Hello again! So I've been having terrible writers block for my story (an epic amount of it on Chairman Meow), and so I was all set to just stew in it. UNTIL, I read this amazing story by an AMAZING author.
The story is 'Snippets' and the author is Spun. And one of the 'Snippets' in her story, 'Waiting' from chapter 3, inspired me to write this very short, very odd, story. I definitely recommend reading that story-it will make you laugh, cry, and grin in every chapter.
There's something Magnus has never told anyone (and likely never will)...
It's stupid, and it makes Magnus want to hide under his covers until the truth has changed, but even if Alec had never been willing to get over Jace... Magnus would've waited. He would've stood in the background, happy to take whatever he could get, even if it was hurried kisses and frenzied sex before Alec had to go back to pretending, and Magnus went back to being alone.
He would've never been able to even imagine this... this perfection, of having Alec smile at him like he'd never smiled at Jace. He wouldn't have tried to guilt Alec into giving up Jace, not after a while. He would've just... stopped.
It goes against everything he's learned in his 800-odd years of life, everything about love and relationships... but Alec's different than anyone else. Alec's the only one Magnus has ever let himself get really attached to, at least the first mortal one. Alec is... everything. He isn't perfect, no, Magnus knows his flaws, but they are far outshone by his good qualities. His shyness (which can barely be considered a flaw at all) is outshone by his sweetness; his stubbornness is outshone by his considerateness, and so on. Alec is more important than anyone else, and so, allowances must be made.
No matter how much it would've killed him inside to see Jace and Alec together (it still does, even though he knows now...) just talking, training, fighting... wondering if Alec would just, leave, one day, because Magnus isn't enough to keep him there, not enough to keep him when he could have (maybe have, possibly have) Jace, strong, brave, reckless Jace.
He would've even let Alec pretend that they didn't have anything together even when they were alone. He would let Alec leave after sex (if they ever had sex...), let Alec go weeks without calling, because he was busy. He would let Alec drop anything, any plans they may have managed to make, because Jace wants this, Jace needs that. Magnus would've let it happen, would've just... let Alec do it.
No matter what Alec would've done, no matter how many times he would've repeated the words he'd already said to Magnus before ("It's not a relationship, Magnus, it's just...", "I'm sorry, Magnus", "I have to go, Magnus"), without the apologies that Alec had repeated dozens of times since then. Even if he would've had to live knowing that Alec didn't belong to him, couldn't belong to him, would never belong to him... He would've done it.
Because Alec is that important.
Because he loves Alec that much.
But... Magnus doesn't have to do that. Because Alec's biggest and brightest quality is his bravery. And Alec is definitely brave enough, to realize that his crush on Jace was merely a deterrent, to come out to his parents, and to love Magnus as Magnus loves him.
So while Magnus might find himself thinking on the 'What if's' of life, he's never allowed to do so for long, because Alec is always close by to bring him right back to what is.
And Magnus is pretty happy with what is.
Tell me what you think, if you liked it, if you wouldn't mind me posting a few more of these (admittedly quite short) little stories over the next few days...
And of course, please, review!