LOL so I was being a nerd and watching this cosplay video on youtube- and in the video Light has a nightmare... and it's pretty hilarious. SO it gave me an idea for this- bwahaha!

Warning: strange muttering, suggestiveness with chop sticks O.o, and excessive tickling. NO SLASH. although a mind could probably twist this into slash if they wanted to... but from the view of the author, it is completely and totally innocent! I no write slash.

Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note, Spongebob, cheese cake, or a baby raccon :( oh well.

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~Nightmares~

Beware the tickling raccoon man

L sat on the bed with his laptop in front of him. Kira would not wait while he slept, and he didn't need it anyways, so he often worked late. Where as the teenager he was chained to always got sleepy after midnight. So a lot of L's work was done late at night on his laptop while Light slept next to him.

It was 2:45 in the morning. L was just about ready to close up for the night and get some rest when something interesting started happening. Light was talking in his sleep again. He didn't do it often, but it was amusing when he did. L stopped to listen to the slumbering teen's nonsense.

"Mmm... no, get away from me..." Light mumbled. "... I don't want to watch Spongebob Matsuda... go bother some body else..." L was quickly losing interest.

"...No!" Light suddenly said loudly. "...no! no! stop it! I'm not Kira!" Light yelled in his sleep. He was now thrashing around, rolling and flailing his arms. "...I'm not Kira! you crazy raccoon man... I don't even like cheese cake..." Light protested, starting to calm down a bit.

"Raccon man?" L said to himself quietly.

"... I'm sorry mommy..." Light muttered. "...I didn't mean to do it... no, please... mommy, I love you..." L snickered to himself, knowing that awake Light would never say anything like this. He wished silently that he could see Light's dream, like a movie.

"... Misa you whore..." Light muttered. "...I'm not going to sleep with you... No! misa, I told you I'm a virgin..."

Oh how L wished for a video camera at the moment.

"No! Don't put your chop sticks there...!" Light shouted in his sleep. "...what is wrong with you?" L's eyes grew some what wider than normal. Who was putting a chop stick where exactly?

"... I'm sorry..." Light muttered again. L took this into consideration. Guilty conscious much? Maybe guilt from killing thousands of people, perhaps?

"... no, please don't flick me... no! not the raccoons again! Noo!" Light went back to tossing and turning and flailing madly. L watched him, humored, and wondered whether or not he should wake his friend from the odd night mare.

"... no, Mommy save me!" Light muttered. As he flailed around he sent out a punch that narrowly missed L's head. He quickly grabbed the boy's arm, as well as the other one, and pinned it above Light's head with one hand.

With the other hand, he began tickling Light unmercifully. Light woke up, giggling hysterically and shrieking.

"Light-kun, are you Kira?" L asked, knowing Light would be expecting the question. He didn't stop tickling as he did so.

"NO!" Light shrieked through uncontrollable laughter.

"Why do you have a fear of raccoons?" L asked, just plain curious.

"HAHAHA-What the-haha- hell are you talking-hahahaha- about! Ryuuzaki! Haha Stop it!" Light shrieked, struggling to get away from the crazy detective who was tickling him.

L finally stopped tickling and released Light's hands. He sat back on his heals, staring at Light. Faster than lightning the younger man punched him across the face. He fell backwards off the bed. The chain pulled and Light was sent sprawling belly first across the bed, head over the side where L had fallen off.

L kicked Light in the face, muttering "an eye for an eye." Light sat back, holding his newly black eye in one hand.

"Light-kun was having a nightmare," L stated, climbing back onto the bed and rubbing his sore jaw, where Light had struck him. "A very loud one, actually. You were begging for help, so-"

"so you started tickling me!" Light asked angrily.

"There are harsher ways to wake a person," L said boredly.

"You're so weird, Ryuuzaki. Let's just go back to bed," Light said, rolling his eyes and being a little moody about being woken up so suddenly.

"Light-kun is still a virgin?" L asked, refering to what Light had said in his dream. He meant the question in the most innocent way.

"What! That is not a normal thing to ask a person!" Light said angrily.

"And what exactly was Misa doing with that chop stick?" L asked, complete curiosity taking over.

"You don't want to know," Light said, disturbed humor in his voice as he rolled over onto his side to go to bed. L was no longer certain he wanted to know, and lay down to sleep as well. L had a dream about gummy bears.

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Oh the shit that oozes out of my brain. like I said before, I wrote this to be completely innocent, take it as you will. Well, I'm off to bed now since I have testing in the morning and am going for my third degree black belt! wooot! so yea, sleep time.

say goodnight guys-

L: Good night :3

R/R! I wuvvvs u!