Hey you guys. I know I was supposed to start posting this story months ago but unfortunately things don't always go as planned. I've gotten to a point where i'm comfortable posting it although its not done. I'm hoping some positive reviews and feedback and suggestions will get my writing gears going again. The story contains many flashbacks of Sam at various ages. It was inspired by an episode of the old Nickeldeon cartoon Hey Arnold! The episode is called 'Helga on the Couch.' If you've never seen it (or Hey Arnold for that matter) you should consider watching it on youtube. Its a great episode and a great show.
Summary: Takes place after the events of iOMG and before the beginning of iLost My Mind (although a couple end chapters may be added that take place after the events of iLost My Mind). Sam heads to Troubled Waters intending to check herself in but finds out she must first meet with a doctor to confirm she needs psychiatric help. Throughout the session Dr. Bliss learns about Sam through her relationships with the people in her life (Melanie, her mother, Spencer, Carly, and finally Freddie).
Note: I do use Dr. Bliss (the name of the doctor in the Hey Arnold episode) as the name of the doctor in this story. If you've seen the episode you can decide for yourself ifs the same doctor. I didn't intend for it to be the same doctor so much as it was to be a homage to such a great episode, but her looks and personality are similar so they could be the same-it really has no affect on the story.
Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly.
Sam's Session
Chapter One: iMeet Dr. Bliss
Sun was trying to force its way through the clouds in the sky above Seattle. Sam hoped the sun would win the fight; her destination was quite the walk from the bus stop and she rather it didn't start pouring rain on her head. Unfortunately the weather was not in Sam's favor and because the duffle bag over her shoulder didn't contain an umbrella she was soaked to the skin with rain by the time she reached the front doors of the large brick building.
Troubled Waters Mental Institute. At least she had found the right place.
Early this morning, after she had picked the lock at the school and caught the last bus back to her house, Sam had searched 'Seattle Mental Institutes' on Zaplook and Troubled Waters seemed like the perfect one for her. Not only did they take patients with the typical mental medical conditions but they handled ones that could be categorized as bizarre and abnormal.
And what could be more bizarre and abnormal then Samantha Puckett throwing herself at Fredward Benson and kissing him into a state of paralysis?
She still couldn't believe she had done that.
Trying not to think about it Sam walked into the lobby and pulled her wet jacket more tightly around her. Of course the place would be blasting its air-conditioning. She hurried over to the front desk where a tired looking nurse was on the phone. Sam impatiently tapped her foot and drummed her fingers on the desk until the nurse finally finished.
"How may I help you?"
"I need to be admitted." Sam's reply was so straightforward that the nurse was taken back. She smiled at Sam and folded her hands across the desk.
"Are you certain about this miss-"
"Puckett." Sam finished. "And yes, I'm positive."
The nurse shuffled a few objects on her desk, making her disinterest very clear, as she spoke. "Miss Puckett to admit you to Trouble Waters I'm afraid you need a referral from a doctor stating that you in fact have a mental illness or need medical attention or care."
"You should consider putting that on your website." Sam was getting frustrated with this nurse, Miss Pelvin, according to her name tag. "Look I already came all the way here and I don't need some doctor to confirm that I'm crazy I already know that I am."
"Why is it that you think you are 'crazy?'"
"Because," Sam hesitated. She needed to convey to this nurse just how insane she was in a way that didn't make her sound like some poor confused preteen sob story. "There's this boy." She started.
"I see," Miss Pelvin continued to observe her skeptically.
Sam struggled for words. "And I hate him."
"Do you think this hatred for him may put him in danger?" Sam thought she saw a glimmer of interest in the nurse's eyes.
"No more than usual, less actually," she shook her head, trying to organize her thoughts. "See I also-" she looked around the room before leaning in closely, "I also like him."
"Miss Puckett," the nurse said testily, "I don't think you need mental care; I think you need a diary, some good friends and perhaps a pint of ice cream to help you work out your conflicted feelings for this boy."
"But you don't understand I've hated this boy since the moment I met him," Sam argued desperately, "I can't talk to anyone about it because my best friend, well this boy has been in love with her since the moment he saw her, and I don't have any other close friends except for this boy and I do have a sister but she is on like the other side of the country and my mom is out of town, not that either of them would care anyways."
Sam's hysteria had drawn the attention of the few other lobby patrons. Miss Pelvin stood from her chair and placed her hands on the desk. "Unfortunately Miss Puckett there is nothing I can do to help you,"
"But-" Sam's fists were clenched, one at her side the other around the strap of her duffle bag which had slipped to the floor. What was she supposed to do now? She didn't even have bus fare to get back home.
"Miss Pelvin." The nurse and Sam turned to see a women standing at the other end of the desk. She wasn't dressed in scrubs but in a sweater and nice skirt. Sam concluded she must have worked there by the tone with which she addressed the nurse. "I think I can help Miss Puckett." She turned to speak to Sam directly.
"I'm Dr. Bliss," she held out her hand. Sam unclenched her fist and shook hands with the middle aged brunette women. "Sam Puckett."
"It's nice to meet you Sam, I'm a psychologist that works here with the patients and if you aren't busy I'd love to sit down and have a chat with you."
Sam looked around uncertainly. "If I do that can I be admitted?"
"If I think you need the medical attention then yes."
"If you don't can you give me a ride home, I don't have enough money to take the bus." She was being completely serious and she was never one to be comfortable talking about her feelings with people so it was extremely likely she was going to need a way to get home. It should have occurred to her sooner that she was going to have to talk her problems out with the doctors at the mental institution.
Dr. Bliss gave a little laugh. "I'll see if I can work something out for you."
"Okay then."
Nurse Pelvin watched the exchange in shock. "Dr. Bliss I really don't think this girl has any mental illness."
"And I think there may be more to Sam than what meets the eye." Sam smiled. That probably wasn't meant to be a compliment but it was helping her win the debate with the nurse and that's all that mattered at the moment. The actual state of her mental health could wait.
"Don't you have other appointments to take care of, Miss Burell's regular morning appointment." Sam did her best not to listen when Dr. Bliss replied to the nurse's inquisition knowing there was supposed to be some sort of confidentiality. She still managed to catch the phrases 'checked out' and 'healthy weight.'
"Of course, but-" Nurse Pelvin glanced at her appointment book. "What about Mr. Anderson?"
Dr. Bliss's response came quick and again Sam overheard phrases such as 'family visit' and 'anniversary or their loss.' It all made her uncomfortable. She fidgeted, hoping they knew she was still there.
"And I had intended to leave early today," her voice rose a bit, "so the rest of my schedule is clear, if you could please take down Sam's information and then direct her to my office it would be much appreciated."
"I'll do that." Nurse Pelvin started to gather some papers and Dr. Bliss nodded to Sam with a smile before walking off into the building. Sam took the papers handed to her and as she started to fill in the information she began to feel uncertain about whether she needed to be at the mental institution or not.
She handed the papers back to the frazzled nurse who pointed her in the same direction Dr. Bliss had left in. As she walked away she heard the nurse on the phone again with who must have been her supervisor asking to be transferred to a different wing of the hospital.
She drifted down an empty hall, reading off the room numbers and finally found the one with Dr. Bliss printed over it.
She knocked and entered before there could be a reply. The room was cozy and reminded Sam of the room where she and her mom went for family therapy only smaller and friendlier. It wasn't quite as sprightly a place as where the school used to send her for anger management therapy.
"Good morning Sam," Dr. Bliss was sitting in a large arm chair with a cup of coffee in hand.
"Hey," Sam looked around uncomfortably. Her bag was starting to feel heavy, her hair was getting frizzier as it dried and her damp clothes stuck to her awkwardly.
"I see you were already to move in and everything, well just drop your bag by the door and sit anywhere," Sam did as she was told. It occurred to her in the back of her mind that the polite thing to do would be not to sit her self in her soaking wet clothes on the nice upholstered couch; but she was never one to be polite.
"I'm beginning to think this was a bad idea." She said honestly from where she perched on the edge of the cushion.
"What do you mean?"
"Well from the sounds of it your other patients have real issues," Sam said nervously adjusting her clothes to make them less uncomfortable. "I didn't mean to eavesdrop by the way."
"In the lobby you seemed pretty sure your problem was serious too."
"I can be a bit dramatic." Sam admitted.
Dr. Bliss laughed lightly. "Well I think that if you think your problem is serious it's worth listening too."
Now Sam felt really uncomfortable. This woman wanted her to spill her guts and she really wasn't good at that. And what if she didn't think she was crazy. Where did that leave her?
"Well you heard what's wrong with me," Sam blurted out. "The whole lobby did."
"This is true but it might be helpful to hear it again, I can get a clearer understanding."
"How can I be clearer, I hate him and I like him, do normal people have feelings like this?" She was too anxious to sit. She jumped up from her seat and impatiently moved across the room to the window.
The doctor watched as Sam crossed the room in only a few quick steps. "It's uncommon but unfortunately it's like Nurse Pelvin said it's not enough to qualify you for mental illness."
"If you agree with her then why did you even invite me back here?" Sam's feelings were already out-of-whack and now the discomfort from before was completely replaced by annoyance. She was nearly ready to turn back to the door.
"Does this him have a name?"
Sam was startled by the quick change in topic. Not to mention Dr. Bliss's calm delivery of the question. "Excuse me."
"I feel that you may have reason to believe you're "crazy," as you put it, but to know for sure I think I need to know a little bit more about you and this boy, who still remains nameless, and maybe about the other relationships in your life." Dr. Bliss explained. Sam supposed that made sense but-
"That's awfully nosy."
She laughed again, this time much more openly. "Yes I suppose it is but I do mean well and I promise nothing you tell me leaves this room." Sam didn't say anything. She stood there, still ready to make a run for it if necessary, trying to decide if she really wanted to share her feelings with this woman she just met.
"And what exactly do the other relationships in my life have to do with how I feel about Freddie?"
"So he does have a name," Sam crossed her arms defensively. "You don't seem fond of talking about your feelings and a lot of that has to do with your relationships with family, friends-"
"You want me to talk about my dysfunctional family?" Sam asked almost amused by the thought.
"Sometimes it helps to start with talking about someone you are more distant from and work your way up to those you're closest too."
"My sister lives the farthest away if that's what you mean."
"Not exactly what I meant but yes I suppose we can start with your sister," Dr. Bliss placed her coffee down and picked up a notepad from the table. "Tell me about her."
Sam leaned back against the window frame, deciding how to start. "Well her name is Melanie and she's my twin."
So what do you all think? Let me know. I'll try to come up with a update schedule like I did with my last chapter story. This one is shorter though and while chapters 1 through 7 are basically done 8-10 are barely written. The rest of the chapters are about half done.