Blank Eyes
Summary: Sai makes a wish...And gets more than he bargained for. Now he can not only see auras and feel emotions, but is also thrown back into the past. It was no angel that granted his wish, surely. Timetravel fic. AU, pairings undecided.
Disclaimer: I love Sai, but I do not own him, or Naruto in general.
blankeyesBLANKEYESblankeyes
A battle raged in Konohagakure. The Akatsuki was closing in; among them, Sasuke. Most were in the village, fighting for their lives. Others were further away. Sai was one such boy. On the way back from a solo mission, he had stopped by a small river. It was a tranquil place — thick greenery surrounded the trickling crystal water, and vines shielded the sanctuary from passers-by. However, what Sai was currently experiencing was far from tranquility.
The teenager lay on the ground. He clutched his head in a desperate attempt to get away from the memories.
"Brother..!"
"Sai..."
Yet while this boy was writhing in agony, he was somewhat...Satisfied. He could feel. While he could feel, he could live.
And he wanted to live.
Sai had no particular reason for living. If anything, one like him would probably decide that it would be better for them to be dead. But not Sai. Sai was different.
Sai was special.
While his emotions lay locked away, rare surges of anger and pain shattered his passive face, reminding him of their existence. Sai was not emotionless. If one is human, one has emotions. His emotions were just very, very well concealed.
Concealed under a self-forced mask.
He would crack the mask at times, like if his life was in danger. But lately...Lately he had been cracking the mask just for the sake of it. For the sake of proving to himself that he was still perfectly working ninja material, and had not gone psycho like some of his previous peers.
And now, lost in his thoughts, his pain subsided. Sai glanced at a few floating lilies in the stream. He scrambled onto a rock under a blooming Sakura tree. It was not yet night, but the sky had changed to a navy colour.
This was just how he liked it.
Just the silence...And him. They were good friends, but Sai never greeted Silence, in fear of breaking it. And Silence seemed offended by his lack of politeness, thus not greeting him either.
That's what it seemed like to Sai, anyway.
He didn't mind.
And, today, just like any other day, Sai wondered what it would be like to understand and feel emotions, their full range, and to understand and see it in others...
No, not just wondered.
He wished.
He wished for what was possible to every human being apart from, apparently, him. He wished to crack the mask completely...And permanently.
His wishing wasn't passionate. Sai wasn't like Naruto. But, his wishing was honest.
Just like usual.
His dull black eyes registered a light in the corner of his eye, slowly advancing. He prepared to draw his blade, not hinting in the slightest that he had noticed another presence. But it did no good.
"I know you can feel me here. Put the sword down, I'm only here to talk," this light spoke. Vaguely wondering who it was, Sai complied. He didn't feel a threat.
"Show yourself," he said in an even tone. The light - sighing? - shifted closer, and Sai saw a black-haired woman with...Interestingly, amber eyes, clad in a beige robe.
She wasn't really very beautiful. The black hair was only about shoulder-length, and looked quite ragged. Around her late thirties, the woman's figure was quite curvy, and he could see her skin around her eyes starting to wrinkle. She looked quite plain and ordinary. Oh yes, not counting the amber eyes. Still. He'd seen worse - 'Ugly', more commonly known as Haruno Sakura being a prime example, what with that pink hair and all.
Sai blinked slowly. "Who are you?" he asked, with that same, emotionless voice.
"Nevermind me. I'm here for you, to get your wish granted, since you've wished for the same thing 101 times now. Lucky number, you understand. Right, anyway, what was it? Understand and feel emotions, and understand and see them in others? Ahh, that's quite easily granted. At least you're not one of them people demanding tonnes of gold, which they can't even carry home," She snorted. At this point, one of her plain and ordinary fingers reached out and touched Sai's forehead. "Wish granted. Just for you, I've added a special bonus gift. Run along now, go play with that sword or something." Then, she disappeared.
It took some time for Sai to register what had just happened. He closed his eyes for a fraction longer than usual, thinking perhaps he had been asleep, and the plain and ordinary woman (excluding her amber eyes, of course) was a dream. But when he opened them, he...Quite literally, freaked. And then, he freaked again, because he was actually freaked, an emotion he had not experienced for a decade or so...
Either way, the cause of this confusing chain of events is that everything looked more...Colourful.
The trees glowed.
The lilies glowed.
Lifting up his hand and looking at it, the hand too glowed.
All bright and colourful, each glow a different hue.
And then, Sai started to...Cry?! He had no idea where the tears had come from. Was he joyful because the sight was so beautiful and coloured? Was he that scared that a few seriously strange things had just happened in fast succession? Truth is, he had no idea.
This emotion stuff was hard.
-
One thing that was scary was the village.
Sai couldn't find his way to the apartment, because everything in Konoha suddenly looked so different. Every person was surrounded by a different colour, sometimes more than one. Every person had a different expression on their face. Sai was sure his own visage was a horrified one.
Sai's head spun a little.
At a time like this, he needed to draw.
Pulling up into a more-or-less empty alley, he brought out his sketchpad and opened it.
And, looking at the various different pages as he flicked through to find an empty space, his head was suddenly bombarded with names. Titles, even, for his previously unnamed art.
Blue-pink spirals. Aspiration.
Squirrel and nut. Animalism.
Cluster of flowers. Beauty of material.
Rushing stream. Cycle of life.
Self-portrait...Blank Eyes.
Sai couldn't take it any more. He clamped the (glowing) book shut. What had he just gotten himself into?
A lot more than he was caring to admit to, actually.
The trouble was...It didn't end there.
When Sai awoke in that same alley the next morning, he noticed, much to his dismay, that he was not a seventeen-year-old any more.
He was twelve.
There were certain things even trained shinobi found hard to handle.
And the glowing colours did not go away. Sai groaned. His new-found emotions didn't go away either.
Happy days.
-
Sai was unsure of what he should do now. I'll start off by testing out my abilities, he figured. Walking up to a nearby tree, he punched it. The tree cracked and fell to the ground. Then, he brought out some paper and ink. He drew a small, white rabbit. It hopped off the paper and stopped, regarding the pale boy for a few moments curiously, before then continuing away into the woods. So far, so good.
On his back, he found his tantou. Unsheathing it, it felt a little heavier and longer than normal, but that was because he was now smaller. Though slightly slower, he could still swing it well.
Now, what next...My apartment. Where is it? He was, by now, recognizing familiar shapes of Konoha through the glow, but still not enough to find his way back to his apartment. And not only that - Konoha changed a lot in five years. After all, it had been attacked by Orochimaru and then rebuilt again...This 'old Konoha' was hard to navigate.
One particular large building caught his eye - he was relieved to see the Hokage tower. With a small smile (whether it was fake or not, he didn't know) Sai gathered some chakra into his feet and hopped the rooftops until he reached his destination. The boy was just a bit breathless when he got there, but that was enough for him to decide he was going to have to increase his chakra capacity and stamina.
At the door, he greeted the two guards, who were surprised to see the boy.
"Are you not from ROOT?" They queried, suspicious. As a habit, Sai shook his head negative, before remembering that at this time, he probably was...Well, what they didn't know wouldn't hurt them. After a long staring contest, he was finally let in.
He knocked politely on the door and opened it slowly when the response was 'come in'.
He had thought he would see Ugly's (now that he thought about it, she wasn't ugly, but quite pretty...His face filled with a little colour and he promptly stuffed the thought far, far away) tutor Tsunade behind an enormous stack of paperwork, but no - The Sandaime was looking at him calmly. Tsunade's face probably wasn't even on the hokage mountain yet.
"Ah, Sai. Is this about Danzou again?" Sai flinched at the mention of the elder's name. How he despised the man.
Sai really needed to work on not making faces, because his anger was evident. He would need to learn to restrain the pesky emotions. Sandaime, too, seemed a little taken aback by the sudden show of expression. For what seemed like hundreds of years, he had not seen the boy to do such a...human act.
"Is something wrong?" The old man asked softly.
Yes, everything, Sai rolled his eyes - a technique he had picked up from Yamato. He decided to be blunt and tell the whole truth - this was the Hokage, after all, and he needed to know where he lived, and had...Had his apartment even been built yet? Had the ROOT been closed down yet? Had Sasuke-kun left yet? Was he in Team 7 still..?
So he recounted what little he knew. It did sound far-fetched; but the truth is always harder to believe than a lie. "I'm seventeen. I wished for emotion and to see other's emotions. Then a plain and ordinary woman appeared and granted my wish, throwing me back to when I was...am...12 in the process. I can feel. I can see glowing colours around everything, and everyone. Your glow is a jade colour at this very moment. I am not crazy. Is ROOT closed yet? Because I'm not going there. I want to be a normal genin."
Sandaime let this sink in, his face unreadable. As a shinobi, he was used to surprises, although this was probably the most far-fetched recount he'd ever heard. He finally said, "I see. Can you prove this? Tell me any information you wouldn't know about otherwise, or produce any material evidence?"
Sai wondered for a little while. "I could tell you about the Sannin, I suppose..."
"Everyone knows about the Sannin," Sarutobi scowled.
"Not everyone," Sai countered. "But alright, Then I'll tell you about Naruto-kun instead. He has the Kyuubi inside of him, and his father is the Yondaime, and both of those facts are S-class secrets. Would that be enough?" Sai asked. The Sandaime was in shock. Only a select few knew about Naruto's father: and that would be him, Tsunade and Jiraiya.
Not even the ROOT division would have known.
Perhaps especially the ROOT division.
The Hokage gave a slow nod. "Alright. That has me somewhat convinced that there is some truth in your story, at the least. However, if I may ask, how did you know? Even in the...future, such information is absolutely classified, I would hope," he asked curiously and his 'glow' changed to a light orange. Sai shrugged.
"I was on a team with Naruto-kun and Ugly- I mean Sakura," He realised that Sarutobi probably didn't know who 'ugly' referred to. Another nod.
"Very well. I believe I must answer your question. ROOT is to be closed down this very year, so you are excused from it. However teaming you up with someone might prove problematic, as there are no more spaces in the teams...How about furthering your training under a personal sensei? While we have no art specialists, you could learn the art of the sword from Gekkou Hayate," Sandaime proposed, noticing the tantou on Sai's back. Sai gave a small nod. Well, since Sasuke had not left yet, he'd wait until he did. Then he could become one of Team 7 again.
But he didn't want Sasuke to leave the village, either. That guy was so annoying; Team 7 never had a mission that didn't somehow lead to the guy. It was like everywhere one looked, they saw the lone Uchiha.
And then, when it was announced at Itachi's funeral that the elder Uchiha was innocent...Well, it was too late. Sasuke was broken and began planning an attack on Konoha with the Akatsuki.
To surpass Orochimaru and Itachi (although he had heard that Itachi wasn't fighting fully, and was injured heavily before his fight with Sasuke), he was extraordinary. And Konohagakure would have perished.
Thankfully, he didn't have to see it, because he was now 12.
I guess I'll have to be the hero and change some things around, Sai sighed mentally. Maybe I should befriend Shikamaru. He would understand how troublesome my current predicament is. I guess I can't be in Team 7 after all. Well, nevermind, I can befriend them also. It isn't as if I have any other friends. Friends...Maybe I'll be able to truly understand the meaning of the term 'friendship' this time.
"Very well," Sai bowed quite deeply.
"One more thing."
"Yes?"
"If there is to be a war or any other disaster any time soon, kindly inform me right now. I will protect my village," Sarutobi's eyes blazed with determination, and his glow expanded to fill the room with a fiery scarlet. Sai watched the red 'flame' for a moment, entranced by the colour.
"Orochimaru does attempt to invade with Sound and Sand against us during the chuunin exams, with a jinchuuriki, Gaara, on his side," He drawled out thoughtfully. "Well, it doesn't matter too much. Everything ends well with no deaths on our side, apart from one..."
"Oh?"
"To be frank, it was you. You died while sealing Orochimaru's arms in honorable combat. Just like you would have wanted, you died for your village. Your successor was Tsunade." Sai observed as the man's 'glow' - maybe he should start calling it an aura, now - first turned a deep, muddy brown, but then morphed into a soft yellow colour, almost as though he were...Pleased?
"Well, you can avoid that by making sure you kill off Orochimaru during the second exam when he reveals himself. I don't know too much, but according to Naruto-kun, he gave a cursed seal to Uchiha Sasuke. Which then caused him to leave the village, become unbelievably strong, kill the innocent Uchiha Itachi and then join Uchiha Madara in annihilating Konoha. So as you can see, it's best to make sure that doesn't happen under any circumstances. I suggest giving him secret guards, the best of the best. Orochimaru is after Sasuke-kun's body."
It was hard for Sandaime to hear all the horror that Sai was describing. The ex-ROOT member was right. Orochimaru needed to be stopped.
"Oh, and Sandaime-sama, one more thing about Sasuke. I think it best to tell him the truth about Itachi. If he is consumed by revenge once more, it is indeed certain doom. Invite Itachi back to the village. You all think that as long as Uchiha Sasuke feels proud to be an Uchiha, he'll grow strong. Well, let me tell you. He grows too strong. It's best the truth is revealed, before he finds out the hard way and becomes psychotic." Sai smiled a fake smile. It made him feel safe, away from his new found emotions.
"...I will call Hayate shortly. He will then pick you up from the ninja academy, at the same time as every other genin hopeful. Thankyou for the useful information," Sarutobi said, dismissing Sai who bowed and left. He sat, deep in thought for a while.
A strange turn of events...I was hoping for a quite night in with my Icha Icha. Yare, yare... (1)
-
Sai made his way to the academy, like he had been told by the Hokage. This Konoha was most certainly different; but, he liked it this way. So peaceful and undisturbed.
Peace.
How do you do, Peace-san? We haven't seen each other for a long time.
Sai entered the academy, room 201. Inside, he could see many familiar faces, and some unfamiliar ones as well. He wiped away a tear that had accidentally spilled. I'm not sad, Sai scowled. What is it..? I am guessing, this is that infamous happiness I hear so much about...It's warm. Making sure that his eyes were not moist any more, Sai sat down behind Team 7. He observed the kid versions of his teammates - and his worst enemy. Their worst enemy.
Sakura looked so happy, her hair long, admiring Sasuke with hearts in her eyes. Sasuke was same as ever, dark and brooding. But at least this chibi Sasuke didn't have that mad glint in his eye, and didn't look so focused on creating evil plans on how best to carry out a mad massacre in Konoha. It certainly made Sai chuckle quietly. This baby-Sasuke was kind of cute.
Baby Naruto, on the other hand, was quite...Strange. Hyperactive and small - shorter than Ugly! He never thought he'd see the day! -, this Naruto was probably also a ramen addict.
But something unnerved him about the three - no, about the whole room.
Everyone in here was weak.
Very weak.
He didn't even feel dizzy from a colour overload – the auras of the budding shinobi were so weak.
And out of the three in front of him, he assumed, quite correctly, that Sakura was the weakest. After all, she seemed completely infatuated with Sasuke (no wonder he left, Sai snorted), and not only extremely annoying, but useless. He did sense her finely toned chakra control. However, she had, quite literally, almost no chakra to use. Plus, she had not been trained by Tsunade yet, so she couldn't heal, nor could she punch people to their doom.
At that precise moment, she whacked Naruto so hard that he flew to the other side of the class, ramming into a wall.
Oh, alright. In that respect she could be quite strong.
But otherwise, weak and useless. He was willing to bet that the only training she ever did was done at the academy.
Naruto and Sasuke would progress alright, he was sure, but if Sakura was not to be trained soon...Ugh, he hated emotion. Why the hell was he so concerned?
She's my friend.
Sai was defeated by himself. He reached into a concealed pocket in the inside of his jacket and brought out a hook. Then, he looked at one of the shelves the room had, searching the titles for medical ninjutsu. He found one - a beginner's book, but apparently it contained many antidotes for various poisons, as well as a few practical ninjutsu techniques to heal minor wounds and exercises to boost chakra control and capacity. Perfect. In the back, on one of the spare pages, he quickly wrote a note that said, 'If you ever, ever get the chance of meeting the great Sannin Tsunade, don't pass by the opportunity and beg to be her apprentice. You won't be disappointed.'
Then, he wrote another note and stuck it onto the front cover - 'You are weak. Sasuke - and even, believe it or not, Naruto - are stronger than you. If you want to be able to protect your precious Sasuke-kun, you'd better start acting like a real ninja. I suggest you read this book, and make yourself useful with something you're good at. I'll repeat it again, you are weak. You think you're a kunoichi? What good is intelligence if you can't put it to use? Train, Ugly. Maybe then Sasuke will acknowledge you. You should have noticed by now - he hates fangirls.'
He gave a shrug. Sure, he was being harsh, but he had to make Team 7 strong. He had to make them fine shinobi. He had to. This must be responsibility, then.
Using the hook, he dangled the book right in front of Sakura until she noticed it and took it. Then, fast as lightning, he retrieved the hook, and shunshined to a nearby desk so that when Sakura turned around, she wouldn't be able to trace who had written the note. He watched with glee as she read the note and a vein bulged on her forehead, like she was about to explode. Snapping her head around, she attempted to find the insulter, and Sai noticed how she narrowed her eyes suspiciously at Naruto. Her aura seemed to be sharper and a magnolia colour, a very irritated colour, in Sai's opinion. But who could blame her - Naruto was acting like an idiot and screaming right into her ear, and the note's contents wasn't entirely pleasant either. Then, she seemed to calm down a little, and opened the book to read.
Around half an hour later, Iruka arrived to announce the teams.
"...Team 7, Uchiha Sasuke, Haruno Sakura, and Uzumaki Naruto." Everyone laughed at the strange expressions the trio made. Even...Even Sai. After a few more teams, Iruka suddenly looked a little confused.
"I haven't seen you around, and you aren't on the Teams list. Who are you?" he asked, addressing Sai. Everyone else finally noticed the pale artist as well. Sai felt uncomfortable, being stared at.
"...I'm Sai. I was told by the Hokage to wait here for my sensei," he said carefully. At the mention of Sandaime, everyone instantly stopped prodding any further.
"Alright then, Sai. Well, you are to wait here until your senseis arrive! Then, you are dismissed!" Iruka left the room and instantly teachers appeared.
Team 1. Team 2. Team 3. Team 4. Team 5. Team 6. Team 8. Team 9. Team 10...
Only Team 7 and Sai were left. While Naruto was setting up a trick for the late senseis at the door and Sasuke looked impatient, Sakura was merely absorbed in reading. Well, at least someone's doing something useful, Sai thought. He himself was just observing the three. So this is what it used to be like. Looks nice.
"Ne, ne, Sai, why haven't I seen you before?" Naruto's voice was heard nearby. Sai realised he had zoned out and turned towards the boy.
"Well, I...I guess you could say I was taught in a different academy, but I had to come here today," Sai fake-smiled. Naruto looked so innocent with those large, round, azure eyes. He needn't know about ROOT, not at his age.
"Ah, ok! Well it's good that you've met me today, because I'm the man who's going to be the future Hokage! And since I'll protect this village, I'll be your protector too! I'm Uzumaki Naruto!" Naruto stated proudly. Sai smiled truly this time. Same old Naruto.
"Really? Well then, I'll protect you too if I can, future Hokage-sama. Let's be...friends..?" Sai was unsure of what to say, really - he had never asked anyone to be his friend before. But he was glad he did. Naruto's eyes lit up and he glowed, literally. His wide, foxy grin made Sai suddenly feel inspired to draw him. No, not now.
"Yeah! I'll protect you with my life!" That's right...Naruto had no friends at this point...Well, that will soon change. He'll find plenty of precious people.
At that moment, the door opened and an eraser dropped onto a silver man's head who had been too engaged in conversation to notice it there. While Naruto laughed his head off and Sakura put the book away, both men stepped into the room. One of them looked quite sickly.
"Sai?" he said quietly, before erupting in fits of coughing. Sai looked at the man with interest. That must be Hayate, since he's looking for me. There's a sickly green surrounding his throat...An indication of his illness? I'll ask him sometime later. He stood up and followed the man out of the room, with a small wave to Team 7, of which only Naruto waved back - almost over-enthusiastically. Sai chuckled. They're cute, he decided.
-
"Hokage-sama has informed me of your...Condition.," cough-cough-cough, "So I will not let the training be light." cough-cough. "Before we start, I'm Gekkou Hayate, your new instructor. Though I'm sure you already know that, so let's begin training." COUGH-COUGH-COUGH-cough-cough.
Sai was getting mightily annoyed. If this guy had a girlfriend, she must be really patient.
Thankfully, Hayate's training did not consist so much of talking and theory as of techniques and attacks. It was almost strictly practical. Which was just as well, considering that Sai already knew most of the talking and explaining parts, so they could be skipped without any guilt. Hayate just showed Sai what to do, and Sai copied the moves, testing them out on dummies.
The Kenjutsu was coming along well.
Then, he had to get his body back into top form. So any time he and Hayate didn't have their blades with them or were taking a break from weapons, they would spar together in taijutsu, and practice chakra control, as well as increasing chakra capacity together. Or sometimes, Sai would draw different creatures and attack Hayate with them, who would then defend himself with his sword, killing them off to practice not only Sai's artistic abilities but also keep Hayate in shape.
Sai had to admit, he was growing quite fond of the guy. And somehow, Hayate-sensei turned into Hana-sensei (2). Which was very embarrassing for Hayate, but in Sai's opinion, ridiculously funny.
He had not yet gotten round to asking about Hayate's coughing fits.
However everything was going calmly, until the day that Sai saw that strange woman again. He had been relaxing by that same stream.
She looked exactly like before, plain and ordinary, but her eyes were curious. When Sai noticed her there, she tried to disappear, but was caught by him.
"Oh no, you don't! I need some answers!" he told her firmly and she sighed.
"Let me guess - you want to know what all the glowing colours are, right?" Sai nodded. Lately, he had been trying to push the thoughts about the colours out of the way, because he was so preoccupied with his training. But it still ended up floating around his mind endlessly, especially as they were everywhere, and Konoha still looked like a foreign country.
"Fine, fine. I'll tell you. It's an aura. Everything has an aura, but in living things, the aura indicates their mental state, and how they are feeling. So you wanted to see and understand the feelings of others. Well, I gave it to you. You're gonna have to interpret the colours yourself though, it's different for every person." she explained briefly.
"I see. But... If I'm correct, your aura tells me you're hiding something from me." The woman gulped and looked away.
"I...I was hoping I wouldn't have to tell you, but since it's come down to this...In the chuunin exams, you have to have a team, and...Even though in the future you are a jounin you will still need to take the exams again," the woman breathed out. Sai let go of her.
"So, I need to get a team, right?" the woman nodded, brushing herself off.
"Or you could request to be Uchiha Sasuke's secret bodyguard," the woman suggested. "Then, you can take part in the first and third exams individually." Sai nodded.
"Good idea. Mind telling me who you are?"
"Me? Fine. I'm Veruaha, a wishing spirit. Rest is classified. Bye." And so, she disappeared, leaving Sai with his many yet-unanswered questions staring at the after-glow of where she had been seconds before until it faded away.
blankeyesBLANKEYESblankeyes
This chapter was going to be so much more shorter! In fact, it was going to be a oneshot describing Sai's feelings, and then it morphed into this! How strange! In fact, I was ready to type up the whole story in one chapter, haha. As to who or what is Veruaha, and for what purpose did everything turn out the way it did...More will be revealed later on. Well anyway, enjoy!
(1)Yare yare - Well, well...As in, My, my.
(2)Hana - Flower. Isn't that cute!
PLEASE NOTE: Pairings are undecided; and it is undecided if there will be pairings at all. I currently have a soft spot for NaruAnko, and, without revealing too much, they will become close in the fic; as to whether or not they will be 'together', will probably only become clear further on. Sometimes stories have minds of their own. Thankyou.