(Note: I don't remember ALL the conversation choices I made exactly, so, forgive me - call it artistic liberty! xx)

- Sail the Universe -
Prologue

She turned the book over between her hands, staring out across the sharp spires of the city with a distant look in her dark eyes. Briefly, and only briefly, did she allow herself to glance upwards at the dark net of stars, blinking quietly away to themselves in usual fashion. Somewhere out there, would be parties and celebrations for things no one had any knowledge about. Even here, they went about life without thinking or looking, their eyes glazed with the neon lights and lips parting as if to laugh or even shout.

Her eyes skipped down to the cover of the heavy tome she held. Collected Poems of Lord Alfred Tennyson. She wasn't ever much of one for poetry, but she could never resist a well turned phrase. It was a habit that had stayed with her when she became a Commander, as she worked her way slowly through the ranks of N7 and towards her goal of having her own ship someday. It was only natural to idealise it, both of her parents had been Navy and she had grown up among brats in the same circumstances as she. There were no gardens of flowers, or smoggy alleyways when she had been a child; there had been duty, obligation and a strict upright code. She had grown up wanting to be in the Alliance Navy, wanting what her parents and friends had. It was only natural.

"Sometimes, I think they happily just want to ignore whatever is being said to them."

She glanced sidelong at the Turian standing next to her, most of his usually inexpressive face covered in a large white print of tribal marking. Whilst she didn't mind alien races, she had grown up with parents and family who had fought in the first contact war. It was a little hard to shake off that feeling around Nihilus, given how strict he was.

"Who is that?"

"The Council, but it's nothing that should concern you. We got some orders through and it happens to be on another of your usual routes." Nihilus handed the datapad to her. "Eden Prime."

Shepard said nothing. The Turian was a Spectre and had spent most of his time on their ship lately. She was under the command of Anderson, a well respected officer and someone she admired greatly. Anderson had been close friends with her father. After a Terminus turf war had seen Alliance science ships getting stranded in combat, the last she had of him was a badly grained datafeed.

She often wondered if that was why Anderson had requested her on his ship; to look out for her or maybe to remember the father that she barely could, a father she was always told she took after in personality. "We're gonna need more of your food then," she muttered.

"I'm in your debt."

Whilst his face betrayed little, the tone was there, a hint of amusement. She almost smiled in spite of herself. So that's how it was, more wry and dry, than outright sarcasm. The more time she spent around Turians, the more she could see how alike their races could be. "Alright," she tapped fingers on the pad to order the food stores in, "But you're gonna have to do without your little luxuries."

"I think my figure would thank you."

"I think your heart might more, I saw how some of those were prepared. Ugh."

"It aids digestion."

Shepard merely quirked one of her platinum eyebrows, "Sure. That I can believe, I sure don't think much can fix the taste."

This time is was Nihilus who moved his facial plates a little, reminiscent of a smile and a friendly one at that. It was that moment that she decided to go ahead and like the odd Spectre. They stood there together for some time, bantering back and forth about food supplies, about places they'd been and about the news feed that had some usual galactic trouble brewing out in the Terminus systems. She commented with some disdain about Batarians, it was something that even now she had difficulty stopping herself from doing; her parents had taught her to be open minded. But the mention of their name brought back memories she'd rather have stuffed down, of a grainy picture and her fathers distorted voice. It made her think of Elysium...

After a while Nihilus left to go and check on his gear and make sure his papers were in order. He might be a Spectre but he seemed one of those that enjoyed rules and paperwork. Just like a Turian to keep everything in shape.

Her eyes kept moving to the sky, to the stars.

They seemed very far away but if she squinted and held up her hand, surely she could catch them between her fingers. Her arm lifted without volition and only as she was beginning to squeeze her eyes shut did she realise what she was doing and snapped it back down to her side furiously, cheeks turning a blush rose. "I'm not a kid any more," she huffed to the air about her, as if it would care.

The office was empty of people and without them, it seemed somehow too clinical, too alien. It wasn't like the places she was used to. She'd once visited Earth with her mother, Hannah. There'd been old mansions with warm sitting rooms, offices and dining halls so large she could imagine through the eyes of a child how wonderful it must have been to live there, how many wonderful things must have happened. If she went back now, she wouldn't see any of those things. She would miss the starry map of the universe, she'd miss the sights and smells of space ports, the sound of the mass effect engine throbbing as the ship wound a way through nebulae and gravity fields. She wasn't meant to live on the solid ground.

No, I'm no longer a child with a million questions and no answers. I'm an adult, looking for a way in this life. The questions haven't grown any less but the answers are finally coming to me. Anderson and the Normandy are the life I know right now, it's something I'm very proud of. So stop worrying... just stop.

The call was coming in before she was even aware of hearing it, so she lifted her left arm and tapped through her code, "Hello? Yes, yes I made the arrangements for it. Pick up the extra supplies from cargo bay 23. Yes, we can always bunk him in down by the battery, there's some spare rooms there. No, I'll come right away. Tell Captain Anderson I won't be long. Alright, thank you."

The omnitool glow faded and she looked back, only once at the sky and made a grab at the stars, feeling at once foolish and giddy. Then she laughed, "Not a child, Commander Shepard."