Confessions of a 15-year-old
Author: x therapeutic smile
Rating: PG-13
A/N: I've recently figured out the reason I enjoy writing fan fiction
for Lizzie McGuire is because I can do whatever I want with the
characters. They don't have enough personality on their own, that I
feel like I have to stay inside those lines. In this story, that's what
I'm attempting to do. You don't know anything about the person writing
these entries, if they're male, female, their name, or anything. Just
that they're an average 15-year-old who has finally found a way to
escape from his or her life through writing.
I wish it was the ninety's again. I miss being young and perfectly content with my life, because I didn't know anything better than what I had. This is my first time writing in a diary. I doubt this will help me any, but I figure it's worth a shot. For the first entry, I'm going to be writing (or ranting) about friends and family. So first off, I'd like to say I honestly do love all these people, that's why I'm writing this. This way I'm not going to snap and say all of these things to their faces and end up hurting them. Anyway, here we go.
Gordo – I love Gordo like crazy. He may honestly be one of the few people I'm never going to have anything bad to say about. But sometimes, it kills me watching him with his girlfriend, Janelle. I'm not sure if it's because I want that, a relationship, someone who cares about me like he cares about Janelle. Or if it's because I want him.
Kate – She's like Gordo, she's one of my best friends. I wish we hadn't lost those years in middle school, but at least I have her for a little while. In two weeks she's leaving. One of my best friends is leaving and moving to Virginia. And I have a feeling things are never going to be the same.
Lizze – I really do love Lizzie, but she seems to like talking about Miles too much. They're not dating, and sometimes I really think she talks their "relationship" up. Also, sometimes I feel like she's mad at me for no real reason. Sometimes, when I'm with her and other people too, I feel like we have to be attached at the hip, or else she's going to get pissed off. Not only that, a lot of the time she seems fake. She wants to fit in too badly to be herself.
Ethan – I can't help but think we're not going to be as good of friends once Kate moves.
Melinda – SHE'S NOT A SLUT! She wants to go around, and make-out with everyone, and sleep with everyone, when, frankly, she's not hot enough. She's pretty, and I'm not saying she isn't. It's just, her personality isn't good enough to get her every guy in the world, and neither is her body. Sometimes I just want to sit and yell at her for forever, but other times she's perfectly nice, and I enjoy being around her. I don't know.
Miranda – I really do love her, but sometimes I feel like her psychiatrist and I can't handle all of her problems on top of mine.
Parker – I don't understand why she hates me so much.
Aunt Rachel – She always asks me why I'm upset, and she won't stop pushing. She needs to learn when to back off, and leave me alone.
Mom – She makes me feel bad when I don't agree with her and I feel like I can't live up to her standards. I know she doesn't mean to do it, but she still does. She's the one single person on earth that I know loves me more than anyone else. Sometimes, I don't know if that's a good thing or not.
Dad – I never know with him. Sometimes I love him so much and sometimes he makes me want to crawl in bed and never come back out. I don't think he means to make me feel like that, but I'm not always sure. Last night I saw "Elizabethtown" and Orlando Bloom's father dies. There's all these flashbacks to when he was a kid with his dad, and it made me want to hug mine. But when I woke up this morning, he just yelled at me. I never did get to hug him.
I want to sleep but I know I shouldn't, I should be productive and get things done. I need a boyfriend, good grades and some medication.
Actually, I don't know what I need.