I put all my heart and soul into this fic. Please review. Its a touching tale about love, friendship, and betrayal.
-x-
Mello skulked through the halls of the orphanage inconspicuously. He dodged anyone who was coming down the hall, as this could cause suspicions. COFFEE!! He pushed the doors of the orchestra room open and quickly dodged inside. He felt like such a whore. But it didn't matter now that he was here. With him.
"Well slap my monkey's vagina! Near is such a bitch! HARUHI SUZUMIYA!! I know you don't like it when I talk about him."
Mello walked toward the cabinet slowly, embarrassed. He hoped he wasn't putting him in an awkward position. They knew what their love was. Unspoken. Unaccepted by society. Just seeing him with Mello could cause shame,
"Um, sweety…?" Mello screamed, concerned. He pulled the keys out of his laced up pantalones and unlocked the instrument cabinet. He saw the Cello sitting there, looking brand-spankin' kawaii. VICKS!! He reached out his hand, and proceeded to give him a sensual massage. He got lower and lower, finally reaching his G string, no pun intended. Then, suddenly. He heard a voice.
"Why don't you take a seat, right over there?"
Mello froze in his tracks. CRACKER!!
Mello turned around slowly, only to see Light Yagami standing by a massage chair that he was beckoning to.
"Don't be shy, take a seat, right over there."
Mello walked slowly to the chair. He'd heard about this Light Yagami guy. Something about pedophiles. But Mello figured he would be okay because rape was just a casual thing in his life now-a-days now that Near has moved into the orphanage. He could take anything.
"Now, Mello, what are you doing here tonight?"
"Well, just bein' stupid, I guess." Mello said in a kawaii southern accent. MELLZ!!
"Well, Mello, its about time I tell you who I am. I'm Chris Hansen from Dateline NBC. And you're on To Catch a Predator."
Mello cried "OH TEH NOES!!" and pulled out a gun and shot everyone in the room, including the virgin flutes that sat in the back of the room and masturbated.
Then he ran away screaming "OH SHEEIT!!" carrying the Cello in his oversized breast. Later that night they had a delightful threesome with Near. They named their child Matsuda.
THE END.