Tada~ Fiastata, here is your gift fic~! I hope you like it

Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia, the BTT, the Sideburns Song, Toby the Turtle, the golden dating age rule or Mean Girls. I do own pens and a notebook. Who needs anything else? :)

"Frany, your blanket's epic."

Antonia threw herself onto Françoise's bed beside Julchen.

"Ahh~ I agree. It's SO comfy~!"

Françoise closed the bedroom door behind her.

"Oui, je sais, je sais girls. You always say that. Anyway." Françoise dropped two shopping bags on the bed. "I come bearing food."

The other two launched themselves onto the bags and all three started pulling out their favourites.

"And so the weekly meeting of the awesome Bad Touch Trio begins." Julchen said through a mouthful of chocolate.

"Hey Fran, is that teacher still picking on you? The maths one with the massive sideburns?"

Françoise swallowed a mouthful of toffee and shook her head. "No, I understand what we're doing now and besides, he's got his knife stuck into that Amelia girl for telling people about how he nearly dropped the projection screen on himself."

Antonia and Julchen laughed.

"Really? He did that?"

Françoise took a sip from a can of coke.

"Right in the middle of simulation equations. And about a minute later, someone's phone went off blaring the sideburn song."

Antonia nearly inhaled her drink. Julchen slapped her on the back, also spluttering.

"And also, he's got dark hair yet his sideburns are ginger. How does that even work?"

"Gingerness skips a generation. Julchen stated, having recovered slightly. "And men in the skipped generation will grow ginger facial hair. My mutti's ginger and West tried to grow a beard last year but it grew out ginger."

Antonia thought for a moment, resurfacing from her coughing fit.

"So you're the future mother of ginger children?"

"Or albinos."

Françoise fished her phone out of her pocket.

"That's it. From now on your name on my phone is Future Mother of Ginger Children."

Julchen lunged for the phone.

"NEIN! GIVE! GIVE NAOW!"

The two girls tumbled off the bed fighting over the phone, Antonia cheering them both on from her perch on the bed.

There came a knock on the door. "Girls, no brawling in the house."

"Sorry Maman." "Sorry Mrs Bonnefoy."

Françoise pulled herself back onto the bed. She glanced back at Julchen, who was still on the floor.

"You getting up Jul?"

"Nope. Gonna make awesome dust angels down here."

Françoise threw a steady stream of loose change from her beside table at a patch of Julchen's exposed stomach.

"Up. Get up."

Julchen curled up on her back, groaning and clutching her stomach.

"Frany! That last one really hurt! You're really not awesome."

Antonia leaned across the bed to look at her. "You look like a turtle from here."

Julchen giggled. "I like turtles."

Françoise turned to face Antonia. "Speaking of liking things, Antonia."

Julchen sat up a jolt and scrambled back over to the bed.

"Are you kidding me?! Are you actually fucking kidding me?! You've got another one already?! Holy shit Tonia!"

Françoise patted Julchen's head. "she doesn't have another guy already, but you've been getting awfully cosy, Antonia, with that third year, hmmm... what was his name again?"

"Lovino." Antonio answered immediately.

"Hang on a sec, did I hear right?" Julchen gracelessly hurled herself back on the bed. "You've been 'getting cosy' with that grouchy as hell third year who, may I just add, is fourteen and you're nearly seventeen?"

"So~? He's so cute~!" Antonia clutched the turtle plushie she'd brought with her and wiggled. Françoise and Julchen gave each other a look.

"First off, Tonia, his face makes him look like he sucks lemons and pisses vinegar. I know you might see him differently but he's still a grouchy bastard."

"Oui, c'est vrai. And remember my golden rule, half your age plus seven. You're seventeen, divide that by two and you get..."

"Eight and a half." Julchen chimed in. "Then add seven and you get fifteen and a half meaning he's too young for you by a year and a half. Q.E.D."

"Now neither of us is stopping you from being with him." Françoise added smoothly. "Just be careful, cherie. We don't want you to get hurt. Grande soeur must look after her little girls, non?"

Julchen deadpanned. "You're including me in the whole 'little girls' thing, aren't you? Not awesome Frany, we're both older than you."

Françoise threw back her head and laughed. "Ah cherie, cherie, cherie. You'll understand when you're older."

"I am older!"

Antonia snuggled her turtle and watched the two bicker again.

"Aren't they silly, Toby?"

Françoise leaned over and moved Toby's head as if the turtle was replying. "Oh yes Antonia~! They're such silly-billies, but they love each other. And you~! And me~!"

Julchen chuckled then sighed, idly petting Toby's head. "I think I'd have gone mad without the two of you."

Françoise gestured to Toby. "We just spoke through a stuffed turtle. We're already mad."

"No, I mean..." Julchen flopped down onto her back, staring at the glow-in-the-dark stick on stars on the ceiling. "Before I moved here..."

Antonio rolled onto her front, still cuddling Toby. "Oh yeah, you've only lived here for five years. It feels like we've been friends forever."

Françoise lay down beside Julchen. "Yeah. It feels like the Bad Touch Trio was around 'long before nation's lines were drawn.'"

"Causally quoting musicals like a boss." Julchen grinned. "Anyway, before I moved here, shit was hitting the fan for me from all directions. No one really wanted to know the 'albino freak' so I was dossing from school four days out of five. I couldn't do schoolwork for shit, West was refusing to admit being related to me, my parents were constantly on my case and comparing me to West and my prissy Austrian cousin. And then my best friend Lizzy started avoiding me. Apparently she got in with this group of bitches who thought I was 'destroying her image'. She'd been the only thing that was keeping me borderline sane. I think that I was practically depressed at that point. Then Vati got a job transfer, we ended up here and I found the two craziest, most awesome people in the world. Apart from me of course."

"Oh Jully!" Antonia flung herself at Julchen, half smothering her in the hug. Françoise wrapped her arms around both her friends' shoulders and joined in the hug.

"Girls come down! Dinner's on the table!"

The three girls disengaged from each other and slid off the bed. Françoise ruffled Julchen's already dishevelled hair.

"I'm glad you found us. We couldn't be the awesome BTT without you."

Julchen grinned. "I still haven't forgiven you for calling me the Future Mother of Ginger Children."

Françoise stuck out her tongue at her. "Boo, you whore."

Julchen tugged Françoise's hair lightly. "Nice wig, what's it made out of?"

Antonia swing back into the conversation. "Your mom's chest hair!"

The three of them collapsed into a fit of helpless giggles.

Okay, so I hope you enjoyed!

Ja!

-Animerockchic