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A/N: I've been booed for Changes (part 1) so here's the sequel/part 2! Yeah! The title is 'Changes' in Spanish ("change" according to my Spanish dictionary. And "Changes" is "Cambio" according to altavista) Hahahaha. Did anyone realize that before reading this? I thought it was funny. Of course the last was Rika's POV on the story so this is Takato's. I foreshadowed what was going to happen at the end of Changes so let's see if your suspicions were correct.
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Cambiar
Welcome to love!
Where everyone wins
and I always lose.
Let's clear one thing up first people- I'm not a pimp. I never have been, and I never will be. Enough people tell me that I am but there's no way it's true. These people are always jerks, or ass holes, or people who just want to piss me off. Do you know what PIMP means? PIMP equals 'Poor Initiative, More Pain.' That's what PIMP means.
People call me a 'pimp' because my two best (and only) friends are girls. They're the only people I ever hang out with, so people automatically figure "the three of them must be friends with… 'benefits.' " And that pisses me off so f-ckin much. Most of my friends from when Guilmon was around have disappeared… to say the least. Ryo was never really a friend, and so he was never really in the picture. Kenta became really unsocial after the entire events, but after about four months of not hearing from him I asked about where he went and Jeri told me him and his parents had moved away almost three months earlier… kind of surprising.
Kazu didn't go quietly. He and I got into a huge argument about the directions we were both headed in. He thought I was actually trying to move away from him, when I was trying to outreach to him and bring him into my world. That was a few weeks before freshmen year… Rika told me he had a failed suicide attempt during the past summer, and was carted off to an institution. I felt it was partially my fault, but never bothered to go and see him to see if I could have helped him out in any way. Henry was probably the only normal one of them all. He and I are still best friends, and we hang out all the time, but he had a choice of going to the high school me, Jeri, and Rika went to or going to the number one high school in our area on a full ride scholarship (because of his brains and after school activities- karate). Guess which one he chose.
Sometimes I miss them all… but thing's change, and I'm just glad I have Jeri and Rika with me to go through them.
I have no chances
I have no fears
I have nothing
I can't win her over
"Hey Rika!"
I look up from the table to see who just called Rika. I see Rika turn around about three, probably four feet from the table to face Michael Crayton. I contemplate getting out of my chair for a second to go help her, but she generally knows how to take care of these things. But I'll always have my doubts. I turn to Jeri, and ask her, "Do you think we should…"
"So, your anorexic, right?" I hear Crayton say loud enough for all of us to hear. I hear a lot of laughter and slide my chair back, while Jeri does the same. We go around the table and stand next to Rika for… comfort... or protection in my case.
Before I can think of anything to say Crayton adds another insult while he can. "So, ah, how many times do you throw up-a-day?" he asks her.
I have to stand up for her, and the words seem to just topple out of my mouth without me even thinking about them. "Before you start anything Crayton, you better think of the consequences."
He becomes sullen and his expression stiffens as he realizes I'm in more of a position to shut him up then Rika is. "You don't want to fuck with my friends." I added, feeling it necessary.
He tries to stare me down but I shatter his spirits with my own stare that's as cold as death… and apparently it is, he turns over and mutters something to the group of people at his table… probably about Rika… and a few of them laugh but most are still anxious to see the two of us fight again.
Crayton's a… well… he's a pusillanimous person. If you don't know what that means just look at the first three letters and just guess the summary of the word. He's always been on my back trying my patience ever since we were freshmen. He just always felt like he should be better then me… but he's not. The only thing he could ever say was that he'd beat me up, but I even expelled that a little less then a month ago. It didn't take long… pretty surprising for someone who's always thought fighting was unnecessary.
The girl that I love
Doesn't see me
Believe me or not, it's true
"I was completely in control of the situation." She tries to sell to me.
"And I'm just saying you were obviously not in complete control of the situation." I respond. I mean… she obviously wasn't.
It's the same day… after school. Were just sitting outside the school… just talking… or arguing, but we argue all the time and it's never about anything really important. This is just another one of those unimportant arguments that will result in both of us walking away feeling like we won the argument, when, in reality, nothing was ever truly being argued. I love it, but I'm not sure how she feels about it. "I don't need you to protect me, okay!" she says.
I bite my lip… literally, and look down at my feet like they hold the answers to all of my questions about life and my future. I didn't know that's how she felt. I looked up and she was looking away from me, maybe not even realizing I was looking at her. Jeri was almost done with her extra classes so the three of us would be able to leave soon… another awkward drive home.
It was a cold heart I kept
(you'd never be with me)
But you waited around?
(why'd I have to like Jeri?)
I listen to the ring of my cell phone in my ear as I wait… wait for disaster. It's Wednesday, the day of the week when Jeri goes on the bus home, and me and Rika just drive home together. Ugh, Jeri's week schedule is so weird. Monday's and Thursday's she has an extra class of advanced Chemistry. Wednesdays she goes home and then heads on over to dance lessons, where she gets more advanced lessons and also teaches, Tuesdays she goes to the Multi-Cultural club (even though she's not multi-cultured?!), and on Fridays she just goes home with us. BUT… we love her. Well… Rika loves her… like a sister she never had. Me? Mhm… not as much. I used to have this HUGE crush on her… even told her about it once (it wasn't really her at the time, which I'm thankful for), but in the years afterwards I started to open my eyes to the world and see that she wasn't the only girl in the world. God, she definitely isn't the only girl in the world. I'm calling her to… "Takato?"
"What? Oh, Jeri! Hey."
"Hey Takato, what's up?"
"Not much… umm, where are you?" I said, playing stupid for the time being.
"I'm just about to head over the dance studio. It's Wednesday, remember?"
"Oh yeah… I guess I just forgot." I said stupidly again.
"It's alright, but you should get going, I'm sure Rika's pissed you made her wait."
"Yeah, she probably is." I said, and looked up to see her sitting staring at me, but not quite in focus. She's out of it… probably thinking about something.
"So Jeri, the Snowball's coming up, and I wanted know if-"
"Oh my God! Yes! I'll… oh wait, are you…"
I stiffened a little… she hadn't finished what she was saying… but she was so close… "Do you want to go with me?"
"Of course! But…"
"But what?" I asked anxiously… there's no way she had doubts… did she?
"Oh nothing, I'm sure its fine."
"YES!" I yelled… although I know it was a bit late. "You mean you will?"
"Of course!" she responded.
"Alright! I'll ah… I'll see you soon then." I said, clapping my phone shut.
I smiled and took in a deep breath. This was it… things were finally looking up for our relationship… finally! I look around, because someone has to want to share in my ecstasy. I see Rika sitting there giving me a confused stare, but I don't care. I didn't even bother to say anything else… I just ran up to her and did anything my natural instincts told me was right. I was a foot and a half away from her and I still wasn't sure what I was gonna do but before I could run her over I felt my arms move up and reach around her as I gave her a hug.
I don't even know why I hugged her. We hadn't never really embraced out of just pure emotions… it was never like that between the two of us… I mean… we're really… is there any point? Rika and I… we're amazing friends, in fact, we're probably better friends then Jeri and I are, but for some reason… some odd reason I always help Jeri over Rika… but, well, it's just that… now that I think about it…
Whatever! I'm going to the Snowball with Rika… I mean Jeri! Not Rika! What's wrong with me?
We let go after only a few seconds; she had only been hugging me back for the end part of it. She looked at me with her owned, and copyrighted stare that demanded me to explain my own temporarily moments of stupidity. "Jeri… she just agreed to go to the Snowball with me!"
Presently I felt the pit of my stomach fall out. I had no courage in me… I had no fire in my voice… there was no joy in my stare… I was… upset? Even angry. Rika gave an unhelpful nod, turned her head and looked out back into the parking lot, and I wanted so bad to hear what her take on us going to the Snowball together was. Was she happy… not caring… anything! She said nothing so I just offered up, "So… you ready to leave?"
Why… why do I feel this way? Why is there no happiness about my manner? This is everything I've ever dreamed about… or… have I dreamed for something else…
Something more?
I see you alone
I can't play by the book
I'd say anything
"So, how do I look?"
Why is everything so wrong in the world around me? Why is everything going so wrong? Why am I so caught up in the people around me, and not concerned with myself? Why do I want them to be happy… more then I want myself to be happy? Tonight… well tonight's this really stupid formal dinner for honors students. I caught some lucky breaks in school and got hold of second honors somehow. Mom and dad didn't want me to come home because it's such a 'stupid idea' as they called it, because I would just be going back to school anyway. They'll be meeting me outside of school in just under an hour. Rika and Jeri got rides home on their own, and I'm just here waiting.
I've been walking around the school for about ten minutes now, looking for anything to take my mind off of the stupid Snowball. Ah! It was a whole month ago, but it was still one of the worst nights on a date I've ever had. I don't want to go into detail… just… ugh! It just seemed like we were shit out of luck the entire night. You don't want to know… trust me.
But God, it wasn't even like everything went wrong. Even when we eventually got to have fun I didn't seem to be enjoying it too much. Something just didn't seem right. When I eventually did notice (and it didn't take long) that Rika wasn't there, Jeri told me she didn't have plans to come, and I felt even more like a jerk. But why?!
Rika has always been that whole 'lone wolf' kind of person, so why should I care so much if she just put the act on just one more night? It's not like I could have done anything to make her change her mind… right? I mean… she wouldn't have come no matter what I had said to her.
'What if you asked her to go?' said a strange voice in the back of my head.
I stop in my tracks and realize I'm not five feet from her… from Rika! How did I get here? Why am I here? What do I do? What… what do I say? I… I have to say something! I take to staring at my shoes again like they hold all the answers, because right now, they very well might! Anything to distract her… to distract me! I hear, or rather, realize she's move her head up from, well I'll be damned, she was staring at her own feet, and is looking at me now… probably judging my appearance… thinking of something funny or cute to say about my stupid suit. Ha, that's just how she is… isn't she? Funny and… cute. Wait? What?
I look up and she's opened her mouth to say something… distract her… say anything to throw her off! Say anything, just to get me by! "So umm… how do I look?"
She closes her mouth and looks me down, as if noticing me for the first time. She gives a blank stare and says "Yeah… you look… fine."
I don't know what I'm thinking
I don't know what I feel
I don't know what I'm thinking
I think she's unreal
It's been another long span of time since my legs carried me to an awkward situation… oh how I hate the awkward situations. I had asked Jeri and Rika if they wanted to hang out today (Saturday) but they already had plans together, and I just gave Henry a call. We're at the park sitting on a bench over-looking a pond. He's throwing bread at the birds in the vicinity, as if he were an old man, and I his old friend.
He's certainly changed a lot too, more then even I've already said. He was already a bit taller then me before high school, but he's had a rather large growth spurt. He now stands a good two maybe three inches over me, which isn't much, but when you don't see someone for a long time you'd be surprised at how different they look. His blue hair is shaggier, but still slick. He's still mature for his age… with his own moments of immaturity that I give him credit for, considering how much it takes to get them out of him. He's got a steady girl friend now, which I think he's been with for two years now. I admire him for his loyalty and dedication to a girl, never cheating or lying to her… something I won't say I haven't done, but certainly not something I'm known for either. He's still smart, but slips up in science classes, and he's always got an excuse for it; for every year: Freshmen- "I should have never been in an honors course… it was way too hard!" Sophomore- "Yeah, the class was boring and my teacher was just a weird old guy." And finally, this year- "Fuck Chemistry man." Hahaha. He's always found ways to make me laugh.
Right now, I'm telling him about these weird problems I've been having with Jeri and Rika. It feels good to have someone to talk to about them; it really does, even if that someone is acting like an old man. He's used to hearing me rant about nothing, but that doesn't mean it isn't well earned. I used to listen to him talk forever about how crappy things were, and I helped him through it. We're good friends… no doubt. "I mean… it's so weird. I mean… ugh I don't know what to think, man! The Snowball-"
"Dance." He intervenes, mocking me by correcting it and calling it a 'dance.'
"Shut up. The Dance, I mean Snowball, was so crappy, and I'm not even sure how much I even care about Jeri… it was just so…" I search for the word…
"Crappy?"
"Yeah… let's go with that."
He stops throwing the bread… maybe because he doesn't have any left… maybe to talk to me. "Well, Takato, it looks like I have the answer to your problems, but tell me this first… who have you been hanging out with a lot lately?"
What? "Umm… Well, Jeri and Rika. That's about it, besides you, but we only chill like once every few weeks."
"Mhm." He nods and thinks over what I've said. "We'll, Takato… are you ready for the harsh truth?"
"Harsh?"
"Harsh."
"I think I'm more then ready… if it helps explain why I feel like such an idiot around-"
"Rika."
"Yeah… how'd you-"
"I just did." He responds.
"But… I barely knew… How do you know I felt weird around-"
"Rika?"
"Yeah! Hey, stop doing that jerk."
"Yeah… but I keep saying the same name, obviously I've been lucky. So, ready for your quiz?"
"Quiz?"
"Okay, what color is the sky?" "Blue."
"My hair?" "Blue."
"The heart on Rika's old shirt?" "Blue."
"Whose shirt was it?" "… Rika's?"
"Who do you care about?" "Rika… wait… WHAT?"
"Boo-ya! Put another one down for the home team." He says, picking his bag back up and goes back to throwing bread to the birds.
"But… but… you mean… you can't?"
He gives an annoyed growl, sits back up on the chair and puts his brown paper bag down and says, "Don't you get it? Don't you see it now? Isn't it obvious to you now?"
I give a shake of my head and he gives another annoyed growl. "Rika! YOU… LIKE… RIKA. And it might even be something more then 'like' by your denial."
I stop and think on it. Rika? All those times… all those stupid awkward moments… all those unsatisfied moments of quiet… the Snowball… I wasn't happy… because I was with Jeri, not Rika?
Suddenly my life in the past few months comes flooding back to me in a wave of realization. Everything, absolutely everything, was about her. All the way back way when she told me I was over-protective, and I felt bad about it… that was… I was… Henry was…
I lean forward so that I'm next to Henry, reach in his bag and throw some bread on the ground. I am at peace with everything now… I understand what's going on. It's all finally making sense… finally!
Did that really just happen?
Was that just for real?
Did that really just happen!
Is that how she feels!
Three weeks ago I was sitting on a bench next to Henry when I realized I had feelings for Rika. I couldn't act on them… there's no way on earth she feels the same. She would never forgive me if I ruined the friendship we had by doing something stupid. Jeri's been talking to me as if Rika was a fallen angel lately, and it's making me incredibly uncomfortable. Does Jeri know I like Rika too, and is just teasing me with these stupid little details about Rika that I'm just now noticing? Like the way her hair flows when she walks… or how beautiful her smile really is… or how lovely her voice sounds when… ah shit! I'm doing it again! Why? Why does everyone seem to know what I'm thinking right now? There's nothing wrong with my world anymore… oh no, now everyone in my world's out to get me!
'They are.' Says a familiarly strange voice in the back of my head.
I can't help but notice everything wonderful about her, but when I realize I'm noticing these things I just want to stab myself! Why… why do we always want what we can't have? Why are we tempted by what we could never touch?
I find myself outside school, listening to Jeri continue to talk Rika up. It's really unnecessary now, and I'm thinking maybe she does know what I'm thinking and is just rubbing it in/teasing me still? I notice Rika walking up to us as we're talking. She stops only a about a foot away from me. "Speak of the angel!" Jeri says, twisting my stomach into knots as she uses that stupid 'A' word again.
Rika doesn't respond, but neither do I. Instead, she gives her a weak smile, and turns her head to stare at me. She stares with fire in her eyes, and I feel my spine tremble as she tries to get me to look back into her eyes. I want so bad to tell her… to say anything to her that would improve my status with her. I give her a questioning look, begging her to not stare me down anymore… to stop the madness, because I'm getting lost in her stare. I feel misty, and as if I could melt away into nothing while looking into those violet eyes. They're… they're… they're coming closer?!
She's closed the small gap between us, and her bodies up against mine. She won't break the eye contact, and neither will I, but I want so badly to know why she's doing this… why…
She leans in and my spine seems to actually tremble as I involuntarily lean away, and she slips her hand up and around the back of my head, and brings me closer… closer… close…
She's brought me into a kiss… and this was the last thing I could have ever expected… that I could have ever dreamed of. I give no reaction… and I don't know why… she's giving me everything she has… and I can't help but feel spellbound. This is… nothing short of heaven. If this isn't heaven, then I'll never die, because I want nothing more then to be in this position, with her… for the rest of my life… for the rest of eternity.
She's still locked with me… and I'd die before I'd let her go… but she pulls away. She gives me a look of complete and utter destitute and I feel the worse. She gives me one more stare in the eye, and turns to walk away.
I guess… some things will never-
'NO!' screams an inner rage inside my head.
Before she can gets two feet by walking away, I reach and grab her by the elbow, and turn her around so that she's facing me again. This time, I bring her into a kiss. It last only so long, because I have more to say… I have to tell her how I feel… she has to know.
"Rika… I… I don't know what it is that we have here… but it's something!" I started.
She gave me a reassuring nod, and I continued, "It may not be much, but it's so much more then nothing! This doesn't have to be a crush, it doesn't have to be a like, hell it doesn't have to be love either… but we… we…"
She pulls me forward into a hug and says, "I know… I know."
Jeri, on the side, squeals, and comes forward to hug us both. "I love it!"
It's so like her to do that… so childish… so Jeri.
I guess… some people will never change.
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A/N: YEAH!!!!! YEAH!!!! Holy shit, I loved that! I really hope you people did too! Okay, so I'll admit, I never really foreshadowed how it ended at the end of Changes, but from my perspective, Changes really doesn't have an ending. I mean, it does, but it doesn't. I can't possibly end it on her(Rika), coming to the conclusion that things between them would never changes, and as for a foreshadowing, see the first like 3 chapters of Autumn Leaves, almost all of them end with Takato leaving. I purposely placed at the end of Changes (from copy and pasted)
"Were just going to have to move on with our lives. I look at him one more time before turning and start to walk away."
I never said she got away. Okay, so you're all like "Bull sh/t." and saying I'm just being cheap and stupid, well that's too bad. I know it was dumb, but it still makes sense, and regardless, the endings still the same: happy. I loved writing Autumn Leaves, people, but I really loved writing this! Wow. I really hope you all enjoyed it. Review please. Also, I'm going to be working on Promise next week… but probably not until then… the freaking midterms start tomorrow, get off my back!
"Gentlemen it's time to spread the word, and the word is… Panic."
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