"To Where you Are"- Josh Groban
Who can say for certain
Maybe you're still here
I feel you all around me
Your memories so clear
It feels just like yesterday, that you and I were decorating the nursery for our unborn child. We laughed as you chased me around the room with the paintbrush covered in blue paint. After a full 10 minutes of playful wrestling you managed to get some paint on my t-shirt over my expanding stomach.
I can't believe you're gone. I feel as if I should be able to walk into your office and see you, not Catherine. I should see all of your bugs, not pictures of Lindsay. I have dreams that seem so real, dreams of when I used to lean on your door frame and we'd have our usual discussion of where to go for dinner, but that can't happen anymore.
Deep in the stillness
I can hear you speak
You're still an inspiration
Can it be?
That you are mine
Forever love
And you are watching over me from up above
When I lay my head on your old pillow, I can still hear you say goodnight to me and feel your arms wrap around me, but in a second it's gone. I miss your warmth.
I wish I could talk to you about certain cases, or even call you the way you used to do when I was in San Francisco. Whenever I hit a road block in a case, I always think, "What would Grissom do?" I can't ask you now though, can I? I know you're probably up there watching me with all the answers, but there's no way for us to communicate anymore.
Fly me up to where you are
Beyond the distant star
I wish upon tonight
To see you smile
If only for awhile to know you're there
A breath away's not far
To where you are
I wish I could visit you in heaven. I know when we were together, I said I didn't believe in god or heaven, but your death has changed me completely. Why does heaven have to be so far away? I just want to kiss you one last time, hold you one last time, and have one last family embrace with our daughter.
Are you gently sleeping
Here inside my dream
And isn't faith believing
All power can't be seen
In some dreams, I just watch you sleep. I hope in heaven you're sleeping peacefully. Actually, I know in heaven you're sleeping peacefully because you aren't in pain anymore.
As my heart holds you
Just one beat away
I cherish all you gave me everyday
'Cause you are mine
Forever love
Watching me from up above
Sometimes, when I can't sleep, I watch our daughter sleep. I wish you could see her Gil. She's growing up so fast. In a year she'll be going into Middle School. You know, she's the best gift you ever could have given me. She misses you. She's afraid you left because you didn't love her anymore, but I explained that you will love us forever and that you will always watch over us.
And I believe
That angels breathe
And that love will live on and never leave
I believe that one day you and I will be reunited and then many years away, we will be reunited with our little girl. I do wonder though, when you die, do you become an angel? I hope you did because I always felt like you were my angel, even when you were on earth. I wish you hadn't had to leave, but I know it was God's will and that you still love me even all the way up in heaven.
Fly me up
To where you are
Beyond the distant star
I wish upon tonight
To see you smile
If only for awhile
To know you're there
A breath away's not far
To where you are
I dream of the day that I will be together with you again. We will have our own little paradise where we can feel safe and simply love one another. Until that day comes though, I am content watching our little girl grow up and become a woman. She's already decided to name one of her future children after you. It will be odd for our daughter's daughter to not have known her amazing grandpa.
I know you're there
A breath away's not far
To where you are
I feel and know you're here with me, guiding me. I can tell that you send me little messages from time to time, through songs I hear on the radio or how the evidence I really need for a case magically appears.
I miss you, I always will, but I know that someday we will be together again, and I will cherish that moment in my heart always.