Hello! I see you stumbled on this fic probably just out of curiosity. I hope you enjoy Hello! I see you stumbled on this fic probably just out of curiosity. I hope you enjoy it. This is an Modern AU but the races: Sheikah, Hylians, Zoras etc do still exist. So It's kinda like a 21st century hyrule. I'll explain more at the end of the chapter Warning: rated T for language
That's all you're going to tip me. Really.
Impa thought to herself as she forced a smile. Another shitty day in this shitty restaurant, where people can't seem to give a decent tip.
"The Bazaar" was a dirty dark restaurant downtown, with pleasant customers who are usually druggies or alcoholics. It attracts gross perverts who just came back by wasting their last dough on the strip club next door where they get the only action they ever gotten in their lives. Those guys are the worst, they think they're the goddamn king of the world because some stripper gave them a squeezer. More importantly their terrible tippers.
The owner of the restaurant is a weird raggedy ginger named Yuga, who doesn't really care what you do as long as you serve customers and make money. Impa suspects he's a sorcerer that participates in illegal magic duels but you never know. Magic does seem to be the only explanation on how this cracked wall restaurant is staying together.
Oh God. Is that poo!?
Impa scrunch her nose and nearly gagged when her eyes landed on brown pellets. Gross. Furiously shaking her head in disgust the sheikah turn her heels and ignored it as if not looking it it will make it go away. She shrugged to herself Sometimes it works.
Giggling girls distracted Impa from her poo thoughts, she whirled around and spotted a usual sight. Link, a handsome, kind hylian taking orders and being charming, flashing his best smile. His electric blue eyes capturing the girls he's serving. Impa laughed under her breath those girls are so clueless.
Despite having a heart of gold he's bit of a womanizer. Each week he seems to have a new girl visiting him during work. They come in, snog him, give everyone else a dirty look and leave. It's not his fault, he's every girl's dream: attractive, brave, pleasurable. Poor Link just can't keep up with all this attention and isn't very committed to relationships or... anything. Let's just say He's not the sharpest tool in the shed. In spite of what every girl thinks he's not mister perfect and it took Impa months to crack Link's perfect exterior,but it still feels like her friend is hiding stuff from her. She's knows something awful happened in his past but she soon gave up trying to figure out what it was.
Some secrets aren't meant to be shared and no one understands privacy more than her. Yet she can never crack how he can look content despite the circumstance he's living under. Everyday he shows up with that naive little smile of his, tolling into work like everything is actually going well, she knows the financial problems he's under. Hell, if Link ever told her that he loved this restaurant she probably would've believed him if it wasn't for those bags under his eyes. Not that Impa can say much about that, she has an identical pair on her tanned face. That's one of the many differences the two friends share, Link will smile and charm you. He loves to pull strangers close and make them laugh. He surrounds himself with people as if hanging out with them can pay his debts, Impa on the other hand never let's herself get close to anyone. Even friends she keeps away at an arm's length, just to be sure. Everyone will let you down eventually, that's how she saw it, and it was better to be alone.
Heading to the kitchen she saw another unsurprising view.
The hostess, a 16-year old girl named Marin, was seducing a freaky looking man. The sight alone gave her mouth a bad taste. She's only sixteen. But Impa didn't try to stop her, if that's how they get their customers then that's how they get their customers. Impa didn't know much about the girl except that she's beautiful with her soft features. Her heart shaped face and dimples drives guys wild. Marin was naive and playful, the rest of her Impa didn't care girl could disappear and Impa wouldn't even notice.
Everyday she dreamt of leaving. Walking out and never coming back. Her dreams filled with money and prosperity. Impa laughed dryly to herself. That's nice thought but it's never gonna happen. No matter how much she hates it she needs this damn job.
Impa nearly cries of joy when the old tiny clock in the rec room strikes 12:00 am. Her shift is finally fucking over. Have I mention the shitty hours?
Darunia, a fellow waiter in the dumps, threw his giant hands in the air "AH YES! Freedom!" Impa snickered and joined him "They open the gates! We can leave!" The pair have been chilling in the rec room just talking when the gates to freedom opened. The restaurant was almost empty so it didn't hurt if they were hiding in the back room.
Impa and Darunia have developed an interesting friendship. Where the Goron is loud and talkative, the Sheikah is quiet and keeps to herself. Impa used to think of him as a obnoxious heap of rocks but the friendly goron sooned made his way to her good side. Darunia was from Death city, a huge dry Goron populated city in the west. Impa didn't really know what he was doing here let alone why he would come to Hyrule City.
"I swear one more hour in here I would have drown myself in that pile of poop near the bathrooms" The white-haired sheikah joked.
"Oh yeah who's cleaning that up? Cause I'm starting to smell it IN HERE!" Impa cringed and covered her 's nothing better than a hyper rock belching in your ears. He gazed at her with pleading violet eyes. Impa scowled and fought the urge to roll her eyes."You know you can do it" Her friend was a lazy bastard.
Darunia let out a hearty laugh, amused to the sheikah's statement "That's a funny joke, but I think Fi got it" Impa whirled around to see Fi, a beautiful blue metallic spirit with pointy cream blue hair and pupiless eyes. Even though Impa knows she means well, those cold calculating eyes seem to bore into her skull everytime she speaks to her. The spirit has a knack for reading people, she can unravel you like string and beat you senseless with her steel-like strength. Impa recalled the memory of the blue young woman getting into a fist fight just behind a restaurant with a customer who pinched her ass. His face was swollen and purple, not that she pitied him. That guy was a prick.
Impa sighed feeling sympathy for the spirit, it's not fair that she's always stuck with cleaning duty because she the only one who doesn't bitch about it. Fi never seemed to bothered by all the messes she needs to clean up, but Impa swears she once caught Fi out of the corner of her eye downing a flask of vodka hidden under her blue and purple poncho.
As the pair exited the building Impa heard the heated voices of two of her coworkers, Link and Ghirahim. Impa glance at the two waiters. Link always seems to lose his friendly composer when he was with narcissistic demon never seemed to have any trouble making Link mad, which was ridiculously hard to do. So there must be something wrong with you if you can make the happiest of men angry. The blonde's face was red and his hands were up making gestures as if he's trying to grasp the looked exasperated, as if Link was a mere child annoying angry voices rang across the room. Impa rolled her eyes, annoyed with their behavior not even bothering listening. It's probably about something stupid.
those two are acting like children
Impa immediately scrambled for tylenol the second she stepped into her cramped apartment. A damn headache has been bothering her all day.
ba-dum
She scurried to the bathroom, duly noting the fact that her roommate, Lana wasn't here. That girl usually always stays late, hustling extra hard to get money thrown at her as she pole dances in her skimpy white thongs. The one day I do laundry...
ba-dum
The sheikah forcefully yanked the cabinet door open, and seized the tylenol.
ba-dum ba-dum
Headache worsening Impa mentally told pollen it could go fuck it itself.
ba-dum ba-dum ba-dum ba-dum ba-dum
She threw two pills into her mouth and swallowed them. Her temple replenishes as the pills fell down her throat. Impa let out a dramatic sigh and rub her temples. Oh where would I be If it wasn't for tylenol!
Her head dispute rendered her even more tired, Impa collapse onto the bed. Unfortunately the second her body hit the bed the shitty mattresses springs broke.
"Girl, you look so hot!"
Zelda twirled in her red dress. "You think?"
After a long day at work, the two models indulged themselves with a shopping spree. One of the unlimited perks of having a hustle free life : limitless cash.
Zelda never had a struggle in her life, with her dad being mayor and heir to all her grandfather's real estate money, the beautiful hylians family was loaded.
Her alluring features always seem to make people throw themselves on a puddle so Zelda can step on their backs. Of course Zelda would never do that but it's not like she can stop it.
Zelda and Ruto are both models for Vogue. However for Zelda modeling is just a summer job, her true passion is politics. Working with her father, striving to make a Hyrule City a better place to live. She wanted to take a summer internship instead of posing at a camera and scowling for 10 minutes straight. However her father has other plans for her. He doesn't want her to follow him in the road to politics because "their are dishonorable people in politics who he doesn't want her to meet". Which naturally is total bullshit.
Her father got her the modeling job hoping to distract her from trying to sneak into a City Council meeting. Despite how ridiculous the situation is, Zelda humored him and took the job. She knows he's still grieving for her mother after all these years and for some reason it gives him a sense of purpose to shield her. As if that's how Mom would have wanted it. No matter how much Zelda was annoyed by it, if taking this job made her father feel better, then so be it.
Plus unlike a internship, you get paid.
"Should I get this skirt?" Ruto ask, showing off a tiny cobalt blue mini-skirt not covering all of her butt. Zelda eyes widened but she wasn't surprised. Her friend has always had an... exposing fashion style.
"No, the color is not in season. It will look tacky this time of year" saving her friend from even more exposing clothes than she already has.
"You're so right! Oh Zelda where would I be without you?!" Ruto gushes.
I have no clue
As the two friends started to the cashier Ruto coyly sneaked a interesting topic into their conversation.
"Yeah, you wouldn't have this problem if you went out a little more."
Zelda narrowed her bright blue eyes "I don't want to go clubbing with you, Ruto"
Ruto put her hands up defensively "Sorry, sorry you don't want to have fun."
Zelda stopped and looked at her friend with a frown. Ruto was wearing a tiny grin as if she could change Zelda's mind. "For the record, I don't like clubs. They are loud, sweaty and gross. They're always playing songs that sound exactly the same. AND in every club, EVERY club their always an annoying pervert who tries to hook up with you."
It was Ruto's turn to be annoyed. The attractive Zora rolled her eyes "Stop complaining about how hot you are"
"I wasn't-"
"C'mon Zels! You'll love it. Trust me now, I know this hot club that we can totally get in if you show your boob a little."
Zelda gave her a skeptical look.
"C'mon please!" The blond sighed giving in. It has been a while and it couldn't be that bad.
"Fine. But don't leave me alone!"
Ruto squealed and hugged her friend tightly, delighted that she finally wanted to come with her.
"This is going to be awesome!"
It was not awesome.
The club was just as gross as Zelda thought it would be. The blonde shoved her through the thick sweaty crowd to find her friend. The blaring music was not helping, and neither did the fact that everyone was drunk off their ass. What the hell was in the drinks tonight?!
Zelda forced herself to ignore the grinding couples and looked straight ahead. As she marched on, she unfortunately caught a whiff of some women's perfume and oh my god it smelled awful! Zelda gagged and pushed on a little harder.
Relief filled her bones when she spotted Ruto but it quickly dissipated when she realize the flirty Zora was talking to two men.
"Zels! I was looking all over for you!" Ruto slurred, she swayed with every word as if she was in a storm.
yeah right
"I met these awesome guys while I was trying to find you." Zelda rolled her eyes, not buying it. "Strich and Groose." The zora kept going, too drunk to notice her friends disbelief. Strich nodded but was too busy eyeing Ruto's breast to say anything else. However Groose was a different story. The redhead smiled widely and stepped closer, a little too close for Zelda's taste.
"Pleasure to meet you." He purred. The burly hylian drunkenly stroked her arm. Zelda retracted her arm and nervously smiled. Her mind scrambled for ways to get out of this.
"Well I'd loved to hang around but I forgot to feed my um...my bird"
Really your bird?! What is wrong with you.
"Nononono!" Ruto swung her arm around Zelda's shoulders and push her closer to the group." You are not leaving until we go on a double dateeee!" Zelda's protest were muffled by the drunken cheers.
" I know a place." Groose said not taking his yellow eyes off her.
Ok so that was the first chapter, Hope you enjoy it!
Zelda and Impa will be meeting in the next one so stayed tuned!
Hyrule City- A gleaming metropolis, with it's glowing streets and dirty slums. Basically New York, or Gotham. Mostly Hylian populated.
Zoras, Gorons ,weirds spirit things ,Demons, Sheikahs, Gerudos, Twilis, Fairies,Hylians- The races.