Correspondence
o0o
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Vaan couldn't find a single thing to say. Not a question to ask, not an anecdote about city life to tell, not one single word comes to mind. Instead, he just stared at the piece of parchment, nearly empty save for one scrawl: Ashe. Nearly forty minutes of thinking and concentrating, and all he had was one word to show for it. Brilliant.
He let out a frustrated noise. As if that one name hadn't been enough of a struggle to write already. Penelo had always looked oh-so-immersed whenever she wrote her replies to Larsa, so how bad could letter-writing really be? Yeah. Right. Three scrunched pieces of paper later, and he still had no idea how to start it. As in, how should he to address Ashe? They were friends, but they were friends who had not spoken for nearly a half year, friends who had not seen each other ever since the aftermath of the fall of the Bahamut. She had grown apart from them, and now, he wasn't sure how to talk to this near stranger. Should he start with a Dear Ashe, like Penelo did with Larsa? Or did that imply an intimate, close relationship that they didn't have? To Ashe? But then that sounded too dry and boring, like a "to whom it may concern" type of letter. But then what? Your Highness? Queen Ashe?
And in the end, he settled with just Ashe. After that, nothing.
With a sigh, Vaan leaned back in his chair, hands clasped around the back of his lead, leaving one foot clawed around a table leg as support. His mouth scrunched into a frown as he focused on one of the cracks on the ceiling, trying to think of something to say. Nothing too nosy, or too long-winded; maybe just something to remind her she's still got her friends out there, even if she doesn't have the time to see them, being the queen and all. Yet even as he reminded himself of his guidelines, he still was unable to think of anything. His mind was blank. Zero. Nothing.
With another sigh, he could only wonder what Ashe is doing right now. Busy probably, with all sorts of duties and responsibilities to tend to, being left with the task of rebuilding a Dalmasca damaged by the Empire. Maybe a letter from him would only be an annoyance, just another item added on her already long enough to-do list. Would she even read it, let alone reply to it? Would she have the time to—
"BOO!"
CRASH!
With a not-too-graceful fall, Vaan yelped as he ended up in a heap of chair and limbs on the floor, while an amused Penelo stands over him, a smug look on her face.
"You know, maybe if didn't lean back in your chair, this wouldn't happen," she pointed out, obviously enjoying his pitiful position, as if all her previous scoldings and warnings had come together into a nice little packaged I told you so that didn't even need to be spoken. Vaan just scowled, ignoring her grin as he grudgingly accepted the hand up.
"Way to kick a man when he's down," he muttered sourly. Penelo just rolls her eyes.
"Oh, go lick your pride somewhere else." She held out a package expectantly. "Migelo needs you to deliver this to Gatsly in the Muthru Bazaar."
Vaan took the package curiously, feeling and throwing it up a bit. Several thuds, sounding like muffled cardboard resounded. Books. "Me? Why not you?"
Penelo jabbed a finger into his chest. "Because someone has to earn the money around here. I do actually have a job, you know." At this, Vaan couldn't help but wince in guilt and Penelo accordingly softened her tone as she straightened herself up. "Actually, I should be leaving now…"
Before Vaan could even defend himself, she's ran out the door, a whoosh flooding the room. Silence. For a moment, Vaan stood there, the quiet prickling his skin in an uncomfortable as he mulled over Penelo's teasing words. She hadn't meant any offense, and he hadn't taken any, but the words were still true: he really didn't have a job. Aside from any piloting skills he might have picked up Balthier, he had no ship to pilot and no money with which to buy such a ship. All he really had going for him were his fighting skills, which he couldn't even make any money off of as most of the guild jobs were usually taken by ex-soldiers that lost their job when peace was declared. It had been a year and yet Vaan still couldn't find himself a steady source of income.
Quickly, Vaan shakes his head before he lost himself too much in his self-pity. At least he was able to make ends meet with his odd jobs and all. Placing the package securely under his arm, he cast one last look towards the piece of paper on the desk before headed for the door.
Perhaps he just needs some time to think.
And some fresh air.
o0o
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Two days later, Vaan was still sitting at the desk, agonizing over the words to write. The blank page stared at him, just challenging and taunting him, white emptiness laughing at his inability to write even a simple greeting letter. With a frustrated moan, Vaan put his forehead to the desk in defeat. How could he have still not found anything else to write? At this point, it's beyond frustrating. Now, it's just plan sad.
"What's got you down?"
Jumping up slightly (when did she enter the room and how did he not hear her?), Vaan looked up to see Penelo hanging over his shoulder curiously. "Just writing a letter."
"You?" Penelo said a little too incredulously for Vaan's liking. "A letter? To who?"
However, she got her answer soon enough when she glanced at the contents—or rather, the one word—on the page. Vaan watched her cautiously, almost nervously, wanting to see her reaction, when oddly enough, she starts to groan. With a dramatic sigh, she leaned back and seated herself on his bed, giving him an exasperated look. "You still haven't gotten over your crush?"
"What crush?" Vaan reeled back defensively. "I'm just…writing a letter to her. You know, keeping in touch."
Penelo just rolls her eyes, not looking convinced at all. "Anything you say, loverboy. But you should know a girl probably would want flowers too with a love letter." But as Vaan sputtered and tried to think of a witty enough comeback, her face suddenly broke into a small grin and she let out a quick giggle. "Just kidding, geez. It's actually sort of sweet, I suppose. And I'm sure Ashe would love to get a letter, you know, as a small break from all the other things she must have to do."
Vaan felt himself perk up somewhat. "Really? You think so?"
"Well, it never hurts to try," Penelo said thoughtfully. "But looking at the state of that letter... I'm guessing you need help, right?"
He broke into a sheepish grin. "Just a bit."
o0o
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Penelo could only smile at Vaan's shyness when it came to dealing with Ashe. As far as she could remember, she had always noticed a bit of reservation in Vaan whenever he was in Ashe's company, quieter than he'd usually be. And then there would be those times when she would catch him glancing at Ashe. Those very often times. It was still a bit of a wonder how Ashe never seemed to notice. Then again, maybe it was just because I knew Vaan that well.
Standing up, she went to his side again and looked over the little he had written. Well, at least he got it started. Not completely hopeless. Sort of.
o0o
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edited 1-15-11