The smell of a fire drifted into his nose and vaguely Ralph felt that curtain of fog dizzy him momentarily. He felt the distant hunger he had grown accustomed soon to rumble like thunder on the horizon nearby. He wondered about the littleuns as they are to be wondered about; their location, their safety, their doings. He wondered about the older ones, too, and where they were and what they were up to. He wondered about food that night and food tomorrow and the shelters and the definite swing from spring into summer; the days growing warmer yet and surely they had been there two seasons, now? And then he wondered about her.
It seemed strange to think about her as different, but she was. She was human like them and then there was the matter of everything else. There it was. He could pretend all he liked that she was separate but equal and she would never be. It would always be them and her.
He wondered at this and thought about this and then pushed it away. It was too much to think about with so much already on his mind.
"Let's not go complicating things any more than they already are," his mind said in much the same manner as his father or his teacher. "One musn't in this situation."
Just then he heard a cluster of littleuns further down the beach yelling, "Hooray!" into the dimming sundown light—most likely the hunters had brought meat. And Ralph only heard that collective cry as, "Too late!"
He came down to where they were all gathered around the pits and eating, gnawing, juice of the meat dribbling down the array of chins and mouths and fingers. Ralph stood uncertainly before them, not helping serve or taking meat, trying to shake the fog out of his mind. What was this? Forgetting the past? Or forgetting the future?
Jack ripped a sizeable slab from the pig and offered it to him. Ralph accepted but did not even begin eating as normal, instead only slightly noticing the weight of the steaming meat in his hands.
Instead he watched as Jack came around the pig again, easily hacking off a piece with motions he had grown accustomed to, and looked around the gathering. He looked about himself once more before saying to no one in particular, "Where is she?"
Samneric looked up. "Who she?" said the former and all listening gave him a flat stare. "Was a joke," Eric mumbled halfheartedly. "Only one she."
"There," Roger said, and pointed down the beach.
Heads turned and there she was, a shadowy figure coming towards them, walking to where the waves were just able to roll up the beach to lick her feet. Ralph went to do something with his hands—flick the irritating hair from his eyes, rub his neck, put his hand in the nonexistent pocket—and nearly dropped his meat. He deemed it best to eat then before he did anything else silly.
He took a bite and burned his tongue as she crossed beside him and she saw and smirked a little. Wondering if it was friendly or mocking he watched as Jack ceremoniously handed her the meat and said, "Alright?"
She smiled and the firelight illuminated all her teeth, the curve of her cheeks in a smile. "Alright," she said without further comment, and looked for a place to sit down.
Grouped in a messy circle around the fire, the littleuns took up one half entirely, chattering and talking and laughing at the sort of things boys of their age chattered and talked and laughed about. Around the other half, however, Piggy and Simon and Ralph and Samneric sat next to Maurice and Roger. Jack sat down, having done his job of dispensing the meat.
The older boys talked and pretended not to notice her deciding where to sit.
After some seconds of deliberation she sat where she stood, close to the fire, a solitary person within the ring.
Ralph watched her begin eating and then glanced at the boys beside him for no reason he could think of. Jack seemed to look over at him in that moment too, almost darkly curious. Ralph stiffened a little at the hardness in Jack's expression and then the moment was gone and the latter smiled at him and raised the meat in solidarity.
"Good, then?" He asked, and Ralph nodded.
They continued eating as always and as they sat around the fire afterwards, Ralph couldn't help but notice Jack's eyes trained on her back, silently watching like the eyes of the forest creatures at night. His silent vigil of her went undetected by everyone except Ralph.
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