A Word from the Author: Hello everyone, it's jediclonecowgirl, with a new little one-shot. It's an Alternate Universe Wolfstar story, where Remus marries Sirius posthumously after his death.
When you were young your hopes were rising so high.
It was true, that you were a werewolf, but there were people who cared about you deeply. James Potter, Lily Evans, Peter Pettigrew and Sirius Black. There was one person, who cared about you the most though and that was Sirius. He came up with the idea of, that James, Peter and him would become Animagi for you. After eleven years of denial, you could feel, that there was hope for you after all.
When you were about 14 you fell in love, with someone nobody would've expected of you.
This special someone was no other than Sirius and even though he was the complete opposite of you already, you could dream about him eternally. How it would feel to dance with Sirius, to feel his body. You could imagine to kiss him and you could ponder for hours how his lips would feel like and how his tongue would taste. Sometimes, when you thought Peter, James and Sirius were alsleep, you would turn over on your side and pretend Sirius was with you...and sooner or later you pretend, how it would be like to have sex with him...but you thought, that those dreams could never come true. Why? Because Sirius had five girls at every finger. He never stayed with the same girl for more then a few days. When the girl was lucky he stayed with her for a month. This was rude, but it made you see, that Sirius and you just couldn't be together, but one night changed it all. A spring ball was announced at Hogwarts and Sirius asked you in front of the entire school. In the Great Hall to make it clear. The Slytherins couldn't stop making their comments about, how the greatest Womanizer of Hogwarts could ask another bloke to the ball, but Sirius had yelled "Get yourself hobbies!" at them, what had made them shut up.
When you had gotten your first kiss, you mentally told the higher powers, that they could take you now.
It was been the most beautiful moment in your life. The teachers had always pointed out, that this ball could be one of the most important events in your lives and bloody hell it was! Sirius was so sweet to you. He had dressed up into black dress robes and had even organized a flower, that you were supposed to put on your robes. Then he leaded you outta the room and you were surprised, that Peter and James hadn't conjured rose petals, they would throw, as you left the dorm. The two heads opened the dance and Sirius leaded you out on the dancefloor. In the end you had to take the lead, since Sirius had two left feet, but you still had a good time. Peter hadn't managed to find a partner for the ball and James came with this Chang girl from Ravenclaw. As the night went on, Sirius leaded you out to the black lake and that was, where it happened. He confessed to you, that he was in love with you for a really long time now. It was everything you've ever dreamed of, but still you were surprised.
"But...all those girls.", you stammered.
"Simple distraction Moony.", he only awnsered and then kissed you right on the lips.
His lips felt so soft, warm and sweet. The latter probably came from the butterbeer he had drunken, but it still felt so good. You returned the kiss and wrapped your arms around his neck and then his tongue glided into your mouth and started batteling for domination. As Sirius finally pulled away, because of the need of air, you felt, like you were floating on cloud nine.
At the first time you had sex, you were first nervous, but it felt the way it was supposed to: right.
Sirius had leaded you into the Room of Requirement blindfolded one night. As he had allowed you to take of the blindfold you were surprised by the appearance of the room: Rose petals all across the floor, a warm fire in a chimney, which was the only visible ammount of light in the room and a comfortable looking bed in the middle.
"P-padfoot...wh-what...", you stuttered.
"You'll like it Moony.", he only replied, gave you a small kiss on the nosetip and then picked you up bridal-style.
He covered your mouth with a kiss soon afterwards and carried you over to the bed. There he gently set you down.
"Sure you're ready?", he then whispered, gently stroking your side.
It sent a shiver down your spine. You were definatly ready. You only managed to nod, before his left hand went under your shirt and the other one unbuttoned your pants, while he had his lips on yours. It had hurt at first, as Sirius and you really got close, but then you began to enjoy it...and it felt right.
When the war ended, you only wanted to scream cry and throw things against the next best wall.
Crouch be dammed! The entire Ministry be dammed! How dare they spread such lies about the only man you had ever loved? He had never betrayed James and Lily. You knew it, but who would belive you? The four of them, excluding Lily, were the only ones, who knew, that James and Lily had changed Secret Keepers from Sirius to Peter. You knew it too, but Crouch wouldn't hear any of it. He said, that you were "blended by your emotions, what clouded your judgement"!
"Crouch you arsehole!", you bellow against the celling of your flat.
"You took my love away from me! You never granted him a fair trial! He never betrayed James and Lily! He doesn't deserve to suffer like this! If anyone deserves to rot in Azkaban it's YOU Barty Crouch!", you howl then and throw a bunch of plates against the wall.
They shattered into a million pieces, like Barty Crouch destroyed all your dreams and hopes with your lover! If someone else had been in charge of this, Sirius would've gotten a fair trial and the real traitor, PETER BLOODY PETTIGREW, wouldn't have escaped punishment! Still...there was nothing you could do, since Crouch was in charge and as a werewolf...who were you to cross him? You were not really trusted at the ministry after all and when you forced the ministry to roll open Sirius's case, you would probably only wind up in one of the cells. The only thing you do is cry.
"I will always love you Sirius...", you screamed between crying.
"I-i-i'll b-b-be waiting.", you hiccuped, as your sobs died down.
When you saw Sirius again, you were a teacher and he wanted to make the true murderer pay for the deaths of James and Lily Potter.
You were in the Shrieking Shack, where you went through your transformations back in the day at Hogwarts. You and Sirius were ready to punish the man, who not only made your lives miserable for 12 years and was responsible for the deaths of James and Lily, but who also doomed their son Harry to a life in misery with his cruel muggle relatives.
"Do you forgive me Paddy?", you whispered.
"There is nothing to forgive Moony. Let's just kill him.", he whispered back.
Harry stopped you though and talked you into handing Peter the rat over to the dementors, where he can be taken to Azkaban. You knew he was right. James wouldn't have wanted you to become murderers, just because of this rat! Handing Peter over went horribly wrong though. It was fullmoon and you had forgotten to take your Wolfsbane potion. After your transformation, your memory was wiped. The first thing you croak out, after you wake up is:
"Pad...foot..."
When Sirius stood at your door in the pouring rain, the fire, that burned for him in your heart flared up brightly.
"He's back! Voldemort's back!", he croaked.
"Come in first.", you whisper and pull him in your flat
So he tells you everything. How Harry witnessed Cedric Diggory die by Peters hand and Voldemort return. What happened after Harry brought Diggorys body back to the school and how horrorfied he was. How the Mad-Eye Moody teaching this year was the son of Barty Crouch, the man who hadn't even granted Sirius a trial, before sending him to Azkaban, how he was kissed by a dementor and how he was forced to shake hands with his arch enemy by Dumbledore.
"He told me to go to you for a while and help you contact the old order...or what's left of it.", he sighed.
"Shh...we'll worry about this later. For now we'll just get you outta those wet clothes.", you whispered.
The evening belonged to you. You fixed him a hot bath and stayed with him the entire time. He deserved some kindness after all the rough stuff he had been through.
"Remmy?", he whispered then.
"Yeah?", you whispered back.
"Will you come in too?", he mumbled.
You pondered a little, but you swore to yourself, that you would wait and the love him had never disappeared. You dropped your clothes and climbed behind him into the bathtub. The same shiver from back in the day, went down your spine and you instinctivly wrapped your arms around his chest and stroked it. Sirius head came to rest on your shoulder.
"Maybe this "lying low" isn't so bad after all. A roof over the head, a warm bath...and you.", Sirius whispered.
Then he kissed you and it didn't feel any less amazing, then at the spring ball, when you were fourteen.
When Sirius proposed marriage to you, you knew, that everything was going to be alright.
Today's meeting of the order had just ended and the members got up, about to leave, but Sirius held them back.
"Can you spare a few more minutes? I have an announcement to make!", Sirius yelled.
The members of the order turned around and looked at Sirius. He got down on one knee.
"Remus John Lupin. Even though we had our ups and downs, you are the only man I have ever loved and I want to spend the rest of my life with you! Will you make me the happiest wizard in the world and marry me?", he asked.
As he said the last words he pulled out a box, which contained an engagement ring and opened it. You are the happiest wizard in the world! You know, that there is hope again in your life and as soon as Sirius name is cleared you will get married and custody of Harry. Just as James and Lily had wanted it. The men yelled their congradulations, the women wiped their eyes and Snape just fleed the room with the words "I may vomit!".
At your wedding day, you just wanted to dig yourself a hole and die in it. It would be a good way to be with your lover again.
You fixed yourself up and looked really fetching into your white dressrobes. A rose is attached to your dressrobes, just like back in the day at spring ball. Everything could be perfect. Sirius would wait for you at the altar, the vows would be said, the rings would be exchanged and then you two would kiss...except for the fact, that this was not an option any longer. Sirius had fallen at the ministry a few days before your wedding and you had to watch it all go down. Sirius was trying to protect Harry and had payed for it with his life. You stroked a strain of your mousy brown hair outta your face, but then your vision went blurry and soon the tears started hitting the ground by your feet. Then you sunk on the floor and cried hysterically.
"Why did you have you leave me? Why did you have to be so bloody noble? We wanted to get married! We wanted to do so much! You even got your name cleared by fighting those creeps! Everything could've been g-good!", you whimpered.
Your sobs died down a few minutes later, since you did not want red-rimmed and puffy eyes on your wedding day. At this moment Kingsley Shacklebolt, who you named your best man, stuck his head through the door.
"Remus...it's time to go.", you hear his reassuring voice.
You jumped to your feet and followed him. You still wanted to marry Sirius, even, if it was only posthumously. Just because he's dead, your love for him won't die.
Ending Word: Whoa...one of my saddest pieces of work I've ever written. Well...my first attempt at that, so please go easy on me. I hope, that you'll leave some reviews behind. Now all I have left to say is bye, bye and mischief managed.