"Yo! We're live in the Sevii Ilses, here to bring you the greatest reality show ev... Wait a minute."

A small, blue, levitating Pokemon scanned the sheet of paper he was reading from, a bewildered expression on his face. "Seriously?" he asked the cameraman. "Live? But it can't be. We've had previews airing on Unova's Reality Network. Hell, I saw one fifteen minutes ago with, like, the final fifteen. And you expect the audience to believe that this is live?"

The cameraman nodded.

"...do we really have the bar set that low?"

Again, the cameraman nodded.

"Huh." He turned back to the camera. "Okay, so! We have thirty-four contestants fighting for the prize of one! Million! Poke! For the next eight weeks, they'll be living in simple cabins, having to hunt for food and—"

The cameraman clear his throat.

"What, no hunting?"

The cameraman nodded.

"Oh, come on! They're Pokemon! I'm a Pokemon! You're an Emboar for Arceus's sake!"

Emboar snorted, giving him a dirty look.

With a melodramatic sigh, he said, "Fiiine, no hunting. I'll get Rotom to cook for them." He cleared his throat. "Now then, our contestants will be arriving shortly."

The sound of a roaring engine perked the host up considerably. "And here's our first contestant!"

A boat drove up to the dock, releasing the first contestant. Its white and purple fur and "I'm better than you disposition" of a cat was the tell that it was a female Meowstic.

"Heya girl," said the host. "How's it feel to be the first one here?"

"Besides you and the flaming boar?" Meowstic said, somewhat amused. "Hey... Actually, you look familiar. Aren't you a legendary Pokemon?"

He smirked. "The best of my two siblings, that's me."

"So you're Uxie."

He scowled. "Azelf."

Meowstic smirked. "The best? Second rate is more like it."

Azelf pushed her off the dock, satisfied with the smack-like splash.

The next boat arrived, releasing an orange camel-like Pokemon. Immediately, it surveyed the summer camps like area, and then groaned. "This is gonna suck, isn't it?" asked Numel.

Azelf gave a dismissive wave. "Relax, it'll be fine."

Meowstic climbed up from the water, her fur soaking wet. "In other words, yes," she scowled.

The next boat releasing a small, round, pink Pokemon. With a giggle that was most definitely feminine, she said, "Hi, I'm Igglybuff!"

"Happy to be here?" Azelf asked.

"You bet! This'll be the perfect chance to make friends!"

The host nodded. "I can honestly say that I'll be sad when your bubble is popped."

"When?" Numel asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I agree," came the female voice of the fourth contestant. Its small, round, green body revealed her to be a Natu. "Azelf, I do hope that sadism isn't your shtick, otherwise this will be no different from the many other reality shows that have aired only to crash and burn."

"Of course not." Azelf seemed a little offended. "What do you take me for, Mew? As If anyone could reach the wicked dickery of that jackass."

Natu gave a slight nod of approval before joining the other three at the other end of the dock.

The fifth Pokemon to arrive was a small black avian. He waved. "Hey guys. I'm Taillow."

"Okay," said Azelf. "Anything else?"

Taillow shook his head.

"Then get over there," he said, using his psychic powers to push him over to the others.

The sixth contestant was a serpent-like Pokemon, light yellow and blue. A Dunsparce. He grinned. "Sup guys. I'm here to meet some dames and play some games, and I'm all out of dames."

Meowstic rolled her eyes. "Gee, I wonder why."

The next boat arrived, revealing a bipedal green mushroom Pokemon. "Hi there. My name's Breloom."

There was an awkward moment of silence.

"...What?"

Meowstic cleared her throat, bringing everyone's attention to her. "Alright, Piloswine in the room, I'm gonna say it: where the hell are your arms?"

Breloom wiggled his stubby little hands. "Haven't you seen a Breloom before?"

"...no. No, I haven't."

Breloom shrugged.

"How are you shrugging?" She asked, enunciating her words.

Again, Breloom shrugged, causing Meowstic to groan.

The next to arrive was a Skorupi that simply exuded spunk. She snickered upon seeing the other seven. "Ah, now that's what I like to see. A ragtag bunch of misfits, just like my old crew!"

"Misfits?" asked Taillow.

"In what world is there a group of people including a cynic and a happy-go-lucky girl willingly working together?" Numel asked, referring to himself and Igglybuff.

But before anything else could be said, there was a loud music beat.

"Everyday I'm Shucklin'."

Music started up as all eyes landed on the Shuckle that had stepped onto the dock. His shades completely drove home the point that this guy was wicked cool.

No one could take their eyes off as he sauntered forward, his movements having the effect of slow motion.

And then he tripped.

The music came to a screeching halt as his shades tumbled off. He looked up to the others and chuckled. "Guess that's enough of that," he said, standing back up and storing his shades in his shell. He slithered towards the others, standing next to Dunsparce.

The serpent gave him a look of awe. "Dude. You and me. We're gonna be bros for life."

"You know it." Shuckle bumped a tentacle on Dunsparce's head to simulate a fist bump.

The ninth (re: tenth) one to arrive was a Girafarig, who seemed fairly normal. At least until she spoke. "...What? Come on, be nice... No, I'm not telling that Shuckle that he could pass for C'thuhlu, stop saying that."

Meowstic was the first to speak after an awkward silence. "Are you talking to... your tail?"

Girafarig seemed a bit shocked that Meowstic spoke, though quickly relaxed. "Oh, yeah. Sorry if she's giving trouble."

"That's... Okay?"

Girafarig smiled before walking to the others, still gaining confused stares.

"So, what, is that a tail puppet?" Skorupi asked.

Girafarig frowned. "No, she's a—"

"Butt puppet!" Skorupi interrupted, as if she had made a great breakthrough. "A Buppet!"

"That's... weird," said Helioptile.

"Wait, Helioptile?" Azelf asked. "When did you get here?"

"Uh, I plead the fifth?"

Azelf pushed him to the other end of the dock, accidentally bumping him into the Lucario that had just arrived into the lake. "Go get properly introduced."

"Okay, okay! Sheesh..." The black and yellow electric lizard noticed the camera, and started to get uneasy. "Uh, can you... not point the camera at me?"

Azelf was unamused. "Dude, you're on a reality show. You'd think you'd realize that being televized was a given."

Helioptile rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah, you'd think that..." He walked over to the others just as Lucario climbed up from the lake.

He scowled. "You know, I don't really appreciate being pushed into water upon arriving."

"And I don't really appreciate you," Azelf said. "You getting a Mega Evolution and I don't, how dare you?"

"That's irrelevant."

"It's relevant enough to be an excuse for you to be the designated butt monkey, now let someone else have the spot light."

Lucario grumbled, heading over to the others.

The thirteenth to arrive was a Pokemon that, at first, seemed to have a terrifying glare. Then everyone realized that it was simply her wings, and not Masquerain herself.

She bowed as much as she could. "Delighted to be here."

"This is Masquerain!" Azelf said, stating the obvious.

Skorupi groaned. "Ugh, a snooty rich girl."

Masquerain eyed the purple bug, floating over to her. "Excuse me, Skorupi, was it? I'll have you know that making a first impression be your only one to be quite costly. I, personally, find myself to be tolerant, not snooty, and I actually come from a middle class family. We're well off, but far from rich. So please, do try to see from outward appearances."

Skorupi hummed, mulling it over. "Yeah, I guess you're right. That's a good thing to improve my viewpoint, thanks!"

Masquerain nodded. "Not a problem, my friend."

As soon as Masquerain fluttered into the group, the next boat arrived, revealing a Lilligant. She gave a demure wave. "Hi, my name's—"

"Outta the way, cupcake," snorted a Magmar, who stomped on by, pushing Lilligant out of the way and into the water.

"That was Lilligant, and this is Magmar," said Azelf. "Glad to be here, Magmar?"

"Only if I win the money, Twinkle toes," he said, snorting flames.

"Hey Lucario, good news. I hate Magmar now, so you're off the butt monkey hook!"

But Lucario wasn't listening. Currently, he had his hand outstretched to Lilligant, the former still in the water. "Here, let me help you," he said.

Lilligant blushed, taking the hand that started helping her out of the water. "T-Thank you."

Lucario nodded.

Azelf gave a uim. "This is taking too long, don't you guys agree?"

"We have to be at least half way through, right?" said Breloom.

"Okay, one, no, we've still got nineteen more to introduce. Two, I was talking to the readers. I mean... yeah, readers."

"Don't you mean viewers?" Numel asked. "This is a reality show, you know."

"Which totally give me free reign to slap the fourth wall silly," Azelf said, then turned to you. "Can you believe this guy?"

The cameraman grunted, bringing Azelf's attention back to reality.

"Ah, right." He took out a phone and immediately started talking into it. "Rotom, bring them by threes instead, this is taking too long. And also, do you know where I can find a restaurant that allows me to throw a party? We both know what happened to the last one." He paused before moving the phone away. "Guess I should dial something first."

But Rotom seemed to share Azelf's sentiments, for the next boat to arrive housed three Pokemon, one of them bolting out the moment the boat hit the dock.

"Someone tell that Hoppip to stay far away from me," snarled the Krokorok that had stepped onto the dock. "She's insane."

"...and so then, Granny DialGaGa sacrificed herself for the glory of Delibird, and I'm the reincarnation of her! So, in short, my name is Hoppip!" came Hoppip's voice as she left the boat with an uneasy looking Furret.

The Furret nodded. "That's... good to hear?"

Hoppip gasped. "Oh, we're here!"

"We're here?!" Furret gasped, noticing the others on the dock. She hastily composed herself before saying, "Uhm, hi! I'm Furret, and I hope to make lots of friends!"

Krokorok snorted. "This isn't a friendly competition, Red."

She seemed confused at the nickname before realizing what he meant. She instinctively touched the flower adorned on her right ear. "Oh, my flower! ...am I the only one who accessorised?"

"We're Pokemon, darling," Masquerain smiled warmly. "That's not a thing that we do."

"I think it looks pretty on you," Breloom said.

Furret blushed.

The next boat arrived, releasing a disappointed Corphish. "Man, these two are downers," Corphish said, pointing back to the boat. "They wouldn't even smile at my jokes!"

"I, uhm, can't smile," stuttered the Lampent that exited the boat. She bowed her head shyly before floating over to the others.

"And I just thought it was stupid," said the Furfrou that exited the boat as well.

"Aw, c'mon, have a heart," Corphish said.

"No," Furfrou said gruffly before he walked over to the others.

The next boat nearly broke everyone's eardrums, as a piercing squeal erupted from it, followed by an identical one. Once the boat docked, an Inkay and a Spheal exited the boat, chatting it up.

"You look amazing!" complimented the Spheal. "And there's no make up at all?"

"Nope!" chirped Inkay. "I don't even know what make up is!"

"Me neither!"

Most of the others stared in shock.

"Oh dear Arceus, that Inkay is the cutest thing ever," Helioptile gaped.

"They're both annoying," Furfrou grunted.

"I'll need hearing aids if I'm on the same team as them," Numel added.

"Consider yourself lucky you didn't have to share a boat with them," moaned the third Pokemon on the boat. She stumbled out, revealing herself to be a Venipede.

"I feel sorry for you," Azelf said to Venipede. "No, really. Now get over to the others. We've still got ten left."

She complied, and immediately after, another boat arrived. Stepping off first was a Kricketune, suspended in air using her wings. Lifting an arm, she proceeded to sound out a melody that calmed even the most irritable.

And then Hoppip landed on her.

"HI! I'm Hoppip what's your name oh you're a Kricketune good to know do you know what happened in Navel Rock I sure don't!"

Kricketune just stared wide-eyed, unable to grasp a single word. "Uhm... Hi?"

A Munchlax exited the boat, looking fairly confident until he took a step on the dock. Immediately, his entire body broke through the wood, leaving him stuck. "Aw man, not again."

"Want me to help you?" offered the Hippopotas that exited after him.

"Yeah, duh."

He steadied himself in front of the piece of wood closest to Munchlax' position. With a deep breathe, he slowly lowered his front hoof. Slowly... Slowly... Slooow—

"Jeez, come on already!" Munchlax grunted.

Ignoring the demand, Hippopotas lightly tapped the wood, causing it to flip the other end up, releasing Munchlax.

Everyone just stared.

Hippopotas shrugged sheepishly. "Yeah, I'm kinda strong. One tap is all I need. Of course, I can't really actually hit the ground like that without—"

Unfortunately, Hippopotas stomped on the dock absentmindedly to prove his point, which caused Munchlax to hurtle far into the lake.

"...something... bad... happening," Hippopotas finished.

Munchlax's voice was heard clear as day. "HELP I'VE FLOATEN AND I CAN'T GET UP. CALL LIFE ALERT."

"I'd like to help, but we're kind of on a schedule here," Azelf shrugged. "Next boat."

The next one to arrive also docked, if that wasn't obvious enough. The first of three was a small little Floette. She smiled. "Hi! I hope to have lots of fun!"

"That's not what this game's about," came the male voice of a Zoroark, who exited the boat after her. "But I guess ignorance is bliss."

The duo walked over to the others, Azelf looking confused. "There should be three on there, not two."

"You must not have seen me, then," shrugged a Mr. Mime that stood behind Azelf.

Azelf recoiled slightly. "Oh, it's you. The magician guy."

Mr. Mime tipped his top hat. "That'd be me."

Meowstic seemed suddenly interested in this new arrival. "You're a... magician?" she asked, eyes widened.

Mr. Mime gave a knowing smile. "Indeed. After all, what you see..." He reached behind her ear and pulled out a magician's wand. "...is what you get." He handed the wand to Meowstic.

She eyed it with interest and shock. "This is..."

"Is what?" asked Taillow.

Immediately she scowled, tucking the wand away in her neck fluff. "It's nothing, shut up."

"Four more to go!" Azelf said, a little bit relieved. "All four should be on the next bo... dammit."

Indeed, the boat arrived, though a little too quickly. It crashed into the previous boat, then immediately caught on fire.

"The boat, the boat, the boat is on fire!" Hoppip cackled.

"WE DON'T NEED NO WATER LET THAT SEA MO-BIEL BURN," Munchlax called out.

Apparently, that's what they did, for they just left it to burn. The remaining four scurried off from the boat before it exploded.

"This is Ampharos, Corsola, Absol, and Rampardos!" Azelf announced.

Ampharos panted. "Hey there... I'm in it... to win it!... ooh, boy..."

Corsola seemed more composed than her female friend. "Yeah... Same here."

Absol grunted. "I hope this isn't an ill omen of things to come," he said.

"Yeeeeah, I have a little more faith in this game," Rampardos said.

"Rampardos."

"Yeah?"

"You're tipping the dock," Azelf said.

Within seconds, the dock tipped upside down, sending everyone down into the water.

"...are we on? We are? Okay." Azelf cleared his throat before addressing everyone else, now on dry land. "Sorry about that, folks."

"YOU SHOULD BE YOU LITTLE—"

Furfrou kicked the fuming Magmar back into the water.

"Furfrou, just for that, you get automatic immunity," Azelf said.

Furfrou shrugged.

"Anyway, in case you haven't noticed, you are on Pokemon Drama Island! Here in the secluded Ten Isles, you will be competing with and against each other for the grand prize of one million Poke!"

Some perked up at the mention of the prize.

"At this moment, you'll be split up into two teams. When I call your name, please stand to the right of me." He motioned to the general spot next to him. "Furret... Natu... Ampharos..."

Furret seemed surprised to have been picked first, Ampharos seemed confident, and Natu just seemed stoic.

"Taillow... Breloom... Corphish..."

Taillow and Breloom smiled, while Corphish pumped his fist into the air.

"Zoroark... Floette... Mr. Mime..."

Zoroark nodded, Floette grinned, and Mr. Mime tipped his hat.

"Meowstic... Inkay... Venipede..."

"Crap," muttered Venipede. Meowstic seemed confident, while Inkay giggled.

"Skorupi... Dunsparce... Shuckle..."

Skorupi snickered while Dunsparce and Shuckle shared a fist bump.

"Munchlax and Hippopotas."

The duo grinned.

"You seventeen will henceforth be known as... The Mystic Mesprit!"

There were some cheers, some murmurs, and some looks of curiousity., but none were expanded on before Azelf got to calling the next team.

"For team two, please stand to the left of me. Krokorok... Masquerain... Corsola..."

Krokorok smirked, Corsola grinned, and Masquerain gave a small smile.

"Girafarig... Lucario... Rampardos..."

Girafarig stomped her hooves to signal approval, Lucario gave a slight nod, and Rampardos nodded his head like yeah.

"Lilligant... Lampent... Kricketune..."

Lilligant smiled, Lampent bowed, and Kricketune hummed.

"Helioptile... Furfrou... Numel..."

"Oh joy," said both Furfrou and Numel cynically. They looked at each other in shock, then gave each other nods of approval. Helioptile tried his best to avoid the camera.

"Spheal... Absol... Magmar, " Azelf seethed, gritting his teeth.

Spheal clapped her fins, Absol nodded, and Magmar glared, puffing out a puff of smoke.

"Igglybuff and Hoppip," Azelf finished.

Both of them cheered for slightly different reasons.

"You guys are now... The Annoying Uxies!"

"Um. What," Numel said flatly.

"That's not alliterative," Furfrou said.

"Of course it is!" argued Azelf. "The 'uh' in 'annoying' and the 'yew' in 'Uxie' are both sounds the letter U makes!"

"Then it's not alliterative," said Numel. "It's assonance. Hell, not even that."

"Potato, pot-8-os."

"Why are we annoying and they're mystic?" Krokorok said, raising an eyebrow.

"Magmar," he said bluntly. Before Magmar could give any threats, Azelf clasped his hands together. "Okay! Onto the tour!"

He led he thirty-four contestants to a campfire pit. "This here is the place most of you will come to hate."

"What if we hate it already?" Numel said.

"Then you're a downer and I can tell that you'll somehow be a fan favorite when you do nothing productive. But back to this! Every few days, each team will participate in a challenge. The winning team receives immunity, meaning they get to stay here for another few days. The losing team, however, must report here the following night, where you will vote off the person of your choosing. It could be because they cost your team the challenge. Maybe because they're planning to off you, so you turn the tables. Or maybe it's simply because they are unlikable. The point is, you have only your allies and your enemies, and sometimes, your allies can become your enemies."

This caused a few worried glances between the two teams.

Azelf continued, motioning towards an outhouse stationed close to the campfire pit. "That there is the confession cam. Use it to express your inner most secrets and fears. It's also where you'll vote who to eliminate."

"What happens if you're eliminated?" asked Floette.

"Uh, just that?"

"No, I mean, where do they go?"

"Ah. The loser must head over to the Dock of Shame, which... isn't repaired yet, so I hope you like a swim! Board the Boat of Losers, and you can never come back. EV—ER. Any questions?"

Zoroark raised his hand. "Are the confessionals private?"

"Should be," Azelf shrugged.

Zoroark's eyes narrowed, but he ultimately stayed silent.

"Alright then," Azelf said, and he led everyone to the mess hall. There, it was exactly as the name implied. Most of the tables and the walls looked to have been cleaned once in its olden life. Stationed at the end was presumably the cook, who fit the profile of a Rotom.

"Hey, is that Rotom?" Taillow asked.

"Duh," Azelf said, floating over to Rotom. "Heya buddy, say something for our audience at home."

"If you expect me to cook for thirty-four teens, you're out of your mind, Azelf," Rotom grunted.

"That was Rotom!" Azelf said gleefully.

"Duh," Magmar sneered, resulting in a glare from the blue legendary.

"Anywaaay, every morning and afternoon, you'll report here for breakfast or dinner. Our kind cook Rotom has been so kind as to agree to cook for you all."

"Not thirty-four, Azelf," Rotom groaned. "I was expecting somewhere around twenty-five."

Azelf gave him a pat on the back. "Don't worry buddy; the numbers will dwindle soon enough."

Some seemed uneasy at that.

"Alright then," Azelf said. "I'll show you to your cabins, and then you can come back here for breakfast, or you can just dick around the island."

He led the teams to two wooden cabins, looking to be on the verge of collapse. "Right cabin is Mesprit's, left is Uxie's. Girls get the right side, boys the left. Any questions?"

Besides a few murmurs amongst each other, nothing was said.

"Alright then. I'll see you later." With a snap of his fingers, he teleported away, allowing everyone to congregate to their rooms.

Mesprit's/Girls

Most of the female Mesprits decided on simply staying in their rooms. As they situated themselves to the bunk beds, Furret decided to strike up a conversation.

"So, uhm, how are you guys?" she asked sheepishly. Small talk wasn't really once of Furret's fortes.

"I had my ears crying blood, it was great!" Venipede snarled, irritation and sarcasm mixing together.

"Aw, what's wrong, you mad at little old' Inkay?" Skorupi said, fluttering her suddenly visible eyelashes. She lied casually on the bunk atop of Venipede's.

"And Spheal, yes," Venipede scowled.

"Hey, come on now," Ampharos said, finished with stuffing her suitcases under the bed that was under Furret's. She picked up Inkay. "This ain't a face you can stay mad at."

She lightly squeezed Inkay, causing her to look like a plush doll. The squid gave a giggle, flapping her little fins.

"My ears beg to differ."

"You don't have any."

"That doesn't mean she's incapable of hearing noises," Natu said, poking her head up from the bunk above Inkay's, "regardless if she hasn't any visible ones."

Ampharos shrugged. "Eh, I guess so. Still, if it were me, I don't think I could get mad at Inkay ever."

"Well, Venipede isn't you."

"True."

From one of the empty bunks, Meowstic said, "Hey, could you keep it down? Some of us are trying to sleep."

"At ten AM?" Furret asked.

"You try waking up at three in the morning just to make it to the boat on time."

"Can't you just teleport?" Skorupi asked.

Meowstic didn't answer. She just pulled the covers over her head.

%%%

Meowstic: This sucks. Don't they know we have a challenge soon? I swear, if they get voted off because they can't do anything, they'll only have themselves to blame.

%%%

Mesprits/Boys

"But seriously dude. There's gotta be a party ball in here."

"Yeah, totally," Shuckle nodded at Dunsparce's comment.

"Thirded!" Munchlax cheered.

"Fourthed! Hippopotas agreed.

Taillow wasn't sure how to feel about this. "I'm not sure how to feel about this."

"I do," Corphish said, raising a claw. "Fifthed! You in, Taillow?"

"...Sixthed?"

"WHOO!" the other five cheered.

"Majority rules!" Munchlax said. "Six to three, aw yeah!"

"More like six to none," Corphish said. "The other three are in the mess hall."

"I think I'll go in there then," Taillow said.

"Aw, you cop out!" Corphish teased. "But I'll come with."

Taillow and Corphish walked out, leaving the other four to their discussion.

Uxies/Girls

"...and that was the song that tamed Mr. Wiggles," Kricketune concluded.

"My tail says it's nice!" Girafarig said.

Lament gave a bow. "I enjoyed it."

Hoppip was writing down the lyrics. "Okay, so when you say 'Kindness is in the air', do you really mean, 'I want to feast on a Tropius's innards'?"

"What does 'innards' mean?" Spheal asked innocently.

"You don't need to know, darling," Masquerain said. "Now would you like to pick out some beds now, you all?"

"Well, I already have," Corsola said, sitting on the bed atop of Masquerain.

Masquerain nodded. "Then it seems you're the only one who did."

"I don't know. I think I saw Igglybuff set up her things."

"Yup!" Igglybuff said from her bed. She hopped down and joined the others.

"And Lilligant?" Masquerain continued.

"She's over at the mess hall, I think."

Masquerain gave a hum. "I suppose I'll go check on her, then."

"You really shouldn't," Corsola said. "She's her own Pokemon; you can't just make sure everyone's in sync like that. Kills some sort of vibe, I think."

With a him, Masquerain asked, "Then what do you suppose I do?"

"Sleep. Get ready for the challenge." With that, Corsola threw her blanket over herself, trying to nap.

Mulling it over, Masquerain ultimately decided to follow her words, taking a spot underneath her bed.

Uxies/Boys

The boys side, meanwhile, wasn't nearly as hectic. Most of them had decided on their beds and were now currently relaxing.

Krokorok, however, was busy using his nail to scratch the ceiling.

From below his bed, Rampardos poked his head up. "What's going on there?"

"I'm carving a skull," he said simply.

"Isn't that a thing you should, y'know, not do?"

Krokorok scoffed. "What are you, a cop?"

"N–" Rampardos stopped, checking over himself quickly before saying, "Nope, not a cop."

Rolling his eyes, Krokorok said, "Then mind your own business, capiche?"

"Hey!" Magmar called out. "You losers gonna shut your yaps or do I gotta do it myself?"

Krokorok just turned to Rampardos. "Hey, how much you wanna bet I can twist Magmar in a knot in twelve seconds."

"Oh, I don't bet. Last year, I kind of lost a good chunk of money from a Pyroar in a wizard's cloak that played a card trick on me."

The Ground type just gave Rampardos a look that said 'Dude, focus.'.

"Oh. Riiiight," he said, giving a conspiratory wink.

From above Magmar's bed, Absol calmly told the Fire type, "You might want to start running."

"Oh yeah? What's gonna–" He stopped suddenly, seeing Krokorok suddenly in front of him, knuckles cracking. "...make... me."

"I'm a nice guy; I'll give ya ten seconds," Krokorok said.

With a sheepish chuckle, Magmar started towards the door. "You know, I just realized I left the, uh, microwave oven toaster coffee maker... Y'know' I'm just gonna go now." He bolted out of the room.

With a smirk and a snort, Krokorok said, "That's more like it."

"Agreed," Furfrou said from his top bunk. "Magmar's presence just irritates me."

"What doesn't?" Numel asked from the bunk below Furfrou's.

"Fair enough."

Those that weren't in their cabins were sitting within the mess hall. No one knew each other well enough to sit in groups greater than three, and the only group that did consisted of Zoroark, Floette, and Mr. Mime.

"So, this food looks... Nice?" Floette said in an effort to make conversation.

"It's burnt sausage. The only Pokemon that would find this nice would be hardcore carnivores," Zoroark said.

She giggled. "Hardcore carnivore; nice rhyme!"

"...yeah?"

She gave a sly yet innocent grin. "You must be a poet that didn't even know it!"

"Sure, let's go with that," he shrugged.

%%%

Zoroark: Let's make no pretenses for this season. I'm what you call a power player; I'm going to play the game, and I'll do a damn good job at it, guaranteed. (Leans back a little) Step one; know thy enemy.

%%%

"So, what's your story?" Zoroark asked, pointing his spoon at Mr. Mime's direction. "A magician doesn't seem that practical here."

Mr. Mime shrugged. "I like being in competitions. You'll never know what happens, just like with magic."

"So there's the connection," Zoroark murmured to himself, out of Mr. Mime's earshot.

"Can you do a magic trick now?" Floette asked, eyes gleaming. Suddenly, they began to gleam even brighter, with a dazzling light flashing between the trio.

Mr. Mime seemed in phase, but Zoroark hissed. "Gah! What the hell was that?!"

She shrank back, refusing to meet Zoroark's eyes. "Sometimes that happens... I get too excited, and I use some of my moves. Mostly Dazzling Gleam."

"A Fairy type move," Mr. Mime noted.

"Obviously," Zoroark groaned, rubbing his eyes.

"Sorry," she apologized.

%%%

Zoroark: (Gargles eyes with eye drops)

%%%

With those three resuming their breakfast, others like Breloom were far enough away to not even notice the mini spectacle. In fact, he was content in pretending to eat his burnt food. That is, until Corphish and Taillow barged in, the former slinging his arm around Breloom.

"Hey hey, what's up man?" Corphish said. "You missed one heck of a debate."

"Apparently, everybody loves party balls," Taillow said. Seeing Breloom's confused expression, he added, "Yeah, I thought the same thing."

"Aw, come on, party balls are amazing! Almost as great as disco balls!"

"Aren't those the ones you see—"

"At discos, duh," Corphish said, interrupting Breloom. "Dude, get cultured."

"And get your feet checked," said a voice from under the table. "Seriously, you're poking my tail."

Breloom glanced under the table. "Oh, sorry Helioptile." He adjusted his feet accordingly.

"Thanks."

Corphish ducked under the table. "Dude! Why are you under there?"

Helioptile poked his head out. "I'm avoiding the cameras."

"But you're on a reality show," Taillow pointed out.

"Yeah... Not one of my brightest ideas."

At another table, Lucario sat alone, simply eating his breakfast. That is, until someone tapped his shoulder. He glanced over, seeing Lilligant. "Hello."

"Hi," she said. "I just wanted to thank you for earlier."

"Pulling you out of the lake?"

Lilligant nodded. "Yes. That. Thank you."

Lucario gave a slight nod, taking a bite out of his food. "You're welcome."

Lilligant was prepared to speak more until the intercom buzzed. "Time to begin, campers! Please file into the mess hall! Absences will be dealt with by having you fired. Out of a cannon. Let's go!"

As soon as it fizzled to a stop, Lilligant silently groaned.

%%%

Lilligant: I didn't really get the chance to thank Lucario more than I already did, and that's just going to bother me for the rest of the day.

%%%

Everyone gradually started walking in, and soon, all thirty-four players were squished into the mess hall.

With a grandiose blue cloud of smoke, Azelf appeared in front of everyone. Of course, most of them closest to Azelf started coughing.

"Could you–gack!–not appear like that anymore?" Absol coughed. "I'm an asthmatic."

"Sucks to be you!" Azelf said, swishing the smoke away from himself. "But now it's time for your first challenge! Meet me up that super huge cliff, pronto!" With that, he teleported away, leaving behind another cloud of blue smoke.

"I wonder what the first challenge's gonna be?" Furret asked, coughing afterwards.

Krokorok scoffed then coughed. "It's our first challenge. Odds are, it's better than being in here."

No sooner had he said that, the smoke was just enough to turn on the sprinklers, drenching everyone in not-so-sprinkly water.

One thing was clear.

This was gonna suck.

A/N: So it begins! I gotta say, I have high hopes for this story, and I'm not gonna let it die like my other fics. ...actually, none of my TD docs are really dead. They're just updated really sporadically. This will probably have some sort of priority higher than the others, but I doubt it. But this will be finished, come hell or high water.

Now, if you're like me and hate introducing every character for one chapter, sorry, but it had to be done. Here's a list of all the characters and their stereotypes.

...

Absol: The Seer (aka, male Dawn)

Ampharos: The Action Girl Heroine

Breloom: The Responsible Guy (aka, Mike without MPD being the focus for his drama)

Corphish: The Class Clown

Corsola: The Go-With-The-Flow Girl (aka, sort of Bridgette, but not entirely)

Dunsparce: The Party Dude

Floette: The Accident Prone

Furfrou: The Grouch

Furret: The Nice Girl (aka, Zoey in all her holy glory)

Girafarig: The Buppet Master (aka, crazy like Trent, but for a different reason)

Helioptile: The Average Joe

Hippopotas: The Strong Guy

Hoppip: The Crazy Chick (aka, Izzy)

Igglybuff: The Friend To All

Inkay: The Cutie Patootie

Kricketune: The Music Maker (aka, Ella)

Krokorok: The Delinquent (aka, Duncan, only without the attention whoring or Karma Houdini tendencies)

Lament: The Polite Lady

Lilligant: The Pushover (more in a literal sense)

Lucario: The Leader

Magmar: The Wannabe Punk

Masquerain: The Regal and Refined Lady

Meowstic: The Power Player(aka, World Tour-esque Heather; aka the most interesting character I'll ever write)

Mr. Mime: The Magician

Munchlax: The Lovable Lug (aka, kind of Owen, though not entirely)

Natu: The Stoic Chick

Numel: The High IQ (aka, Noah)

Rampardos: The Right-Hand Man (aka, sort of plays the Tyler role, but is really a homage to Kronk from The Emperor's New Groove)

Shuckle: The Party Dude's Best Bro

Skorupi: The Spunky Chick (aka, sort of Junko from Dangan Ronpa)

Spheal: The Ball Of Fun

Taillow: The Middle Man

Venipede: The Snark Knight (aka, Megara from Hercules)

Zoroark: The Devious Player

...

Azelf: The Host With The Most

Room: That One Guy Who Seems To Always Be With The Host For Some Inexplicable Reason

...

NEXT TIME: "Not-So-Happy Campers Part 2": To start things off, he teams are going to have to dive off of a thousand foot cliff. You know, because that's totally original. In the end, one team will have to say good bye to another.

...

Special thanks to Dark Amphithere, who was more than supportive about this. Seriously dude, you rock!