She had no choice in the matter, is the only thing that she could say. James Potter had her, you see. From the moment that he opened his Hogwarts letter over the summer break and a gleaming Headboy Badge fell into his lap he knew it. He knew that this was the year that she would finally be his. And the moment that she saw that same badge that was shinning proudly on her chest, on his, she knew it too. James Potter would win. She would date him, and maybe she would be happy, maybe she wouldn't be, but either way the game that the two of them had played for the past three years or so would come to an end.
She wouldn't date him because she knew that he had changed, or she had changed. It was nothing as easily explainable as that. As far as she was concerned as she stared in shock at the gold badge on his chest during the train ride he was still the same cocky little berk that she had yelled "NEVER!!" to a few months before. The thing of it was she knew that he had her. The appointment to Headgirl was too important to her. She had worked hard, never once giving less than her 100 best all throughout her school days, just so that she could wear that badge and have that honor of being the Headgirl to let James Potter spoil it. Her 7th year was going to be the best; the prefects schedules were going to go out on time, there would be enough time and budget for a school dance and that year the graduation ceremonies would be beyond anyone's wildest dreams. For the first time in 7 years the school would not be out of control, because she Lily Evans, would have the authority to give the Marauders detentions and she would not fall prey to their feigned innocence and pretend charm the way some of the professors did. Her detentions would be so horrible, that after a few of them they would be too afraid to pull any truly terrible pranks, and they would settle down and study for their N.E.W.T.S and this was going to be the most distinguished class to come from Hogwarts since the founders put the school together. But, Dumbledore made James Potter Headboy. James Potter, if not the leader then the co-leader and co-founder of the most nefarious trouble making group of boys to ever prance through the doors of the school was Headboy. Lily had no idea what the man could possibly have been thinking, and it's not like she was in any position to march up to him and demand some answers, but James Potter?
James cleared his throat as he looked at Lily from the corner of his eye. She was obviously not going to be taking the lead in the morning's proceedings. They were supposed to make brief speeches about the up-coming year to the prefects, and she was sitting there. Seeing him had apparently made her speechless, and not the way that he wanted to make her speechless. Her long legs were gapping open, with only the natural fall of her skirt keeping her modest, her arms were limply held at her sides with her wand trailing on the ground; she was literally gob-smacked; you could count each of her small white teeth if you wanted too, and her eyes were just staring at his chest. Unconsciously betraying his nervousness, he ruffled his hair and cleared his throat.
Lily forced her gaze from Potters chest, too his head. The back of his neck and his ears were red. His fingers were playing with the tag on the back of his white school shirt, and she briefly wondered why he just didn't cut the tag out so that it wouldn't irritate him so much. That's what she did. Eventually, his words tunneled their way into her head.
"Yeah, um. Well. So...Evans and I are the Heads this year. But. . ." He stopped there and cleared his throat again, shooting another glance at Lily. 'Yeah. Maybe, we'll reschedule this meeting for like another week or . . ."
Lily interrupted him there. He had been in charge for all of five minutes while she tried to gather her wits and all ready her perfect seventh year was flying out of the window. Never let the underlings know that you aren't exactly in charge and know exactly what you are doing! The brats could probably smell fear! And if they couldn't, they would be able to recognize the aroma by the end of the train ride, Potter positively reeked of nerves. The first thing on her list for a dream reign as Headgirl was the privilege of being able to say that she was the first Headgirl to ever follow the schedule exactly. She would NOT be starting her reign off as the first Headgirl to ever have to reschedule the first meeting of the year.
Relieved Potter took to his seat as Lily stood and rattled off schedules and assignments. Trying to appear inconspicuous, he wiped his forehead clear of sweat, and quickly rubbed his hands under his arms, trying to use the fabric of his shirt to soak up extra moisture there as well. Being around Lily made him hot and bothered as it was, trying not to seem like a dink in front of her had been a full time job since he was 13. But toss in the added pressure of talking in front of groups and he was purely out of his element. He wanted more than anything else, to be sitting beside Remus Lupin, best friend and fellow Marauder, than to be sitting behind Lily. And that was a huge statement coming from him. From where he was currently sitting, he could stare, practically unnoticed at her behind, he could enjoy the way her right butt- cheek dipped down almost imperceptivity raising the hemline of her skirt on the left side when she used her right foot to scratch her left calf. He could enjoy the give and take of her white school shirt as she moved her arms in emphasis of whatever points she was making and he could enjoy the way Moony was shaking with silent laughter, because he knew exactly what his friend was doing as he pretended to pay attention to the Headgirl's words. When Lily placed her hands on her hips and leveled her feet once more on the ground, James allowed his wandering gaze to move to her head. Her hair was pulled up into some weird knot thing, the were curly bits around the nape of her neck, but this time it was what she was saying that was captivating him. Although she was speaking to the prefects, the words were specifically for the Headboy. Lily Evans told James Potter exactly how to get her.
He knew that she knew that he knew...or rather, he knew that she knew that they both knew. He was sure that she knew that he knew that this was the year. That she would have no choice in finally giving him a chance. The Headship meant much to much to her and she would certainly not let running of the school, and the open, honest, communicative path between teachers and students become muddled because of her loathing to interact with him. As their fellow students filed out of the train compartment, James signaled Lupin to go on without him and he turned a dazzling smile on his partner of the next several months.
"What do you want, Potter?" Her voice sounded decidedly petulant. He was sure now that she knew what he knew.
"What? Can't a guy sit in his own special compartment for a few minutes without having to want something?" She wanted to snap that it was her own special compartment as well and what if she wanted to sit in peace--without him, for a few moments? But that sounded incredibly childish. Especially considering that the last thing she said sounded, to her own ears, like a grumpy little kid.
"If you're going to ask me something, you might as well go on ahead and get it over with. I don't want to have it hanging over our heads all semester. So, just do it." She straightened up, as if preparing to be led in front of a firing squad of death eaters, ones that she had personally offended, and looked at him.
"Yeah. About that." James smiled at her again, and casually ruffled his hair. He was as nervous as he was when he ruffled his hair earlier, even though there were no crowds, just her. He could feel the sweat trickling down his spine. "Um, do you think maybe. . ."
"No. And don't ask me again." She nodded once, just once, sending bits of hair flying around her face. Feeling that was satisfactorily taken care of she gathered her things and prepared to leave.
"But, Lily, I just thought. . ."
"I know what you thought. Dating you is the most horrid thought that I can think of, You- Know- Who included, and I wont do it, and I don't care how much you slack off in your headship duties. This is going to be the best year ever, whether you like it or not!"
"Wow. Actually, what I was going to say is do you think you and I could be friends? We're going to be working in close quarters and all. . ." He cleared his throat and flashed startlingly white teeth at her. And no, he wasn't going to ask her out. He had a plan, and alienating her was not part of it.
"Oh. Um. You intend on working then? You can't give out detentions to people that you don't like just because you don't like them and you can't give points to your friends just because. We're going to have to account for our actions and . . ."
"I actually haven't read all of the paperwork that Dumbledore sent us over the summer. I was hoping that we could have our first head meeting this week. Talk some things over."
Lily gazed at him and the papers that she had been authoritatively shuffling to occupy her trembling hands for the past several seconds shuddered to a halt. James Potter being pro-active for the head-duties? She cleared her throat and her gaze shifted almost involuntarily to his chest and the gleaming badge that resided there. She knew that she had been silent too long and there was nothing that she could say that could shift the balance of their precarious power struggle back to her, so she reiterated the stiff head bob of before and shoved her notes haphazardly into her messenger bag and she fled. And fled is really the only word that could describe the action.
"Prongsie. Dude. Headboy, the year is ours man!" Sirius Black opened the compartment door and loped inside. His grin which had been hinting at the possibilities that were now opened up to them with James' appointment was now echoing the nefarious looks of his comrades.
"Why are we all grinning evilly?" Peter Pettigrew asked after a few moments. Sirius and James had indeed sent ominous undertones winging about the room and Remus, reclaiming the seat he had recently vacated was smiling indulgently at the two. He had an idea of what was running through their minds. The opportunity to more fully manage their mischief with a duly recognized inside-man had gone completely over Peter's head.
"You'll soon find out, Pete m'boy." Momentarily acknowledging Peter before asking the question that had been hovering in the room since the meeting with the prefects. "Do you understand the appeal of leadership meetings now?"
"Oh, Moony if you had the view that I had this morning then I would understand. But you weren't seeing what I was seeing."
"Oh, I can imagine."
"No. You can't." The smile dropped from his generous lips faster than a falling quaffle. Throughout the years the boys had shared girls off and on. A Marauder chic tended to not mind being passed around, and dating each of the four boys before falling from their radar. It meant that she could hangout with them for a few days longer. Jealousy was a four-letter word amongst them. And it was the only four-letter word that was forbidden. Lily Evans was the exception. Third year James looked at her and fell. Literally. She was standing in the Great Hall with Michael Bambara, in the line to go to Hogsmeade. Apparently on a date. Her hair was up and she was wearing something---short, tight and extremely sexy (for a third year anyways). James was so busy checking her out that his hop over the vanishing step in the stair case was a little overzealous and down he went. He landed in a large lumpy mass of hair, elbows, and broken glasses at their feet. Michael helped him up and Lily fixed his glasses.
The Marauders followed them on their date and dumped things on Michael. It was made absolutely clear that day that Lily Evans was off limits. To them and to any guy in Hogwarts. No exceptions, period. It didn't take long for the other males in Hogwarts to get the picture. No one wanted to be on the Marauders bad side after all. The consequences weren't deadly but it's been said that while physical scars heal, emotional ones can last a lifetime. For an example, just look at Severous Snape.
authors note: hello chums. so...i finally posted the end to mixed messages and have started up this fic. i hope you guys like it. i certainly do. its going to be a 3 parter. you guys know me,and know that i'm hopeless when it comes to remembering the names of fics (or you know that if you've ever been to my profile where i'm constantly asking for help remembering one fic or another) but the general idea for this fic is from someone else...in that fic lily and james have to start being nice to each other because they have to share a book for a class. it was the last one in the store and the forced closeness made them able to see each other in a more favorable light. this fic isnt a rip off of that fic but i hope the sentiment of the fics are the same. i loved it and the style that that author used in writing it and i'm not ashamed to admit that that fic was heavily on my mind while i wrote this one. once i figure out the title and who wrote it...its probably in my favorites, i'll have to check,but once i figure that out i'll put the name of the fic and the author in my next authors notes so you guys can check that out. its really really good. so disclaimer here: nothing in the hp-verse is mine. sadly. to be rich would be mad cool i think. and the general idea of the fic while not new, thats not mine either. the only thing that is mine is the headaches that i got trying to write the 3rd installment. oh...and the pain killers to counteract the headaches...those are mine too.