Title: Romance Isn't Dead
Author: BarbaraChilde
Pairing/Character(s): Dan/Blair
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Spoilers up to end of season 4. Speculation based mainly on the promos and a lot of wishful thinking.
Author's notes: The amazing power that is Dan and Blair has inspired me to write my first fan fic. Unbeta-ed so I hope it's ok and any feedback, positive (I hope) or otherwise (if necessary!), is appreciated.
Disclaimer: I own nothing except the couch I'm sitting on.
One
Dan nervously tapped his fingers as the plane touched down at Charles De Gaulle Airport. He had not, until this point, given much thought to what he would do when he actually reached Paris. Lily had given him Harold and Roman's contact details, but he doubted Blair would be at their country house. She had to be in the city.
Before the summer had begun, Blair had blazed through New York, jilting Louis a week after their engagement and then throwing Chuck's ring back in his face. Dan had hardly seen her in that time. But there had been two moments that had sustained his faith that there could be something more between them.
Dan mused over this as he waited at immigration. Serena, surprisingly, had been his first ray of hope. She had told him that she thought both he and Blair had changed completely through their association with each other and she wasn't sure she knew either of them anymore. Serena then said that she had seen a side of Blair that she didn't even know existed and, if she weren't so astonished at his deception, she would have even have gone so far to say that Dan was good for Blair. A back handed compliment, but Dan saw through her bitterness to the truth. Serena realised that he and Blair had something together, that she never had with either of them and she didn't understand it.
Dan had nothing with him but his on-board luggage, so he passed the crowds waiting at the carousel and walked outside to the fresh air. He waved down a cab at the rank and directed the driver to the address given to him by his father, a studio apartment belonging to a friend of his who was away tour. He had confessed to his father and Lily the reason for his erratic behaviour and they had, amazingly understandingly, helped him get to Paris.
Dan leant back in seat of the cab. The last time he had seen Blair was just after she had ended everything with Louis. She had turned up at his door, late one night, with a bottle of red wine and a copy of The Shining in her hand.
"I need to be silent and drink and watch thrillers with a friend, and you were the best candidate, Humphrey."
"If I'm not mistaken, I think you might be telling me you need me again, Waldorf." He could see she was a bit shattered and had wanted to stir her up to lift her spirits.
"Don't be stupid, it's just you're the easiest person I know to intimidate and I don't feel like answering stupid questions."
Dan smiled at her. "Well, considering that you're inferring that I don't ask stupid questions, I think that may be the nicest thing you have ever said to me."
She sat on the couch. "Please be quiet and get me a wine glass. You can see I'm not saying sensible things. I need to be distracted."
"Jack Nicholson going nuts over a typewriter is what you want to distract yourself with?" Dan had laughed as he turned the DVD over in his hands. "It's probably a good analogy for my life at the moment though, 'all work and no play makes Dan a dull boy'."
"That's your specialty, Humphrey. Now, I mean it, be quiet."
Blair had passed Dan a glass of wine and lost herself in the film, while he looked at her and wished he knew what motives she had behind coming to visit him. Did she really just want company?
They had drunk the wine. Well, Blair had drunk most of the wine and had then opened another bottle she had found in the kitchen. At the end of the film she had drowsily turned to him and said, "No matter what, Humphrey, I hope we stay friends. Everyone is just going to have to accept that we are friends, including Chuck."
Dan, despairing at the idea that all she would ever want is friendship, had said nothing. But then she had rested her head on his shoulder and said, "Because you were right you know, Dan, I do need you."
His heart had jumped into his throat and he put his cheek on top of her head. "I might need you too, Blair."
They had sat there like that, making Dan wonder if it was the right time to say something more, but the moment changed when Blair unsteadily stood up and laughed. "Excellent, well that's set and everyone else can get screwed. I have to go."
She had called her driver and Dan managed to get her coat on her drunken person. Blair made it more difficult by relaxing back into him as he draped it over her shoulders. He had had to restrain himself from wrapping his arms around her. "OK, Rummy, I'm going to walk you downstairs. I don't trust you on the steps."
She had left him in a haze of wine fumes, Chanel and confusion.
That had happened just before Serena had told him Chuck had swept her off her feet with an engagement ring and then Dan had upset the entire van der Woodsen clan by having a stupid, thoughtless, drunken moment with Charlie that Serena had managed to walk in on.
Six weeks had passed since Dan had seen Blair. Manhattan had been bare of any company since the summer began, but Dan hadn't wanted to leave in case she came back. He had felt paralysed, unable to even properly express himself in his journal. He buried himself in some uncreative editing work that had come up at Vanity Fair, after they had published his article. He tried not to think about what Blair was doing and whom she could be with, but he wasn't succeeding.
He realised she was doing some kind of work in fashion when he saw a photograph of her at an event Vanity Fair had covered. She was associated with French Vogue in the photo and a little more research online found a blog linked to the Vogue website, Mode aperçu de Paris. The blog was an amusing account of the Fall/Winter Mode à Paris collections and had gathered quite a collection of followers. Luckily, it was posted in both English and French and Dan could tell Blair's writing style anywhere. In fact, he'd copied it before to help her out at W. A few more photos from other events convinced him; she had to be in Paris.
He hesitated for 3 days but, after another sleepless night re-reading Blair's blog posts, he pooled his resources together and got himself on a plane to Paris.
Dan's reverie was interrupted when the cab driver jolted to a stop. He paid his fare and stepped out to the busy street. The key was at a café below the apartment. It was a fairly painless exercise for Dan to retrieve it and let himself into the airy, modern apartment. He immediately sat down at the table and pulled out his laptop, his map of Paris and French phrase book and started planning his mission through Paris to find Blair.
Two
It was proving to be just as difficult to find Blair as Dan had supposed. He had not seen her at Vogue and when he had actually showed the stern fashionista at the front desk Blair's photo, she had looked at him like he was a crazy stalker. Which maybe he was? He backed out of there, quickly, before she could call security.
Tracking Blair through her blog had only told him where she had been, not where she was going. He had been visiting hotels, starting at the most expensive, but each concierge would tell him nothing. He thought he would be better trying to call the hotels instead, leaving messages for Blair, "if she wanted to see Dan Humphrey, he was in Paris and waiting for her call". It was stupid, useless and demeaning. She probably wasn't even staying at a hotel but with friends, or an apartment of her father's.
Back at the apartment, Dan checked his laptop to see if Blair had updated her blog. There it was. She was going to the Vogue closing party for the end of the Mode à Paris week that evening. It was at the Hotel de Crillon and she was going to wear Dior.
He was an idiot. He hadn't even had the foresight to bring more than a change of clothes with him. He should have at least bought a suit so he could try and blag his way into the party Blair was attending. He wouldn't even get into the kitchen in his jeans and plaid. He could hardly stand around the front door waiting around, trying to catch her on her way in.
Dan wondered what he could do. He had his Vanity Fair press card, he just needed to look the part and maybe he could sweet talk his way into the party. He walked to the closet next to the bed to see if his Dad's friend had anything useful. It held an assortment of clothing, mostly casual, but crumpled at the bottom was a black tuxedo, clearly kicked off in haste. Dan picked it up and shook it out. It smelt like cigarettes and had some stains but it was a size 38T Armani suit and would serve very well if he could just find a way to get it clean. He shrugged off his jeans to check the fit of the trousers. They were ok in the waist, a little loose but nothing a belt wouldn't fix. The pant hem however was at least 3cm too short. That would never do. Worse, all the shoes were size 9 and Dan couldn't get his size 11's into them. He couldn't wear sneakers, which were the only shoes he had bought with him.
Dan checked the time. It was 3.30, he had to find a dry cleaner that could clean the suit and let down the pants and he also had to go buy a pair of suitable shoes. The closing show was by invitation only but he knew it was at the Hotel de Crillon. He didn't know what time it started, but that was on his side at least, as the later he got there, the more likely he could talk his way in. But it would also be harder to find Blair.
Dan decided it was time to plead a favour from a friend at the Vanity Fair office. He pulled out his cell phone, searched for a number and called. "Ed, it's Dan, I need you to do me a favour and find out who the Vanity Fair Paris correspondent is. And find out if we are covering anything in Paris at the moment…I'll tell you why later... You are a legend, I owe you big time...can you email me the details?"
Dan hung up, gathered up the soiled tuxedo and bolted out the door.
Dan looked as sharp as he could possibly look, or so he hoped. The tuxedo was now pristine and the cuffs of the trousers hung perfectly above his brand new, highly uncomfortable, shiny, black shoes. He checked his watch. It had just passed 9.30pm. Definitely later than he wanted it to be.
He hadn't been able to find dry cleaners that would fix the suit in time. When he had found himself at the nearby Hotel Le Bristol, bribing the bellboy there 100 euro to get the suit fixed for him, Dan knew he had learnt more from his UES friends than he had realised.
"I will have it delivered to your room, monsieur?"
"No! No, I, uh, I feel like a drink at the bar….you can bring it to me there."
The bellboy looked at him strangely but nodded and left with the suit.
Dan had spent a nervous two hours at the bar, trying to play the nonchalant playboy, and failing miserably, waiting for the bellboy to return. He almost lost his nerve and left, but he knew if he did, he would never see the suit or the euros again. If the bellboy didn't return, then he might as well sit there in the bar and get drunk anyway. He had tried to stick to only one drink, but anxiety had got the best of him. When the bellboy finally returned, Dan gave him another 50 euro in relief, leaving his pockets almost empty when he settled his tab at the bar.
The Hotel de Crillon was not too far from the apartment, so Dan decided to clear his head by walking. He tried to think of what he would say to get into the party. His friend Ed had found out that the correspondent, Sara Vandalay, was currently working on an article about the photographer Testino, and as the event was being held in his honour, she would definitely be attending.
As he reached the Place de la Concorde, he saw the lights over the Seine and he wondered whether the whole escapade was going to be useless and he would never find Blair. It seemed outrageous the lengths he was going to. But he was driven and he doubted he would be able to turn around now, even if he wanted to.
The lights of the hotel loomed up at him and Dan walked past the security guards to the reception desk.
"Uh, hi there, I'm Daniel Humphrey, I'm filling for Sara Vandalay for Vanity Fair this evening." Dan pulled out his Press card and flashed, what he hoped was, his most charming smile.
The blonde at the counter looked down at the passes in front of her. "Pardon monsieur, Ms Vandalay is already here. She picked up her pass 45 minutes ago. There has been a mistake."
"Oh, uh, well, she probably hasn't got the message. Um, you see, she's been urgently called to an assignment on uh, Michel Houellebecq. Um, she's been granted an interview and has to leave for Spain immediately, before he changes his mind." The blonde looked confused. He continued, "I've been called in to interview Testino in her place."
The girl looked Dan up and down, taking in his attire and the dark eyes directed intently upon her. "Un moment, monsieur, I will send some one to find her."
"I don't want to cause any disturbance. Could I just slip in and find her myself? It really is very urgent." Dan placed his hand on the counter and smiled.
She smiled at him but remained firm. "No one is here to escort you currently, monsieur. Please wait a moment."
Dan nearly plunged his hands into his pockets, but pulled back in time before he ruined the line of his suit. He walked to the wall and leant against it, thinking that the game was going to be up, imminently.
An idea crept into his mind. Dan grabbed his pocket, as if his phone had vibrated, and then pulled it out. "This is Daniel Humphrey…Yes, I'm there now…I have to wait for them to find her...no one phoned through the change of attendees… They're holding the chopper for her? Ok, I'll do what I can."
Dan hung up his phone and looked over at the blonde. She held out a pass to him.
"Monsieur, perhaps you should go ahead. I will inform security."
Dan grabbed the pass and smiled his thanks to the girl and walked through the foyer of the hotel toward the ballroom.
It was incredibly crowded with people. The array of colours and textures around him was a little overwhelming. It was like a kaleidoscope, from the outrageous to the sublime. He wondered how the hell he was going to find Blair. He grabbed a glass of champagne off a passing tray and walked purposely on through the throng.
Dan kept a close eye out for security as he scrutinised all the brunettes around him. Blair was such a chameleon in her fashion sense she could be wearing anything. He thought he saw her once but, after an awkward interaction, he realised his mistake. He was going to have to take care in whom he accosted. After he had taken a walk around the perimeter of the room once, he stationed himself under a large palm, where he had a pretty good view over the crowd.
He saw Blair across the room at once. She was taking some notes, intently, with a small pen in a notebook. Her hair fell over her eyes and she looked beautiful in her sage green draped dress. Her eyes scanned around the room to see if anyone was observing her writing, but stopped in shock when she realised Dan Humphrey was looking straight at her. She dropped her notebook and by the time she bent down to pick it up, he had squeezed his way across the room to her side.
"Blair."
"Humphrey, what are you doing here?"
"I wanted to see you and I was worried because no one knew where you were. Well no one I was talking to anyway." Dan realised that he had not planned at all what he wanted to say to Blair and had no idea what could come tumbling out of his mouth.
"You came all the way to Paris?"
"Well, clearly, I'm here aren't I?"
"How did you get in here?"
"Charm and a Vanity Fair press card?"
Blair just blinked at him.
"This is the only place I knew you would be for sure, so I had to get in somehow. I think I've been a bit crazy but I was determined to see you."
"I'm not sure I understand, Humphrey, but can we go somewhere? We can't talk here."
"You would not believe what I have gone through just to get in here, but trust me, there is nothing I would like better."
Blair turned and they headed together to the foyer of the Hotel de Crillon. It was too warm an evening for Blair to need a jacket, so they strolled directly outside and headed toward the Jardins des Tuileries.
They were both silent. Dan wondered how to best broach the topic he so wanted to discuss, but for once words failed him.
"So Vogue…" "When did…?" They both said simultaneously. They fell silent again until they reached the gardens. Blair sat on a bench overlooking the fountain and Dan perched next to her, as close as he dared.
Dan took a deep breath and plunged in. "Blair, I wasn't honest with you when I said that kiss meant nothing."
"You never said this to me before, why now?"
"I was terrified at first by how I felt and didn't want to admit it. And it would have been the worst time for me to declare my feelings when you were engaged to Louis and then nearly to Chuck. When I found out you had chosen neither of them, you'd left the city and no one could, or would, tell me where you'd gone."
Blair sat mutely, seeming to think this over.
He continued. "But I have missed you so much over the last few months, I had to come when I knew where you were."
Blair frowned at Dan "So what happened with Charlie then, if you were so hung up on me? Did you just forget me temporarily? Men are known to do that to me."
"No! I was confused. I thought you were back with Chuck and you'd just told me again that we were just friends." Dan rested his head in his hands. "And I knew, whatever you had said that night, we could never have a friendship like we had, if you were with Chuck. He would never allow it, even if it were possible."
"Nothing happened with Charlie anyway, really," Dan continued. "When Serena walked in, it had already come to nothing. It just made me think about you."
He trailed off and Blair looked at him uncertainly. "Blair, I don't want just friendship with you. If it's all you can give me then I'm going to need some time before I can be around you."
"Is that what you came to Paris to tell me? That you don't want to be my friend anymore and you don't want to see me?" Dan looked up at Blair's face and saw a smirk had appeared on her lips.
He sat up, hope springing. "I want to see you, I want to be seen with you. I just can't be around you without wanting to be with you."
Blair stood up. "So, what you're saying is, in order to hang around together, like we used too, I have to let you go out in public with me and kiss me every now and again?"
Dan let out a breath. "Yes, that's right. Basically"
Blair pouted, "Well, you haven't even tried to touch me yet. It doesn't seem like you can't be around me without wanting to kiss me."
"I'd better remedy that." Dan leaped to his feet and wrapped his arms around Blair's waist. He bent his head to hers, "I'm not waiting for you this time."
Their third kiss was everything Dan could have hoped it would be. Blair's hands crept up around his neck and, as he deepened the kiss, he could feel her relaxing into him.
Blair buried her head in Dan's shoulder. "Thank you for coming to me, Humphrey, you've saved my pride in having to come to you."
"Would you have done that?"
"I was coming to the conclusion that I would have to. I just didn't know if you would believe me, when I told you how I felt, after I had made such a spectacle of myself over Louis and Chuck." Blair flushed by her honesty, raised her lips for another kiss and Dan felt a glow of happiness.
He tightened his arms around her. "You have no idea how hard I worked to find you. Not least, desperately trying to make myself understood to the incredibly unhelpful people who live in this city."
"I have never found the French unhelpful."
"Yes, but you are a beautiful, chic, multilingual woman, and I am just a poor philistine in flannel with a phrasebook."
Blair laughed deliciously, "You really chased me around Paris with a French phrase book?"
"Uh huh."
"Sacre bleu, I hope no one associates me with someone so uncivilised!"
"I had a photo of you and everything."
"So you've ruined me here too."
"I sure hope so, then you'll have to come back to Brooklyn with me."
Blair laughed again. "It's ok, the Parisians are far more understanding about the charms of poor, romantic, young writers than New Yorkers, as long as the writer is talented or handsome."
"Lucky for you, I am both."
"And modest." Blair reached up to kiss him. "Where are you staying? Is it close? I'm staying with family friends and there are people there and I want to be alone with you."
"It is close and it's even tolerable enough for you to grace it with your company. Despite the mess I made in my frantic rush to get presentable for you."
"And very presentable I find you, Humphrey. Let's go."
Three
"Humphrey, tell me a story." Blair lay in Dan's arms and the afternoon light streamed through the open drapes.
"A story." Dan turned his head and looked at the girl with the heavy eyes and darkly kissed lips beside him. "I can only think of one story right now. It's the one I want you to tell me of why you left New York the way you did, with no one knowing where you were."
Blair turned to him. "Eva returned to New York to see Chuck and it all came clear to me. I realised how truly the right person in your life can be your better self. And Chuck and I would never be that for each other. I felt stupid that I had been so blind for so long. I hadn't equated being stronger away from Chuck with also being better and happier away from Chuck."
"I didn't hear that Eva had returned. No one was talking to me."
"I'm not surprised after your escapades with Serena's not so sweet cousin."
"Please don't bring that up again!" Dan groaned. "Even Eric shut down on me and he was the only person I could talk to about you."
"I wanted to see you after I had ended it all with Chuck," Blair continued. "But then Serena was so furious at you over Charlie, and had only just forgiven me. I thought if you had another girl in your life, she would certainly make sure there was no room for me in it."
"So you bolted to France?'
"Waldorf's don't bolt. I took advantage of opportunities that arose away from New York for the summer. I also realised I like the person I am away from Chuck."
"I like the person you are away from Chuck too." Dan kissed her smiling lips. "And Louis?"
"Louis was just an anomaly. How could any girl in her sane mind pass up the opportunity to be a princess? I am still marvelling at my insanity over breaking the engagement. But I was so unhappy and didn't know why."
"I was unhappy, and I knew why," Dan said, candidly. "When I kissed you the second time, that's when I knew I really wanted to keep kissing you. The first kiss was weird. Weird good, yes, but I wasn't convinced it wasn't just the novelty of it that had me intrigued. The second time, the only thing that was weird was that the situation was so contrived but kissing you felt so natural."
"It wasn't kissing you that made me realise I wanted to kiss you. It was not kissing you." Blair lay back on the pillow and closed her eyes, as if remembering.
Dan smiled at her evasiveness. "Elaborate please, Blair."
Blair opened one eye. "I convinced myself I was kissing you because it clarified how I felt about Chuck and then Louis." She sighed. "I was kissing Louis and then kissing Chuck, while I was denying to myself that I really wanted to kiss you. Nothing felt right, so I burned all my bridges and came here and buried myself in my internship at French Vogue. Which, I must say, was a godsend for me… or rather a Roman-send." She rolled her eyes. "Who knew what connections he had with Carine Roitfield?"
"It sounds like you've had some triumphs. From reading your blog posts, anyway."
"Humphrey, reading my blog! I don't believe it. Did you learn anything?"
"I learnt where you were. How'd you think I would have found you without trailing around behind you to various Parisian fashion houses? You'd dropped off the map. Even Gossip Girl was silent. Besides," Dan kissed Blair's neck and then her upturned lips; "you have a turn of phrase that's quite charming when you're writing about Balenciaga."
"I guess it was too much to hope that you might take some of my sartorial advice. How did you realise I was interning at Vogue?"
"I had been reduced to randomly googling your name to try and find you after you left. When you popped up on a French blog, I knew you had to be in Paris. The ex-fiancée of Prince Louis making a splash at French Vogue."
"Hmmm, everyone wanted to get a look at the girl who had jilted Louis. I managed to turn it to my advantage however."
"I don't doubt it." Dan looked frankly at the girl nestled in his arms. "I spent all my Vanity Fair pay, and came clean to Dad and Lily about my feelings for you, to get over here and find you."
Blair laughed. "I should reward you for your dedication."
"I think I just had my reward" Dan rolled Blair onto her back and kissed her.
"No, that was my reward." Blair raised one eyebrow." I mean I know where all the new men's samples are for Vogue. And, since you look like you've been pining for me since I left, I think some might fit you. Come on, get up." Blair made as if to push Dan off her.
"No." Dan dropped like a dead weight on top of her. " I can't. I'm very busy."
"Humphrey! It's nearly evening. If we're going to go it has to be now. You'll really like them, I promise, and, if you don't, then it's your punishment for flashing my photograph over Paris."
"There's something else I really like right now." He pushed his lips further into her neck and nuzzled under her ear. "This bit of skin here, it really needs my attention."
"But you have to be fitted out to be my suitable escort and I swear you didn't even bring a change of clothes with you!"
"I promise, the very first place I escort you, when we leave this room, will be to whatever fashion hell you choose. But until we leave this room, we don't have to be dressed at all."
Blair giggled and then sighed as Dan began to kiss his way down her body. "You really are quite persuasive."
"You better believe it, baby."