Hey everyone. Alright, so this is a MAJOR crack fic. Just something my good friend inni and I whipped up one day out of the blue. It's not meant to offend anyone, so don't take it the wrong way. It's just the kind of literature you get from us. 3

Anyway, I own nothing.

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Once upon in a land and time very far away, two somewhat friends were shopping at the mall for something they didn't need, or particularly want.

"You look s good in that outfit, Tifa." Aerith smiled, as Tifa looked at her backside in the many mirrors surrounding her.

"I don't know." She mused.

Tifa took another look at herself in a short red dress that she had seen in the store. It was a fiery crimson, with jet black cloth hanging from the back in two pieces. It wasn't something Aerith would wear, with all her soft pinks and whites. However, Tifa was drawn to the powerful color and nature of the dress. It made a statement. She just didn't know if it really suited her. That was why Aerith was here.

"Are you sure? I mean, it's not like I ever dress up all that much." Tifa brushed back her long black hair and bangs.

"Cloud will love it. Trust me." Aerith smiled. Could she show any other emotions besides a smile or a worried look?

"You would know, wouldn't you?" Tifa mumbled.

The two looked at each other with a measure of uncertainty. There they were, in the dressing room in the new building of the mega-influential superstore, Cid's. Usually, it was just a place to buy tools, and hang out with friends. Once in a while, you could catch the owner, Cid, and ask him about the latest ship parts. Or his twin brother, Cid. He dealt with finances. It actually was because of this Cid's wife that the store opened up as a full department store.

They had been in there for over an hour, trying to find the perfect outfit for an occasion neither had any plans for. But they were here, regardless. Aerith had spotted her gown upon entering the store. It was perfect for her, being a long pink dress, with rose trimmings and a short sleeved white jacket. The only problem then, was to find Tifa an outfit.

It had been a long time since the two had hung out, and it was not without their awkward moments. Aerith was with Zack now, but they had both loved Cloud at one time. Tifa wondered sometimes if he ever thought of her. Especially now that she had mysteriously come back from the grave. And she didn't smell like a dead person.

It was all Sephiroth's fault. Tifa didn't really care to know how or when it happened, but she had heard the whole story from Reno. Aerith had died after being stabbed in the back by the seven-foot long sword belonging to Cloud's nemesis. But some how, she came back. And she wasn't alone. Cid (owner #1, see two paragraphs above.) had introduced her to Zack, apparently another one of Cloud's dead friends. Tifa knew Cloud could act emo, but she had to wonder just how long he spent in the graveyard.

Tifa heard a shuffling noise behind Aerith that pulled her out of her Cloud-related-thoughts. Standing behind Aerith was Rinoa, one of their close friends, ever since the kingdom hearts incident. Rinoa had disappeared after the crash landing, and that was the last of that. Tifa didn't even want to remember. She shuddered at the very thought. Come to think of it, Cid had introduced them, as well.

"Boo!"

"Rinoa, you nearly killed me." Aerith placed a hand on her internal palpitating pump.

Rinoa was wearing a blue and white gown, with long, flowing sleeves and blue high heels to match. The bottom of her skirt was white, and there was a pearl necklace tied around her throat and hanging down her torso. Her black hair was shoulder length, with some caramel highlights.

"Hey guys!" Rinoa chirped. "Whoa, Tifa. That dress looks fantastic on you! Hey, so I was thinking, did you guys want to go on a triple date? Squall is okay with us dating, but I kind of want to put him out there. See what he'll do."

"Isn't that mean?" Aerith wore her worry face.

"He'll be alright. He's a big strong lion." Rinoa smiled. "Well, that's what he says. I think he's more of a cuddly teddy bear." She gave a great bear hug to the air in front of her.

"Well, I'm sure Zack won't mind. We don't have much to do these days." And the Aerith smile was back.

"Tifa? Squall might appreciate having Cloud there. They are very similar." Rinoa grabbed her friend's hands.

"….oh, alright." Tifa decided.

"Oh, goodie!" Rinoa cheered. "Oh great, now I'm acting like selphie. Ah well. See you guys at my house. Seven o' clock and not one moment later!"

She ran out the door with out paying for the dress and pearls. She was so excited, that she forgot she hadn't changed back into her regular blue coat. After a quick apology for kicking a guard in the face, she came back and paid, waved to the two girls and ran out the door.

"Well, she's energetic, that's for sure." Tifa sighed.

Aerith shrugged and watched Tifa leaved the platform, to return to her dressing room and change back into her regular clothes.

That night, Rinoa was running around the house in the dress she had bought that day, trying to get the hopelessly messy room clean. Meanwhile, Aerith and Tifa were sitting on the couch, straight back and uncomfortable.

"I'm so sorry, you guys. I just moved in and well, it's not exactly all that great." Rinoa sighed.

"It's alright." Aerith replied. Rinoa continued to clean.

The door bell rang and Rinoa appeared from behind a pile of boxes.

"I'll get it." Tifa got off the couch and answered the door.

Standing on the other side of the entryway was none other than Squall, wearing a black suit, blue vest and white tie. He was actually turned around, making sure that the four person car he had brought was sufficiently locked. With a curt nod of his head, he entered the abode, stepping over one or two boxes. The room was a sea of boxes, most of them stacked from floor to close to the ceiling. There was a TV and coffee table in front of the couch, but that was the only permanent thing in place.

"Hey Squall." Tifa walked behind the soldier, easing her way onto the couch.

"Hey squall." Rinoa called from behind her pile of boxes.

"What exactly is she doing back there?" Squall murmured to Aerith, who had also been sitting on the couch.

"I don't know." She replied.

Suddenly, items began flying out of the boxes one by one. Rinoa was mumbling behind the boxes, loud enough for the three to hear, but softly enough they couldn't understand. Items were flying from behind the boxes. It almost seemed that Rinoa was aiming at her guests as she threw, desperately looking for something. A sock puppet landed right on Squall's head. Moomba and moogle stuffed animals hit Tifa in the head, although she could have sworn a couple were real. Some chocobos and crossbows assaulted Aerith. She didn't seem to feel the items when they hit. And if it weren't for the moogle landing in Tifa's ears, she would have thought she heard a clanging as Rinoa's valkriye hit Aerith in the face.

"Hey, how much longer is Cloud going to be, Tifa?" Aerith placed aside the weapon that had been hurled at her head. The barrage had stopped, so they had a chance to breathe.

"He should be here any time soon." Tifa answered. With a thought, she added "I hope."

"I brought a four person car, if we want to meet up with him." Squall offered, glaring at the sock puppet that was sitting on his head.

"No good." Tifa contained a snicker. She had gotten up after the barrage and made her way to the door. Glancing out, she saw that Cloud had arrived. And he wasn't alone.

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So, who exactly is Cloud with? And what took him so long? Lol, make sure to review!