Hello y'all. 'waves'
It may've seemed that I'd disappeard for a while, as I haven't updated or published anything in TIME, but I assure you: I still exist. I am just on my summer hols and also playing through final fantasy 8 & 9, which takes up a lot of time.
But here I am, with nothing that I actually promised to write. I know some of you may be hopers for the sequel to 'Far too Long for Friends' but I am having some difficulty with it, and forced writing is unhappy writing that cries at night and makes my pillow soggy.
As for this: I swear to gods it will be Larsa/Penelo when the time come, I still love them and Penelo belongs to Larsa, but I have decided to address the Vaan issue in a more involved way.
This story has a fair amount of inspiration and some vague themes drawn from the film 'Howls Moving Castle' by Studio Ghibi - makers of 'Spirited Away' (If you haven't seen it then you should leave your computer RIGHT NOW and go locate the nearest copy of it).
Although what I mean by 'themes/concepts' is that it's a great movie as opposed to I am writing the movie's plot for this pairing. This plot is all mine. But go see the movie, it's really good.
Anyhoos. On with the fic.
The reason Penelo was able to stroll so freely into the Arcades Palace of Emperor Larsa Solidor one tepid morning, some six years after the coronation of Ashelia B'nargin Dalmasca; was not due to her old friendship with 'The Lord of the House', but because it was a hiring day and the guards took her to be another hopeful jobseeker passing through in search of work. Thankful for the serendipity, Penelo clicked her knuckles in agitation and once past the doors waited until the guards were not watching to slip through a corridor veering away from the marked route towards the servants' quarters - where the staff interviews were being held, as she definitely wasn't here to work. Then in another bout of good fortune the guards and attendants became minimal once she was past the first layer of hallways and into the more residential areas of the palace, which made it unlikely for her to be noticed or 'directed' to her proper place.
The layout of the Palace was fairly simple, so Penelo managed to keep her bearings and reach what appeared to be the personal quarters of the Emperor without getting lost. She was in fact hoping to request a personal favor from Larsa, for old times sake if nothing else, which was to exert some influence over his country's border control and allow her Vaan escape Arcades without any papers. As after a somewhat notorious stint of robberies the pirating duo had unwittingly invited the pursuit of a ruthless sect of bounty hunters, with connections and scouts all across the country. Basically they were in trouble - enough of it to scare Vaan… and that took a lot.
The problem with this plan was that Penelo hadn't actually seen Larsa in about six years, and her last letter from him was probably four at most. It wasn't that they hadn't tried to stay in contact; just that Larsa was busy and became more so, while she gained notoriety and a prize on her head - meaning that eventually even signing her own name on letters was a risk she and Vaan couldn't afford.
It gradually came to be that whenever Penelo did want to send a letter she had to pass it onto a stranger and ask them to mail it from their next destination, lest the hunters discover their location from postal scouts. However this meant that a fair number of correspondences were lost, crumpled and forgotten in the packs of various travelers, which did not strengthen her relationship with Larsa to say the least. Especially when the young Emperor thought he was being discarded for a more adventurous lifestyle, an assumption drawn from the petering flow of letters and the hazy details of her activites and/or whereabouts.
Larsa then also grew to resent the fleeting hints at a more-than-platonic-relationship developing between Penelo and Vaan, and tritely decided that Vaan must be the cause of her distraction and apparent disterest with him. He was still only a child after all, and a jealousy complex was easily understandable considering his melodramatic family life followed by a messy chain of family-deaths, and along with Penelo being what could've been called his first crush at this time - it all worked together to blacken Larsa's remaining sentiments on the mythical state of love without mercy as he aged, replaced by a cruel skepticism that became somewhat infamous in his social circles.
'Love' Larsa Ferrinas Solidor told himself once - around the age of fifteen – and locked up in his study making paper throwing-stars from Penelo's last letter, which featured such nauseating uses of the word 'we' (such as we thought it… and we send our love) that he couldn't even bear to finish it.
'Love…is for fools. Fools and dreamers.' He concluded bitterly before flinging the last bit of bastardized parchment into a bin placed purposely across the room, it hit the target with perfect aim, and then the 'Lord Larsa' proceeded to destroy every address Penelo ever gave him.
Yet only four years on, Penelo innocently wondered whatever happened to her friendship with Larsa as she paced his hallways: when he stopped replying to her letters it was as if he suddenly didn't want to know her anymore. Perhaps she may not have written as much as she meant to, but it was a little irrational of him to expect something from her that often when he knew her 'situation'. So she told herself that if he didn't want to stay in contact then that was fine, she wasn't exactly lonely anyway, not with Vaan around - he was all she needed.
Penelo followed a corner round to spot a lone attendant positioned in front of an oaken door a little way down the corridor, bearing a little embossed plaque, he was obviously guarding the commoners (like herself) from the voices she faintly detected through the paneled walls.
"Can I help you?" The thickly accented voice of said assistant inquired with suspicion, and broke Penelo from her chain of thoughts, which were largely centered on Vaan and how much she needed Larsa to help her - or else he'd stay in hiding until things 'cooled off' with the hunters. But how long that would take wasn't something she could bear thinking about, as the last time they'd been separated was more than seven years ago (when she was used as bait by the bounty hunter Ba'Gamnan) and any time away from Vaan was ill spent and riddled with anxiety. The fact was that Penelo simply didn't know what to do without him anymore.
"I said, can I help you?" The attendant reiterated irately just as Penelo stopped by the door and twisted around to face him with an expression of naivety, as if his existence had just been brought to her attention.
"Oh…no, sorry." She stammered timidly while telling herself again and again that it wasn't normal for her to be this lost without him around. "I was just looking for…"
"A job?" He cut in snidely, a truly contemptuous sneer on his face, "You are in completely the wrong place. The interviews are…" Now when it meant she was let into the palace freely Penelo didn't mind being taken for a servant, but when she was being looked down on by a nobody: it was a problem.
"I am not a servant here!" she spat with a boldness that she startled herself with, as since Vaan took off she'd been drifting around like a ghost, but it would seem that she did have some life left in her after all. However the rattle of a lock on the door interrupted this surprise outburst before it had time to blossom; as the panel opened and a man aged about twenty or so appeared from the room she'd heard the voices from. He was in fact no more than a young boy who'd changed a bit since Penelo had last seen him - some six years ago at Ashe's coronation. But to Penelo the oddest thing about Larsa Solidor, past his sharp eyes and cleanly shaven jaw, was the unimpressed scorn he wore while casting his gaze briefly over the two Humes at his study door.
"I thought I asked for quiet." He announced coolly with an accusing glare at the guard, before bringing his gaze listlessly over Penelo. But as he peered at her it was as if there were a lens of frosted glass over each of Larsas' eyes, and it was as if he were trying to look at her through a thick mist, although something did seem to click for the breifest of moments when she smiled at him. However it soon faded into nothing and all Emperor Solidor 'saw' of the woman stood behind his attendant was an untamed head of mousy brown hair (as in order to lay low Penelo had dyed it,) and a rather distasteful bruise fading over her left eye – 'won' a few nights ago after being surrounded with Vaan outside a bar by some amateur hunters, fortunately with aspirations reaching farther than they could throw a punch. But that was also the turning point for Vaan, as not long afterwards he decided it was 'way too risky' in this city for them to go around together, and said they should separate until things calmed down hunter-wise.
"And for no visitors." Larsa clipped curtly after an awkward pause, which threw Penelo's eyes to the floor - feeling humiliated by the fact that he didn't even recognize her.
"Who is this?" He added as she shuddered: had she really changed that much? Was six years that long? She recognized him easily enough, although it wasn't hard: Larsa still looked like himself… just an older, more arrogant form of the thirteen-year-old she once knew.
"She is no one, My Lord." The attendant stated spitefully and quickly dismissed any more of the Emperor's attention on her, "Just a lost citizen here for the interviews being held today. Take no…" he attempted to say, but never managed to finish the sentence for the Emperor's blatant disinterest.
"Then one would hope she can clean better than she takes directions." He commented to no one in particular and closed the door again, while Penelo continued to gawp in shock and choking disappointment. Although the guard didn't give her much of a chance to breathe, let alone think… Or panic more precisely: as how in Occuria's name could she ask Larsa to help her when he couldn't even remenber who she was?
"The door is down the way you came, down the stairs and straight ahead." The assistant told Penelo without hesitation as she hung her head and began to bite her lower lip in distress, "It's hard to miss." Wounded, she backed down the corridor in defeat but upon reaching the stairwell took a right instead – having decided that she was not going to be ordered about by a man like that… in fact, make that men: Larsa was just as bad as his conceited little lackey.
Penelo wandered aimlessly down the lengths of hallway in somewhat of a depression, trailing a fingertip along the walls absent-mindedly while staring disdainfully at the bruises on her knuckles: fighting your way through two heavily built Seeq, a bangaa and an armed Hume wasn't exactly easy, nor did one emerge unflawed from it. Unless of course your name was Vaan, then no matter how many hits you took you'd always look the same: innocently surprised and perhaps a little ruffled if something had happened somewhere at some point in the not-too-distant-past.
'So I'm not perfect.' She thought dejectedly while fingering her tinted hair, she hadn't wanted to dye it – neither had Vaan. He'd actually pleaded with her to leave it alone but she was too freaked out after the fight; so picked up a cheap henna stain at a street stall and did it that night over a sink, intending of course to change her appearance from the description out on the streets and throughout the clan network, hopefully buying herself a little time and anonymity.
'I'm the same…I haven't changed…he has.' she decided nonchalantly, but once again was unable to actually finish thinking the problem through when an open door along the corridor hailed a nasal whine of disdain as she passed by.
"Well it's about time!" The resident cried, and Penelo looked aside to see a stubby man with wiry brown hair and liver spots on his face glaring at her over a desk piled high with parchment and silver serving trays. "I called for someone hours ago – it is freezing in here, the pot has gone cold and there's nothing left in the grate but ashes!" Despite having absolutely no idea what the man was on about Penelo took a tentative step towards the doorframe, mostly out of curioisty and feeling rather like a rabbit caught in the headlights of whoever-this-was's command. Whereas the Emperor's treasurer, Nathaniel Parckle, stared expectantly at the servant outside his office for a moment then snapped again when she didn't make any further movements towards his means.
"Are you deaf? Get in here!" he spat and Penelo obeyed out of instinct, shuffling into the chaotic room and glancing around at the wall-to-wall bookcases, only broken by a fireplace in which the embers were almost gone.
"You will simply have to rebuild the whole thing from scratch now." Stated the clerk and pointed towards the ashen logs, "Which should teach you to be slack." Noticing the pile of timber right next to the hearth Penelo couldn't help but cast him a bemused look. "And try to do it before I perish in this ice cavern." Nathaniel added when the air-headed girl still stared at him as if he was speaking in another language.
"Couldn't you have put the logs on yourself?" She asked innocently, but he merely snorted, gestured to the logs again and returned to his work. Unwilling to actually build a fire but also unable to ignore the instructions of this rather intimidating man, Penelo decided to throw a couple of the logs into the grate and cast a quick fira spell on them to remedy the problem. Nathaniel looked up briefly as she chanted the words of the enchantment, intrigued as to what she was actually doing, but when the branches crackled and spat into life they soon answered for her actions.
Naturally he would never admit it but Nathaniel was a little surprised by the girl's mastering of black magic, such expertise was not a common occurrence at her low level of servitude. But he merely remarked "That will do." smarmily and caused Penelo to consider another spell or two in his direction…namely silence and death.
"Now go fetch me another tea tray, this pot is stone cold and I am not a peasant." The treasurer ordered Penelo without even glancing up from his work or breaking his tally of calcuations. "And if you are late I will have you discharged- what is your name?" Penelo hurriedly took the opportunity to mumble obeidance and disappear from the office in pretence of acting on Nathaniel's words, but without disclosing any compromising details such as her name, merely a promise to return 'as soon as possible, sir'.
However, the questioning of that highly-strung imperial reminded Penelo, as she continued her haphazard exploration of the palace, that she really ought invent a false name…and probably a whole new identity while she was at it. Accidentally blurting her real name would ruin just about everything, as it would take approximately an hour for word of a Penelo in any part of Arcades to reach the ears of clan Cerberus, and in a coffin was not the next place she wanted to meet up with Vaan.
'Screw this up, Penelo, and everything goes to pot.' She warned herself and began to descend a tightly wound spiral staircase towards what might be the servants quarters, well, it had as good a chance of being down there as any of the rooms in Larsa's residence, 'you can do this. Vaan said you'd be fine. You will be fine. You will be…'
"You will be fine." Vaan remarked casually, as if she was a weather report - Ttoday: Penelo will be fine, tomorrow expect showers and heavy thunderstorms. It is advised to stay indoors and hide under the covers until she passes.'
"But, Vaan," She pleaded helplessly while watching him dash around the room stuffing a few of his things into a bag, "you can't…don't…please…" He paused and glanced at her over his shoulder; he wouldn't dare tell her but she looked strange with brown hair…well, to him at least. Nevertheless he dropped the bag and walked slowly over to her, sat on the end of the bed scrunching the grimy covers in both fists.
"Just until the heat passes," he told her, "it won't be long, Penelo, I promise." Vaan reached for her hands but she wouldn't release her iron grip on the bed sheets, so he settled them on her shoulders instead and then crouched down to look her in the eyes.
"You will be fine, Penelo." He said, slowly going over each word as if they could cast a spell on her. She tried not to shake, but it was scary, Vaan was her safety net. She wasn't sure if she could just carry on without him, feeling more inclined to falling and breaking her neck upon attempting the high wire alone. Nevertheless she attempted to smile at him and he leaned in to tentatively peck her on the lips, a tried-and-very-well-tested comfort. Then she really did smile, as after all the time they'd been 'together' Vaan was still nervous about kissing her.
"Kay?" he murmured quietly, but just as she was going to let go of the bed for him he backed away to resume packing.
"I guess…" She sighed with a shudder at the scrape of the bedroom window opening, and with a self-assured grin Vaan crawled out the hatch, shouting a faint 'love you!' up at the window Romeo-and-Juliet style once he'd reached the street below, before swiftly vanishing into the night.
Tucking her legs up underneath her and picking at her fingernails Penelo sighed again and whispered 'love you too,' before getting up to put out the light, and then cocooning herself in the covers, she cried a little before falling asleep; wondering where Vaan was going to stay…and what she was going to do until he came back.
Whoa, that took me a lot longer to do than I expected. (pretends it is because her work is improving and takes more time to get right)
Worst thing about finishing a chapter: you have to go back to the bare basics of the next one. I.e getting the basic words out so you can go and re-process them later, like a meat grinder...
You know, there is a special layer of hell reserved for those who read fic and do not leave a review. A theme park. But all the rides have giant queues and the rollercoasters do horrible, unholy, torturous things to you, which aren't even fun. And the food is...well, it's theme park food, need I say more?
On the other hand, the tickets are free if you drown a kitten at the entrance ;P (God I'm crazy today.)