Lazy Note: Hey there, Strangers. So, I got an anonymous request on Tumblr for a CaulScott fic, and upon discovering the lack of such content for the rare ship, here I am. Since I was a little bit disappointed that we didn't get to see more of the AU in episode 4, I decided take matters into my own hands like I like to do. Just go with it.

Are you ready to sin with me?

Enjoy!

Bittersweet

Chapter 1

by

xLazyxWriterx

bit·ter·sweet
/ˈbidərˌswēt/

adjective

1. Sweet with a bitter aftertaste.

2. Arousing pleasure tinged with sadness or pain

It's a strange thing to blink so many times and still see things in contrasting smudges of color and light. It was also a strange thing to feel yourself physically change in such a short period while white light envelopes you as you cheer and dance with your best friend. She was longer a child, but her regular eighteen-year-old self, and she was sitting. The ground beneath her was cool, as was the light breeze. She tried squeezing her eyes tightly shut in an attempt to clear up the world around her.

There was... music? It's beat was in sync with the pulsing in her brain as the ache spread. When Max's eyes peered open, she was no longer in the Price living room, but sitting in front of Blackwell Academy. It was clearing, and she turned to see Hayden laying on his side beside her, peering up at Courtney, who was standing. Courtney high-fived someone, and Max recognized it as Logan's sleeve. Sitting with his back against a tree was Nathan Prescott, grinning and talking with Zachary. Taylor sat beside Zachary, giggling at something that was said. When Max peered to her right, she was started by Victoria's concerned face.

"Hello, are you even listening, Maxine?" Victoria asked, leaning forward to fully see Max's face. Max scooted back a bit, shocked by the use of her full name. She glanced around at the other students surrounding her, mouth parted in surprise.

"Max," she corrected. "Never Maxine."

"I know, sorry, Mad Max," Victoria replied. "You're not pissed at me right? Right?"

Max almost asked why it would matter if she was pissed or not, but kept her thoughts to herself. Since when did Victoria refer to her as Mad Max?

Victoria raised a brow. "Do you want to go hit the girls' potty and smoke some peace pipe?" she suggested. Max stared at her, unable to comprehend the request.

"I think Max is high..." Courtney smirked. The rest of the members, aside from Logan who was wandering around, stared at her.

"She's acting, like, so weird..." Taylor piped in. "You cool, Max?" Max blinked rapidly at Taylor, opening her mouth to speak before Courtney cut her off.

"Nobody listened to me when I said we shouldn't let her in the Vortex..." Courtney dramatically sighed, crossing her arms.

Taylor rolled her eyes. "Courtney, you don't want anyone in the club."

"Like, whatever bitch."

Max felt panic coursing through her, her stomach coiling. This wasn't right. She scooted back to get up. She wasn't a part of the Vortex club, and she didn't have out with Victoria, her minions, or Zachary, or...

As her eyes frantically searched around for something familiar, they caught a warm gaze that made her stop and stare. Nathan sat across from her in the circle, and he was now ignoring everything Zachary was saying. He cocked his head to the side slightly, grinning over a her in a way that brought goosebumps along the back of her neck. He raised a quizzically brow at her, as if asking what was wrong?

Something more was off about him, and it wasn't the fact that his prized jacket was no longer red, but blue. His hair was still slicked back, and the light of the setting sun was casting an orange glow across his pale skin. That glow only made his eyes stand out in color. He didn't stare at her like he did before. There was no clouded anger and no desire to be hidden by toxicity, only clear friendliness and absolute interest.

Max broke the contact, forcing herself to her feet. Victoria said something to her, but she ignored it. She could still feel Nathan's stare on her as she stood, looking over herself. These weren't her clothes. She stumbled away from the group, tuning out her name being called. She wasn't sure where she was going, but seeing Warren made her stop. A familiar face... that was holding hands with Stella. Max walked closer, hoping Warren's Max-senses would tingle and he'd call over to her, but no such luck. Warren's dark eyes - which were not bruised anymore - were focused on Stella.

What was this? The air was different, and Max wasn't processing it. All she did was save William's life, so how did she end up here? Why was she dressed in such expensive feeling attire, and why was Victoria genuinely smiling at her like she were her best friend? Why were the Vortex members so concerned about her? What was a peace pipe? Why wasn't Warren noticing her? Why was he with Stella, not Brooke? What about Kate? Was Kate alive here, too? Where was Chloe?

Max gasped. "Oh, God..." Gazing around at the campus, Max stilled. What else had she changed...?

"Max!" A voice called out to her, and she whirled around. Nathan was walking towards her, and her heart sank down to her stomach. He approached her in a way much different than she remembered. The Nathan Prescott she knew had walked into the bathroom with panic and obvious fear before shooting her best friend. The Nathan Prescott she knew had stormed up to her, got up in her face with threats about snitching on him, and had hurt Warren for no reason. The Nathan Prescott she knew was an asshole, dangerous, and entitled.

So, why the hell didn't this feel like the Nathan Prescott she knew?

"Hey, you look freaked," Nathan said, approaching her with brows lifted and worried curiosity swimming in is bleached indigo eyes.

"Uh..." Max struggled, unsure of what to actually say to Nathan. After all, they didn't exactly have the friendliest history. At least, Max assumed they didn't.

Nathan frowned, shoving his hands in the pockets of his heavy jacket. It was a bit disorienting to see him in blue instead of red. "You're not still worried are you?" he asked.

"Worried?" Actually, yes, she was worried. She was worried about what else she had altered, and God knows what else that could've happened.

"About your entry? Look," Nathan stepped closer, placing his hand on her shoulder. Max flinched at the touch, but Nathan didn't seem to notice. "Max, you have a better chance at winning the contest than even Victoria. So, stop thinking about it."

Entry? Contest? Wait, was he talking about the Everyday Hero Contest? Max didn't enter a photo. Well, back in her... What was she suppose to call it? Her universe? Timeline? Back in her timeline, she didn't enter a photo. She shredded it, and then Nathan shot someone. Well, not technically, but still.

"You're still thinking about it." Nathan sighed, a bit annoyed. "It was bad enough convincing you to hand it in. Am I gonna have to put up with you like this until tomorrow night?"

What photo did she enter? Her mind flashed to the photo she tore up in the bathroom, and wondered if that ever had a lifetime. Did any of the pictures she took exist?

Wait.

Max's eyes widened a bit, and she quickly dug around in her bag, pulling out her instant camera. It was her original camera, not William's. She sighed happily, glad that even in this strange place she hadn't switched over to digital. But, she was disappointed to see that there were no photos hanging around in her bag.

"Max?"

The instant camera was familiar, and it gave her the feeling of relief that she was searching for. Max placed the camera carefully back into her bag, readjusting her strap.

She needed to get out of here and go make sure Chloe was alright. She needed to go make sure William was alright. She needed to see them being a happy family again. The very thought of Chloe smiling with William made her giddy.

"Hey, you!" A finger jabbed at her forehead, breaking her of her thoughts. The finger continued to poke her until she swatted it away. She glared up at Nathan, who merely frowned down at her.

"What?" she snapped at him.

Nathan was a bit taken back, but recovered quickly. "You're not listening to me!"

Max let out a frustrated sigh. "I need to go! Right now!" She didn't have time to argue with Nathan, but before she could bolt away, Nathan snatched her arm. She tried pulling away, but he only tightened his grip.

"Hold on, I'm not done!" Nathan was clearly annoyed, but at that point Max didn't care. "What is with you today? You're freaking me out."

"I'm freaking you out?" Max almost laughed. What was his deal? Why was he even talking to her? Nathan hated her, so why was he bothering?

"Yeah, you are." Nathan jerked her back, not harshly, but enough for Max to stumble back right beside him. She thought about pushing him away with all her might and making a run for it, but even in her panicked mind she knew that wouldn't end well. Nathan's grip remained as he said, "Just listen, I'm going out to get party favors with Logan tonight, since he doesn't want to go alone, so I'm gonna be late."

"'Kay, whatever." Max didn't care what he was saying, she just wanted him to hurry so that she could go. She was antsy, and she was sure Nathan could tell. Nathan cocked his head to the side, just like he did earlier.

"So, I'll see you tonight?" His tone was a bit unsure, but Max didn't pick up on it.

"Yeah," She was becoming impatient now. Nathan studied her face for a moment before finally releasing her arm.

"Okay. Tonight." Max almost cried out with relief, but the feeling didn't last long.

It was quick, much quicker than she could get away. Before she could even move, Nathan's hand was caressing her neck. This was much different than back in the parking lot. She froze, gaping at him. This touch was light, not threatening. His thumb pressed against her cheek, and she could feel her heart harshly pounding in her chest. Before Max could fully understand - or even believe - what was happening, Nathan closed his eyes and leaned in, pressing his mouth against hers.

Heat washed over her, freckled skin flushing and eyes widening. Max's body figured out the situation before her brain could, and it reacted accordingly. She pushed Nathan away, their lips parting loudly and quickly. The next thing she knew, there was a loud crack and her hand was tingling painfully.

"Fuck!" Nathan cursed, holding his already reddening cheek. She gawked at him in disbelief as she slapped a hand over her mouth. Her lips were moist and throbbing as her blood rushed. The students around them were watching now, even Warren. Max glanced around at the surprised faces before turning back to Nathan, who was mumbling a sting of curses. Before he could say anything more to her, she ran.

Nathan had kissed her.

Nathan had fucking kissed her.

And she slapped him. Hard. Her hand was still lightly throbbing as she ran to the bus. It was getting ready to leave, and she picked up her pace to reach it in time. The doors opened, and Max stepped in. She was greeted by David Madsen as he nodded at her, hands firmly placed on the large steering wheel. A pang of guilt shot through Max, and she did her best to not stare at him. She kept her head down, and sat down.

Her lips were still warm and moist, and her heart was still thudding around in her chest to the point of aching. She just couldn't believe it - any of it! Not only had she altered time - or thoroughly fucked it up, she wasn't sure - but she was in the Vortex club, Victoria was treating her with kindness - and it was kind of creepy - Warren was with Stella - not even in another timeline did Brooke have a chance - and Nathan Prescott kissed her like it was nothing, like it was normal.

She could only imagine what Chloe would say.

"Oh, God..." Max mumbled. The bus came to a stop, and students all around were getting up, but they weren't getting off the bus. Max looked out her window to see a group of three beached whales, and she felt her throat tighten. Just when things couldn't get anymore fucked...

When Max got off the bus, she pushed all thoughts of beached whales, Vortex clubs, timelines, and Nathan Prescott out of her mind and focused on Chloe. The only thing that could fix this would be to see her best friend smile again.

Max eventually made it to the Price home, finding the house completely painted. With butterflies fluttering in her belly and her nerves on fire, she approached the door, knocking.

William answered, visibly surprised and happy. Max asked for Chloe, and William called for her.

Once again, though, the universe surprised her.

Chloe rolled up in her high tech wheelchair, and the moment her eyes met Max's, she smiled.

Max didn't stay too long. After all, she was still a student at Blackwell, and she still had to make curfew. Seeing Chloe in her wheelchair, and hearing about her accident only hurt Max even more, and she felt the guilt of putting Chloe in that chair. It was the universe's way of telling her to stop screwing with the order of things. It was her punishment.

Her and Chloe went to the beach for some fresh air, and it was nice to be out and about with Chloe without having to truly worry about being caught for something. Afterwards, they headed back to Chloe's room, and talked. They talked like no time had past, and it was about normal things. They didn't talk about time travel, or even Rachel Amber. Chloe didn't know Rachel in this timeline, and part of Max was heartbroken for that fact alone. She knew Chloe - her Chloe - had loved Rachel in more ways than one.

Max had to leave eventually, promising that she would be back after classes ended tomorrow, and that seemed to be enough for Chloe.

William offered to drive her back to Blackwell, and Max waved to Chloe as she hopped into the car.

They talked as they drove. William told her all the details of their trip to France, and Max could tell that he was glad to push aside all worried thoughts, even if it was for a short car ride. Max was afraid to bring up Chloe. She didn't want to upset William. After all, look at what she did to save him...

They reached Blackwell, and Max thanked him for the ride. She promised that she would be back tomorrow, and William merely smiled. He knew she was serious.

Max watched as William drove off, and she dragged her feet as she headed for the dorms.

The dorms were buzzing as the girls chatted and prepared to turn in, while other girls prepared to sneak out. Most of the girls said hello to her as she made her way to her room, and half of them she didn't even know. Luckily, her dorm was in the exact same spot. She noticed that there wasn't any police tape covering Kate's door, and she knew that her friend was okay. Kate's room still belonged to her according to the map on the wall, and Max thought that that might be the only decent thing in this universe.

When she entered her room, she was startled at how different everything looked. Her room was tidy, not a single thing out of place. Her walls were much more professionally designed, and her desk was arranged differently. Her clothes were completely different, and she never thought that she would miss her old jacket so much. Where did she get all these? How did she afford them? She didn't want to think about it.

She noticed something red draped over her chair, and she instantly recognized it as Nathan's jacket, the one that she knew him to wear. Her memory flashed to earlier, and her face became heated all over again. She had managed to forget that incident for a few hours, and she ignored the obvious issue in front of her as she made up an excuse for Nathan's jacket.

There was one thing that remained the same: The Max Caulfield Memorial Wall.

Except, that was different now, too.

The photo's were no longer selfies; they were pictures of her and Nathan, with some Victoria and other Vortex members thrown in there. Upon the realization, Max hopped on the bed, plucking pictures off the wall to get a closer look.

The first one she grabbed was of her and Nathan, his arm around her shoulders and hers wrapped around his waist. The two of them were smiling widely, and from what Max could see, the two of them were outside Blackwell. The next photo was similar to the first, only this time they were making funny faces. The third was of her and Victoria making duck faces, which made Max cringe a bit.

Max frantically pulled the pictures off the walls, seeing unfamiliar photo after photo until she pulled one down of her and Nathan in a tight lip lock. Max focused on the photo, studying their pleased expressions to the point where the picture began to pulse, and Nathan's voice echoed in her head. She instantly tore her gaze from the photo, dropping it in the pile. She sure as hell didn't want to go back in time through any photos, not after the mess she had already made.

It was a normal thing, wasn't it? For him to kiss her like that? These pictures proved it, and Max couldn't make any excuses. Nathan Prescott wasn't her enemy, and he wasn't just her friend. She could only imagine how confused and pissed off he was after she left him like that. She should have picked up on the meanings behind his words, but she had been to focused on Chloe. Then again, Max was known to be oblivious when it came to things like that.

"Holy shit." Max said aloud to herself. She sat on her bed next to the pile of photos, her face buried in her hands. How could any of this be real? How could things of changed so much? All she did was save William's life so that Chloe would be happy, and now everything was a mess.

There was a knock at her door, and Max hesitated to open it. She remembered Nathan mentioning something about seeing her tonight, but she didn't know in what context.

"Max?" Victoria's voice called behind the door. Max thought about ignoring her, pretending she wasn't there, but decided against it. She didn't need Victoria pissed at her. Max got off her bed and opened the door, and Victoria pushed her way in.

"Max, is your phone dead? I've sent you, like, a million texts. I even called you." Victoria's accusatory tone almost made Max roll her eyes. Max shut the door, facing her apparent new best friend.

"Sorry," was all she could think of to say.

"Alright, tell me what's going on." Victoria noticed the photos on Max's bed. "What did he do?" Victoria reached out and grabbed one of the selfies her and Nathan took, patiently waiting for an answer.

"Uh..."

"Because he's freaking out. I can't believe you hit him." Victoria set the photo down. "It must have been really, really bad."

Max didn't know how to answer. First of all, she wasn't even entirely sure - what was she talking about? She was pretty damn sure - what Nathan was to her. Second, he had kissed her and that's why she hit him, but using that reason would only bring up more questions. Third, Max was having a hard time dealing with everything that had already happened, and she wanted nothing more than to brush off the subject of Nathan.

"I, uh..."

Victoria, with a concerned look in her eye, approached Max, staring down at her. "Max, if Nathan did something stupid, you can tell me. It wouldn't be the first time. He's just..." Victoria trailed off, crossing her arms and thinking. "...He didn't, like, cheat on you or anything, right? Because if that-"

"No, Victoria. Look," Max cut her off. "I'm really tired, and I would like to turn in early."

"Then, what's the problem?" Victoria ignored what she was saying, and Max just wanted to shove her out of her room. "Max, what happened?"

She has time rewind powers, and she thought it was a great idea to fix the flow of the universe by preventing William Price from getting in a fatal car accident, only to find her real best friend in a wheelchair, her new best friend to be Victoria Chase, Warren dating Stella, David driving a bus, beached whales, and that she was dating Nathan Prescott. That's what happened. She actually thought about screaming her thoughts out loud, and then rewinding, but she had become scared of her power. It would be her luck if she accidentally froze time and wasn't unable to unfreeze it, or if she rewound so far back that her brain blew up.

"I..." Max rubbed at her eyes. "I don't know."

Victoria's hands were placed lightly on her shoulders, and she was bending down slightly to meet Max's eye. "Max, listen to me. I'm saying this as Nathan's best friend, and yours; don't hurt him. He gets enough of that shit at home, and he doesn't need it from you. You are one of the few good things he has going for him right now. He's already got to deal with his father cutting him off, and you and I are the only ones who care about what he's going through. I know he can be a bit too much to handle sometimes, but..." Victoria's stern face grew soft. "...He doesn't mean it. You have to know that."

Max was stunned by her words. Wait, his father cut him off? That wasn't right. What could have possibly changed that? Nathan practically depended on his father, always using him as a threat. At least, back in her timeline, he did. And did she really matter to him that much? The way Victoria said it made it seem like she was the only good thing, and that very thought terrified Max. She glanced over at the photos piled on her bed, and realized how happy Nathan looked in each one.

"Okay, Victoria. I get it." Max stared down at her feet. "Can you please go now? I'm tired." Max tried to make her tone as soft and convincing as she could, but she needed to be alone. She needed to think, and she needed time to grasp what was happening. She needed to learn more about what she was to Nathan, and she had a feeling that the journal she kept under her pillow - hopefully she still kept it there - was the key.

Victoria's hands fell from Max's shoulders, and she studied Max's face. "Fine. If you need anything, text me. Or knock, I'm right across the hall." she said, passing Max to the door.

"Yeah." Max nodded.

"Goodnight, Max."

"Goodnight, Victoria."

The door shut with a soft click, and Max was alone again. She went straight for her pillow, succeeding in finding her journal. She only hoped that it contained the answers she needed. Pushing the photos aside, Max crawled onto her bed and searched through the entries. Luckily, in the timeline she wrote daily, as well. She skimmed most of the pages, searching for Nathan's name. She eventually found an entry about meeting Nathan. She focused on her writing, carefully reading each word.

What she didn't expect was for the page to pulse and to hear voices, just like with the photos. She tore her gaze from the page, rubbing at her eyes. She didn't want to go back in time and possibly screw up things even more, but she had to read what it said. How else was she suppose to figure this shit out?

So, she started reading again. It was just her talking about how he seemed distant, barely acknowledging her until Victoria introduced her. They had gone with a few of the other Vortex members to the Two Whales. They rode in Nathan's SUV, and Max described Nathan as sarcastic and a bit rude, but seemed like a fun guy.

Max could barely believe the words to be written by her hand. Then again, this Max didn't first 'meet' Nathan in the girls' bathroom.

The entry wasn't detailed, and neither were many of the other entries. Most days were the same; loads of homework, argued with Nathan about this, Victoria did this, life is crazy, goodnight. Becoming frustrated, she slammed the journal shut and tossed it across the room. Why didn't this Max keep detailed entries like the other Max? Thing's couldn't be any more hectic than her old universe.

Seeing that the journal wasn't any help, Max searched through her drawers. All she found was fancy - dare she even say sexy? - panties and matching bras, which caused her to blush as though they belonged to someone else. Max didn't wear risky lace, she wore comfortable cotton. She did find another photo of Nathan by himself, posing on top of some old beat up car that she recognized from the junkyard. Other than that one picture, there was just lots of socks and pajamas.

Digging through desk drawers, all she found were books, film, some random notes, and odds and ends.

Her laptop did officially confirm her relationship with Nathan via Facebook. Nothing confirms love like Facebook. Max read through her emails, but they were mostly from Victoria and Taylor, and none from Nathan.

Max sprinted to her closet, digging around through her clothes and the rest of her drawers. But, it wasn't until she searched the top shelf of her closet that she actually found something. It was a shoebox, light as she pulled it down. Tossing the lid aside, she found a bunch of notes, movie tickets, and pictures, all relating to her and Nathan. Bingo.

Bringing it back to her desk, Max dug through some of the pictures. They were all intimate selfies with Nathan, most of which they were kissing. Little notes and dates were written on the back of each of them. One in particular caught her eye. They were at a beach, in their swimsuits. Max was smiling widely as Nathan kissed her cheek. Max reminded herself not to stare at the photo for too long.

Max pulled out one of the folded letters, each dated differently, and was greeted by Nathan's sloppy handwriting.

Max

Meet at pool. We need to talk. Don't you dare bring Vic.

Nathan

One after one, she continued to read.

Maxi Taxi

Sorry I had to leave early. Dad called. Shit is to ensue. Wanted to wake you but you looked like a zombie. A cute zombie but I didnt want you to bite me again. I'll come over tonite. Wear the red ones.

love Nathan

I have fallen from her grace

she chained my heart to hers

opened my eyes

and darkness no longer existed

Maximum Ride

I got a surprise for you. Two Whales at 5.

love Nathan

Freckles

Cant stop thinking about this morning. You are becoming an issue yknow. Im not complaining much tho. Sometimes I wish we didnt have to attend this shitty school or that you didnt care so much about your damn homework. I always miss you. Im starting to think that you might be the only thing distracting me from this shit dad is doing. Somethings not right Max. If you happen to see him at any games or around school pls dont talk to him. Dont even look at him even if Im there. Im begging you. See you tonite.

love Nathan

Sun Kiss

I dont think you realize how damn good you look in my jacket. But you look better without it. Too cheesy? For real how do you expect me to keep my hands to myself? Such a tease. Bring my jacket back to my room tonite. You promised youd pose.

love Nathan

Do you have any idea what you do to me?

Max

Im an asshole. Im so sorry about last night. I dont know what happened. Shit has been happening lately since my father called and I dont know what to do. Talking to you did help but I kinda fucked that one up didnt I? Im going to keep my door unlocked tonight. Im gonna make it up to you.

love Nathan

Her door swung open, causing her to squeak in surprise and spin around. Her cheeks were flushed, and her heart was pounding harshly. Scattered words spoke loudly in her mind, and she couldn't believe that they were put there by Nathan's hand.

Nathan stepped in, shutting the door softly. He avoided his gaze, and Max instantly noticed how pale he was. Luckily, his cheek was no longer red. Nathan straightened out his blue jacket, sighing.

"So, you gonna tell me what the fuck that was about?" he spat out, but with no real bite. He went to her bed to sit, but stopped when he saw all the photos. He picked one up of them posing together, and Max could see the corner of his lips twitch up and his eyes soften.

"I'm sorry." Max blurted out.

Her voice broke him of his trance on the photo, and he sat on the bed. Max remained where she was, standing by her desk uncomfortably. The sight of Nathan sitting on her bed still rose red flags in her mind. Nathan glanced up at her for a second before focusing on his shoes, and rubbed at his cheek.

"Can't believe you actually hit me..." he mumbled.

"I didn't mean to..." Max lied. She had meant to, but that didn't mean that she didn't feel bad about it.

"Then why'd you do it?" Nathan set the photo in his hands aside, waiting. When she didn't answer, Nathan said, "You're not still pissed about the party, are you?"

"Party?" What party?

"Yeah, I thought you got over that. So, why're you still pissed?"

"No..." Max shook her head, eying the notes she held in her hand. She set them back in the box. "Not the party..."

"'Kay, so then what?"

Max bit her lip. She had so many questions for him, but how was she suppose to go about this? "Nathan, are you... close to your father?" Yeah, no, let's just start with that, Max. As soon as the words left her mouth, she wanted to rewind. But, she also wanted to know his answer.

Nathan's head snapped up, and he stared at her with narrowed eyes. "What the fuck are you asking me that for?" He was obviously offended.

"I just..." She had to try and dig out of this, because she was still afraid to use her powers. "...Why did he cut you off?"

"Max, what-"

"Just indulge me for a minute, Nathan." Max cut him off.

Nathan sighed, running his fingers through his hair, irritated and obviously upset. "Asshole cut me off because I'm a failure! Something about a side family business that he didn't want me fucking up. I know I told you that! Now, what the fuck is wrong with you?" Nathan was on his feet, stepping towards her. Max instinctively backed up, bumping into her desk as cold fear washed over her. "Wha-" Nathan noticed her expression, and stopped immediately.

Max waited, staring up at him with wide eyes. Nathan grimaced, muttering, "Why are you looking at me like that...?" He rose his hand up to touch her face, and she flinched away. Nathan's hand froze, almost touching her skin. His expression showed hurt, and it was bewildering to see such torment on Nathan's face. All she knew was his anger. "I'm... I'm not gonna hurt you. Why..." Nathan swallowed harshly. "...why are you looking at me like I'm...?" He didn't finish his sentence.

Max shook her head, keeping herself focused on him. Her hand twitched to rewind, but she didn't.

"Nathan, what am I to you?" Max whispered the question, forcing herself to keep her gaze locked with his. She searched for any signs of hatred, but found none. All she found was confusion, desperation, and a sadness that swirled together within the hues of his stare.

"U-uh-" It was Nathan's turn to stumble on his words. He turned away from her, and Max could see that he was twitching slightly. "Shit, Max, you... you know."

"No, I don't know-"

"Where is this coming from?" He was becoming defensive. "Fuck, I thought we were better than this I'm-pissed-at-you-and-I'm-going-to-make-you-figure-out-why bullshit! Just fucking tell me what I did!"

"Stop yelling at me, Nathan!" Max exclaimed.

"What do you expect? I have been trying so damn hard, Max! But obviously that doesn't seem to be enough for you!"

Max had no clue what he was talking about. Those letters and photos only told her so much. All she knew was that she was getting more and more upset with him. "That's not what this is about!"

Nathan glared at her. "Then, what's your problem?"

"You, Nathan! You're my problem!" Max reached over and grabbed one of the pillows off foot of her bed, angrily throwing it at him. "I don't know what the fuck is going on and you aren't helping! I just found out that my best friend since childhood is in a goddamn wheelchair because I made a huge, shitty mistake, and I don't even know how to handle that! And then you! You just..." Max covered her face with her hands.

"Wheelchair? Who-" Nathan seemed genuinely confused, and startled by her outburst. The pressure of her words sunk in to him, and Max could see the confusion fade and become replaced by guilty sorrow. "Max?"

Max was crying, and she turned her back to him. She wiped at her eyes, cursing herself for allowing tears to fall in front of Nathan, of all people. Her chest was becoming heavier and heavier, her mind swirling and becoming overwhelmed with emotions she never knew she could feel. Just the sight of Chloe bound to her chair had crushed her, and now with everything else pressing in on her she felt like she was going to burst into nothingness. Through blurred vision, she stared down at the shoe box containing memories she never had.

A hand ran across the back of her shoulder. "H-hey," Max could detect the slight panic in Nathan's soft voice as he cautiously stood behind her. He turned her around, and she avoided his eyes. "I didn't know, okay? I'm sorry, I just..." Nathan rested both hands on her shoulders now. "...didn't know."

Max inhaled deeply, rubbing her wet cheeks with the back of her hand and shaking her head. "No, it's okay. Just..." she choked out. His touch was incredibly warm through her clothing as he moved his hands down her arms, and she allowed him to turn her around. He carefully pulled her to his chest, and even if she should have been repulsed, she wrapped her arms around his waist. Nathan was dangerous, scary, and he did terrible things, and yet here she was, allowing him to hold her in such an intimate way.

Those letters weren't threatening, and they made her nervous in a completely different way. Those photos were real, and so were they. She couldn't wrap her head around it. How could they be real here when back in her timeline they were nothing. Nothing but distant hatred.

"Everywhere I go, I hurt people," Nathan mumbled against her hair. "I'm sorry..." Nathan pulled back from her, and in one movement, he captured her lips with his. She didn't pull back, ignoring her brain's protests. This time, her body leaned into him, and she pressed back. They parted, and Nathan breathed out, "I let you down, Max... but, you have to know that... that..." He squeezed his eyes shut, his hands sliding up to cup her face as he rested his forehead against hers. Max darted her gaze over him.

Was this really the Nathan she knew?

His breath hit her already warm mouth, and her eyes drooped shut. No, she wasn't thinking straight, and that was why she pressed her mouth against his in a tight lip lock. He eagerly returned the kiss, moving his mouth against hers in such a desperate way. His mouth was sweet, and pleasurable tingles shot through her cheeks down to her stomach. Her grip on his jacket tightened when they parted, and she tasted the bitter sorrow that lingered in the moisture of her lip.

Her heart hurt, and nothing made sense. He sucked her lip in between his teeth, tugging her back to him. She couldn't breathe properly, panting against his mouth. They parted once more, and he held her once more, pressing his mouth against her shoulder. She felt him tense up, before pulling back again.

"You... you kept those?" he asked softly. Max twisted around to follow his sight to the shoe box containing the letters and photos. Max could only nod, mind still cloudy and light.

This time, he was much rougher, grabbing her and kissing her harshly. Her tongue tasted his bittersweet lip, and he sucked every last bit of her breath from her lungs. Any worries about this alternate timeline was washed away from her mind as Nathan tugged at her brown locks. She was pressed against her desk, and any sense of what was right and what was wrong vanished. All she focused on his desperation, his sorrow, and his need for her. Any fear of going back to normal gone. Any memories of a red jacket gone. Raging eyes gone. Threats gone.

Max no longer thought, only reacted to his touch and his mouth as he forced them closer together, shoving against the desk and knocking over the shoe box, all contents sliding out with one of Nathan's letters landing on top.

You have to know what you are to me... even if I don't always act like it.

bit·ter·sweet
/ˈbidərˌswēt/

adjective

1. Sweet with a bitter aftertaste.

2. Arousing pleasure tinged with sadness or pain

3. Nathan Prescott's lips.