-an- I don't own any characters or palce. It probably isn't even my idea. I have a feeling it has been done before. One shot- came to me as I was trying to continue my other story. Sorry, I can't seem to get the shot of formatting. Thanks for reading! Please review.
It would be cliché to say I have had enough. I would be overanalyzed if I left a note. It would be too dangerous to use magic. I just want it to stop. I don't know how I got here and I don't want to reflect on where it went wrong. I just want to die.
I am so tired of pretending to be perfect.
I am so tired of being worshiped.
I am so tired of Gabrielle being better than me.
People only accept you if you are veela or not. Apparently you cannot be both. For me family it is not enough that I am part veela and my friends cannot seem to get past the fact. I have to sides of me that are just clashing within me and I didn't have the will to make them stop. My mom can't shut up about the fact I am marrying Bill and his family can't shut up because they think I fuss about them to much. I just wanted them to like me.
The edge of the bathtub was cold when I got slipped my toes in. I slip my robe off and in the mirror I can see my skinny shoulders shudder in the candle light, but then I get into the hot water I warm up. I can hear Ginny race up the stairs so I grab my wand off the toilet and lock the door.
I finger the blade on the edge of the tub and pick it up.
Ginny jiggles the door knob. "I'll be out in a moment Ginny'!" I yell through the bark oak door. She mutters something about Phlem. She hates me and I wanted to be her friend so badly. I just want to tell everybody it was an act. I want to moan from the top of a mountain 'I'm sorry.' I want to shout and tell everybody It wasn't my fault, it was my vela grandmother. I didn't choose to be a vela.
I pick up the blade and feel how smooth it is. I turn and my face reflects in it. I can see my soul. I own a soul of ego, perfectionism, of arrogance and of spite. I can see the nose my mother changed because she said it was too big. I see my eyes reflecting an emotion I can't describe. I see my small breasts that shrunk because my grandmother said I couldn't eat sugar anymore because of the fat.
Bill deserves better. I can't look after him the way he needs. I have my own needs I want to forget about but can't. I press the blade down.
This is for me not being able to save Gabrielle.
I can feel my vain becoming empty, and with all my strength I slit the other.
This is for my family.
The blade slips to the bottom of the tub. This is my life spilling from me. I touch the blood and bring it up to my face. My lips feel cold but I still smile.
This is for Bill and the baby I would have never been able to care for. Now she won't have to only be part veela.
The Water is getting colder, or it might just be me. It is getting redder.
I feel dizzy. I feel numb. But for once, I don't feel sad.
"Fleur, why are you laughing?" Ginny bangs on the wall from the bedroom.
Finally, it's here.