I don't own any of the characters here. Not even the Four Dark Gods of Destruction.

I apologise about any ooc situations that occur.


Diary of Gundam Tanaka

xx/xx/xxxx

Dear Diary,

Today was a strange day in the life of Gundam Tanaka! I am sure that this day shall be studied by humans all around the world as a chance to see how I lived!

I was awoken from my slumber at 05:00am by Jan P, to remind me that I had neglected to attend my blog of the Dark Arts for an entire 7 days and nights. As such, I was obliged to spend the next two hours handing out some select pieces of information from my Vast Library of Knowledge. However, just as I had written slightly less than it takes to send the average mortal spiralling into confusion and insanity, one Kazuichi Souda burst into my room, speaking loudly about how some of the reserve course students (he believed that they most likely under the orders of Miss Saionji) had stolen his favourite spanner, and could I please set my 'wild, demonic, flying bear' on them. He then went on to ask me the reason for me to be on a blog on taking care of small animals, when I should already know everything due to my title of 'Ultimate Animal Breeder', to which I replied that I was not in possession of any such creatures, and that I am, in fact, a Dark Lord, not an animal breeder. I also informed him that the website was about the Dark Arts, and that those with a lower astral level simply perceive it as a website about animals. Unfortunately, probably due to his sheer stupidity, he did not appear to believe in my truths. Honestly, he will probably live his life and die without making his mark on the world, and will be forgotten in only a few years, unlike me.

After spending just less than half an hour arguing with him, he eventually convinced me to lend him a hand dealing with the students that stole from him his tool of the trade. Naturally, however, I allowed the Four Dark Gods of Destruction to feast upon the food I created a week before today. As it turned out, they were not, in fact, in cohorts with Miss Saionji, but instead were taking orders from an unknown figure. Souda has been trying to make me assist him in his holy quest to find out the cause of his despairing. I have refused, but suggested that he seek out the advice of the first-year Kyouko Kirigiri, as her talent would likely prove indispensable in such a situation.

After the wretched mortal eventually left, I dined on two slices of toast as it was too early to have Luncheon, but too late to eat Breakfast. After my feast, I went and talked to Miss Sonia. She gave me an offering of wine from her homeland. I shall drink it later, when I am crowned ruler of the world. I also need to repay her in kind, so that I am no longer in her debt. I am still pondering what I should gift her with. Perhaps I shall let her country be the one place I do not have in my iron grip. What was originally a simple exchanging of pleasantries somehow transformed into the two of us conversing for several hours. It is unlike me to stoop to talking to a lowly human for so long, but the Four Dark Gods of Destruction appear to not dislike her, so I shall please them with her presence. It is not as if I, myself, like 'hanging out' with her; I am just doing it for the sake of the Four Dark Gods of Destruction, not myself whatsoever.

While we were talking, Miss Sonia mentioned the first-years. Apparently, the being gifted with good luck this year is very average, and seems to have more bad luck than good. Luckily, however, he does not bear any resemblance to Komaeda, whether in appearance or in personality, so he has that as a redeeming feature. She also spoke of a Junko Enoshima, who she says bumped onto her, and is who Sonia says is 'a real kind person, ya know?!'. As I am yet to meet her, I am unable to place any of my judgement upon her. As well as this, she entrusted me with the following advice: do not incur the wrath of the Ultimate Martial Artist. While those were not her exact words, I feel that the meaning transfers perfectly, and I am unable to maintain a perfect memory of what she spoke. While I have only gained a glimpse of the warrior, I must find myself agreeing with the instruction.

After three of the Four Dark Gods of Destruction fell into a deep slumber, I returned to my lair, where I would remain until the time to eat came again. The only one that remained awake-Sun D- gazed upon me with what appeared to be sadness, which was an anomaly. Surely happiness would be more likely, since we had finally escaped from spending much time with a measly human? It still confuses me, as my minions are usually in synch with their master's emotions, and yet at the time, I was not feeling anything even remotely associated with sadness at all. It is not as if I wish to spend any more time with Sonia at all, and I definitely do not wish to socialise with mortals any more than I already do. I am perfectly pleased with the fact that I spend an average of 2 hours a week conversing with humans, or that today was the most I had ever talked with humans. It pleasures me more to spend my time raising and breeding more minions.

I spent the time until supper arrived taking care of the Four Dark Gods of Destruction. Their beds need to be replaced as soon as it is a possibility, as they have started to weaken, and I am concerned that my minions shall injure themselves on them. For my meal, I had a simple bowl of vegetable soup as I was in a hurry to return and watch over my minion, and ensure that nothing happened to them while I left. When I made my return, I was relieved to find that they were still in perfect health. I lost track of time after this, and found myself guarding them until the sun began to fall.