was amazed Oz hadn't noticed a thing yet. Maybe the boy was too happy to. His heart sank at the thought.
Every time Oz would kiss him, the raven's hand would tremble as they hesitantly made his way to the boy's back. His heart beat way too fast, full of fear and hope his master wouldn't discover the truth.
Gil had never let it go further than kissing. Oz was only fifteen and too pure to be tainted by a person like him. And he was afraid that he wouldn't be able to pretend to truly want Oz like that. He wouldn't be able to give him the love he deserved.
He was nothing more than a coward.
He was scared to tell the truth. He was scared to see his master hurt. Scared that he would be hurt because of him. Scared that he would be blamed and hated. Not needed anymore.
He was a selfish coward.
Gil felt like the worst person on earth.
XxXxX
He had noticed that Gil had seemed distant lately, but he couldn't understand why. Wasn't he happy to be with him?
Oz's heart was suddenly filled with irrational fear and he felt nauseous.
Could Gil be…having second thoughts about their relationship? His heart clenched painfully in his chest.
No that couldn't be…It just couldn't be.
Oz knew it wasn't like him to be so insecure, but nothing and no one had ever mattered to him like Gil.
To think Gil could be doubtful about their love… To think Gil may not love him like he did… He dreaded the mere idea of it.
No…He trusted Gil. If his servant had said he loved him, then it meant he truly did. Gil would never lie about something as serious as this.
Oz would have to find out what was wrong with him, then.
XxXxX
He was so confused.
He had felt fear building up in his stomach the moment Oz had come to him and said they had to talk.
Had the boy found out the truth? Dear God, anything but that. Please, anything but that! Please…
Gilbert had almost sighed in relief when his master had simply asked him if anything was wrong with him. He had managed to stop it just before he let it out.
However, that relief had been short-lived when Oz started to ask questions after questions. Was Gil worried about something? Did he have something on his mind? Was he mad at him?
"Everything's alright, Oz, don't worry." He had answered, hoping he was convincing enough.
Apparently not.
"Don't lie to me!" the young noble had shouted, taking Gil by surprise. He had seldom heard seen his master this mad, even less towards him.
"I'm not a child Gilbert, neither am I stupid. I can see you've been distant lately, and I want to know why. And that's not a request."
Suddenly Oz had become the master again, not asking, not requiring, but giving orders, and Gil could never disobey, he could only comply.
"I… I've just been a bit overwhelmed, that's all." Please believe me. He had sat on the nearest armchair, feeling his legs beginning to shake. "You don't have to worry about me, I'm fine. Really." Don't be so concerned over me. I don't deserve it.
He had felt Oz sitting next to him and putting his hand on his forearm, his touch gentle but somehow firm, but he hadn't had the courage to look at him in the eyes.
"Is it…Because of me?"
Gilbert had looked up, feeling immediately concerned at the unfamiliar tone in that voice he was much more used to hear cheerful and mischievous than afraid and trembling.
His heart had dropped at the sight before him.
Hurt. It was all he could read in those beautiful green orbs. Hurt and uncertainty. Hurt and Fear. Oz was hurting. That was exactly what he had wanted to avoid.
And it was all because of him.
He wanted to take it all away, to make sure that all that could be seen in those eyes, for as long as it was possible, would be happiness.
He would do anything to see him smile sincerely. Anything to make Oz happy. Anything.
And so, before he could think of anything else, he had pressed his lips against Oz's.
And that's where he was right now.
Gil was so confused.
He had rarely, if ever, initiated any kiss between Oz and him, and he didn't understand what had possessed him to do so now.
He couldn't understand why, as the boy started to answer his kiss, his heart had started beating faster. Too fast.
He couldn't understand why, as Oz folded his arms behind his neck, what he was feeling wasn't fear. It was something completely different he couldn't identify.
He couldn't understand why, as the kiss got more passionate, he felt the need to make it go on forever, and not stop it as soon as possible as he did usually.
They slowly broke apart, breaths uneven and faces flushed, and Gil realized the firm grip his hands had on his master's waist.
Oz chuckled and Gil looked at him with a questioning gaze.
"Gil has a strange way of telling me not to worry. Who would have thought? ~"
The servant's cheeks flushed bright red and the hurt in Oz's eyes was replaced by mischief and, most of all, happiness.
Gil unconsciously smiled as their lips grew closer once again.
Does it really matter why?
XxXxX
Gilbert looked up from his book has he felt Oz move in his sleep, his head on his shoulder.
It was one of these rare times of peace. The day had been uneventful and they had all enjoyed the calm atmosphere. Alice had fallen asleep after devouring an unimaginable amount of meat; Sharon had retired to her room and Break…Well, Break was god-knows-where, and he'd rather not know where exactly.
Gil had been reading in his room when Oz had burst into the room and flopped down on the armchair next to him, complaining that he was soo bored and could please Gil entertain him? (Gil had flushed red; did he have to make it sound so…suggestive?). The boy had fallen asleep on his lover's shoulder shortly after.
Gilbert closed the book and lifted his hand to brush a strand of hair out of Oz's face. He looked so peaceful and the older couldn't resist and dropped a kiss on his forehead.
He heard a small giggle and lifted his head to see Oz staring at him, a small grin on his lips. He blushed as the boy pulled himself up and softly kissed him. Gilbert smiled as well, feeling his heart beat just a bit faster in his chest.
He could live like this.