A/N: Written for HSWW (Challenges and Assignments)
Assignment #8: Careers Advice: Task: write a funny story about the HoH discussing their students after their career meetings. Extra prompts: (word) pregnancy, (emotion) embarrassing
Showtime: Eyes on the Prize I: (character) Minerva McGonagall
Buttons: (character) Severus Snape
TV Show of the Month: Neil Melendez - (object) watch, (word) late, (location) bar
Around the World in Thirty-One Days: 144. Saint Lucia - Character: Severus Snape
Cliche Day: Everyone Lives!AU
Word Count: 1,223
The bar curves into the room, dark in the barely lit room. Through the windows, the diamonds of lead panes, trickles the sallow light of street-lamps.
Minerva looked at her watch, waiting for the others to arrive. It wasn't late by any means, but she just so happened to arrive to the bar first.
"Punctual as always, Minnie," drawled Severus from behind her.
Minerva turned her head swiftly in his direction with a glare. "I've transfigured your robes into a dress once before, do not make me do it again," she threatened.
"So...hostile," Severus said as a smirk grew on his face. "You should loosen up that bun on your head."
"Leave the woman alone, Severus," Pomona piped in as she reached the bar. "She's had a long day, as we all have."
Severus' smirk changed into a sneer. "No need to remind me of this horrid day. Speaking of reminders, someone should remind me why I agreed to meet you all here in the first place."
Before Minerva could reply, Filius' voice came from somewhere. "You need a drink as much as we do. I'm actually surprised any of you said yes!"
Severus looked down to find the shorter professor and shook his head. "Sorry, almost didn't see you there," he remarked sarcastically.
Filius shook his fist angrily at Severus, who was sporting a smug look.
"Leave Filius alone too," Pomona scolded. "Again, we are here to relax away from the castle and away from the memories of today's meetings."
Severus turned his attention to the barmaid that was looking at them. "Five glasses of your strongest thing here."
Minerva frowned. "Five?"
"I'm going to need a double if I'm going to vent with the rest of you," Severus said matter-of-fact.
Filius huffed before trying to get on top of the stool. He reached for the first bar on the stool and pushed himself on it, but his short legs wouldn't allow him to step on the second one. It looked like he was a child failing to get in his chair properly.
Pomona helped Filius onto his stool, and Filius gave her a grateful nod. Severus rolled his eyes. "That was highly dramatic," he commented.
Minerva cut her eyes to Severus and smacked his arm. Severus turned swiftly to Minerva and held his arm. "Be careful, Minerva," he said, "I would have for you to turn permanently into a cat."
"You wouldn't dare," she hissed.
"I dare you both to stop teasing one another and act like adults!" Pomona exclaimed.
Minerva cleared her throat while Severus made a grunting noise. Filius looked to Pomona and laughed. "Good one, Pomona!" Filius said through his laughter.
The five glasses were filled with bubbly and Severus swiftly reached for two. "I never want to sit with another Potter ever again," he said, drinking from his first glass.
"What did Albus do this time?" Minerva asked with a sigh.
"Which Albus?" Filius muttered with a quick snort, laughing at his own comment. Pomona shook her head before she sipped from her drink.
Severus looked down to the bar top, spinning his glass. "He walked into my classroom, sat down as if he were ready to discuss the career, and he simply cries. Of all the sniveling children I had to face, it had to be Potter's child."
The other three Heads shot Severus a sympathetic yet 'really' type of look. Severus shrugged it off before taking another drink from his glass.
"I would normally frown upon drinking anything of the sort, but I need something after the meeting with Miss Chapman," Minerva said with a heavy sigh.
Pomona frowned. "What happened, dear?"
Minerva shook her head. "I had to spend the entire time discussing with the girl that a pregnancy is not a job!"
Filius was mid-sip when Minerva said that, and it caused him to choke. Severus made a snickering noise behind his glass while the ladies tried to help the reddened Filius. When he was in the clear to say something, Filius slammed his hand on the table.
"What is wrong with this generation?" he demanded.
Severus rolled his eyes. "Please. We'd be lucky to have children next year that even have an ability to create coherent sentences."
Minerva pinched the bridge of her nose before sipping from her glass. Pomona had her lips pursed, shaking her head before slowly bringing the glass to her lips.
"How was your meetings, Pomona," Filius asked, hoping to get a light answer.
Pomona looked down and immediately shook her head.
"It can't be that dreadful," Minerva urged with a frown.
Her cheeks tinged a hint of red, and Severus raised his eyebrow at her action. "It cannot be as bad as another crying Potter."
Minerva pointed a warning finger at Severus, who narrowed his eyes at the action. She turned her attention back to Pomona.
Filius stared at Pomona with a mildly calculated look. It could have been his bubbly entering his system, but something caused him to snort with a laughter.
"I know what you did," he said.
Pomona stared at Filius with wide eyes. "Do not!"
"I do so," he said.
"You have no proof of anything!"
"I can see it in your eyes, Pomona."
"It was only cast once! Mr. Turner wouldn't stop getting into things and–!" Pomona covered her mouth and turned her body towards the bar top.
Filius grinned smugly. "Now we really know what you did."
"You goaded her," Minerva said with an appalled look. She huffed and turned to Pomona. "You know that is unacceptable, Pomona!"
Severus mocked a surprise look. "The Head of House that represents tolerance isn't so tolerant?" he asked. "Our world may just end."
"For Merlin's sake, Severus," Minerva sighed before taking another sip from her glass.
Pomona's fingers danced on her glass. "I apologized the minute it slipped out of my mouth! Mr. Turner simply ran away. I have felt absolutely dreadful ever since."
Filius smiled at her. "We've all had quite a day. It's alright," he said.
She gave a slight smile back before sipping from her drink.
"What about you, Filius," Severus spoke up.
"W-What?" Filius turned to him.
"You just said 'we've', so what happened to you?" Severus looked at him expectantly. Minerva and Pomona followed suit.
Filius hummed to himself and continued drinking from his glass before requesting another. "Oh you know," he waved his hand dismissively, "a word here, a charm there…"
"Filius…" Minerva trailed off with a warning tone.
He threw his hands up in the air. "Alright, alright! The children should have manners, but do they? Not at all! I had to spell my books to remain in their place because they stole them! I couldn't discuss things at eye level thanks to their pranks!"
Severus actually laughed. Pomona had a small snicker slip through her lips, and Minerva could only sip from her glass again. "Of all my years of teaching at that school, this is by far the most troublesome," she said.
"How does one surpass the shenanigans of Harry Potter and his friends?" Pomona asked rhetorically.
Severus decided to answer anyway. "Simple, by having Potter's offspring," he said with a sneer.
Filius had no comment; he was too busy crying to himself and his drink about the prank the children pulled on him.