Songbird

'And I love you, I love you, I love you like never before.' It kept replaying in his mind as Stiles walked to the Hale estate. The lyrics to his mother's favorite song, 'Songbird' by Fleetwood Mac. Stiles had been having a less than ideal time lately. He and Derek still hadn't found their way out of the uncomfortable "what are we?" relationship limbo. Neither wanting to open up about the feeling they had for one another. He was debating whether to just call it quits, or keep hoping for something to change. The emotional exhaustion was creeping in since their decision to not put a label to this...thing they had going on. However, as of late, Stiles was growing tired of being afraid that Derek would up and leave him for someone else, which made no sense to him since Derek wasn't his to begin with. Or so he thinks.

Stiles laid in bed for a couple of hours. He laid there staring at the ceiling, just thinking about the whole mess his not-really-a-relationship had become. The thing is, Stiles knows he feels something for Derek. He knows it deep down, no matter how hard he wants to fight it. He realizes he's afraid. Afraid of how Derek will react. Afraid that Derek will reject him. He didn't want to wander through his mind anymore, which is how he ended up playing the Rumours album that once belonged to his mom.

He wasn't prepared for the wave of emotion that hit him when the track finally came up. He listened to it, consumed by the lyrics. He listened to it again. And again. He repeated this for another couple of hours, engrossed by all the memories he had of himself and Derek. He knew as soon as he realized what he had spent his whole day doing: thinking about Derek Hale, and what Derek means to him. He knew it's been there for a long time now. Just below the surface. He was completely in love with Derek Hale.

He wanted to tell him. He wanted to scream it as loud as he could, unafraid of everything that currently prevented him from doing so. He wanted to march up straight to him, hold his face in his palms, look him directly in the eyes and say it. Say it like it was the only thing in this world he'd ever be sure of till the day he dies. This one simple truth. Stiles Stilinski is in love with Derek Hale.

It took Stiles a while to muster up the courage to decide upon going to see Derek. He knew if he didn't do this now, he probably never would. He took a swig of his dad's whisky as he headed out. He decided to walk there, to be able to work through his fear. This is the first time he is willingly going to express everything he feels to someone else. More specifically, to the one someone else that actually matters in all of this.

It was close to midnight when he finally arrived to the Hale Estate, standing in all of its renovated glory. He took a moment to take in a breath and made his way up to the door and rang the door bell. It took seconds for Derek to answer it, concern playing on his face.

"Stiles? What are you doing here? Are you okay? Your heart is racing." Derek spoke as he searched Stiles' face for answers.

"Can I come in?" It was barely a whisper as it escaped Stiles' mouth.

Derek didn't respond, he just stepped aside to let Stiles in, closing the door behind him. He could smell the fear and anxiety radiating from Stiles and it only served to worry him more.

"Stiles, what's going on?"

Stiles looked him in the eyes, wondering if he should just leave. Derek picked up on his uncertainty and took a step towards him, taking a hold of Stiles' hands.

"You can tell me anything. You know that, right?" Derek said, hoping this would get a response.

Stiles bit his lip as he processed Derek's words, settling on saying everything he came to say.

"Before I say what I came here to say, I need you to promise to let me finish before you say anything." Stiles managed to say without his voice breaking.

Derek looked him in the eyes as if searching for something. They stood in silence for a moment before Derek finally nodded. A sigh of relief escape Stiles' mouth.

"Okay, how do I... Okay. This thing we have...uh... I know we've never really talked about it. I, I've just been thinking a lot, I guess. About it. About us. Me. And You. Together." Stiles mentally kicked himself for the things coming out of his mouth.

"This thing between us, it's been going on for over a year now, and we haven't talked about what exactly it is. Maybe it's nothing to you. Maybe it means nothing. I don't know...Ugh, this is not how I pictured this...Okay, thing is, I like this thing between us Derek. I like spending time with you. I like how I feel when I'm with you. To me, this means something. Something that I've been running scared of. I just didn't realize it until today. I know there are a lot of things we haven't shared. I know there are things that are hard to share. I also know that those things are the ones I want to share with you the most. I know I'm not making much sense here. You see, I was listening to 'Songbird' by Fleetwood Mac today. That was my mom's favorite. It was the song playing when she first told my dad she loved him. She would always play it for me when she was still alive. She would tell me about all the things they shared through the years. She would tell me how every time she heard this song she knew without a doubt that she loved my dad."

Stiles took a moment to gather the courage for what would come next. He took a step towards Derek and removed his hands from his. He took Derek's face in his hands and looked him in the eyes.

Stiles knew he had to say it now, and with a conviction that came from deep within, he began to utter the words that came from his heart, "Derek. I love you. I'm in love with you. I have been for a long time. But I've been too afraid to admit it. Afraid that I shouldn't have fallen in love with you. Afraid that you'll leave. It's the truth though, I love you. I will always love you."

Stiles felt as if time had suddenly frozen. He just told Derek he loved him and only silence had followed. Derek just kept looking into Stiles' eyes, letting the silence linger. A moment later he was gone from Stiles side. Stiles felt as if the world just caved in. He felt the surge of a panic attack coming. He felt his eyes began to swell with tears. Stiles felt his heart shatter and burn, turning into ash. He began making his way to the door when he heard it. 'Songbird' began echoing through the house. He turned to see Derek standing there. Tears in his eyes.

"My mom would play that song all the time too. It was one of her favorites. She'd always sing that song to my dad in front of Laura and me. She used to tell us that she met my dad at one of Fleetwood Mac's show. They knew they were it for each other even then, when they first met... Stiles, this thing between us. It is something. Something special. Something powerful. It's always been something to me. The only thing I have and am sure of. I love you so much, it hurts sometimes. It hurts being away from you. It drives me mad, like I have ants crawling all over my skin, underneath it. Everywhere. Don't you ever think for one second that I don't love you. I do."

Stiles just stood there for a moment, overcome with joy. He loved Derek Hale. Derek Hale loved him. It only took him a second to process that before his body went sprinting full force towards Derek, who welcomed him into his arms and lifted him in a tight embrace.

They both stood there basking in the on simple truth they now both knew: they were completely and undoubtedly in love. In the back of Stiles' mind, it kept echoing, the lyrics he knew all too well. The lyrics that brought him here. The lyrics that spoke the one simple truth. 'And I love you, I love you, I love you like never before.'