Black eyes, something that I could remember from when I woke up were just these black eyes that were starring at me with this look of happiness to them. I could not tell what they wanted from me but it seemed that everything I said came out to be a big blur, I screamed, but it sounded like I was underwater. I tried to ask where I was, but he just smiled and disappeared. . . I know, it sounds a little off but he was just. . . gone. I tried to get up, but my arms were so weak that I just fumbled back onto my back and into the dirt. I screamed at loud as I could, but it still sounded like I was underwater, I yelled and screamed and all I could remember were those black eyes and how they looked. . .
" Sam. . . Sam come over here, the screaming is coming from over here." A woman yelled as she started to run toward me.
Sam, tall, Halloween, Stanford, cookies, brother, yellow eyes, smiling, a house, fire. All of these things started to fly past my eyes, some were just words and some of the other things were pictures, I could not understand any of it, but all of these things just started to flash before me, I could not understand any of it who same was. . . maybe my brother? I did not know, but I could see a little house and I knew that there was something to do with Standford college. Something about these smiling yellow eyes and on Halloween and chocolate chip cookies. All of this just because of the people that were running this way. . .
" Oh my god. . ." The woman said again as she dropped down next to me. " Are you alright?" She said as she tired to help me up. . . my hearing was slightly coming back.
" I'm calling 911." The man yelled as he moved around. " Is she breathing?" He yelled.
" Barley." She said as she looked down at me. " Can you hear me." She smiled. . . she had a very kind smile to her, I nodded and she looked over at the man who must be named Sam. " Hurry."
As the man spoke all I could do was think about my life that I did not know anything about, I wanted to tell them everything I knew, asked if they knew me or who I was, but for that moment I could not speak and did not know what to do. I just laid in the dirt and looked up at the kind woman who was trying to make sure that I kept with her and to make sure that I did not slip into contentiousness. I could see the light coming from the ambulance and everything started to go into a slower motion from there. . . The people that were running to me seemed to be on one of those beach shows that they did the slow walk in, the girl that was holding me seemed like a hero or a victim from a movie and the man named Sam just seemed to be a mystery to me. I just starred up at the dark night and tried to stay with them that they took me into the ambulance and to the hospital.
They told me that I did not have a name, that they did not know who I was or where I had come from because I didn't not either. They tired looking through a data base with my finger prints, with my blood, anything that they could think of and all of it was coming up with a dead girl, which could not be me. . . They said that there must have been something wrong with their system and they just brushed it off from there, all I could do was think about who I was and where I had come from, who this Sam was that I knew of and how I got into Stanford, or if I was just visiting this Sam there. They said that it could take me forever to re-gain all of my memory and that I may never get all of it back because I am blocking something out. Until then they said that I was going to have to stay in the hospital until I could remember someone to take care of me, I said that I knew of a Sam and the Sam that saved me said that he would take me in, they thought maybe he was my Sam and somehow allowed me to go home with him. They gave me the name Jessica because of the dead girl that seemed to have the same prints as me. . . they never really gave me a last name, they allowed me to take up Sam's last name of Milton.
I soon found out that the Sam that had saved me was dating the woman with the kind smile- her name was Hannah, she seemed to be a very kind hearted girl and seemed to always know things to say to make everything work out. Sam was going to ask Hannah to marry him before all of this happened, I could not believe that any of this had happen. . . not to Sam, he just seemed too good to really die the way that he did, I mean it all just seemed to unbelievable to me that he was just jump into the lake outside of our house in the middle of winter and let himself freeze to death, it just did not seem like him at all! He had the perfect life and then boom, all of a sudden he killed himself, the funny thing is that he had this song going on blasted through the house before he went outside. . . He had been playing Cold As Ice By Foreigner. It just kind of made me think that it was a little funny that he would do that. I had to be there for Hannah thought, through all of this she needed someone to be there and I guess that I was that someone that just happened to be there.
She said that an FBI agent wanted to ask me a few questions about what happened when I found him but I said that I really wasn't up for it when she came in to tell me, she tried to get them to go away but he just kept on going saying that they needed to talk to the first witness. I really died not want to do this. . . I mean the man that I just met that had just saved me from death not more then three months ago was now dead and of course I was the first one to follow his footprints. . . which kind of looked more like dragging prints, to the pound to find him waist down in a pound! They all seem to think that I did to it him, like I knew him enough to throw him into a pound. She said he was really cute looking, like I wanted to hook up with someone from the FBI, I just sighed and went downstairs and met the agent sitting at our little table in the kitchen, drinking a beer.
" Aren't you on duty?" I said as I moved from behind him to the other side of the table looking him in the face. He just starred me right in the face for a few seconds with his mouth opened, I wondered if I had something on my face. " Are you alright?" I asked as I sat down.
" Yeah. . . it's just. . . Jessica?" His voice sounded so. . . known to me, like a voice that I have heard in my past.
Dean. Brother. Taken away. Yellows Eyes. Brady. Making Cookies. Sam and I had met over a year before Dean came back into his life, said that he needed to take Sam away to find their father. Missing on a hunting trip. Sounded wrong. All of this hit me like a ton of bricks, it all looked so long ago, it was the same face, just a little older and seemed to be a little wore out, but deferentially the same face. This was Dean, the brother of Sam, who I had been rooming with? Maybe he was a friend of mine, things were starting to come together though. Their father had gone missing on a hunting trip, they went away, then someone named Brady came over and made cookies with me? Still those yellow eyes were the thing that did not make sense, they were in my head so vividly. They were this almost golden eyes that were just all that color, no white or anything, just yellow. It was like something that I had never seen before, just like the black eyes that I had first woken up to. . . I must be going crazy.
" You know me?" I questioned. The flash back must have taken a little bit of time because he had moved from his chair and was now by my side.
" Yeah, but how are you alive?" He asked, he has a really puzzled look on his face. " Wait you don't remember me? I'm hurt." He gave a smirk before it turned back into a serious face.
" No, I do not remember anything. How long have I been gone for? Who I am? Who are you? Who in the hell is Sam. Brady." I asked and he just looked at me in shock.
" How much do you know?" He asked as he sat back in his chair, at the moment Hannah came into the room.
" Is everything in here okay?" She smiled as he looked over at Dean and then to me.
" Just fine Ma'am." Dean smiled as he placed his hands on the table.
" He knows me Han, he knows me and my name!" I smiled as I looked up at her.
" How?" She questioned, her smiled breaking away from her face.
" He's Sam's brother." I said as I looked over at him. " Right?" I looked for reinsurance, he nodded.
" So you remember that?" He said as he looked down at something and then back up at us. " Well you are Sam had been going to Sanford and you two were dating for awhile, but there was this terrible house fire one night, they thought that they had found your body in the burn, they thought that since Sam just got home from. . . from a family trip that it must have been your body. So they really didn't search for you." He said as he looked down at his palms.
" How long ago was this?" I asked as I looked him in the eyes.
" Six years in November." He said as he smiled and looked up a me. He seemed so. . . different from the little memory I had of him.
" How's Sam doing?" I smiled as I had some memories about Sam
I knew that he was really tall, that I can remember because even with heels on I did not match him in height and no matter how hard I tried I could never remember him. I now remember that he hated Halloween and would never dress up for it for who knows what reasons, he just did not talk much about creatures or anything cool like that. He had short brown hair that I always found fun to plan with before we went to sleep. Always had a strong build, I felt so safe in his arms because they felt so secure and just strong. The way that he smiled would always give me a little bit of a shiver because it was so beautiful and he never thought so. I told him once right before I blank that without me he would crash and burn. His hugs were the things that made me the happiest though, they always made me feel safe and happy and like nothing could bring me down. . .
" Well. . . he'll sure as hell be happy to know that you are alive and that you are fine. Trust me on that." He smiled as he looked back down at something and then back up at us.
" Well did he ever ya know. . . get back together with anyone else? Is he married?" I asked as I looked down and frowned. I hope he's not married. I thought.
" He's been in a lot of bad. . . really bad relationships. But god no. . . never married." He said as he took a sip out of his beer.
" Dean. . . did you ever find your father? You both left on a hunting trip and that's when I kind of blank." I sighed as I looked out the window that was behind Dean's head.
" Umm. . . yeah, we did find our father. He was just fine." He said as he gave a little of a smile, but that faded as well.
" Well great. I hope that you three are getting along now. You know the whole time that we were in college neither one of you came to see Sam, he never really talk about you or even really got calls from either of you." I said and then it hit me, another flashback.
Sam and I sitting on the couch of our little apartment and just talking about family, just sitting there and talking. Mostly about mine, how much I missed my parents and how he could come and meet them because they would love him like I did. . . How my dad would pretty much burn him to the bone and then learn to have a taken to him because that's what my dad does and my mom would just love him to pieces because she's heard so much of him. He just smiled at me and said that he really would love to but he never really knows what to say in front of parents and that it may be a really bad thing, but I had talked him into it, I didn't know how but I had and we were going to go during winter break. I tried to ask when I would get to meet his family, knowing that his mom was dead and it was just his brother and dad doing some family business. He just gave me that smile and melted me away and said that I would most likely never get to meet either one of them because they really didn't care enough to be around. But if they did that I would be the first one to know about it because that was what he wanted the most.
" You okay Jess?" Dean asked, putting down his beer onto the table.
" Just a flashback." I though as I looked at him, I wondered what Sam looked like today.
" She's been getting these a lot." Hannah said as she placed her hand on my shoulder.
" Well anyway, yeah me and Sam are really close now. I mean you can't break us apart really. He smiled as he looked back at something again and then to us. Come to think about it I think that you and me should go and see him, right now." Dean smiled as he got up from his chair, Hannah and I did the same thing.
" Really? Right now?" I don't think so, I'm not even dressed and God knows I much look like a mess." I said as I looked down at myself, an old Rolling Stones shirt and some shorts, that was attractive.
" Trust me, you will look amazing to Sam." He smiled as he started to walk through the house to the front of the house.
" Wait. You aren't even going to ask her about what happened when she found Sam?" Hannah asked.
" Not really, we can come back and do that anytime. This girl has been a missing person or dead for almost six years now. Trust me, if you knew my brother, you would know that this was something that he would never believe even if he saw her." He smiled again, but this time it kept to his face as he walked out the front door, waiting for me on the steps though.
" Do you really think that this is a good idea Jessie? I mean you do not even know the dude and now your just going to get into his piece of shit care and go off to god knows where for who knows how long?" She asked as he grabbed onto my wrist.
" Yeah." I smiled as I tried to pull away but she grabbed onto my wrist tighter. " Han, he is the only one that knows about my past, the only one that knows who I really am. I know that he is the person that he is saying that he is, I have a memory about him as well. I know that this seems crazy, but I know that I can trust him. I know that I can." I smiled as I touched her hand with my other one. " Promise I'll be said." I smiled as I grabbed my bag on the floor near the door, it had bear mace and a rape whistle in it, I think that I would be just fine. I go onto the porch and looked at his black, beautiful car in front of the house.
I watched it leave from the apartment as they were both in it, just leaving and not even looking back to say goodbye. I knew that Sam was going to come back, I knew that he would be back in time for his interview on Monday, he had to because it was his life, but there was just a feeling something was going to go wrong. I tried to brush it off and just keep going on, but it was such a hard weekend without him, I had never been more then a few hours without him before we met and now it was just like we was gone now. I decided as a welcome back present that I would make him some chocolate chip cookies, they smelled so good and I was so proud. When I took them out and finished making the little note to go along with it Brady came over, we talked for a little then. . . Blank, nothing after that.
" Dean?" I asked as I buckled into the passenger seat of the Impala.
" Huh?" He asked as he placed the key into the car and it roared to life and then it turned into a beautiful purring sound.
" Sam did go back to college right?" I asked and we drove rather fast down my street and then onto the highway. Dean did not answer me for awhile so I nudged him with my elbow.
" Umm. . . no. He got too caught up in the business to really get back into college. I mean if I could I would allow him to back any day that he wanted, but I mean we all get sucked in once in awhile." He said.
" So all of Sam's family, inducing you, are in the FBI?" I asked as I looked forward through the windshield to see that we were getting off and going into a motel right on the next to the highway.
" Yeah." He said but the tone did not sound right at all, we pulled into one of the parking lots and got out, before we really could enter he just stopped and held the door shut. " Before we go in, expect some weird things to come out of his mouth, really weird things." Dean said as he walked in, and there he was Sam Winchester. I stood there and puzzled over him for a little and then another flashback hit me.
On the ceiling. Being placed there and not being able to speak. Slashed by the stomach and blood was just dripping all around me, no one could hear me though, I felt dead but I wasn't. I was just hanging there, where Brady had placed me and told me to stay there. I didn't understand how I did not fall, but it felt like two hands were just keeping me up there supporting me. But at the same time it felt as if someone was just putting a little too much pressure on my stomach and just letting all of the blood ooze out of me like was a stress ball that he could play with. There was something off about him, I begged him to stop, he was my friend, why was he doing this? He just smiled, eyes going black and slashed my stomach open wide, threw me without even touching me onto the wall and somehow got me onto the ceiling, turned the shower on and then left. Then Sam came home. . . After that was just one word that came to mind. Fire.