A Different Point of View:

by Dragonheart (ryuu_sama@hotmail.com)

Rating: It's only a G. I promise it's clean. All you get corrupted with is a strange sense of humor! Won't that be fun?

Summary: Hilarity ensues when a fangirl winds up scoring an interview with a certain oddly charismatic villain. Can the Care Bears help when things go awry?

Feedback & Distribution: The address is above. All comments, criticism, and howls of fury can be sent there. The author respectfully requests that you get her permission before re-posting this or archiving it elsewhere. Thanks!

Notes, Disclaimers, and Whatever: No Heart is the property of Nelvana. Other characters belong to various entities like DIC, Hallmark, and whoever else has done stuff with the Care Bears. Suffice to say I don't own them and I'm not making any money. Sharon belongs to herself, however.

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(classical-type music plays. The scene dissolves to a study with two leather-upholstered armchairs and a fire in the fireplace. Sharon sits in one of the chairs looking very serious in a silk blouse, navy-blue blazer, and pleated skirt)

Sharon: (arguing with someone off-screen) Look, I know you don't like it, but we've got a show to do here and- (notices she's on) Heh, hello there! Today on "Fireside Chat", I'll be interviewing a rather famous figure in the Kingdom of Caring-

Grumpy Bear: (holding boom mike) I can't believe this is happening...

Sharon: (glares and hisses) Quiet! (turns back to camera with determinedly cheerful expression)Well, without further ado, direct from his dark and stormy domain, the evil No Heart!

(No Heart appears in the next chair in a burst of lighting)

Tenderheart: (operating camera, groans) He promised he wasn't going to do that! It ruins the leather!

Grumpy: I still don't see why we're letting him in the studio!

Tenderheart: We promised a truce for the time it takes to do the interview- (notices Sharon glaring) Yipe! Sorry!

Sharon: (taking a deep breath and calming down) So...No Heart. I see to this day you remain on shaky terms with the Care Bears.

No Heart: Yes. It's all just a matter of ideological differences. Really, I'm the victim here.

Sharon: Oh. You feel that you've been unfairly judged?

No Heart: Indeed! The cartoon series was entirely one-sided. Only presenting the Care Bears point of view, you see.

Sharon: But isn't it true that you want to destroy all the love and feelings in the world? (holds up a teapot) Orange Zinger?

No Heart: (holding out teacup) Please! Thank you. Well, yes, I had to attempt to destroy the world's feelings. It was part of my contract, you understand.

Sharon: (nodding) I see. So your "evil reign of terror", I believe it's been called, was really nothing more than very good acting?

No Heart: Exactly! I had a job to do as the villain and I did it most admirably. For that, I've spent years being persecuted and maligned-

Grumpy: (muttering) With good reason...

(Sharon and No Heart both glare)

No Heart: Where was I?

Sharon: Persecution, I believe?

No Heart: Ah, yes! Can you imagine how different the story would have been if the cartoon had been made about me? They glossed over things like the successful barbershop quartet I formed with Cold Heart, Dr. Fright, and the Wizard of Wonderland or my dear niece's interest in modeling!

(Sharon and the crew shudder briefly at the thought of Shrieky modeling)

Sharon: Well that's fascinating. So, there's a whole side to you that we've never seen.

No Heart: Certainly. So many people buy the party line in this. It's most unfortunate.

Sharon: Indeed, it is. (checks her watch)Well, we seem to be running short on time, so I'd just like to clear up one issue.

No Heart: And what might that be?

Sharon: Well, there's been a lot of speculation as to your true appearance. We wondered if you would be willing to let down your hood before our live audience?

No Heart: Well...I don't normally...oh, all right! (reaches up and pulls his cowl away from his face. He resembles a green-skinned Leonardo DiCaprio. There is a horrified gasp from the assembled audience)

Sharon: (pales) Well...you saw it here first, ladies and gentlemen! Thank you, No Heart, for that exclusive.

No Heart: (replaces his cowl) Certainly. And now that my interview has concluded...it is time to destroy you all! (his hands start glowing. A rapid Care Bear Stare knocks him out of the studio before he does any damage.)

Sharon: (indignant) He promised not to do that! He swore blind while we were in rehearsal that he wasn't going to do that!

Tenderheart: (pats her shoulder) There, there. At least you got your interview.

Sharon: (brightens up) That's true. Well, that concludes this edition of Fireside Chat. Thank you for tuning in!

Tenderheart: Cut! And that's a wrap!

***