FINAL FANTASY VII
Been There, Dyne That
(Open to the Sector 4 Slums, Midgar Elementary School, Marlene's class. Marlene and her fellow classmates are sitting at their desks. Their stunningly attractive teacher (complete with the shortest skirt since Tifa Lockheart's) is standing at the front of the class.)
Teacher: Okay, boys and girls, today is a very special day. We're all going to draw pictures of our families.
Boy #1: (puts his hand up) Ms. McKenzie? What's a family?
Ms. McKenzie: You know, a family. Like Mommys and Daddys, Brothers and Sisters, Aunts and Uncles, Nieces and Nephews.
Boy #1: Ohh! (puts his hand up again)
Ms. McKenzie: Yes, Boyd?
Boy #1: Ms. McKenzie? What's a picture?
Ms. McKenzie: You know, a picture. A simple sketch, drawing or diagram.
Boy #1: Ohh! (puts his hand up again)
Ms. McKenzie: Yes, Boyd?
Boy #1: What's a day, Ms. McKenzie?
Ms. McKenzie: You know, a day of the week. Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday or Friday.
Boy #1: Ohh!
Marlene: And Saturday. You forgot Saturday.
Ms. McKenzie: What-a-day?
Marlene: Saturday.
Ms. McKenzie: Can't say I've heard of... that-a-day.
Marlene: It's the day after Friday, but before Sunday.
Ms. McKenzie: Hmm...
(Cut to 7th Heaven, the bar, a typical Friday night. Tifa is serving drinks behind the bar. Cloud is sitting down at the table, drinking a beer with Barrett. Ms. McKenzie is there, drinking heavily and chatting to Reno, Rude and Tseng (obviously this takes place before he was killed). Ms. McKenzie is dressed very slutty, and is extremely drunk.)
Ms. McKenzie: My, I feel so... tipsy. (giggles)
Reno: Don't worry about it, Ms. McKenzie. It's Friday night. Have another.
Ms. McKenzie: Well, all right. (to Tifa) Hostess, 'nother beer here!
Reno: (to Rude and Tseng) It's all right, guys. We unload tonight. (Rude and Tseng high five)
(Cut to a bedroom, somewhere. Ms. McKenzie wakes up in bed, her head banging.)
Ms. McKenzie: Ugh... My head is killing me. Where am I?
Reno: (laying beside her, to her left) Morning, baby!
Ms. McKenzie: Ugh! I don't remember a thing! How much did I have to drink last night?
Tseng: (laying beside her, to her right) You must've had about seventeen beers last night, about twenty-five the night before.
Ms. McKenzie: Night before...? What day is this?
Rude: (pops up from under the covers, at the end of the bed) Sunday. (disappears underneath again)
Ms. McKenzie: Sunday?! What happened to Saturday?!
Reno: It's already been and gone, babe. You were so wasted, you didn't even know it.
Ms. McKenzie: Ugh... (quickly turns her head to the side and barfs up)
(Cut back to Midgar Elementary School, Marlene's class.)
Ms. McKenzie: Oh, Saturday! Come to think of it, I do remember such a day... vaguely. That reminds me. Excuse me for a moment, boys and girls. (runs off)
Boy #2: I think Ms. McKenzie might be a... slut.
Boy #1: What's a slut?
Boy #2: You know, a slut. A woman who's... a little too friendly with other men and easily led astray by 'em.
Boy #1: Ohh!
(Cut to the hallway. Ms. McKenzie is talking on the phone.)
Ms. McKenzie: Yeah, and if you could find my bra too, I'd be most grateful. Yep, thanks, Mr. President.
(Cut to Shin-Ra HQ, Rufus' bathroom. Rufus is laying in the bath, talking on the phone.)
Rufus: Ms. McKenzie, please. Call me plain old Rufus. We slept together, after all, for God's sake.
(Cut to Marlene's class. Ms. McKenzie is sitting at her desk. Marlene and her classmates are drawing pictures of their families. Marlene's friend looks over at Marlene's work.)
Girl #1: Who's that, Marlene?
Marlene: That's my Aunt Tifa. She's a bar hostess.
Girl #1: Cool. And who's that?
Marlene: That's my Aunt Aeris. She's the last surviving Ancient.
Girl #1: Awesome. And that?
Marlene: He's my Uncle Cloud.
Girl #1: You have a dog too?!
Marlene: That's no dog. That's Red XIII. He's a friend of ours.
Girl #1: Okay. So who's the black guy, he some hobo?
Marlene: (frowns) THAT'S MY DAD!!
Girl #1: Your dad is black?
Marlene: Don't call him that!
Girl #2: What's going on?
Girl #1: Marlene's dad is black.
Girl #2: Really? Wow.
Marlene: Stop calling him black!
Ms. McKenzie: (walks over) What's all the commotion over here?
Marlene: They're making fun of my daddy!
Ms. McKenzie: Girls, that's very naughty. You shouldn't make fun of someone's daddy just because he has breasts and wears a mini skirt.
Marlene: That's not my daddy. That's my aunt. (points to her drawing of Barrett) That's my daddy.
Ms. McKenzie: Well, same thing. Discrimination of any kind is wrong, girls. Always remember that.
Kiros: (from FFVIII, bursts in) Please, please, please will you have sex with me, Ms. McKenzie?!
Ms. McKenzie: For the 100th time, no! I've told you before, I don't sleep with guys like you!
Kiros: What do you mean, like me??
(Cut to 7th Heaven, the bar. Cloud and Barrett are arm-wrestling. Cloud is about to win. Barrett pulls up his gun-arm and points it at his face.)
Barrett: You wanna think again, punk?
Cloud: Eek! (lets Barrett pin him)
Marlene: (walks in) Hi, Dad. Hi, Uncle Cloud.
Cloud: Hey, Marlene.
Barrett: Hey, little lady! How was school?
Marlene: Okay, I guess. (walks off upstairs)
Cloud: Whoa. She seemed pretty bummed for someone with no real problems.
Barrett: Ya think so?
Cloud: Didn't you notice how unhappy she looked?
Barrett: She ain't got no reason to be sad. (pause) Has she?
Cloud: I don't know, but first grade can really take its toll on a young kid. I should know, the kids really gave me a hard time whilst I was in first grade. Mind you, I did turn up for my first day wearing a dress, so I couldn't really blame 'em, I suppose.
(Cut to Marlene's room. Marlene is sitting on her bed, depressed. She's looking at her drawings. Barrett opens the door.)
Barrett: Can I come in, baby?
Marlene: Oh, sure.
Barrett: (walks in) You okay, hon? You seem kinda... upset.
Marlene: ...I'm fine.
Barrett: Heeey, what's this? (takes Marlene's drawing)
Marlene: Just something I drew in school today.
Barrett: It's the A-Team! How'd you know about them? They're not even s'posed to exist in this world!
Marlene: It's not the... (confused) ...A-Team (back to normal), Dad. It's all of us.
Barrett: Oh, yeah! Hey, so it is! That's us, all right! (pause) Why's Cloud wearin' a dress?
Marlene: (annoyed) That's Aunt Aeris.
Barrett: Now I see it.
Marlene: (sighs) Papa? Can I ask you a question?
Barrett: You can ask me anythin', Marlene. (pause) Wait a minute. This ain't about... where babies come from, is it?
Marlene: No.
Barrett: You can ask me anythin', Marlene. What's on your mind, sugarcake?
Marlene: Okay, um, this is kinda difficult but... how come I'm white and... and you're...
Barrett: Oh. Oh! Oh, uh... Marlene, that's... that's quite a tough question to be... to be askin' me, I, uh... I...
(Cut to the bar. Cloud is talking to Tifa by the bar.)
Cloud: Come on, Tifa!
Tifa: No.
Cloud: Come on! It'll be fun!
Tifa: No, I'm not doing it.
Cloud: Please!!
Tifa: Cloud, no, drop it.
Cloud: But it's just arm-wrestling! C'mon! Challenge me!
Tifa: Cloud, look, I'm a girl, and you're a guy. It's just totally unfair to try and pit us against each other.
Cloud: Well, if you're scared...
Tifa: I'm not scared, I just--oh, all right then, let's do it.
Cloud: (sticks his arm out over the bar) Woo hoo! Big man! (Tifa takes his arm) Ready?
Tifa: Yep. But don't even think about going easy on me just 'cause I'm a girl.
Cloud: There's no chance of that. (he and Tifa begin to arm-wrestle, though Tifa is increasingly better and Cloud's hand goes down quite rapidly) Hey! You're a chick! You're not supposed to win! You're supposed to lose like a weak little girl!
Tifa: I did warn you, Cloud. I didn't want to take part because I thought I'd be in danger of losing to you. I didn't want to take part because I didn't want to embarrass you. You're just lucky no one else saw.
Cloud: (annoyed) Eh, I let you win...
Tifa: Yeah, sure.
Barrett: (walks in, as white as a sheet) Uhh...
Tifa: Are you all right, Barrett? You look like you've seen a ghost.
Barrett: Marlene's jus' asked me about her... father.
Tifa: Oh...
Cloud: Wait a minute. Aren't YOU her father?
Barrett: No. Not her real father. Her real father's... Dyne, 'member?
Cloud: ...can't say I do.
Barrett: You found out all about Marlene's true heritage on our journey across the Planet to stop Sephiroth.
Cloud: ...
Barrett: It was quite a large part of the storyline.
Cloud: ...
Barrett: You an' Aeris ate ice cream while I was tellin' it.
Cloud: Oh, right, that! Yeah, of course! It was chocolate flavour. Ooh, no offence, Barrett!
Barrett: No offence...? (shakes his head) Listen, I don' know what to tell her, man! I mean, what am I s'posed to say?!
Tifa: Well, she's... she's six years old now, Barrett. Perhaps it's time to tell her the truth.
Barrett: That I'm not her real father?!
Tifa: Even if you don't, she's bound to find out sooner or later. Barrett, I don't mean to sound... forward or anything, but you're black and she's white. She's going to figure out something doesn't add up sooner or later. It's best you come clean with her now.
Barrett: Eugh, do I have to?
Tifa: No, but I would, if I were you.
Barrett: Yeah, well... you ain't me, Tifa. And until you are, you're not goin' to be able to tell her nothin'. I'm goin' out.
Cloud: But what'll we tell Marlene?
Barrett: Tell her... Tell her her dad's gone out to do some thinkin'. (leaves)
Tifa: Poor Barrett...
Cloud: Yeah. But damn, that chocolate ice cream was good, man.
(Cut to the Sector 5 Slums. Aeris is standing on the street corner, giving hand jobs, I mean, selling flowers.)
Aeris: Flowers here! Get your flowers! Fresh from my garden! Get them while they're reasonably cheap! (Barrett walks toward her) Oh, hey, Barrett!
Barrett: Hi, Aeris. How's business?
Aeris: So, so. Actually, I lie. It's pretty bad. But I'm hoping things'll pick up come the spring. What are you doing?
Barrett: Just walkin'. And thinkin'. And wishin' I was someone else right now.
Aeris: You okay?
Barrett: It's Marlene. She's noticed that she and I are... y'know, not matchin' colours.
Aeris: I see.
Barrett: Tifa thinks I should tell her about her real father. Cloud also put in a little input of his own. What do you think? Do you think she deserves to know the truth?
Aeris: Barrett, as you know, I... I never knew who my father was. Come to think of it, I never really knew much about my real mother either. I was raised by Elmyra. She's been the only parent I've ever had. The fact is, she took care of me, and raised me more or less all of my life, and as far as I'm concerned, she's my real mother.
Barrett: That's touchin', it really is.
Aeris: And it's the same thing with you and Marlene, Barrett. You've been Marlene's only parent, and you've taken care of her ever since... that incident with Dyne. And anyone can see that Marlene adores you. You know, I'd even go as far as to say that as far as Marlene is concerned, you're her real father.
Barrett: Aeris, it was touchin' at first, but that second sentence jus' #@$%^&* everythin' up. She already thinks I'm her real father! She don't know nothin' 'bout Dyne or any o' that crap! Should I tell her about Dyne or not?!
Aeris: If you don't, it'll only come back to haunt you. She may find out from someone else some day, and end up hating you forever. I think you should tell her.
Barrett: You know, Aeris, you're probably right. I don't want her to grow up hatin' me. I hope to give her away at her weddin' in the future, for God's sake. Then it's decided: I've gotta tell her. (leaves)
Aeris: Flowers! Flowers for sale!
Man: (walks up to her) You got any poison ivy?
Aeris: I think so... (checks her basket) Yep, here you go. (takes out the ivy and pricks herself on one of its thorns) Ow! (falls over dead)
Man: (nervously) Oh, boy... (walks away, innocently)
(Cut to 7th Heaven, the bar. Cloud and Tifa are sitting by the bar. Barrett walks in.)
Cloud: Barrett? You're back.
Barrett: Where's Marlene?
Tifa: She's still up in her room.
Barrett: Thanks. (starts to walk upstairs)
Tifa: You're going to tell her?
Barrett: Yep. Wish me luck.
Tifa: Good luck, Barrett.
Cloud: Yeah, good luck.
(Cut to Marlene's room. Marlene is sitting on the end of her bed, playing with a stuffed chocobo. Barrett walks in.)
Marlene: (drops her stuffed toy and jumps off the bed) Daddy! Where were you?!
Barrett: I jus' went out for a walk 'round the block.
Marlene: I was worried about you, Daddy.
Barrett: Marlene, could you siddown, please? Daddy needs to have a little talk with ya.
Marlene: Okay. (sits down on the bed with Barrett) What's it all about, Daddy?
Barrett: Marlene, I... I... (gets up) ...I jus' can't do this. (walks over to the window)
Marlene: Daddy, what's wrong? Have I been bad?
Barrett: No, Marlene. You ain't done nothin'. It's me. I... I've got somethin' to tell ya, but... I'm not sure I can find the right words.
Marlene: Well, okay, we all get like that sometimes, Papa. It's okay.
Barrett: No, Marlene, it isn't okay. I can't be keepin' this from you anymore. It's... (sits down) It's time you knew.
Marlene: Knew what? (pause) You're not dying, are you, Daddy?
Barrett: 'Course not!
Marlene: Then what is it? (puts her hand on his) You can tell me, Daddy. You can tell me anything.
Barrett: When'd you get so mature? I'm so proud of you, Marlene. My little princess.
Marlene: That's right, Daddy, I'm your little princess, so please, don't feel like you can't tell me if anything's bothering you. You help me when I'm feeling low, let me do the same for you. That's what families are for, after all.
Barrett: All right. It's like this: I'm... I'm not... I...
Marlene: Yes?
Barrett: I'm not... I'm not... I'm not goin' drinkin' with my buddies tonight, baby. I'm stayin' here and spendin' the evenin' with you.
Marlene: ...that's it?
Barrett: Yeah, that's all I wanted to say.
Marlene: ...all right, well, that's great, I guess. It's been a while since we've spent some time together.
Barrett: Yeah, it has.
Marlene: Okay. Well, can I go watch TV now, Daddy?
Barrett: Sure you can, Marlene. Sure you can. (Marlene kisses him, gets off the bed and leaves)
(Cut to the bar. Cloud and Tifa are sitting by the bar. Marlene runs downstairs and goes into the basement. Barrett comes down and joins his friends.)
Tifa: She took that quite well then. I was expecting a few tears, at least.
Cloud: You're a great parent, Barrett. There's no doubt about that. You can dump the biggest bombshell ever onto a kid and still have 'em smiling.
Barrett: I didn't dump anythin' on her. I wimped out; I couldn't do it.
Cloud: Oh.
Barrett: So go ahead, Tifa. Go ahead and tell me how I've made a huge mistake, and how Marlene's gonna end up hatin' me for the rest of her life, and stuff.
Tifa: I'll do no such thing. Barrett, I'm not going to pretend that I think you've made the right choice here - that'd just make me a hypocrite - but at the same time, I'm not going to give you a hard time because of the decision you've made. Marlene is your daughter, no one else's, and anything that you decide to do, or tell her, then no one else can be expected to contradict you, because, after all, Father knows best. Right?
Barrett: Right. Thanks, Tifa.
Tifa: Don't mention it.
Barrett: Now, if ya don't mind, I'm goin' to spend some time with my daughter. And here's to many, many happy years ahead... for both of us. (Tifa smiles)
(Cut to the Desert Prison, the graveyard, thirty years later. Marlene, all grown up, is standing over a gravestone.)
Marlene: Hello, Papa. How're you today? Good, hmm? (giggles) I'm so happy, Father. I'm pregnant again. Yep, Billy and I are expecting our second child. And guess what, Papa? We're going to name him after you. You... the greatest father a girl could ever wish for. I miss you so much, Papa. But... I know that you're looking down at me, watching over me from above. And I know that, one day, we will be reunited again. Until then... (pause) Well, I'd better go now, Father. I'll come see you again real soon, after the baby's born. (the words on the gravestone read: "Dyne Lies Here") Goodbye, Daddy. (Marlene places a rose at the gravestone which reads: "Barrett Wallace, Loving Father of Marlene Wallace", revealing that she was standing over Barrett's grave the whole time and that Dyne's is a little further across the graveyard)
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THE END__________
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Been There, Dyne That
(Open to the Sector 4 Slums, Midgar Elementary School, Marlene's class. Marlene and her fellow classmates are sitting at their desks. Their stunningly attractive teacher (complete with the shortest skirt since Tifa Lockheart's) is standing at the front of the class.)
Teacher: Okay, boys and girls, today is a very special day. We're all going to draw pictures of our families.
Boy #1: (puts his hand up) Ms. McKenzie? What's a family?
Ms. McKenzie: You know, a family. Like Mommys and Daddys, Brothers and Sisters, Aunts and Uncles, Nieces and Nephews.
Boy #1: Ohh! (puts his hand up again)
Ms. McKenzie: Yes, Boyd?
Boy #1: Ms. McKenzie? What's a picture?
Ms. McKenzie: You know, a picture. A simple sketch, drawing or diagram.
Boy #1: Ohh! (puts his hand up again)
Ms. McKenzie: Yes, Boyd?
Boy #1: What's a day, Ms. McKenzie?
Ms. McKenzie: You know, a day of the week. Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday or Friday.
Boy #1: Ohh!
Marlene: And Saturday. You forgot Saturday.
Ms. McKenzie: What-a-day?
Marlene: Saturday.
Ms. McKenzie: Can't say I've heard of... that-a-day.
Marlene: It's the day after Friday, but before Sunday.
Ms. McKenzie: Hmm...
(Cut to 7th Heaven, the bar, a typical Friday night. Tifa is serving drinks behind the bar. Cloud is sitting down at the table, drinking a beer with Barrett. Ms. McKenzie is there, drinking heavily and chatting to Reno, Rude and Tseng (obviously this takes place before he was killed). Ms. McKenzie is dressed very slutty, and is extremely drunk.)
Ms. McKenzie: My, I feel so... tipsy. (giggles)
Reno: Don't worry about it, Ms. McKenzie. It's Friday night. Have another.
Ms. McKenzie: Well, all right. (to Tifa) Hostess, 'nother beer here!
Reno: (to Rude and Tseng) It's all right, guys. We unload tonight. (Rude and Tseng high five)
(Cut to a bedroom, somewhere. Ms. McKenzie wakes up in bed, her head banging.)
Ms. McKenzie: Ugh... My head is killing me. Where am I?
Reno: (laying beside her, to her left) Morning, baby!
Ms. McKenzie: Ugh! I don't remember a thing! How much did I have to drink last night?
Tseng: (laying beside her, to her right) You must've had about seventeen beers last night, about twenty-five the night before.
Ms. McKenzie: Night before...? What day is this?
Rude: (pops up from under the covers, at the end of the bed) Sunday. (disappears underneath again)
Ms. McKenzie: Sunday?! What happened to Saturday?!
Reno: It's already been and gone, babe. You were so wasted, you didn't even know it.
Ms. McKenzie: Ugh... (quickly turns her head to the side and barfs up)
(Cut back to Midgar Elementary School, Marlene's class.)
Ms. McKenzie: Oh, Saturday! Come to think of it, I do remember such a day... vaguely. That reminds me. Excuse me for a moment, boys and girls. (runs off)
Boy #2: I think Ms. McKenzie might be a... slut.
Boy #1: What's a slut?
Boy #2: You know, a slut. A woman who's... a little too friendly with other men and easily led astray by 'em.
Boy #1: Ohh!
(Cut to the hallway. Ms. McKenzie is talking on the phone.)
Ms. McKenzie: Yeah, and if you could find my bra too, I'd be most grateful. Yep, thanks, Mr. President.
(Cut to Shin-Ra HQ, Rufus' bathroom. Rufus is laying in the bath, talking on the phone.)
Rufus: Ms. McKenzie, please. Call me plain old Rufus. We slept together, after all, for God's sake.
(Cut to Marlene's class. Ms. McKenzie is sitting at her desk. Marlene and her classmates are drawing pictures of their families. Marlene's friend looks over at Marlene's work.)
Girl #1: Who's that, Marlene?
Marlene: That's my Aunt Tifa. She's a bar hostess.
Girl #1: Cool. And who's that?
Marlene: That's my Aunt Aeris. She's the last surviving Ancient.
Girl #1: Awesome. And that?
Marlene: He's my Uncle Cloud.
Girl #1: You have a dog too?!
Marlene: That's no dog. That's Red XIII. He's a friend of ours.
Girl #1: Okay. So who's the black guy, he some hobo?
Marlene: (frowns) THAT'S MY DAD!!
Girl #1: Your dad is black?
Marlene: Don't call him that!
Girl #2: What's going on?
Girl #1: Marlene's dad is black.
Girl #2: Really? Wow.
Marlene: Stop calling him black!
Ms. McKenzie: (walks over) What's all the commotion over here?
Marlene: They're making fun of my daddy!
Ms. McKenzie: Girls, that's very naughty. You shouldn't make fun of someone's daddy just because he has breasts and wears a mini skirt.
Marlene: That's not my daddy. That's my aunt. (points to her drawing of Barrett) That's my daddy.
Ms. McKenzie: Well, same thing. Discrimination of any kind is wrong, girls. Always remember that.
Kiros: (from FFVIII, bursts in) Please, please, please will you have sex with me, Ms. McKenzie?!
Ms. McKenzie: For the 100th time, no! I've told you before, I don't sleep with guys like you!
Kiros: What do you mean, like me??
(Cut to 7th Heaven, the bar. Cloud and Barrett are arm-wrestling. Cloud is about to win. Barrett pulls up his gun-arm and points it at his face.)
Barrett: You wanna think again, punk?
Cloud: Eek! (lets Barrett pin him)
Marlene: (walks in) Hi, Dad. Hi, Uncle Cloud.
Cloud: Hey, Marlene.
Barrett: Hey, little lady! How was school?
Marlene: Okay, I guess. (walks off upstairs)
Cloud: Whoa. She seemed pretty bummed for someone with no real problems.
Barrett: Ya think so?
Cloud: Didn't you notice how unhappy she looked?
Barrett: She ain't got no reason to be sad. (pause) Has she?
Cloud: I don't know, but first grade can really take its toll on a young kid. I should know, the kids really gave me a hard time whilst I was in first grade. Mind you, I did turn up for my first day wearing a dress, so I couldn't really blame 'em, I suppose.
(Cut to Marlene's room. Marlene is sitting on her bed, depressed. She's looking at her drawings. Barrett opens the door.)
Barrett: Can I come in, baby?
Marlene: Oh, sure.
Barrett: (walks in) You okay, hon? You seem kinda... upset.
Marlene: ...I'm fine.
Barrett: Heeey, what's this? (takes Marlene's drawing)
Marlene: Just something I drew in school today.
Barrett: It's the A-Team! How'd you know about them? They're not even s'posed to exist in this world!
Marlene: It's not the... (confused) ...A-Team (back to normal), Dad. It's all of us.
Barrett: Oh, yeah! Hey, so it is! That's us, all right! (pause) Why's Cloud wearin' a dress?
Marlene: (annoyed) That's Aunt Aeris.
Barrett: Now I see it.
Marlene: (sighs) Papa? Can I ask you a question?
Barrett: You can ask me anythin', Marlene. (pause) Wait a minute. This ain't about... where babies come from, is it?
Marlene: No.
Barrett: You can ask me anythin', Marlene. What's on your mind, sugarcake?
Marlene: Okay, um, this is kinda difficult but... how come I'm white and... and you're...
Barrett: Oh. Oh! Oh, uh... Marlene, that's... that's quite a tough question to be... to be askin' me, I, uh... I...
(Cut to the bar. Cloud is talking to Tifa by the bar.)
Cloud: Come on, Tifa!
Tifa: No.
Cloud: Come on! It'll be fun!
Tifa: No, I'm not doing it.
Cloud: Please!!
Tifa: Cloud, no, drop it.
Cloud: But it's just arm-wrestling! C'mon! Challenge me!
Tifa: Cloud, look, I'm a girl, and you're a guy. It's just totally unfair to try and pit us against each other.
Cloud: Well, if you're scared...
Tifa: I'm not scared, I just--oh, all right then, let's do it.
Cloud: (sticks his arm out over the bar) Woo hoo! Big man! (Tifa takes his arm) Ready?
Tifa: Yep. But don't even think about going easy on me just 'cause I'm a girl.
Cloud: There's no chance of that. (he and Tifa begin to arm-wrestle, though Tifa is increasingly better and Cloud's hand goes down quite rapidly) Hey! You're a chick! You're not supposed to win! You're supposed to lose like a weak little girl!
Tifa: I did warn you, Cloud. I didn't want to take part because I thought I'd be in danger of losing to you. I didn't want to take part because I didn't want to embarrass you. You're just lucky no one else saw.
Cloud: (annoyed) Eh, I let you win...
Tifa: Yeah, sure.
Barrett: (walks in, as white as a sheet) Uhh...
Tifa: Are you all right, Barrett? You look like you've seen a ghost.
Barrett: Marlene's jus' asked me about her... father.
Tifa: Oh...
Cloud: Wait a minute. Aren't YOU her father?
Barrett: No. Not her real father. Her real father's... Dyne, 'member?
Cloud: ...can't say I do.
Barrett: You found out all about Marlene's true heritage on our journey across the Planet to stop Sephiroth.
Cloud: ...
Barrett: It was quite a large part of the storyline.
Cloud: ...
Barrett: You an' Aeris ate ice cream while I was tellin' it.
Cloud: Oh, right, that! Yeah, of course! It was chocolate flavour. Ooh, no offence, Barrett!
Barrett: No offence...? (shakes his head) Listen, I don' know what to tell her, man! I mean, what am I s'posed to say?!
Tifa: Well, she's... she's six years old now, Barrett. Perhaps it's time to tell her the truth.
Barrett: That I'm not her real father?!
Tifa: Even if you don't, she's bound to find out sooner or later. Barrett, I don't mean to sound... forward or anything, but you're black and she's white. She's going to figure out something doesn't add up sooner or later. It's best you come clean with her now.
Barrett: Eugh, do I have to?
Tifa: No, but I would, if I were you.
Barrett: Yeah, well... you ain't me, Tifa. And until you are, you're not goin' to be able to tell her nothin'. I'm goin' out.
Cloud: But what'll we tell Marlene?
Barrett: Tell her... Tell her her dad's gone out to do some thinkin'. (leaves)
Tifa: Poor Barrett...
Cloud: Yeah. But damn, that chocolate ice cream was good, man.
(Cut to the Sector 5 Slums. Aeris is standing on the street corner, giving hand jobs, I mean, selling flowers.)
Aeris: Flowers here! Get your flowers! Fresh from my garden! Get them while they're reasonably cheap! (Barrett walks toward her) Oh, hey, Barrett!
Barrett: Hi, Aeris. How's business?
Aeris: So, so. Actually, I lie. It's pretty bad. But I'm hoping things'll pick up come the spring. What are you doing?
Barrett: Just walkin'. And thinkin'. And wishin' I was someone else right now.
Aeris: You okay?
Barrett: It's Marlene. She's noticed that she and I are... y'know, not matchin' colours.
Aeris: I see.
Barrett: Tifa thinks I should tell her about her real father. Cloud also put in a little input of his own. What do you think? Do you think she deserves to know the truth?
Aeris: Barrett, as you know, I... I never knew who my father was. Come to think of it, I never really knew much about my real mother either. I was raised by Elmyra. She's been the only parent I've ever had. The fact is, she took care of me, and raised me more or less all of my life, and as far as I'm concerned, she's my real mother.
Barrett: That's touchin', it really is.
Aeris: And it's the same thing with you and Marlene, Barrett. You've been Marlene's only parent, and you've taken care of her ever since... that incident with Dyne. And anyone can see that Marlene adores you. You know, I'd even go as far as to say that as far as Marlene is concerned, you're her real father.
Barrett: Aeris, it was touchin' at first, but that second sentence jus' #@$%^&* everythin' up. She already thinks I'm her real father! She don't know nothin' 'bout Dyne or any o' that crap! Should I tell her about Dyne or not?!
Aeris: If you don't, it'll only come back to haunt you. She may find out from someone else some day, and end up hating you forever. I think you should tell her.
Barrett: You know, Aeris, you're probably right. I don't want her to grow up hatin' me. I hope to give her away at her weddin' in the future, for God's sake. Then it's decided: I've gotta tell her. (leaves)
Aeris: Flowers! Flowers for sale!
Man: (walks up to her) You got any poison ivy?
Aeris: I think so... (checks her basket) Yep, here you go. (takes out the ivy and pricks herself on one of its thorns) Ow! (falls over dead)
Man: (nervously) Oh, boy... (walks away, innocently)
(Cut to 7th Heaven, the bar. Cloud and Tifa are sitting by the bar. Barrett walks in.)
Cloud: Barrett? You're back.
Barrett: Where's Marlene?
Tifa: She's still up in her room.
Barrett: Thanks. (starts to walk upstairs)
Tifa: You're going to tell her?
Barrett: Yep. Wish me luck.
Tifa: Good luck, Barrett.
Cloud: Yeah, good luck.
(Cut to Marlene's room. Marlene is sitting on the end of her bed, playing with a stuffed chocobo. Barrett walks in.)
Marlene: (drops her stuffed toy and jumps off the bed) Daddy! Where were you?!
Barrett: I jus' went out for a walk 'round the block.
Marlene: I was worried about you, Daddy.
Barrett: Marlene, could you siddown, please? Daddy needs to have a little talk with ya.
Marlene: Okay. (sits down on the bed with Barrett) What's it all about, Daddy?
Barrett: Marlene, I... I... (gets up) ...I jus' can't do this. (walks over to the window)
Marlene: Daddy, what's wrong? Have I been bad?
Barrett: No, Marlene. You ain't done nothin'. It's me. I... I've got somethin' to tell ya, but... I'm not sure I can find the right words.
Marlene: Well, okay, we all get like that sometimes, Papa. It's okay.
Barrett: No, Marlene, it isn't okay. I can't be keepin' this from you anymore. It's... (sits down) It's time you knew.
Marlene: Knew what? (pause) You're not dying, are you, Daddy?
Barrett: 'Course not!
Marlene: Then what is it? (puts her hand on his) You can tell me, Daddy. You can tell me anything.
Barrett: When'd you get so mature? I'm so proud of you, Marlene. My little princess.
Marlene: That's right, Daddy, I'm your little princess, so please, don't feel like you can't tell me if anything's bothering you. You help me when I'm feeling low, let me do the same for you. That's what families are for, after all.
Barrett: All right. It's like this: I'm... I'm not... I...
Marlene: Yes?
Barrett: I'm not... I'm not... I'm not goin' drinkin' with my buddies tonight, baby. I'm stayin' here and spendin' the evenin' with you.
Marlene: ...that's it?
Barrett: Yeah, that's all I wanted to say.
Marlene: ...all right, well, that's great, I guess. It's been a while since we've spent some time together.
Barrett: Yeah, it has.
Marlene: Okay. Well, can I go watch TV now, Daddy?
Barrett: Sure you can, Marlene. Sure you can. (Marlene kisses him, gets off the bed and leaves)
(Cut to the bar. Cloud and Tifa are sitting by the bar. Marlene runs downstairs and goes into the basement. Barrett comes down and joins his friends.)
Tifa: She took that quite well then. I was expecting a few tears, at least.
Cloud: You're a great parent, Barrett. There's no doubt about that. You can dump the biggest bombshell ever onto a kid and still have 'em smiling.
Barrett: I didn't dump anythin' on her. I wimped out; I couldn't do it.
Cloud: Oh.
Barrett: So go ahead, Tifa. Go ahead and tell me how I've made a huge mistake, and how Marlene's gonna end up hatin' me for the rest of her life, and stuff.
Tifa: I'll do no such thing. Barrett, I'm not going to pretend that I think you've made the right choice here - that'd just make me a hypocrite - but at the same time, I'm not going to give you a hard time because of the decision you've made. Marlene is your daughter, no one else's, and anything that you decide to do, or tell her, then no one else can be expected to contradict you, because, after all, Father knows best. Right?
Barrett: Right. Thanks, Tifa.
Tifa: Don't mention it.
Barrett: Now, if ya don't mind, I'm goin' to spend some time with my daughter. And here's to many, many happy years ahead... for both of us. (Tifa smiles)
(Cut to the Desert Prison, the graveyard, thirty years later. Marlene, all grown up, is standing over a gravestone.)
Marlene: Hello, Papa. How're you today? Good, hmm? (giggles) I'm so happy, Father. I'm pregnant again. Yep, Billy and I are expecting our second child. And guess what, Papa? We're going to name him after you. You... the greatest father a girl could ever wish for. I miss you so much, Papa. But... I know that you're looking down at me, watching over me from above. And I know that, one day, we will be reunited again. Until then... (pause) Well, I'd better go now, Father. I'll come see you again real soon, after the baby's born. (the words on the gravestone read: "Dyne Lies Here") Goodbye, Daddy. (Marlene places a rose at the gravestone which reads: "Barrett Wallace, Loving Father of Marlene Wallace", revealing that she was standing over Barrett's grave the whole time and that Dyne's is a little further across the graveyard)
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THE END__________
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