Author's Notice: Oi!! O genki desu ka, tomodachi? (Hey! How are you, my friends?) Wow....i realize it's been quite a while since i've posted anything...so i wrote this. This may come as a shock to some of you, but - unlike most of my fics - this story has...NO LEMON!!! *le gasp* Yes, that's right. I wrote this in my Ceramics class (was too lazy to work on my Timcanpy sculpture), so it was just a quick thing that popped into my little old mind. It's mainly just agnst, and a little fluff. Hope you all enjoy!! Ja ne!! (Later!!)
Warning: Contains guys kissing other guys, foul language, and spoilers about Fai's past. Don't like? Don't read.
Diclaimer: Goddess, i hate these things....if i owned TRC, it would be called KFC - Kurogane Fai Chronicle. (lolz at my lame joke)
Speechless
They had nothing to say to each other. And yet they never broke eye contact. Not blinking, and not making a sound. Fai stared up at Kurogane, confusion flitting briefly across his face, before he was once again hiding behind that trademark goofy grin. Kurogane continued to scowl down at the mage, obviously frustrated that his impulsive attempt to break through the smaller man's shell had failed. They'd been friends for over a year now, and still the ninja knew next to nothing about his young traveling companion.
It had just been one kiss; short and sweet. But both men had been shocked into silence by Kurogane's unexpected actions. Finally breaking the awkward stare, Kurogane ran a calloused hand through his short black spikes, noting that he would need a haircut soon. When he looked back up, Fai was shaking with silent laughter, his wispy blonde hair bouncing lightly around his shoulders.
"Wha….what the Hell are you laughing at, you stupid mage!?" the ninja all but shouted at him. Fai delicately placed a hand over his mouth to stifle his giggles. Once the blonde had calmed down some, he brought his hand back down to rest at his side. His lips adorned a small smile – a genuine smile – the likes of which Kurogane had never before seen on the young wizard.
"Kurogane's blushing!!" the magician exclaimed gleefully, his cerulean blue eyes sparkling with mirth. Kurogane raised an eyebrow, and shook his head.
"You…I'll never understand you," he sighed.
"And that's the whole point, isn't it?"
"No!" Kurogane insisted. "Damnit, why do you always make me so mad? Why can't you drop that stupid smile for once in your life, and just be honest with yourself!? I don't know what happened to you in your past, and I honestly don't give a fuck! Just stop faking!!"
Fai's smile faltered for only a brief fraction of a second, but Kurogane saw it. He always saw, when it came to Fai.
"I don't want to see that mask anymore, Fai. I'll destroy it myself, if I have to," growled the ninja, his voice hard, and a stubborn determination in his red eyes.
Fai laughed, but the sound was sad and distant, and rather cynical. "It'll take a lot more than just one small kiss to break down these walls, Kurogane. I am assuming that is why you kissed me?"
"That's…part of the reason." Kurogane's voice was soft, but he retained the eye contact between them.
Fai tilted his head to the side. "Then, what's the other part?"
Kurogane shook his head slightly, muttering something that sounded suspiciously like 'dumb wizard just doesn't get it'. Then suddenly, he stepped forward, wrapping his strong arms around the mage, and pulling him close. Pressing his lips to the blonde's ear, he whispered, "Because I wanted to." Then he pulled back slightly, and leaned in for another soft kiss. As soon as it had begun, it was over, and the ninja released the man in his arms.
Fai nodded slowly, his infuriating grin completely gone, and his eyes harboring a look of defeat. He sat on the ground, leaning his back against a tree, and patted the soft earth beside him, indicating for Kurogane to take a seat as well. He waited for the ninja to sit down next to him, and then the magician began to speak. His voice was soft and low, but it was filled with the young man's true emotions, and not the constant cheer he was so used to displaying.
"…Back in my Country….back in Celes…I was the High Mage, and I had free reign of the Kingdom. I was second only to the King himself. Ashura-ou was my life – I lived for him. He had saved me; back when I was doomed to a life of despair, trapped in my own misery. I owed him my life, and gave him whatever he wanted. But he was using me, and I was just too devoted to his will to see it."
Kurogane nodded, his face remaining passive, encouraging the mage to continue on.
"I was blind to the severity of my orders….to how wrong they were. I did only as Ashura-ou commanded of me, with little – if any – regard to the consequences. I was numb inside my own mind. Over the years, my magic had taken complete control of me. I would return to the palace covered in blood, and have no recollection of the past week. It would happen more and more. But no matter how many times I asked Ashura-ou what I had done, he would only ever tell me that I had done my job well, and leave it at that.
"Then one day, I just…woke up. I looked around me, and I was all alone. I wandered the halls, looking for someone – anyone –who could tell me why the world now felt so…empty. But there was no one there. At least…no one alive. There were….bodies….all around me. The servants, the guards, the Kings concubines…everyone was dead, except me. And Ashura-ou was nowhere to be found. That's how I knew what had happened. What I had done.
Fai paused momentarily, rubbing both eyes with the back of his pale hand. Kurogane lifted his hand, ready to comfort the blonde, but thought better of it, and refrained. He would let the mage finish, before he made any reaction. Fai inhaled deeply, letting his head fall back against the bark, and closed his eyes.
"I had killed them, Kurogane. All of them. And not just the people who lived in the castle… I had killed the whole country. Not a single living soul was left." His voice broke on the last word, and he drew his knees up against his chest, hiding his face in his arms as dry sobs wracked his slender frame. Kurogane's face twisted in sympathy for the man, and anger at this so-called "King". To think anyone could have the nerve to do this to Fai! After only a few minutes had passed, Fai's breathing slowly evened out, and he lifted his head, blue eyes staring blankly into the heavy foliage.
"After that, I went mad with rage, and hatred towards myself. But mostly, I was just ashamed…ashamed that I had so blindly allowed myself to be used in such a way. I went looking for Ashura-ou, for I knew he must still be alive. I knew there was no way I could possibly have killed him, and I knew he wouldn't have let me. Finally, I found him, in the deepest reaches of the palace. I had had every intention to kill him, or to die trying. But once I saw him….I could not. And so instead, I sealed him away. I summoned as much of my magic as I possibly could, and I put him into the deepest sleep, in the bottom of a deep pool. And then I ran. I have been running ever since."
Once convinced that his friend had finished his story, Kurogane tentatively wrapped his arms around the mage, and pulled him against his chest. Fai had begun to cry once again, and Kurogane could feel the dampness of the man's tears seeping through his shirt. But he didn't care. It had worked. He had finally broken through. He had gotten through to Fai, and the wizard had talked to him. He'd been allowed to see the real Fai. The mask was finally gone.
And while Fai sobbed in his arms – the sounds of his despair echoing through the night – Kurogane was once again left speechless.
Author's Notice: Well then!! I hoped you all liked it at least somewhat! And for those of you who are Bleach fanatics like myself, keep your eyes open for the first chapter of my GrimmjowxUlquiorra fic! The only reason i haven't put it up yet, is cuz i can't seem to think of a good name for it. Hopefully i'll have it on by later tonight, or tomorrow. Oyasumi nasai, mina!! (Goodnight, everyone!!)
