"What's The Time, Mister Wolf?"

Pairing:Remus Lupin / Sirius Black

Rating: "M" for slash and implied sexual acts.

DISCLAIMER: This story is fictional – that's F-I-C-T-I-O-N. It never happened, and is not real. It is the product of my own imagination. It contains descriptions of male slash (that's male/male homosexual relations). If you do not like this type of content, or if you find homosexuality or its practice offensive, please click the "Back" button or close your Internet browser NOW, and do not read any further. All characters and copyrights are owned by J.K Rowling and Warner Brothers™ (AOL Time Warner), but this story is owned by me and is all my own work.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: The format of this story is based on the children's book of the same title, which teaches kids how to tell the time. I cannot remember who wrote it, neither can my Beta, and neither of us can be arsed to look it up – but I'm sure that those of us who grew up in the U.K. remember it, even if somewhat vaguely.

"What's the time, Mister Wolf?"
"Time to get up."
"Why?"
"Because we're going to be late for work."
"Why?"
"Because we slept in – again."
"Oops, Mister Wolf!"

"What's the time, Mister Wolf?"
"Time to go to work."
"Why?"
"Because we have to earn some money."
"Why?"
"Because otherwise we won't be eating dinner this evening."
"Okay, Mister Wolf!"

"What's the time, Mister Wolf?"
"Time to go round to Lily and James's house."
"Why?"
"Because we have to baby-sit for little Harry."
"Why?"
"Because Lily and James haven't had any time off since Harry was born, and they need some time alone for once."
"That's naughty, Mister Wolf!"

"What's the time, Mister Wolf?"
"Time for me to cook dinner."
"Why?"
"Because I'm not letting you do it."
"Why?"
"Because the last time you did the cooking, you nearly poisoned me and burned down the kitchen at the same time."

"Sorry, Mister Wolf!"
"What's the time, Mister Wolf?"
"Time for me to read my book."
"Why?"
"Because I've nearly finished it and I want to know how it ends."
"Why?"
"Because otherwise I'll have to finish it later in bed, and then we won't be able to play. And you wouldn't like that, would you?"
"No, Mister Wolf!"

"What's the time, Mister Wolf?"
"Time to go to bed"
"Why?"
"Because we have to get up early for work tomorrow morning."
"Why?"
"Because we don't want to be late like we were this morning, do we?"
"But I don't wanna, Mister Wolf!"

"What's the time, Mister Wolf?"
"Time to go to sleep."
"Why?"
"Because I'm very tired."
"Why?"
"Because you've been asking me what the time is all day!"
"But I haven't got a watch, Mister Wolf!"
"Well, you'd better buy one, hadn't you?
"Why?"
"Because otherwise I'll have to punish you!"
"What do you mean, Mister Wolf?
"Well, I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll blow–"
"Oh, Mister Wolf! What big eyes you have!"
"All the better to see you with..."
"Oh, Mister Wolf! What big lips you have!"
"All the better to kiss you with..."
"Oh, Mister Wolf! What a big tongue you have!"
"All the better to lick you with..."
"Oh, Mister Wolf! What a big… Oooh! Mister Woo-o-lf!"